Where Two Stand
Screwed Up Together
Chapter 12
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Man, aren't we one screwed up pair of human beings. I am beginning to think that we are so screwed up that we have passed outside the boundaries were professional help would be of any benefit to us.
The reality though might be we have been far beyond that help way before Gunther came along and screwed our lives up more.
But if we have to be screwed up then at least we are screwed up together. At least we are alive and we can continue to screw up each other's lives until we grow old and die happy or kill each other. Whichever comes first I don't really care, because the alternative is much worse – being screwed up and alone. Been there done that and I don't want to do that again.
And if we are beyond help then we need to at least slow the process down. We can start by putting the guilt where it belongs- on Gunther's shoulders. We need to put it there and leave it, washing our hands of it. It is too big for you and I to carry together much less alone. If we don't do that Starsk, in the end it will crush us and do what Gunther, Kira and all the others have tried to do in the past. Destroy our friendship. If that is even possible after all we have been through.
I am not willing to find out if that could happen and I know you feel the same way. When it comes done to it Starsk, nothing could have prevented what happened. Your actions no more put us here than mine did. Gunther alone is responsible, his choices put us here.
We all have choices, sure we can't control the choices others make, but we have control over how they affect us, how we react to them. We can let it destroy us or we can destroy it.
The reality is all the "what if's" can't changed it. So there is no reason to waste our energy on what might have been.
Ha! Who am I kidding? That is so much easier said than done. But it sounds nice doesn't?
Either way I know we would rather be screwed up together than screwed up and alone.
