A/N: Hey guys, just wanted to thank you all for all the amazing/positive reviews and all of the story favourites/Kudos' I've received for this. I'm so glad that you're all enjoying reading this as much as I'm genuinely enjoying writing it and I'm eternally grateful xxx

Nathan groaned in frustration as he heaved a particularly heavy box through the lift door and looked up to the sound of Simon laughing at him from across the room.

He left the box on the floor and stalked over to him, eyebrow raised.

"Are you laughing at me?" He asked.

Simon did his best to stifle the grin that was plastered across his face. "No, I'm laughing with you, trust me."

Nathan spared him a glance before he turned around to the box that was lying on the floor.

"Is that the last one?" Simon asked.

Nathan shook his head.

"No, there's one more at the top of the lift, then I'm done."

Simon rolled his eyes as he walked past Nathan and towards the lift door.

"How much stuff do you have?" He joked.

"Honestly, I'm just as surprised as you are!" Nathan called after him before he heard the lift door slide shut.

He walked around the kitchen counter and opened the fridge, pulling two cans of drink from the cooler at the bottom.

He rolled his eyes. Coolers.

He leant against the counter as Simon struggled to reopen the door whilst simultaneously holding a large cardboard box in one arm.

"You could help me, you know." He puffed out.

"I could." Nathan agreed, opening his can loudly.

Simon groaned as he struggled through the door and left the box next to the one Nathan had strewn across the floor.

He rubbed his hands together as if getting imaginary dirt off of them.

Nathan held the other can out to Simon as he approached him. Simon thanked him and took a swig, using his free hand to unbutton the first few buttons of his shirt.

Nathan smiled discreetly to himself as he watched the innocent yet monumental movement. This, living together, all of the little things. It occurred to Nathan that he finally had the chance to experience the beginning of their relationship, the 'falling in love' bit.

Nathan placed his can down and moved off to the two discarded boxes by the lift, he knelt down next to them and opened them up, scanning the items inside and deciding where he should put them.

Around half an hour later, he was done packing his things away and he allowed himself one small breath. He had moved in. He and Simon now lived together, officially lived together as a real couple.

The thought made him feel strangely giddy and he worked hard to expel the colour from his face before he turned on his heel and walked back to the main area of the flat.

Simon was sat on the edge of the bed, absent-mindedly lifting one of the weights that had been left there, more like he was testing the weight out in his hands than doing any actual reps.

Nathan watched a small bulge at his bicep surface every time he brought the weight up and leant against the wall, arms folded.

Simon caught sight of Nathan's frame casually watching him.

"What?" He asked, looking over to the Irish man.

Nathan shook his head. "Nothing, aren't I allowed to appreciate my sexy boyfriend every now and then?"

Simon looked tentatively down at the weight in his hand as if he wasn't sure what to do with it.

"Was he very muscular?" He questioned.

Nathan racked his brains for a moment, finding it difficult to conjure up a picture of Simon without the customary twinge of pain that accompanied the memories.

"I suppose." He finally decided. "But, you know, you're not completely off."

Simon looked down at himself again momentarily before pushing his sleeves up his arms.

Nathan allowed himself to flop onto the bed, he angled his head to the side and watched as Simon continued to lift the weight in his arm.

In that moment, everything suddenly felt exactly like it did before. But then at the same time completely different.

Nathan shook his head, wishing he could just decide on one emotion and stick to it. He hated this constant blurring between the present, the past and the future.

He just wanted everything to be okay.

Nathan found himself getting slowly to his feet and walking over to Simon. Simon looked up to see Nathan stood in front of him, reaching a hand out. His eyes looked strangely hooded.

"Would you like to come to bed?" He asked quietly.

Not taking his eyes off of Nathan, Simon slowly lowered his weights to the ground.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

Nathan retracted his hand and pulled his shirt over his head, throwing it unceremoniously across the floor. That was explanation enough.

Simon stood quickly, far too quickly, hands stuck at his sides.

"I...err..." He stuttered, causing Nathan to smile internally. "I haven't ever actually..."

Nathan's smile surfaced as Simon's cheeks turned rosy and his eyes were concentrated on the ground. Nathan wasn't exactly sure what had changed but he knew that he was exactly where he wanted to be.

"It's okay." He said softly, reaching his hand out to Simon's again. Simon followed Nathan's hands as they gave his a reassuring squeeze before they travelled to the hem of his shirt and teased underneath the soft fabric.

Simon stood, stock still, and allowed Nathan to slowly unbutton his shirt and ease it from his body.

It made a soft thud sound as the fabric hit the floor but Simon was too mesmerised to notice.

He leant in experimentally and kissed Nathan softly on the lips and heard Nathan utter a little sigh in response.

Nathan grabbed Simon's hand again and pulled him forward until his legs hit the side of the bed and he collapsed down onto it, pulling Simon crashing down with him.

The pair laughed at the sudden change of direction and Simon felt suddenly at ease, he leant up again and pressed his lips to Nathan's neck, and Nathan shied his face away from such an assault on the sensitive flesh there. Instead, he sneaked his hands down between their bodies and felt around until he came across the zip on Simon's jeans.

He felt Simon's hand on his, stilling his movements, and sighed internally.

Simon's gaze met his.

"Err...which one of us...I mean, who did the...err..."

Nathan found himself concealing a smirk as relief washed over him. He reached out and stroked Simon's cheek, his other hand going back to the other man's zip and inching it down.

"You did." He told him softly, watching as Simon's eyes widened minutely.

Simon nodded and kissed Nathan again, moaning into his mouth when he felt Nathan's hand slip into his underwear and wrap around his already hard cock.

This was the first time anyone other than himself had touched him in that way, the moment felt huge, it felt titanic. He pulled away.

Nathan looked confused.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

Simon dipped his head slightly. "I...I don't want to screw this up." He admitted, causing Nathan to smile again.

"You won't." He assured him, giving him a quick kiss before he rolled over to the side of the bed and opened a drawer, coming back with a condom and a tube of lubricant.

Simon felt his stomach flip in jealousy as he realised that they must have been the items that Nathan and his future self had used but he forced himself to quell the feeling.

"Sit back." Nathan said soothingly, and Simon did. He pulled back and sat on his ankles.

Nathan crawled over to him and helped him ease his jeans off and cast them aside.

Simon reached out experimentally and Nathan allowed him to remove his trousers until the pair were naked and facing each other.

Nathan appreciated just how different this was to his first time with Simon. He got momentarily distracted when it occurred to him that the future Simon had talked about this as if were some other event and now Nathan was actually living it. All of the things Simon had told Nathan would happen in his future seemed to Nathan as if they had already happened. Yet here he was, experiencing them for the first time.

The thought was oddly daunting.

He came back to himself when he felt an oddly cool hand on his cheek, he inclined his head to see Simon looking at him, his eyes were gentle.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked.

Nathan nodded and looked down at the condom in his slightly shaking hands, he watched as Simon's hand came into view and took the item from his grip.

Nathan looked up to see Simon staring down at his own hard member as he ripped the foil packet open and rolled the condom onto himself. Even from this angle, Nathan could see that he looked terrified.

His heart went out to him and he instinctively reached his arms out and pulled him closer, kissing him softly.

Simon responded to the kiss and it seemed to immediately calm him.

"Don't be scared." Nathan whispered when he pulled away. "It's just me."

He gave Simon a reassuring smile as he opened the tube of lubricant and squirted some onto his hand. Simon watched, in interest, as Nathan wrapped his hand around Simon's covered dick and began coating it with the cool substance, instantly causing it to regain some of the hardness it had lost during Simon's turmoil.

Simon bit down onto his lip as he watched Nathan's ministrations, he reached a hand out and grabbed Nathan's wrist, causing him to look up at him.

"Stop." Simon all but commanded. "I'm going to come."

Nathan smirked and retracted his hand.

"Not yet," was all he said as he squirted some more of the lube onto his hand and coated it on his fingers. He spread his legs and Simon, who had come back to himself, figured out what he was going to do.

"Do you want me to...?" He began, but Nathan waved him away.

"No, it's okay. This is your first time, just watch me."

So he did.

Simon watched as Nathan eased his index finger into his hole, watching as the liquid dribbled down onto the bed.

"Fuck..." He said in a low voice as he watched Nathan slip another finger inside of himself.

Simon was caught off guard by a small, whimpering moan and looked up to see Nathan's face, eyes closed and brow furrowed in pleasure.

He realised in that moment that he would never find anyone more beautiful than Nathan in the world.

But just as quickly as the moment appeared, it vanished again. Nathan retracted his hand and slowly opened his eyes, meeting Simon's gaze and smiling again.

"What?" He asked, catching the other man's stare.

"You're perfect." Simon told him, causing Nathan to blush.

"Come here," Nathan commanded, voice low and full of lust. Simon crawled up the bed until he was situated between Nathan's legs. He wrapped his arms around the Irish man's upper body and kissed him, hard, like a man starved of oxygen.

He heard Nathan moan into the kiss and realised that he wanted to be responsible for all of Nathan's pleasure from that moment on.

Nathan shifted until he felt Simon's cock poking against his ass, he tentatively wrapped his legs around Simon's waist and looked up at him.

It was in that moment that Simon appreciated just how scared Nathan looked. Not terrified, not like he didn't want this to happen, but scared that it wasn't going to be anything like he remembered.

Or maybe scared that it was going to be exactly the same.

Without taking his eyes from Nathan's blue orbs, Simon reached down between them and guided his cock forward until he felt it come into contact with Nathan's hole.

Nathan tightened his legs around Simon's waist, effectively pulling him into him.

Simon shuddered and closed his eyes as he felt the tight muscles of Nathan's ass contract around him.

Nathan let out a shallow moan as Simon stilled inside of him.

Breathing heavily, Simon propped himself up on his shoulders and stroked Nathan's hair that was moist with sweat.

"Are you okay?" He asked quietly.

Nathan nodded up at him, attempting to smile. "Yeah, yeah. Just overwhelmed."

Simon nodded. "Do you want me to st...?"

He was cut off by Nathan surging up and kissing him. "You can move." He whispered against Simon's skin.

Simon tried to hide his nervousness. He'd watched porn, he'd seen sex scenes in films, he had to take control.

He pulled back until he was only half inside Nathan before plunging back in shallowly, causing Nathan to let out a small gasp.

He pulled out again and pushed back in, deeper this time.

Simon felt Nathan's legs tighten around his waist, he shuddered slightly and placed his hands on Nathan's hips, attempting to pin the man to the bed but also trying to be gentle enough so as not to bruise him.

Nathan couldn't help but find Simon's ministrations oddly endearing, he was so nervous of his own emotions that he was trying to be hard and gentle at the same time.

Nathan wished he could pull Simon down to him and whisper in his ear that one day he'd be excellent at this, one day he would make Nathan moan and weep and come but he couldn't. He couldn't tell Simon how much better his future self had been.

Simon thought that Nathan didn't notice the way his eyes twinged whenever his future self was brought up but he did.

Nathan lay back as he felt Simon plunge into him again, the burn was very pleasant and made Nathan shudder, and the pleasure pooling at the base of his spine garnered his attentions for a few minutes and he allowed his eyes to close.

He opened them again when he heard a soft moan come from above him and looked up to see Simon's face had gone lax. He smiled to himself.

Simon closed his eyes when he came, the sensation was far more natural than he had thought it would be.

The media made orgasms out to be instant and exploding but he entered into his like the natural progression of water rolling down a stream, and the pleasurable sensations continued on for what felt like several minutes.

When he opened his eyes again, he realised that he was rather exhausted. He looked down to see Nathan smiling sweetly up at him and smiled back in return until he gaze travelled down to Nathan's cock, still hard and straining against his stomach.

He glanced up to Nathan's suddenly worried expression and his smile dropped.

Propping himself up on his elbows a little more, he reached one forearm down and wrapped his hand loosely around Nathan's throbbing member.

He felt Nathan's own hand reach down and ease his away, he looked up to see him smiling reassuringly at him.

"It's okay," he said, "you don't have to do that. I'm okay."

Embarrassed, Simon pulled out of Nathan and turned slightly, perching himself near the edge of the bed.

Staring at the floor, Simon wished away the red blush that was seeping onto his cheeks.

"I bet the other Simon could make you come." He said dejectedly.

There was a beat of silence until Simon heard the bed covers rustle and felt a dip beside him as Nathan joined him at the edge of the bed, wrapping his arms around Simon from behind.

"Practice makes perfect," he whispered all too kindly by Simon's ear. "One day you'll be, you know, just as..."

It was Nathan's kind reassurances that made Simon so angry, because somewhere the in the pit of his stomach he was so cross with himself because he wanted to give Nathan everything yet he couldn't. He wanted Nathan to realise just how useless he actual was.

"I'll never be good enough." Simon snapped, standing so quickly that Nathan fell back onto the bed slightly. "You'll never love me as much as you loved him."

Nathan watched in shock as Simon stalked away from the bed and turned invisible before his eyes.

Feeling anger pooling in his stomach, Nathan reached across the bed and quickly pulled his jeans on. He walked to the middle of the living space and looked around.

"Hey!" He called out, trying not to feel like a fucking idiot for talking to thin air. "What about you, then? You were giving it all that about fulfilling destiny and all that shit, how do I know if you care about me at all? How do I know if you'll ever love me, or if you're just with me because you think you have to be!"

Simon suddenly visualised in front of Nathan, causing him to back off in shock.

"Of course I love you." He said in a hard voice, eyes full of desperation.

Nathan stepped forward again slowly, brain silenced by the sudden declaration.

He watched as Simon's eyes eased to the floor.

"I don't want to live in his shadow." He said softly, glancing back up to Nathan.

Nathan couldn't be angry anymore, he just couldn't. Simon loved him, Simon loved him for the very first time.

"You have to stop thinking about you and the future you as two different people," he said softly, "you're the same person, and I love you. I love you."

Simon stared at Nathan for the longest time, like he was somehow looking past Nathan's eyes and right inside of him.

Simon leant in and pressed a soft kiss to Nathan's lips, wrapping his arms around the other man and pulling him closer.

When they broke apart, Nathan's eyes sparkled at him.

"Do you want to try again?" Nathan asked softly in his Irish lilt.

Simon allowed himself a small smile, willing the embarrassment to stay away.

"Do you want to?" He asked.

"Practice makes perfect." Nathan grinned.

When the pair made it back to the bed, Nathan was shocked when he felt Simon push him gently down into a sitting position. He watched as Simon eased his jeans down his legs and threw them aside and realised exactly what was happening.

Simon glanced up at Nathan momentarily, worry evident in his eyes, before he lowered his mouth down and slowly suckled on the head of Nathan's cock. Nathan's eyes closed instinctively at the feelings that surged through him.

He felt incredible and powerful and vulnerable and oddly guilty at the same time.

He looked back down to Simon, who was staring up at him again and he identified the twinge of guilt. This was Simon's first time, he remembered how embarrassed he'd been the first time he'd given a blowjob.

He also remembered how he'd gotten through it, as well.

He smiled gently down at Simon and reached a hand down, placing it on Simon's cheek and easing his head forward slightly.

He could feel his own dick through the skin of Simon's cheek and felt his breath hitch in his throat.

After a moment, Simon realised what Nathan was doing, he was guiding Simon through the act, showing him what to do.

He smiled around Nathan as he heard him moan above him and, gaining confidence at this achievement, he pulled back slightly and allowed his tongue to swipe at the underside of Nathan's cock.

He felt Nathan buck suddenly at the sensation and heard the whimper that came from above and mentally logged that that action caused Nathan to go crazy.

So he did it again, and again and soon Nathan was coming hard.

When Nathan looked back down at him, his eyes looked tired but satisfied.

Smiling, Simon surged upwards and captured Nathan's mouth in a kiss. Nathan moaned slightly as he could taste himself on Simon's tongue. Whether that was hot or gross, he didn't know.

He decided on hot and kissed Simon back.

Nathan pulled Simon back onto the bed, the exhaustion of the day of moving and of their evening activities gaining the better of the both of them.

Simon settled down quite happily and Nathan draped the covers over the pair of them.

There was something strangely surreal about sharing a bed with another person, especially with that other person being Simon.

"I can't believe this." Said Nathan after a moment.

"What?" Asked Simon.

Nathan shuffled until he and Simon were lying down, face to face.

"We just moved in together." Nathan explained. "It's like we have a proper life."

Simon smiled hugely. "I know, I like the idea of it."

"Me too." Nathan agreed, scooting closer to Simon until Simon wrapped his arms around Nathan's lithe frame.

Nathan found himself relaxing instantly before he felt that familiar, painful pull on his heart where Simon used to be.

He turned his head slightly to see Simon absent-mindedly drawing little circles onto his collarbone.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

Simon stilled his hand movements. "Sorry, I just zoned out. Was I tickling you?"

"No," Nathan said after a moment, "no, no, sorry. I just...carry on, it felt nice."

Nathan settled again next to his boyfriend as he started making those little circles on his skin again.

Soon, the repetitive motion made Nathan drowsy and he smiled to himself as he felt sleep claim him. Knowing that, slowly but surely, the shattered pieces of his heart were sewing themselves back together again.