"So HE decided that since he put a ring on it she was just going wherever he was and SHE spent the night with some rando and went home and broke it off the next day? That the general gist?" Josh's eyebrows furrowed as he tried to process everything Maya had told him in the past half hour while chopping vegetables together. He liked to pretend he was a good multi-tasker but often times he got distracted by a stray lock of hair or the curve of her waist or literally anything when he looked toward her.
"Not a rando and apparently it was Heehaw's idea."
"So they're idiots. Wife, why are we having idiots over for dinner?" Josh laughed.
"Idiot. Singular not plural and you talk about my best friend that way and I'll deck ya," She shook her first theatrically at him.
He laughed before pulling her close, "Oooh, feisty," he grinned before planting a big wet smooch on her lips.
"Since the day I was born." She shook her head smiling as wide as her face would allow her to. They kissed again, this time more deeply; their tongues exploring the depths of one another's mouths. Maya let out a small sigh against Josh before she reached up grabbing a handful of his hair. His hands moved to her hips and picked her up to sit her on the kitchen counters. Without taking their lips off of one another's, Maya wrapped her legs around Josh as his mouth moved to her collarbone. His hands moved from her waist up her back, and slipped under her top. Between gasps and moans, she felt his hands approach her bra clasp and she forced the words out of her mouth, "Baby,"
"Hmm?" He replied, not even pausing what he was doing.
"Onions," she gasped. He pulls away and nods at her, "onions" he says before pulling his shirt off over his head.
Continuing kissing her neck, his lips moved farther and farther down her neck. Maya did not even realize when her bra had been unhooked. How did he always do that? She tried to not feel his skin on hers and how electric it felt and keep her thoughts clear. "Baby!"
"What?!" Josh pulled away annoyed.
"Your onions," Maya said equally annoyed, pointing at the frying pan of now charred onions on the stovetop.
"Oh…. well you coulda said something Maya!" he accused jokingly. He turned off the stove and frowned at the wasted food. It was just an onion but he hadn't wanted to cook in the first place and the discouragement wasn't helping. All the prep work was done he supposed.
"Hey, I ain't the one trying to set the house on fire." Maya frowned seeing Josh's sad face. "What'sa matter honey?"
"I don't feel like cooking tonight. I don't want to entertain. I wanna be lazy with you."
"You don't have to cook but we can't just stay in and fuck all the time. We have to be social sometimes and we gotta eat. I don't know about you, but I sure gotta eat. Okay?" Maya cajoled.
"Okay…" Josh pouted. "I guess it has been a while since we've seen just Riley."
"She needs us." Maya said reaching back and rehooking her bra under her shirt.
"Speaking of just Riley, how was breakfast? Just like old times?" Maya frowned at her husband's question.
"Uh… sort of…" Maya's voice trailed off, "It wasn't just her and she's hurting pretty bad so she didn't really seem herself."
"What do you mean?"
"Well, I basically had to drag her and Farkle out of the apartment to breakfast and we all talked plenty but it wasn't like she was there, ya know? Like her mind was someplace else." Josh pretended not to hear the slight scoff when Maya said Farkle's name.
"Well like you said she's hurting, I mean how would you feel if you lost someone you've spent almost half your life with?" Maya mumbled something unintelligible under her breath.
"Okay what? Do we hate Farkle now?" Josh asked confused, trying to piece together his wife's obvious discontent.
"No, it's just… he's the rando you know? She's spent the last two nights with him and it's just… I don't know I just think there's something hinky about it!" Josh narrowed his eyes at her still not understanding.
"Oh. OOOH." Josh said finally understanding, his eyes widening. Josh suddenly looked at her with disbelief, "You really think she's doing the Minkus kid?"
"Well no but it's only a matter of time, look at the guy," Maya blurted.
"Okay I don't wanna know what THAT means but I think you're being kinda cranky because someone's spending time with your best friend and that's not sitting right with you." Josh raised his voice at her unintentionally and she glared at him.
Cranky. That was a euphemism her and Josh used when they went to their work functions together and commented on other's behavior while people-watching. He thought she was being a bitch and regardless of the fact Maya knew she was indeed being a bitch because she was jealous, she had to counter because now that's what they were doing. Fighting.
"Well I'd rather be a bitch than a lazy, horny shut-in." Maya spat.
"Well you're obviously very capable of being both, aren't you?" Josh spat back throwing his hands in the air.
"Well if I'm a shut in it's thanks to you and you seem to have no problems with my libido other than this one incidence and as far as lazy is concerned…"
"Oh, here we go…" Josh rolled his eyes.
"No. You know what, I won't even say it because you already fucking know and I am not a nag." Maya left the kitchen and plopped herself onto the couch. She muttered to herself angrily and crossed her arms.
"I can hear you!" Josh shouted childishly from the kitchen.
"Oh yeah? What am I saying?"
"Well for one if you're gonna call me an asshole at least do it to my face,"
"Lucky guess pretty boy…" Maya huffed.
"It was, wasn't it?" Josh mused cheerfully to himself.
"What are you so happy about?" Maya glared as she made her way back to the kitchen.
"Well for one, my wife thinks I'm pretty so there's that…" Josh smirked. Maya's glare melted into a pout. He pulled her into a hug. "You're an awful insult giver, you know that?" He kissed the top of her head.
"I wasn't trying very hard. I was only angry you called me a bitch."
"I did not." he answered indignantly.
"Cranky?" Maya raised an eyebrow.
"Shit I did, didn't I?" He sighed, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it."
"No you did, that's okay though. You're not a horny lazy shut-in."
"Yeah I am and guess what?" He grinned.
"What?" She smirked at his contagious smile.
"You're the big dummy that married me." She kissed him and then gave him a devilish smile, "Wanna go make up?" Maya wiggled her eyebrows at her man.
"As much as I'd love to, I don't think we have that kind of time before the niece shows up."
"As much as you'd love to what?" Riley shouted from the doorway throwing her purse onto the table next to it. "Actually I probably don't want to know," She scrunched her face in disgust.
"Why do we even have locks? I just… I can't understand." Josh muttered.
Maya went to hug Riley and asked earnestly, "How are you?"
"I'm fabulous," Riley lied, grinning probably too big. She could not and would not mention that she had actually arrived over a half an hour ago and stood outside their paper thin walls awkwardly as they fought because of her. She would not bring up the fact that she fought with herself as to whether she even wanted to do this. Smiling was exhausting. Leaving Farkle's apartment had been exhausting. Hell, even gathering the strength to greet the happy couple had tuckered her out. Tears threatened her eyes again as she remembered what a burden she felt like. If not for Maya's pity for her, her and Josh could be alone together and they'd be happy. She tried to think of how to be the least annoying version of herself right now and came up empty. She wanted Maya to hug her again and not let go so she could just cry. No words or food or pleasantries involved.
"Could I borrow your wife for a second?" Riley asked before pulling Maya away.
"Peaches," Riley started sweetly as they stepped out of earshot.
"Yeah?" Maya asked, slightly nervous.
"I just wanted to say formally, congratulations and welcome to being a Matthews, isn't it the best?" She said pulling a small envelope with a red bow on it out of her pocket.
"It's alright," Maya pretended not to care. Despite her nonchalance, her eyes began to twinkle the minute Riley pulled the envelope out.
"Just alright?" Riley faked a frown and began to put the envelope back in her pocket.
"Okay okay, it's the best! My favorite people are Matthews and now I'm one and when Josh calls me Mrs. Matthews around family your dad does that thing where he gets all red and goes GRRR." Maya spoke quickly and laughed. "Now gimme gimme gimme!" She snatched the envelope from Riley's pocket.
"I'm pretty sure if you called him brother-in-law, his head might actually burst." Riley laughed as Maya's eyes grew wide at the contents of the envelope. She pulled out two slips of paper.
"Riles…." Maya started, "What did you…?" Tears filled her eyes as she saw her and Josh's names on two airline vouchers.
"Paris. You did still wanna go right?" Riley smiled as Maya tried to form a coherent sentence.
"We couldn't possibly accept this." Maya shook her head, trying to gulp down the lump in her throat.
"Of course you can, you're my aunt now. I doubt with the amount you two have been working you've properly honeymooned and I'm not the only Matthews with some serious wanderlust, I can't be. You're an artist and you can..." Riley's rambling was cut off by Maya pulling her into a hug.
"I don't know how you did this but thank you." Maya sniffed back what was the beginning of a loose tear.
"I love you. I want you guys to have all the happiness you deserve." Riley's eyes were misty too, but she was not quite as good at sniffing them back.
When they returned to Josh they both smiled as big as their faces would allow and their arms were linked.
"Well aren't you two a sight for sore eyes, why are we all smiley?"
"You're taking me to Paris!" Maya shouted as she jumped on Josh's back.
"I'm doing what now?" He asked as he plopped down on the couch, effectively crushing his petite wife. Over the years he'd learn to combat her surprise piggyback rides.
"HONEYMOON!" Maya shouted excitedly.
"Baby you know I'd love to take you but we can't afford to right now… Maybe after a little saving and some overtime…." his voice began to trail off until Maya began waving the airline vouchers in his face.
"It's a wedding gift," Riley interjected. "And I know you both were really excited about cooking for me but I was thinking maybe instead of something so formal, we could do tacos and binge watch something on Netflix instead?"
Josh began brooding. The house smelled like burnt onions and garlic, he knew his niece was protecting his feelings but she was the type that always wanted to go out and do things. 'We have to go experience life!' she would say before pulling them out of the house. This wasn't like her.
"I don't want tacos." Maya said. Josh and Riley gasped, mouths agape. They looked at one another and back at Maya. Riley quickly rushed to her blonde best friend and put a hand up to her forehead.
"Does she feel warm?" Josh asked, feigning concern.
"She's gotta get to bed STAT." Riley returned the look.
"Ha ha." Maya deadpanned. "Pizza?"
"Nah." Josh replied.
"I'm actually not that hungry, I had a super late lunch and I mostly just came over to see you guys. Have whatever you want, I'm probably gonna head out soon."
"But you just got here!" Maya argued.
"I know, I know. I'm the worst but I have one hell of a stomach ache. I'm gonna go have a lie down. I love you guys, I'm sorry I haven't been around much I just need some time to like recharge, ya know?" Riley said grabbing her bag from the front table.
"Wait, where are you staying? You can lie down here." Josh tried to reason.
"I'm… actually staying somewhere." Riley tried to keep vague but she could tell the two would not drop it. "I remember college you guys, I really don't wanna hear those noises again."
Riley kissed them both on the cheek and turned back toward the door before Maya grabbed her by the hand. "Not so fast." She dragged her back to the sofa. "We don't have a bay window but we're sure as hell having a conversation, your uncle too. Sit." Both Josh and Riley obeyed.
"We're worried about you. We miss you." Maya said.
"I'm good. I've just been busy. The trip is coming up and lots of loose ends, you know?" Riley smiled and avoided eye contact. "And don't go all concerned elder on me, it's weird."
"Okay, I'll try. Where are you staying?" Maya asked sternly.
"Me and Zay are switching apartments for a little while. I'm safe. It's temporary, I took an earlier leave date so it's REALLY temporary. Okay?" Riley's eyes pleaded with Maya to not press the matter.
"Okay." Maya sighed. "Hey,"
"Yeah?" Riley replied.
"You'll find me when you're ready to talk, right?" Riley had never been one to deny herself feeling and this facade of being alright was genuinely scaring Maya more than she'd care to admit.
Riley smiled a soft, recognizably sad smile and nodded, "You bet Peaches."
Author's Note: GRR! I know you guys are reviewing but nothing is showing up and some of your more detailed reviews (lookin at you ShannonCrystal, my literal favorite) I can't read in their entirety. Super frustrating!
