I'd left this story open-ended. It has always just been "thoughts from Jack," as he realized his marriage was ending. I, like almost everyone, didn't like the show's ending/absence of characters/details left out, and I really felt like Jack should have been part of some of that. I decided to add this chapter to explore some of his emotions regarding Sharon's illness. The show mentioned the kids had gone out with him one evening (I believe Andy was heard saying that to Rusty), and this is where I decided to explore his thoughts...no, this isn't a happy, full of fun chapter, just thoughts on a woman he'd loved.
Sharon was sick. He never saw that coming; the almost indestructible police captain was ill. It was serious; the kids had flown home to check on her. From what he'd been told, she had ended up in the hospital for almost a week with heart issues. He still couldn't believe it, both that she was sick, and that she had been in the hospital for almost a week before he'd been told. He was family; he'd been family for over three decades. The kids didn't want to argue about it. They just wanted to talk, to share, and to have their dad comfort them. He'd tried. It was hard, but he'd tried. Sharon had heart issues, and he has spent the last almost four hours talking about those issues with the kids. He had just dropped off the kids at the condo, their "home" in Los Angeles, but even that was a joke to him. Their family had a home, one Sharon sold and then bought the condo. He'd even accepted that long ago, seeing as how the kids had grown up, gone to college, and moved out of their family home. He'd spent his share of time in the condo over the last several years, not ever formally moving into it like Rusty or Flynn, but to hear the kids calling it their home-it stung.
He had just taken Emily and Ricky to dinner, and he could see the worry on their faces. Sharon's heart was weak, and it seemed to have been caused by her recent bout with the flu. Yeah, he wasn't buying that. Now, it seemed to all make sense. She was stuck on marrying that idiot Flynn, and now, he could see it. Flynn had made her heart sick. He'd done this to Sharon; it was the only explanation. Flynn had wormed his way in over the last several years, causing Sharon to make a list of bad decisions involving Jack, and that was causing her problems now. The kids said she might need a new heart; Flynn had done that to her. He'd weaseled his way into her heart, and now it was sick. Looking at it all, Jack didn't see that as a coincidence, even though medically, any doctor would argue with him that a person couldn't make someone's heart sick. He knew Flynn had done that. Sharon had never had heart issues while married to him; Flynn moved in, proposed to her, and now here she had heart issues. It didn't make sense, except to say that Flynn was not healthy for Sharon.
As he sat in the parking lot of Sharon's building and glanced up at her condo, he thought back over the years. Sharon had loved him with that heart. She'd loved him for years, even when he'd messed up over and over and over. She'd loved him and welcomed him home. Even when it was strained, she eventually caved; her heart gave into Jack, and she always came around for him, except until she didn't. That had to be it. These heart problems were affecting more than just her body; he was sure the problems were getting into her mind and had been for years. He didn't care what a physical exam said, even if it had declared her fit for duty the last few years; he was sure her heart was sick in more ways than one.
Sharon might need a transplant; she could also die. The kids cried about that, his grown children, and he fought to hold back the tears too. He had spoken to the kids about this at dinner, not realizing until then just how serious this all was. It couldn't be happening to Sharon. She was the strong one, the tough one. Her heart couldn't be weak; she couldn't be weak. It just wasn't Sharon. She didn't have health issues. He had health issues, even if he had never been upfront with Sharon about those. Even Flynn had health issues. He knew about those over the years, including the recent heart attack. Sharon didn't have heart issues. The kids had kept him updated on Sharon and Flynn for years now. She was the strong one, not Flynn, but she was now the sick one. Flynn had destroyed his body with alcohol. Jack had destroyed his body with alcohol. Both had health issues. Sharon couldn't. She ate well. She took care of herself and exercised. She did the right things. She picked up the pieces when no one else did. No, Sharon couldn't be sick, but after spending the last couple hours with the kids, he knew she was. She was seriously ill, and things might get worse before they got better, even if they ever got better.
All that made sense, but the facts showed that Sharon was sick. The kids told Jack they all needed to be strong, to be strong for Sharon. They included him in that. "Dad, you need to be strong," Ricky had told him, explaining that everyone around Sharon needed to be there for her. Jack needed to be strong. He wasn't the strong one; Sharon was. The kids needed to be strong. Sharon had always been strong for them. Flynn, Jack almost wanted to laugh at him, because the idea of him being strong was laughable, except the kids said he'd really been there for Sharon. He'd been strong, and the kids wanted Jack to be strong too, to pray for Sharon, to do anything possible to help her. In Jack's case, the kids had asked that he stay out of the way. Yes, he could be concerned and even ask about Sharon-to them-but, the kids had asked that he remain strong for Sharon. His Sharon, except she now wasn't his. She hadn't been for several years now, even if legally they had been married up until a couple years ago.
Her heart was sick. It just didn't make sense. Thinking about her work, she even was careful with that, as careful as a cop could be. She worked with other detectives who did the field work mostly. They should be the ones sick, the ones in danger, not Sharon. She'd spent most of her career behind a desk, climbing the chain of command, and here she was, a decorated police captain and sick. It just didn't add up. It just wasn't fair. She'd shot a man in cold blood, in a courtroom; she'd stopped someone's heart with that bullet, as she'd protected the lives of others. She'd kept them alive, and yet, she was now fighting for her own life.
He could see the lights on inside the condo even from the ground floor. They were all there for Sharon- Emily, Ricky, even Rusty and Flynn-Sharon's "new" family as he called them. The kids didn't like that; they were happy for their mom, and they even said they wanted the best for him in his future. Problem was, he realized now, much too late, he'd let the best go-Sharon and the kids-he'd let go, and he couldn't get them back. And, regarding his future, he was realizing that the future wasn't guaranteed. Sharon's future wasn't guaranteed. Anything and anyone could come up and challenge that future.
Someone had challenged Sharon's future; someone had changed Sharon's future. Sharon had turned to Flynn. She'd told Jack during one of their run-ins that she was in love with Flynn, Andy, as she said. She loved him and wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. It hurt to hear that because he'd believed she would spend the rest of her life with him, even waiting on him. Yeah, he wasn't surprised her heart was sick after claiming to love that one. It just didn't make sense. Sharon made room in her heart for so many, even Flynn included, and now, that heart was sick.
He couldn't lose her. He'd lost her, but he couldn't LOSE her, not forever. Sharon was the one who was supposed to outlive everyone. The way the kids were talking, Flynn had told them the doctor was giving all scenarios, and one included just that-death. The kids had said Flynn had dismissed it; Sharon would get better, and worst case, she'd get a new heart. That would be the end of it, no negotiation. Sharon didn't negotiate-at least not with him-she made the rules. It was all or nothing with her, and she would get better, end of story. Heart issues weren't even on the radar for him. He didn't think anything would bother Sharon, not after she'd been married to him so long. She'd put up with a lot from him; he knew it, and yet, she'd put up with him and survived. She could survive this too.
Ricky and Emily were worried, very worried. Flynn was worried, or so he had been told. Ricky had told him that. Rusty, apparently, was a mess, very worried about the one mom who had stuck around for him. Sharon. She had to get better. She had to get back to work. She had things to do, even if that included marrying Flynn. He would give that to Sharon to just let her be okay. He'd excuse her getting married to that idiot if she would just get through this and get back to her old self. She couldn't have heart issues; it wasn't Sharon. She didn't slow down for anyone or anything. She needed to be there for the kids, for the family. He couldn't do it alone; that was Sharon. She was the loving one, the caring one, and her sick heart had to get better for the family. He wasn't up to the task, and he couldn't lose her.
As he continued to sit in the car and look up at the condo, he thought about Flynn. He was surprised the drunk had stuck around. The kids said Flynn really loved Sharon and had been taking good care of her. Once upon a time, he had really loved Sharon. He knew he still loved her, but he didn't know if it was enough, if it had ever been enough because he'd left over and over. Sharon had always just wanted to love and be loved by that heart, that same heart that was now the central problem in her life. He'd loved that heart. Flynn now claimed to love that heart, and Sharon might need a new heart. Apparently, she'd worn hers out. If possible, she'd loved too much; she'd given too much of it, and now, it was done. He hadn't done that to her. Yes, it only made sense to him that Flynn had. Flynn was the root of the heart issue. Putting the blame on Flynn put it somewhere; it held someone accountable because in his eyes, someone had to be accountable. Anything else, a fluke illness, just wasn't possible, not for Sharon. She was the strongest woman he knew. She needed to stay that way too, strong and healthy because her family, all her family, needed her.
