Hellsing Witch Hunter:1616
Sapphirewyren
Chapter 12: Sand Witch or Sandwich?
Disclaimer: I do not own Hellsing
Author's Notes: So, I finally got a new screen for my laptop. I was using my sister's computer for the last couple of months. I am so glad to have my own back, it's like welcoming an old friend back. So on with the next chapter.
A report came in that in the middle of the woods in New Forest in Hampshire, was a desert. Of course, this phenomenon was not a usual thing and so curious minds flooded to see it, only to be attacked by a sand demon or sand witch. On hearing this, Sam, of course made a joke; "What kind of sandwich is it? Pastrami on rye? BLT?" While Seras giggled, Integra found the joke as funny as a heart attack. The desert had been made draining the moisture from the surrounding trees and fauna. The sand only partially covered the bones of those who were unable to escape. Sam picked up a handful of sand and let it run through her fingers; "How the hell are we supposed to find of this witch?"
"You're not" said a voice from beneath the Hunters feet. "What delicious morsels, you three will make."
"If you don't mind, I would prefer not to be referred to as a 'morsel'" drawled Integra. "With your dying breath, you may refer to me as 'Sir'"
"What makes you think I will be the one dying? You are in my domain." A large mound of sand began to rise, when it stopped, the sand began to pour off, revealing a beautiful, tanned skinned women with light brown hair. From her curvy torso and above was that of a human woman. Below, however was the body of a large cobra, with tan and dark brown scales. Sandy (let's call her that) lunged at the three women, who scrambled out of the way in time.
"Did she have to be naked?" groaned Sam.
"Now is NOT the time to be sexually aroused, Sam" chided Integra.
"Too late for that."
"Incoming!" shouted Seras pointing to three sand mallets that sent the Hunters sprawling in to the sand. Using their swords proved to be useless because every time the swords connected with Sandy she just disintegrated into sand. Projectiles such as bullets and crossbow bolts went right through her as well. However, Sandy's blows proved to be quite deadly and solid.
"What kind of magic is this? I thought our swords negated magic."
"This is not magic" stated Bahamut; "This is just her ability, there is no spells involved." The Wyvern blew a large stream of fire at Sandy, but she opened a large hole in her body and the flames sailed right through. Sandy cackled; "You three will meet the fate as the rest before you." Things did not look good for the Hunters as Sandy wrapped them up in sand coffins, with only their heads showing. "Now which one shall I devour first?"
"Not me" wailed Seras "I am young. I have much to live for."
"You have such beautiful eyes" purred Sandy stroking Seras' face softly. Looking over at Integra, Sandy said; "So do you, Sir Morsel."
"Are you going to kill us or stare at our eyes, you sack of dry dirt?" scoffed Integra. Sandy scowled at the Hunter's remark; "Well I guess, I'll eat the blond first."
"Umm do you mean Sir Integra?"
"No, you, your eyes are far prettier than hers."
"All this girl on girl is getting me kinda hot and bothered" said Sam. "How about we deal with that before you eat Seras?"
"Are you actually propositioning the dirt witch, Sam!?"
"Ignore her, she's just a dry old prune."
Sandy was in bind, no one's ever asked to have sex with her before she ate them, oh well she wasn't about to be picky. Just then it began to rain, a freak thunder shower. Sandy looked up at the sky and howled; "NOOOO! You ladies are lucky, I will have to wait until another time." As the sand witch began to disappear into the sand, Integra grabbed the discarded crossbow and fired it. A bolt struck Sandy's shoulder and she screamed in pain, but was gone.
"So that's her weakness."
"What is?" asked Seras. "Why did shooting her work now?"
"Water is her weakness. Water negates her sand abilities."
"That was a close call" remarked Sam.
Seras nodded in agreement; "I'm glad for the rain."
"I wonder how the King is to take it when he hears that one of his Hunters propositioned the monster."
"That was part of my plan, Integra."
Integra burst out into laughter while Sam and Seras gave her curious looks. When she composed herself, Integra said; "I'm sorry I thought I heard Sam say it was part of her 'plan'".
"Well it was…"
"As you so often love to say, 'Yeah whatever'. Now let's go, I have to wash this grit out of my hair and then write one hell of a report."
Seras looked at the assassin, the scowl she wore on her face was one of pure hate. She looked like she wanted to kill Integra. Integra could feel Sam's glare on her, let her glare until her bloody eyeballs fall out. Part of her plan…pfft and while Sam and the dirt witch were rutting, what was she and Seras supposed to do, commentate? Yeah, the King would love to see that in the report.
Whitehall was pissed, that was not a strong enough word for how he felt. Nothing was going according to plan. He had started putting together the workings of a scheme and it would have been put into action if not for the rumors about his involvement in the Hunter family massacre, but they were whispered and the whisperers would soon disappear, but now they were being screamed from the rooftops. It was because in the last couple of months the King's Hunters had become popular, extremely popular. Victoria volunteered her time at the orphanage, the animal shelter and hospital. She also found time to help the London Metropolitan Police with cases and was made an officer. Hellsing gained new business ventures overseas and opened a Women's Shelter. And McClaren, well Whitehall had no clue what she did, but that didn't matter. Since now people knew how much he hated the Hunters, if something should happen to them, they would know immediately. Whitehall's daughter Virginia had come home crying several days ago, apparently the Astons were holding a gala and Lady Aston had told her outright that she was not invited because her father was a murderer. "Tell me, that's not true!" sobbed Virginia. "You wouldn't kill people over some silly swords, would you father?" George had wanted to slap her for that. The ignorant girl knew nothing about the swords. He had told his children numerous times about their illustrious past. But to placate his daughter, he lied; "Of course not dear, I would never do something so heinous for the blades. I will talk to Lord Aston and clear things up." This pleased Virginia, but he never got around to doing it because his sons also grew tired of hearing about the swords. They had money, power and prestige. "Why would we give that up for some rusty sword?" asked Andrew, the eldest son. The other sons had agreed and said they could care less about swords and Joseph the youngest even said that perhaps his father made up the story of the fourth sword, after all if there was a fourth sword, where was it? Lost in the ocean sounded a bit too convenient. Lord Whitehall could only stare in disbelief, his family had betrayed him. How? For what? Who had turned them from this glorious path? It was most likely Hellsing, but she had clearly made it known that she was not interested in talking to the Whitehalls. However, that did not exempt her. Also with all the rumors going around, his family were probably trying to distance themselves from him. Trying to attain the Demon blades had been a life work, since his own father was alive. George had promised his father while he was on his deathbed that he would make the Whitehalls a Hunter family, but everything was unraveling. Maybe he should have included his family more into the business, instead of outside forces. Speaking of outside forces, the men who were supposed to have dealt with the Victoria's were gone and Richard Hellsing had vanished, no one knew where he was. All of this. Lord Whitehall was reflecting on when his carriage stopped and was surrounded by a large group of men on horseback, hooting and hollering and making such unruly noises. "What is the meaning of this?" Whitehall bellowed at his driver.
"I believe we are being robbed, Sir" answered the driver. Whitehall armed guards tried to fight the bandits off, but were outnumbered and soon they were overpowered. The bandits tied the guards to several trees and took their horses. The leader of the bandits approached the carriage and said with a thick French accent; "If you would just hand over all of your coins, you will leave unhurt."
"You think I carry around money on me, when brigands like you can steal it!?"
"We are not 'brigands', we are the Wild Geese." The whole group started their noises making again.
"I could care less who you are, untie my men and let me leave! I will be sure to report this!"
"You can leave once we get your money."
Just then several men forced open the doors and dragged Lord Whitehall out of his carriage. They also grabbed the driver, who didn't even try to resist. The bandits tore apart the carriage looking for hidden compartments, they gave a loud cheer when they found two large boxes nestled in one of the compartments.
"No! You can't take that! I am a close friend to the King, he will hear of this!" The bandits just laughed as they opened the boxes and saw that they were filled with gold coins.
"Well that's a lot of coins, ya got there, King's friend. I'm sure you wouldn't mind sharing."
"You can't have that!"
"Don't worry, monsieur it'll be put to good use." As added insult, the Wild Geese also took the carriage horses and all the shoes of the Whitehall entourage and rode off laughing. This was NOT George's day. With no horses, the guards, after they were untied, were forced to act as such and pull the carriage to the police station, so Lord Whitehall could make his report. When he arrived at the station, he demanded to speak to the chief right away instead of an officer. He saw Seras and demanded; "Where is Chief Goddard Pemberton?"
"He's talking to someone important" was Seras' answer.
"I highly doubt that whoever it is, is as important as I am!" He stormed into the chief's office and saw the last person he wanted to see, pointing a revolver in face.
"Lord Whitehall, Sir Hellsing and I are in the middle of something important!" exclaimed Chief Pemberton.
"That can wait, I was robbed!"
"I can tell" smirked Integra, putting the revolver away.
Whitehall glared at her; "How? Girl, if you had something to do with it…."
"You're more irate than usual, your clothes are tousled and you seem to be trying to start a new fashion statement."
"What? Fashion statement?"
Integra pointed at the aristocrat's feet; "I don't think the no-shoes thing is going to catch on." The chief looked over at Whitehall and asked; "Where are your shoes?"
"I told you, I was robbed by a group of bandits. They called themselves some kind of bird, the Rabid Ducks or some nonsense."
"The Wild Geese" corrected Pemberton. "They fashion themselves in some way after Robin Hood, robbing rich people and giving their money to the less fortunate."
"Don't say that like it's a good thing! They robbed me! They took my money, shoes and even the carriage horses!"
At this Integra chuckled; "So you had your guards pull the carriage all the way here?"
"Was I supposed to walk?"
"If you wanted to advertise your new fashion trend better."
"Do you find some amusement in this, Sir Hellsing?"
"Yes, I do." As the heiress was leaving, Lord Whitehall saw her say something to Seras, who looked back at him or better yet, his feet and started giggling. Lord Whitehall swore he would find those bandits and make them regret that they ever crossed paths with him!
Hellsing Estate
Sam sat on the sitting room couch bored out of her brain. "A big place like this and nothing to do" she muttered. She had gone to the firing range to release some pent-up stress, but soon tired of that. She was curious about the basement, but remembered what Walter said about going down there. Sam also recalled that Integra said there were bodies down there. The assassin would not be surprised if that was true. Talk about skeletons in the closets. The front door opened and Integra and Seras walked in.
"Sam, my office, now"
"Are we going to have a three-way?'
"No."
When the three Huntresses were in Integra's office, she lit up a cigar and said; "By the orders of the King, the London Police will be starting an investigation on Lord George Whitehall and his involvement of the massacre of the Hunter families." Both Sam and Seras' mouths dropped open.
"That's what Chief Pemberton were talking about before he stormed in?" asked Seras
"Yes, the rumors that Whitehall tried to keep hidden has come to surface, thanks to you Seras."
"Wait….me?"
"What did she do?"
"Well Sam, Seras' 'playing with brats' as you so crassly call it, has gained her the popularity of the people. Some people have requested an investigation be opened. So, your idea of getting to know the people wasn't such a bad idea after all."
"Really? That's awesome!"
"That's all cute and shit, but what's the catch?" asked Sam impatiently. Integra took a long drag from her cigar and blew out a stream of smoke before saying; "Even though you help the police in some of their investigations, Seras, you are not to have anything to do with this one."
"What!? Why not? I know what the men who killed my parents look like!"
"The police will have questions to ask you, as a matter of fact they will have questions to ask all of us. But the Chief though it would be better to have objective minds for this case."
"I assume, you're going to know information about this case, right?"
"Never assume Sam, you'll just make an ass out of yourself. And no, though the Chief would have allowed me that privilege, I requested that he didn't give me that information until the investigation is over."
The office because very quiet. It was most likely that during this investigation, Whitehall couldn't be able to move around as freely as he thought. But if he was as cunning as they said, then there should be no evidence to be found. All the killing he had ordered was done without the rest of his family knowing, so there could be no one flip on him. And those who did the actual killing were dead themselves, no longer alive to tell tales of his heinous crimes.
"This investigation is just a waste of time" sighed Sam.
"You don't get to decide that."
"They'll search his house for anything sort of evidence" said Seras.
"Oh, come on, the man had more than ten years to get rid of evidence, what's to find?"
Integra smirked; "An important rule of war is to know your enemy. 'If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle'"
"Ah Sun Tzu's Art of War" said Walter. Integra rolled her eyes at Sam and Seras' confused looks, but said "Whitehall likes two things: writing and trophies."
"So, he'll will most likely have something belonging to our families in his house!" said Seras catching on.
"But he would not be stupid to keep it there, he will probably also destroy any writings."
"You just want to be a downer, don't you Sam?"
"I'm just being realistic, Seras"
Placing a folder on her desk, Integra said; "Well he can't destroy what he doesn't have.
"What are these?" Sam took one of the sheets. After reading one, the assassin asked; "Who's Richard Hellsing?"
"My uncle."
According to the letter Sam had read, it looked as if the Hellsing was in on the plot, to not only kill his own family, but to help in anyway in the destruction of the other Hunter families. "So where is this uncle of yours?"
"He's dead."
Seras sighed; "There's not really much we can do, so we might as well focus on something we can do." They still haven't been able to come up with an idea on how to defeat Sandy the Sand witch. While they knew that water was her weakness, there was no safe way to bring water to her patch of desert in the woods. They couldn't wait for another unexpected rain shower. While the Hunters were trying to figure out their sand witch problem, Whitehall was trying to wrap his head around the shocking piece of information the police chief Pemberton just gave him; by order of the King, there was to be an investigation on him, by request of the people, though the chief said that one person was extremely persistent about it. "WAS IT SIR INTEGRA?!" bellowed the stunned noble. He had seen her in the office talking to the chief.
"I cannot tell you that. If this person wants to make it known to you, they are free to tell you this themselves."
This was a most horrid day! When Whitehall returned home to his wife and fumed; "Not only have I been robbed of good horses and my money, but those bandits had the nerves to steal my shoes! And on top of that, that slag Hellsing has requested that there an investigation on me! Can you believe that?!"
"Yes George, I can believe that" sighed Marionne Whitehall. She had been married to George for over twenty years and all he ever obsessed about was about those damn demon blades. It had become so bad that even in his sleep he coveted them. "I am tired of hearing about those bloody swords! For years that is all I hear. You can't even touch them, so why do you want them? Your obsession over these swords are unbearable, first it was your grandfather, then your father and now you. This must stop! We, Whitehalls are a family of nobility, we should be ruling the country not bowing to anyone! It was not Sir Hellsing that requested an investigation, it was I" George could only stare at his wife in astonishment, his mouth hanging wide open. "You? You betrayed me?"
"If that is what you are calling it. Yet you have betrayed the great Whitehall name, by killing for mere tools of servitude. I have found several people who are willing to testify against you."
"You bitch! Lies! There is no one left alive who knows what happened! You will pay for this slander! You will pay for this betrayal." At that moment, the police walked in, one of the officers said; "Lord George Whitehall, you are to come with us."
"What? Why?"
"We are taking you into custody to ensure that you don't try to escape or tamper with evidence. And don't forget to put on shoes."
Chapter End
Author's Notes: First I want to say sorry for the long hiatus, I got distracted again and lazy. I have about four chapters after this one written. Also, someone had requested a Hellsing/Black Lagoon crossover and I had to plan for that as well. So, you have that to look forward. So, Whitehall's own wife rats on him, well that was to be expected since he's a douche. I came up with the idea of having his shoes stolen from some show on OWN. Also read the book The Art of War by Sun Tzu, it's good. And don't worry about Sandy, I have a great way for the Huntresses to dispose of her. And you guys got to meet Pip and the Wild Geese. What will happen to Sandy? Will we see more of Pip and his crew of bandits? All these questions will be answered in the next chapter! I promise to be timelier with my chappies! See you in the next chapter!
