Chapter 9
Alex took her seat again looking between Wendy and Nathan confused and just a little angered. As far as she was concerned, the captain was verging on treating Sam as a prisoner not an innocent pulled into something she had no control over. Lucas did too. Something was up, with everyone but the four of them in the room, the muted lighting and the imposing table between them conspired to give Alex and Lucas the feeling of something ominous hanging in the air like morning fog.
"What's going on Captain?" Lucas asked a beat before Alex could ask the same question. Bridger filled himself a cup of coffee and offered the pot to anyone who would like a refill of their own before sitting down across from them next to Wendy. Lucas waved him off politely and Alex was too focused on Bridger to accept one way or another.
"Well, Sam woke up a few hours ago. Wendy says she seems to be fine from a medical standpoint but she seems to be acting very odd. Since Wendy can't give me any explanation, I wanted to ask you if this is normal behavior for her," he replied looking directly at Alex.
"I don't know if I can or not. I thought we discussed this last night and you thought things were fine. What do you mean by odd?" Alex asked truly confused. Nathan looked at Wendy for an answer.
"I did but this just goes a little beyond fear induced catatonia. When she woke up, she seemed fine. But about an hour later, after I had run all the scans I thought were necessary and not one of them showed anything abnormal and I couldn't feel anything out of place from her, she suddenly changed personalities. At first she had been rather subdued, almost frightened and then she went into a yelling rage over her breakfast not being what she wanted. As quickly as she'd done it she was back to being subdued again. She didn't seem to even register what she had done," Wendy explained. Alex's eyebrows had risen steadily through it all and the look on her face told all of them that this was not something she would have expected from Samantha.
"No, that's not normal for her. I guess it could just be the stress. Sam is about as laid back and easy going as they come under normal circumstances," she said her look of confusion sliding into one of deep concern.
"I'm sure whatever it is Dr. Smith can figure it out," Lucas said squeezing her shoulder reassuringly.
"I wish I could agree with you Lucas. But nothing I've done has given me any reason to think there is anything wrong with her. It could just be the stress, post-traumatic stress manifests differently in different people but I can't read anything that suggests that from her. It was more like she was two different people for that one second. If I wasn't an empath I probably would have written it off as stress too," Wendy corrected him gently.
"Maybe if I talk to her. She's probably scared out of her mind," Alex reasoned. Nathan nodded in agreement with her before he spoke.
"Maybe, but I have to ask this. How long have you known her? Do you think there is any chance she could be involved in this somehow? I don't honestly think she has anything to do with it but I can't take that chance," he said as kindly as he could. Alex shook her head emphatically.
"No. I've worked with her for six months. There is no way she would be involved in this. Her psych profile is on file with the UEO, her security clearance is one below mine. Check for yourself. There's no way, that's just not the kind of person Sam is," Alex insisted. Bridger held his hands up in surrender.
"Alright, I just want to be sure. Something about all this just doesn't sit right with me and I want to make sure I've got all our bases covered. I have to make sure her behavior isn't a clever cover for her involvement," he confessed.
"I have the feeling you're right. Something isn't right even given the circumstances. But Sam has nothing to do with it. I'm certain of that," Alex admitted.
"I have the same feeling," Wendy agreed with a deep sigh.
"The question is what is it...or who?" Lucas voiced. Every head in the room looked at him; he had summed it up for them all.
"That, Lucas is the million dollar question," Bridger said.
#**#
As soon as they exited the ward room Alex made a bee line for the medical bay, moving at something just under an outright run. Lucas actually had to trot to keep up with her for a change. Her face was set in a muddled expression of worry, concern, anger and a determination to find out exactly what was going on and why.
"Going to see Samantha?" he said voicing the obvious to break the silence as they headed for the nearest maglev entrance.
"Yes. I want to make sure she's alright. She looked like a frightened kitten stuck in a storm drain earlier. I also want to find out who is doing this and why and I want to know now. I've had it up to here with people assuming they can just waltz all over whomever they please," she spat, one hand marking the height of up to here at the top of her skull.
"They do whatever they want without any regard for the lives they affect!" she growled her near run slowing to an angry stalk. Lucas's eyes widened, he hadn't expected that vehement an outburst from her. He reached out and caught her arm, bringing her to a halt.
"Is this about Sam or you Alex? You seem just a little more bent out of shape about this than I expected," he asked, locking blue eyes with green ones, daring her to deny what he suspected to be true. She looked down and away briefly before responding with a sigh.
"No... Yes... I don't know. Yes it's about her and yes it's about me. I'm tired of it Lucas. Tired of being the one who ends up thrown into the middle of whatever crisis someone else manages to create and watching it tear my life in two. Tired of watching others be drug into it with me. Tired of being the reason people can't just go about their normal lives. Tired of being the reason someone else's life is torn in two," she admitted with a tone that spoke volumes. It sounded exhausted. Not physically exhausted but tired of picking up the pieces of a broken life again and again.
Lucas's eyes softened and he squeezed her arms reassuringly, lowering his stance so his eyes were looking directly into hers rather than down into them.
"You didn't ask for this. It's not your fault you've ended up in the middle of all this. Whatever is going on we'll figure it out. We always do. We got through Sanborn together; we'll get through this together. Me, the captain, the whole crew, we're here for you. You aren't alone in this. And if things get torn apart along the way we'll just put the pieces back together again." he told her. She rolled her eyes in frustration.
"That's the point Lucas. I shouldn't have to have other people putting my life back together for me. That's my job. I cannot pull other people down with me every time I end up in another mess. When I let that happen I just do to them the same thing that's been done to me." she explained. Lucas shook his head at her in disbelief.
"You'd do it for me wouldn't you? You'd do it for any of your friends. I know you would." he insisted and for a moment her expression faltered.
"I... Of course I would for you Lucas. That's not what I mean...I don't have any friends. It wouldn't be fair to them, it's not fair to you." she blurted before her brain could still her tongue. From the mortified expression that crossed her face he knew she had said more than she had intended.
"Fair to me? What are you talking about? You have more friends than you think Alex," he started to reason with her but she cut him off abruptly.
"Can we just... can we talk about this later? We have more important problems right now," she pleaded.
"Alex..." he protested, feeling like he was on the brink of winning that battle he'd been fighting for a year and half or at least finding out why he hadn't been able to win it to begin with. She set her mouth in a taut line and he knew he'd lost this round.
"Just drop it. Please?" she insisted her voice softer and more forgiving than he had thought it would be. Her eyes flickered away as if she were afraid to meet his gaze. On an impulse, he turned her head back to face him with one finger under her chin.
"Sweetheart..." he tried again. She just shook her head gently.
"No, Lucas." she reaffirmed sadly and without giving him time to formulate a rebuke she turned and walked down the corridor into the maglev as if the conversation had never happened. Leaving him to catch up or be left behind.
