Author's Note!
I'm sorry this is sooooo late! I had writer's block for a while and then ended up writing another SakuraxKakashi fanfic called Summer Days. Check it out if you're interested. School has been hectic too. I finally received my nursing license to be a nursing assistant and I'm still going to school to finish my LPN education.
Because everyone has supported me and reviewed this fanfiction, I would like to extend my thanks to you all. I know I had promised last chapter that I'd personally write all of your user names as a shout out thanks but I didn't realize there were too many of you
I'm very excited to start blooming things up here now that I've passed a hurdle of writer's block and I hope you stick around to read what I have to offer.
Again, I'm sorry for the long wait and delay and I hope you don't chopeth thy head off..eth lol I suck and classical literature XP
Enjoy
-Rusala
February 1 2:12 pm
Sakura dropped herself onto the grass in the middle of the yard, panting beyond normal. Gasping, swallowing dry spit, gasping some more, and keeping her eyes shut tightly seemed the like best option at the moment. Five months had gone by after her impulsive decision to change everything. Her decision not to stay the weak young woman she had grown up to be, would be no more by the time she was done.
Letting the peak of the sun's heat burn at her skin, she pulled a tired arm over her eyes and continued to breathe as best as she could, though that didn't stop her lungs from burning with each deep breath she took.
"I take back what I said before." Kakashi mused as he sat beside her with his favorite book in hand.
Sakura didn't look at him let alone acknowledge him for the moment. She was too exhausted. Too worn.
"You know…if you lay out here any longer you're going to get burnt."
Feeling her heavy pants coming to deep, inhales, she coughed to reset her breathing and spoke in a gruff manner.
"Sunburn is easy to heal. Its just a reddening and inflammation of the skin caused by ultraviolet rays."
"Interesting. Tell me more." he cooed.
"You're not really interested. Just fifteen minutes. That's all I ask."
"Ok, then fifteen minutes you shall be granted-" he said, flipping a page of his book. "-at the cost of adding additional sets to your regimen."
Sakura didn't say anything. She exhaled heavily and nodded as best as she could before jumping in surprise and the prickly, cold something that pressed against her neck. Turning to look around at what had touched her, she shot a glare to Kakashi who held a cold water bottle by the cap, swinging it back and forth while he continued to read his book.
"That's not funny." she mumbled and sat up to lean forward, stretching the kinks in her legs and her back.
"I thought it was very funny." he said, trying to sound as uninterested as he could but let the hint of mischief play at the edge of his voice.
"Oh yea, hilarious." she said sarcastically.
"Ah so you agree?" he said, sounding chipper and enthusiastic.
"Can't you be serious with me for once? Please?"
"But I'm always serious. I just seriously like to bother you."
Sakura rolled her eyes and groaned to the man she was forced to call 'sensei' whenever they trained. Taking the gesture of water from his hand Sakura took slow, deep gulps of the icy liquid and let out a content exhale.
"What were you talking about earlier? Something about taking back something?"
"If you don't know then I don't think I should say anything."
"That's not fair Kakashi."
"Sensei. That's Kakashi-Sensei to you." he corrected.
Twitching her brow she smiled bitterly and corrected her form of speech.
"Ok, Kakashi-Sensei, could you please enlighten me on what you were talking about before."
"Much better." he said with a smile and continued to read his book.
Sakura sat there, wondering when he was going to speak and it seemed like forever had passed.
"Are you going to tell me what it is?" she asked curiously and impatiently.
"Hmm…nope." he sang and stood to his feet. "Also, you've had your fifteen minutes. Chase the bells." he said, and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.
Hearing her groan aloud, Kakashi couldn't help but smile as he hid amongst the lush greenery that adorned the back yard. He felt a little bad for torturing her with a hard task, but it was helping her out greatly. She had asked for the training and he wasn't going to go easy on her. Neither did Genma, nor Yamato, and especially not Tsunade. It was good for her. It taught her to be tough. It taught her not to take crap from anyone. It improved her character and provided the proper outlet she needed. But most of all, it made good use of the hidden potential she held.
Potential. The word echoed through Kakashi's ears and bounced back and forth through his mind as he tried to listen to her movements, sniff for her scent, and dash to the next set of greenery as swiftly as he possibly could. Kakashi could clearly remember telling her before, very harshly, that potential could only get you so far. She had taken it as an insult at first, he knew it, no matter how much she tried to hide it, but she had turned that phrase around and used it as a motivator to keep her going, to keep pushing herself to her limits, breaking that limit bar each time and pushing for another limit. She was, impressive in his eyes. A mere five months and she had already been past the level of genin. Maybe almost ready to take on the path of a chunin. It was frightening in a way. She was a diamond in the rough that had begun to polish and shine herself. He couldn't see the end of her growth and had to wonder just how much she'd grow in another five months.
Hearing a few branches crackle nearby, Kakashi noted that he had to move.
'She's a little too scary…besides Tsunade is teaching her things even I can't comprehend.' he thought and disappeared.
Sakura soon arrived to the spot where Kakashi had just been. Her breathing had quieted and her eyes began to dilate, and slowly, she grabbed for a kunai from the pouch strapped to her thigh.
'He was just here.' she thought as she noticed the crushed leaves that fell off of a perfectly healthy tree.
Listening to her surroundings and thinking about the topography of their backyard, Kakashi couldn't escape or go any further north due to private property. Any more west and he would be breaking into the residential area on the other side of the city. Her only two options left were east and south but even those were iffy choices. What was she missing? What was it she wasn't paying attention to? If she couldn't make a simple decision such as this, then her resolve to be a shinobi would have been for nothing. It was irritating. It was frustrating. She knew Kakashi was one of the best but no matter how difficult his lessons were, she felt like he was gong soft on her.
'You chose this. Now think!' she chided to herself.
5 months ago.
The night was still young. Kakashi pinched the bridge of his nose as he leaned his back into the island in the center of the kitchen. Genma said nothing as he poured himself some coffee and Yamato leaned onto the island with his elbows supporting his weight. Each in deep thought on what do to next.
Sakura had just revealed a big part of herself quite drastically and cried like there was no tomorrow. With supporting and reassuring words from Kakashi and the rest, Sakura had calmed down a great deal and became beat red with embarrassment, shame, hurt, reassurance, and frustration as Kakashi helped her put her shirt back on. Though it was a severe breakthrough for Sakura, no one knew how to deal with it. She revealed a lot, by showing her back and crying out her frustrations, but she revealed too little as she never explained why or how she came to that point; but everyone new better than to ask unless she was willing to explain.
"I'm going to bed…" Yamato said quietly, still lost in a world he was trying to comprehend.
Genma said nothing but nodded and Kakashi followed after, saying he should sleep too.
Through the house and halfway up the stairs, Kakashi stopped as his nose picked up a scent he knew. It was faint, but Kakashi had no doubt who it belonged to.
Hearing Kakashi's footsteps come to a stop, Yamato turned to look at Kakashi in a confused manner.
"What's up?" he asked.
Kakashi didn't respond as his nose wrinkled some more and bolted up the stairs and burst through Sakura's door. With a squeak of surprise and a jump from her seat at her desk, Sakura stared in shock at Kakashi's unusual behavior.
Yamato had quickly followed Kakashi and stood in the doorway wondering just what had caught Kakashi's attention.
"Kakashi, what are you doing?" Yamato asked.
Kakashi had stormed inside wrinkling his nose and walked towards the balcony. Opening and closing the glass door, he checked the hinges and the glass for any tampering and played with the handle to the door. He then checked the windows for any tampering as well and exhaled to himself and turned to look at Sakura, who continued to stare at him. His eyes then glanced around the room and noticed the blanket, pillow cases, and bed sheets had been strewn onto the floor in a messy little mound and he looked to Sakura once more. He didn't need to know the rest of the story Sakura didn't tell. He could already guess what happened the moment he caught a whiff of the Uchiha's scent, and saw the state of her sleeping area.
"You washed your sheets yesterday." Kakashi stated, soundly almost a little gruff.
Sakura didn't look at him. She felt too ashamed to. She didn't do anything that called for having her sheets washed but she felt as if they needed to. Being touched by her ex made her feel dirty and it made her sheets look dirty in her eyes. She wanted to rid any presence he had left behind and had planned to do so once everyone had fallen asleep.
"Kakashi, what are you-" Yamato started, but was cut off as Kakashi paid no attention to him and directed his conversation to Sakura.
"Sakura why didn't you tell us he was in here?"
Sakura averted her gaze to the floor and played with the hem of her shirt, pursing her lips to keep her silence. She couldn't say anything. She was too ashamed to. Kakashi had completed the puzzle as to why she snapped the way she did earlier today. He could only stare at her. Stare at the expression of shame and humiliation that plagued her soft, delicate features. He knew the answer was obvious, but he still had to ask. He needed to hear her answer. He was upset.
"Did he touch you?" he asked in a stern, quiet tone.
Bolting her attention towards Kakashi with eyes of panic, Kakashi who knew the answer was yes, had his assumptions confirmed and exhaled a long, heavy breath, trying to calm his blood form boiling any further. There was no denying the fact that he was pissed. In his own house, his student had seemingly used a simple technique to sneak around and invade Sakura's privacy and to try and defile her. But what also pissed him off was that he hadn't noticed a thing. If he had gone to check on Sakura, he would have noticed something off. No. Instead he stayed downstairs catching up on the 'good times' after their training session. How could he have been so blind? Nothing strange ever passed by without him noticing so why didn't he notice? Was it because it seemed so not normal? Things never were normal when it concerned his students.
"Kakashi what are you talking about?" Yamato asked in a concerned manner.
"He was in here." he replied quickly without looking away from Sakura. "Shinobi or not I'm pressing charges." he said authoritatively and tried to make his way out of her room, only to feel her grab onto the back of his shirt.
"D-Don't!" She croaked desperately.
Kakashi turned a stunned eye to her and watched her carefully. Her hands and her arms trembled, her gaze was shifted to his face but her eyes were filled with fear and desperation.
"Sakura…" he began, trying to sound as soothing as he could. "what he did was out of line. You have every right to press charges. I am your guardian so I'm going to do it for you."
"You can't!" she quickly added and tightened her grip on his shirt.
As much as she wanted to press charges, Sakura couldn't risk that. She wasn't from Konoha. Pressing charges meant involving the police. Involving the police meant performing a background search. And a background search meant a forceful return home from immigration. Tsunade may have been the Hokage, she may have made Sakura a citizen of Konoha, but like any city, illegal immigrants were deported to where they came from once the truth was revealed. The fact that Sakura was still underage when she left didn't help her either. She would have definitely been forced to return.
Exhaling a heavy breath, Kakashi gently pulled on Sakura's hands off of his shirt and guided her to the couch in the corner, slowly sitting beside her.
"Why don't you want to press charges?" he asked, sounding distant.
Sakura didn't answer. She played with her thumbs and stared at the floor unable to open her mouth. She still couldn't tell anyone about her past. Pressing charges would only complicate things and would force the truth out into the open.
Glancing to the door Sakura gave Yamato a nervous look and Yamato took the hint to walk away, closing the door behind him. There was no way Sakura was going to say anything with him around and he knew it. Especially not after her episode from earlier this evening.
"Sakura." Kakashi began sternly, and rested his elbows over his knees. "If you don't answer me, I'm going to go ahead and press charges."
Flinching at Kakashi's remark, Sakura continued to say nothing as they sat next to one another in close proximity. The silence filled the room and she could only blame herself for how things have gotten this way. If she didn't snap, if she didn't let that damn clone get the best of her, she wouldn't be in this predicament.
Kakashi continued to wait in silence as she began to fidget where she sat, biting her lower lip in deep concentration. She tried to open her mouth a few times to say something but found herself closing it quickly. The uneasiness that pulled at the pit of her stomach seemed to pull even harder and she began to purse her lips. How much more was she going to reveal before Kakashi or any else in the house found her repulsive?
"I'm going to report him." Kakashi stated, coming to his own conclusion without listening to Sakura, though it wasn't like she had said anything.
"Don't."
"Sakura…we're going in circles here…he could have hurt you. He could have done something worse than just invading your room and -." Kakashi chided as calmly as he could but couldn't finish his statement. He had come short of the sentence 'touching you' and felt his blood boil again. Why was it, that the thought of another man touching her upset him? Was it because he thought of her as a friend? As a frail young woman? Was there more meaning to it? Kakashi didn't but it just upset him.
"But he didn't. Lets just leave it alone…" she pleaded.
Kakashi was lost. First, Sakura was just about ready to kill the guy and now she was defending him? Kakashi couldn't understand where she was coming from until the thought of lingering feelings crossed his mind.
"Did you love him?" he asked, trying to sound uninterested. If she in fact loved Sasuke, of course she wouldn't be able to press charges against him. It would give him the opportunity to bother her as many times as he wanted.
Sakura, however, felt insulted he would even suggest that. This wasn't about love at all and she grew upset with herself that she couldn't find it in her to tell Kakashi her fears of being sent back.
"No!" she defended.
"Then why don't you want to press charges?"
"…I can't…" she said hesitantly.
"I can."
"No. You can't." she quickly spouted.
Rustling a hand through his silver hair, Kakashi exhaled roughly and turned to look at Sakura.
"Sakura, I don't understand why you're telling me I can't press charges. If you don't tell me, then I'll never know. This is a serious offense."
Sakura looked to him with frustration and searched his lone eye desperately. Why couldn't she say it? It wasn't hard. It was just a few sentences.
Seeing as though he wasn't getting anywhere with her Kakashi spoke up with another proposition.
"What do you want to do then?"
'What do you want to do then?' Those words rang through Sakura's ears as if there was nothing left to hear. What did she want to do? What could she do?
Kakashi's lone eye softened and looked away from Sakura. Standing up to walk away, Sakura grabbed onto his shirt again, deep in thought. Kakashi couldn't leave yet. Not until she said something. And all the while Sakura held onto his shirt, Kakashi said nothing as he stood there, waiting for her to say something.
The silence had been heavy and almost unbearable but Kakashi was more than willing to hear her out if she was going to say something, but she never did. Grabbing his shirt again told him she had something more to say and thought he should wait just a bit longer, that maybe she'll say something witty, or something profound and understanding. But she didn't. Instead she spoke serious, determined words that completely threw him off guard.
"I'll become stronger." she gritted through clenched teeth. "Strong enough that he wouldn't mess with me anymore…both mentally and physically…"
Kakashi turned to looked at Sakura and saw no more fear, no more hesitation, and no more disparity. Instead he saw determination, fire, and resolve light up her soft, delicate features. The glint of confidence twinkling in her eye said more than he could have imagined and understood right away where she was going, even if he had been against it from the beginning.
"If I become someone strong, he wouldn't mess with me anymore. If I become someone great he'll lose to me definitely. If I sit back and press charges, do nothing, and respond to his whim and spontaneous calculations, he'd be winning the sick little game he started with me. So I'll definitely enjoy this game for the long run and watch him lose to me in the end."
Kakashi nodded, taking her words in carefully. Was this what she really needed to create the resolve to jump into a life of danger? A life of possible regret? A scarring life to the soft-hearted?
"Sakura, are you absolutely sure about something like this?" Kakashi asked in a concerned tone.
Intensifying her gaze into Kakashi's, Sakura nodded and opened her mouth to be heard loud and clear. Ridding herself of any misleading dialogue.
"I'll become a medical ninja, a shinobi. I'll etch myself into the city of Konoha like a strong, proud citizen Tsunade and everyone had offered for me to be, and have him watch me from behind."
Back to her training
Sakura glanced around, still standing in the same spot. Time was ticking and if she couldn't at least find him or be near him by the time her session ended, warm ups tomorrow were going to be replaced with walking Pakkun and the rest of the pack. Not that she minded taking a light stroll with them, but she wanted to train. No, scratch that, she needed to. Walking with the pack would only put a dent into her plans.
Quickly slipping her kunai back into its pouch Sakura had thought of an interesting idea. If Kakashi had backtracked to the house, she would have passed him. If he had headed east, well Sakura couldn't remember what laid in wait in the east but something felt off. Though she couldn't sense his presence there was a weird atmosphere that had begun to build in the thicket. She tapped her foot on the ground and walked in a large circle as she inspected the little open area and then began to knock on some trees.
With the corners of her lips raising, Sakura had punched down a tree with a chakra infused fist and did the same to the tree that mirrored it, creating a parallel set up of two trees.
"Look underneath the underneath huh?" Sakura said with smirk and punched the ground beneath her.
Sure enough, just as the ground had begun to crumble, raise, and disperse, Kakashi was elevated and pinned between the two trees Sakura had punched down.
"I found you." she sang and walked over to him with a wide, eerie grin.
Trying to set himself loose with each squirm and wiggle, he could clearly see his loss coming and had really begun to fear Sakura. She was closing the distance and fast. Or maybe it had seemed fast as he couldn't move. Her simple steps had finally reached him and she bent over to meet his gaze, slowly reaching for the pouch of his flack jacket where he kept the bells.
"Looks like I win, Sensei." she giggled, but soon found herself jumping out of the way of what looked like a boulder that had come into view.
The boulder had miraculously collided against one of the tree trunks, giving Kakashi the leeway he needed to escape.
"Kakashi-Sensei!" whined a familiar voice that upset Sakura on all ends. There was only one guy she knew with that voice and he was nothing more than a traitor in her eyes.
Upon seeing the boisterous, blond come into distance, Sakura felt enraged. Not only was she looking at the young man who befriended the man she hated, she was looking at the young man who ruined her chance to move onto the next lesson.
"You idiot!" she shouted and swung an unexpected punch towards his face, knocking him off of his feet and into a tree.
"S-S-Sakura! What are you doing here?" he stammered in fear. Naruto couldn't believe what had just happened. Why was Sakura out here and why did she just punch him? Why hadn't he noticed her at all? Suddenly, memories of the night she snapped at Sasuke came flooding back and he wondered if she was having another episode. The last time he saw her was that unsettling night and he desperately took in her appearance. Her long, beautiful pink locks that rested upon the small of her back had now been cut short to neatly grazed over her shoulders, leaving her with a strong, confident appearance. Her creamy skin had been covered in dirt, sweat, bruises, and scrapes with a slight tinge of pink he assumed was sunburn. Her eyes were fierce and filled with rage as it glowed a brilliant jade and her stance looked as if she were ready the beat the crap out of him.
"You! I can't believe you!" she hollered and grunted loudly in irritation.
"Now, now, you almost had me. As a reward we can start the new installment of your training tomorrow." Kakashi said reassuring.
"Its not the same." she growled and turned to glare at Naruto.
Laughing nervously, Naruto had no idea what was happening and looked to Kakashi for assistance.
"D-Did I miss something?" he asked nervously.
"As if you don't know!" Sakura huffed and stomped her way back to the house leaving Kakashi and Naruto to talk amongst themselves as they made their way back to the house.
"Kakashi-Sensei, what the hell happened to you?" Naruto asked, taking in his ex-teacher's overall appearance.
Pulling a book out to keep him occupied as he walked with Naruto, he shrugged his shoulders and flashed him his infamous eye crinkle.
"Sakura happened. And why are you suddenly using 'sensei'? I'm not your teacher anymore I'm your equal."
"Say what?"
"I was training with Sakura today."
"Eh! Without me?" Naruto griped. "You're so mean! You could have…wait…is Sakura training to be a shinobi?" he asked excitedly.
Kakashi only hummed in response and Naruto began to jump with glee.
"I knew she had it in her! And judging by both of your appearances, it looks like she's doing well! Or maybe you're just getting old?" he sniggered.
"Naruto, I'm still in the prime of my youth. She's just that…scary…?" He thought, trying to find the right words to describe her. "Maybe noteworthy?"
Making a strange, duck puckered expression, Naruto lightly held his hand in front of his lips and began to "pfft."
"Hmm?" Kakashi hummed curiously. "What's that for?"
"The great Kakashi-Sensei is scared of a seventeen year old girl?" he chortled.
"Weren't you scared of her just a second ago? I don't think you have a right to make accusations." Kakashi suggested, clearly enjoying the frozen fear that plastered on Naruto's face as he remembered the punch. It wasn't even a chakra infused punch so anyone could grow frightened of it. That force, that impact, how did a slim, young woman like her hide her monstrous strength?
"In any case, you might want to stay away from her for a while."
"Huh? Why?"
"She's…how should I say…upset…"
"About me interrupting? I'll just apologize then."
Kakashi sighed and flipped through the next page of his beloved book. "No Naruto, I don't mean-"
"Yosh! I'm going to go an apologize! Meet you back at the house!" Naruto beamed and dashed off, without any real knowledge as to why Sakura was upset.
Kakashi found himself pocketing his book and chasing after Naruto in an attempt to stop him. The boy didn't know Sakura held complete animosity towards him. Kakashi didn't know at first until Sakura opened up about her feelings towards Naruto. It was a simple suggestion he made to have Naruto spar with her and she shot that suggestion down faster than lightning could strike. It didn't matter what Kakashi could have said to her, she was clearly never going to listen, even if he had tried to defend Naruto's honor. Having been through the things she has, any form of misunderstanding or betrayal meant she was more than willing to put it on the "x" list or the "hate" list. Words weren't going to help her in the least unless she saw some form of proof.
Just as Kakashi had caught up and reached the back yard he was a little too late. Sakura had instinctively thrown another punch Naruto's way as he tried to apologize.
"Sakura-chan I'm sorry for ruining your training session!" he wailed, catching her punch and causing the people from within the house to come out and observe.
"If you want we can team up and work together. I'm pretty strong so-"
"That'd be even worse." she spat and tossed another punch his way.
"What? Why are you so mad? I'm sorry! Do you hate me just because I messed up your training session?"
"That's just one reason."
Naruto had surprisingly lost is footing over a spar so ridiculously simple that it gave Sakura a massive advantage to give him a harmful blow. Raising her heel and ready to strike downwards, Sakura had stopped herself from going through with the kick and backed away before Kakashi jumped between them to intervene.
No one said anything. Instead they silently observed.
Sakura, with a pained expression, couldn't look at Naruto. Somewhere inside she still felt fond of the energetic idiot and couldn't go through with harming him no matter how much anger she held towards him. Just as long as she kept her distance from him, then it wouldn't have mattered if he was in the vicinity or not. Turning on the balls of her feet, Sakura walked into the house, passing by the familiar faces of Genma, Yamato, and interestingly, Shikamaru. She didn't acknowledge their presence and had not been phased by the slight bumping of her shoulder against someone. Instead she walked into the house with her mind on autopilot, ready to get away from Naruto, ready to enter the shower, ready to cook an early dinner, and ready to study before Tsunade arrived.
5:13 pm
Cooking for six people wasn't an issue for Sakura. It was easy. All you needed to do was add a little extra of this and a little extra of that. The only issue she had was allowing Naruto to hang around the kitchen while she cooked. If he wasn't in the way, he was just irritating. He'd sigh loudly, he'd stare, he'd groan and grunt to catch her attention, and from time to time he'd whine about how she was treating him. Silence was her best answer for the young blond, though beating him to a pulp and kicking him out would have been the easier, self satisfying choice. Or not? Sakura didn't know how to deal with him other than just keeping her aggravated silence but her patience was wearing thin. Especially now as Naruto had tried to impatiently steal samples of what she had been cooking; earning him a glare, a slap to his hands, or having some sort of instrument fly by his face causing the wind to lightly bounce against his cheek.
"Sakura-chan I'm sorry. I really didn't know you were training with Kakashi-sensei. I'm sorry I ruined your chance." Naruto said with plea.
"…" Sakura didn't say anything. She walked past Naruto to reach the stove of boiling water and tossed in the vegetables she had just cleaned, peeled, and cut.
"Sakura please say something." he begged.
Sakura looked to her left, looked him up and down with a glare, and huffed.
"Move." she ordered. "I need the salt and you're in the way."
Naruto blinked for a second and stood his ground. "No."
"Move, Naruto." she growled.
"Not until you tell me why you're mad at me." he bit back.
"Why do you even care? We've never seen each other often. This is like the eighth time I've seen you since we've met."
"You were counting?" he asked curiously with a hint of glee hidden at the edge of his voice.
"Naruto." she groaned. "Salt. Now."
"Just because we've only met eight times doesn't mean we're not friends. Of course I care." he argued.
Sighing heavily, he grabbed the salt for her and handed it over carefully, feeling the force of her hand pull the salt roughly from him.
Friends? Sakura had to mentally laugh at that. He sure was good at playing the innocent card wasn't he? No. That wasn't true. Sakura knew he was innocent from the start didn't she? It was all so confusing. Was he a friend? Or was he a foe? So many conflicting thoughts and emotions raged in and out of Sakura and she couldn't understand why she was so upset with Naruto anymore. No, that wasn't true either. She did understand. He was good friends with that bastard. There was no way someone as cruel and twisted as Sasuke could be good friends with someone who was seemingly genuine, earnest, and, well, stupid on some points, but very loyal and nice.
What was wrong with her? Couldn't she have given him the benefit of the doubt? Shouldn't she have given him the benefit of the doubt? Yes and no. Yes and no. Yes and no. It was frustrating and confusing. Could she even trust someone like Naruto? Kakashi and the rest seemed to but she couldn't. Or could she? Back and forth, round and round, Sakura was making no progress with what she was thinking. Sakura didn't know that as much as she had moved on as a person, there would always be room for a relapse of some sort. That it wasn't easy placing or misplacing your trust in people. Sakura didn't know what to do. She didn't know what to think.
Naruto had been apologizing to her profusely the moment they came back to the house. The images and memories of when she first met the young man came flowing back to her in an attempt to make sense of him, his personality, his over all being; desperately trying, desperately wanting to reconnect with him, desperately wanting to be the so called 'friend' he had called her. It was too hard for her. But it was too easy for her as well. And again her mind moved round and round in circles at the most painstakingly obvious answer but she couldn't find it in herself to forgive the issue he never created, but instead she created. Was it spite? Was it fear? Was it pride? Or was it just plain stubbornness holding her back?
"Sakura-chan, please tell me why you're so mad at me." he said, canceling her thoughts and leaving her an empty slate for communication and reconnection.
Was this really ok to tell him why she was upset? Would he still think of her as a friend? He said he was really good friends with Sasuke, so didn't that mean he'd chose him over her? No, in healthy relationships, even if she was Naruto's friend, it wasn't right having him choose between them. Sakura knew the outcome if she told him…or maybe she didn't. Naruto always had a way of being strangely affectionate even to people that irritated him so would she be alright telling him?
Deciding that her choice was now or never, she swallowed hard and had begun to speak.
"Naruto, the reason-"
Naruto's cell phone had completely cut Sakura off and Naruto was stupid enough to apologize to her and answer his phone.
"Sasuke not right now, I'm busy with something."
Sasuke? No. If there was a god, he or she really seemed to hate Sakura to the ends of the earth. This wasn't fair and it certainly wasn't helping her case with Naruto, especially hearing how chummy and cheerful he sounded as he was on the phone.
'Naruto, you idiot…this is your answer isn't it?' she thought to herself, and felt hurt, and upset all over again.
"No, I'm meeting with Hinata and her family for an important dinner that night so let's make it next week." Naruto continued.
Turning the stove off and bringing the pot to the sink to drain the boiling water, Sakura bit her lip in concentration and in anger. Everything she had considered of being friends and going back to the way things were with Naruto were reaching the point of no return and she knew it. It hurt too much. Maybe someone like her wasn't worthy of making friends. Maybe she didn't deserve having bonds like most people were privileged to have.
"Ah Sakura-chan, sorry about that! I shouldn't have answered my phone and it was extremely rude! I'm so sorry! I turned it off and you now have my complete and undivided attention." he panicked.
Placing the pot onto the counter, Sakura shot him a hurt glare and felt like she wanted to punch him all over again.
"Naruto…"
"Yes?"
"Get out. I don't want to look at your face." she said quietly.
"Wh-What? Why? You still haven't told me why you're mad. Why did you suddenly change your mind?" he argued with concern.
"Naruto…just, get out." she said, voice shaking as she clenched her fist; letting tears form in her eyes out of hurt, anger, frustration, and confusion.
"No. Not until you tell me what's going on."
Naruto placed his hands onto her shoulders quickly and shook her slightly, catching her attention in shock. Why was he touching her? Was he going to hit her for being weak? For daring to show tears? No. This wasn't happening. She was strong. She was strong. Right? She wasn't in that environment anymore but it didn't stop her from wanting to run away, but the warmth in his hands and the worried expression on his face kept her from leaving.
"Sakura-chan, you're my friend. If I did anything to make you mad then tell me so I don't ruin our friendship."
Friend. Friendship. The foreign words rang in her ears and bounced against the walls of kitchen, threatening to carve out her ears.
Swallowing hard, she gently pushed his hands off of her and quietly spoke.
"It'd be better if I showed you…"
Yes. Show him. She couldn't tell him. She couldn't. She didn't have the strength to say any of it aloud. But she could show him instead. She wouldn't have to look at him if she showed him. She had no issue showing Kakashi, Genma, and Yamato, so Naruto was no different. If Naruto tried anything, Kakashi would intervene, wouldn't he? Sakura had placed much more faith in silver haired man so somehow she knew he'd come to her rescue if something went wrong and the same applied to Yamato and Genma. Though she couldn't understand why she preferred Kakashi more.
Turning around and slowly lifting her shirt with shaky, hesitant hands, she had just revealed her navel before Kakashi had entered the kitchen swiftly and pulled her shirt back down while Genma had just as secretly latched his hands over Naruto's eyes.
"Guess who." Genma said femininely and affectionately.
"Genma stop." Naruto laughed and tried to shake out of his grip.
"No can do. You guessed wrong." he said, and leaned in to lightly blow against Naruto's neck.
Feeling his skin scrawl and shudder massively, Naruto panicked and tried to get out Genma's grasp.
"Yuck! Genma I know its you! That's gross! Get off of me!"
"I don't know what you're talking about sexy." he said seductively.
"Don't! I have a girlfriend that I love and cherish! I'm not a bottom! You're not going to poke my ass! Get away from me!" he wailed, finally able to break from Genma's grasp and ran into the living room where the two most sane people he knew were.
Genma skipped along behind him shooting Kakashi the, 'you owe me' glare and proceeded to skip, calling out to Naruto affectionately. "Darling!"
"…"
"Sakura…"
Scooting a bit from Kakashi's hold on her shirt, Sakura's face heated in embarrassment. Was she just about to take her shirt off again? Why? Her guardians were one thing and Naruto was completely another. She was going to show Naruto right? She was going to show him because she couldn't tell him. But why? Why was she desperate to show him as well?
"Sakura, you need to stop taking your shirt off in front of men." he teased, trying to get her attention away from the stressful idea she had to prove something by taking off her shirt.
Sakura pursed her lips and looked at him questioningly.
"Kakashi…I…um…" She stammered, realizing how impulsive she was being.
"I thought you wanted to be a shinobi. Not an exhibitionist." he teased, trying to sound as if he were lecturing her.
Feeling her cheeks flush greatly, Sakura glared at him and slapped his arm causing a light thwack sound to reverberate through the kitchen.
"Ok, ok sorry, bad time for a bad joke." he said with his hands raised in defense.
Sakura said nothing as she averted her gaze to the floor and took in the new found silence, well, almost silence. The background noise of laughter and bickering faintly filled the kitchen and the light thumping of Sakura's heart echoed into her ears. The aroma of the pot roast had soaked itself into her clothes and her nostrils and was now conflicting with the minty, rainforest scent of Kakashi's body wash. The same body wash she found appealing the first day she moved here.
"I can't say it." she said quietly.
"But its worse taking off your shirt right? Sakura, you don't need to take it off to prove a point. Besides its obvious you're not comfortable with it."
Pressing her lips together, she looked to Kakashi in deep concentration, wondering how she could get her message across if she couldn't say it. Kakashi knew of the story but she couldn't ask him to tell Naruto for her. She couldn't. It wasn't the strong way of doing things. It was the weak, cowardly way of doing it. Besides, he had done so much for her, including the others, she couldn't ask something as burdening and selfish as this from him.
"You know…" he said, moving to lean against the counter. "Its not wrong to ask for help."
Looking to Kakashi with wide eyes, Sakura quietly listened to what he had to say.
"If you can't say it, you can write it down. Or, you can ask for help. Or both. By the way I think the pot roast is done." he sang, and wrinkled his nose.
7:20 pm
The silence was killing her. Sakura couldn't concentrate properly on the freshly dead piece of carcass on the her bedroom floor. The smell was increasing, the blood had begun to soak into the scroll it lied upon, and Sakura's stomach was in turmoil at the scent. But she had other things on her mind that kept her from hurling up dinner. Kakashi was probably filling Naruto in on the situation right about now and Sakura swallowed hard. In the end, she had gone the cowardly route, writing down on a piece of paper asking if Kakashi could do it for her. She was upset with herself. She thought she had been strong but wasn't.
Tsunade said nothing as she laid on Sakura's bed reading though a scroll she had given Sakura the week before. The scroll to prep her for the process of reviving failed organs. Fish were the simple targets to get Sakura started on, but she was advancing very nicely in Tsunade's eyes that she gave Sakura a whole pig to work on this time. Glancing towards Sakura, she smiled inwardly at the grimace that stained her face and the few sweat droplets the had begun to drip down her forehead. Deciding to make things interesting, a wicked grin plastered itself across Tsunade's lips.
"Ten more minutes and it'll be useless. If you can't get that pig up and breathing in ten minutes not only will the decaying smell increase, but I've rigged that scroll to induce a bloating and explosion effect on the pig. If you don't want your room to be covered in ornaments of the lovely innards then I suggest you focus more before your ten minutes are up."
Seeing Sakura flinch and twitch, and then push extreme focus onto the dead carcass brought joy to Tsunade. It was the perfect joke to get Sakura out of the slump she had just been in and it was the perfect joke to create a fictional, stressful situation. On the battlefield if there is a slight chance that you have time to stop and heal the injured, you better do it thinking you have a timed bomb strapped to yourself. It was one of the reasons Tsunade purposely had Sakura perform exercises like this her room. Without the stress and pressure to keep her room clean and keep the stench from staining anything in her room, Sakura wouldn't have been able to perform at her best. With this sort of conditioning, it kept Sakura at a constant, even pace each time they worked on these sort of exercises if and when they changed location.
Switching to lay on her stomach and swing her legs back and forth, Tsunade smiled and continued to read through the scroll she knew by heart, and quietly observed Sakura through half lidded eyes.
Sakura exhaled hard as she was getting tired but could see the finish line. She could take it easy now as she finished up the last, pumping and sewing to the pig with her chakra infused fingers.
"Shisshou…" she started and wiped her forehead with the sleeve of her shirt. Along the way of becoming a shinobi Sakura had to change the way she addressed Tsunade.
"Hmm?" she grunted.
"How is it possible that this pig lived this long? It should have died no longer after a year."
"Oh?" Tsunade asked with interest. Sakura was sharp but Tsunade wanted to know what she had caught onto. Five months of pounding as much information as she could to Sakura left her amazed at how much and how fast she absorbed it all. Sakura's room had begun to have little walk space with all the books and scrolls that adorned the floor. Though her little cheating method helped her out a great deal, Sakura just had the natural talent for it.
"Shisshou, ventricular septal defect is serious. He should have died long before ever coming into my room."
"Hmm? 'He' you say?"
Things had piqued Tsunade's interest even more. Normally, Sakura referred to the animal in question as just another animal or by its genus, never once giving it a personified feature like he or her.
"And what would you suggest we do for the patient?" she mused.
"If he was human I'd recommend a catheter-based closure to fill the space. Over a six month period the heart tissue would grow over the filling and naturally close itself. Of course under frequent monitoring and chakra therapy."
"And since he's not human?"
"…I can only save his life for now and watch after him until he passes, making him as comfortable as possible. This guy has a ten to fifteen year lifespan and he's four years short of the decade mark. I'm not validating that humans are more important than other species but if I extend his life for another four years, what would be the purpose? Its sad but…"
Sakura bit her lip as she had begun to close her 'patient' and Tsunade smiled warmly. The girl really did have a way of wording things and understood the weight of life and death in different situations. She was the best student she could have ever taken under wing and felt pride fill her up. She found a brilliantly shining diamond and wasn't going to let her go.
Just as Sakura had finished closing the animal that laid on the scroll, she removed her gloves and leaned her back into a mound of books, content with her work and lazily turned her gaze to Tsunade.
"Done."
"Well done. And with five minutes to spare. Your room doesn't smell too bad. Just air it out and use this." Tsunade said, as she tossed a little can towards Sakura, who clumsily caught it.
"Cherry scented air freshener? For cars?" she asked confusedly.
"Trust me, the cherry scent is so strong it rids the smell of death and decomposition faster than you can say-"
"SAKURA!" Naruto roared as he burst through the room, causing the now alive pig to startle from its slumber and convulse with a heart attack.
"My hard…work…" Sakura mumbled in shock. She couldn't save the pig now. She hadn't slept well the past two weeks and her chakra finally hit the exhaustion point. If it wasn't for her amazing control she would have burnt out in a week. Glancing sadly to the pig she looked down to the floor and felt a little upset.
"Sakura why didn't you tell me? This is unbelievable! That bastard! Sakura I swear I didn't know! I can't believe-"
"Naruto…"
Stopping his raged filled rant, Naruto looked down to Sakura and squatted before her, taking in her tired appearance and felt worried.
"Sakura are you ok? You don't look so good."
With a shaky fist, Sakura punched Naruto in the face and set him flying into the hallway.
"You idiot! Knock before entering places! You killed my patient! Do you have any idea how difficult it was repairing his failed organs?"
Sakura stood up and stomped into the hallway, grabbed Naruto by the collar and had begun to shake him senselessly as she lectured him on the importance of knocking, forgetting how tired she was and somehow finding the energy to move.
Tsunade had silently decided to relieve the pig from its misery when something stopped her as she touched its chest. She felt a rebound of Sakura's chakra surge through it giving the pig a final jolt of life, causing its convulsion to cease and fall back into a gentle slumber as if the heart attack hadn't happened.
"Well that's a technique that surprised me." she laughed and looked towards the young pinkette continuously slap Naruto's already swelling face. Things were definitely going to get interesting from here on out.
