Oh Lord, Oh Lord, what have I done?
I've fallen in love with a man on the run
Oh Lord, Oh Lord, I'm begging you please
Don't take that sinner from me
Oh don't take that sinner from me
Oh Lord, Oh Lord, what do I do?
I've fallen for someone who's nothing like you
He's raised on the edge of the devil's backbone
Oh I just wanna take him home
Oh I just wanna take him home
Ooooooooooo
Ooooooooooo
Oh Lord, Oh Lord, he's somewhere between
A hangman's knot, and three mouths to feed
There wasn't a wrong or a right he could choose
He did what he had to do
Oh he did what he had to do
Ooooooooooo
Ooooooooooo
Devil's Backbone – The Civil Wars
I always believed that killing Clay would be like a lead weight had been lifted of my shoulders, or a boulder being removed from my chest so I could finally breathe. But it didn't feel like that, if I was totally honest for the first time in my life I felt guilty about a kill. I regretted that I took him away from his family and made him pay for his sins.
I know people would think it's weird that I would think like this because I hated Clay, but deep down I also loved him. I grew up with him, I watched everything he did in hopes of one day being exactly like him, wearing a Kutte and being the baddest bitch in town. It was weird for me to feel guilty especially as in my darkest nights stuck in the hospital I would envision different ways in which I could have killed him, like making him beg for death watching as his blood pools on the floor before I finally deliver it to him.
I sigh shaking the dark thoughts away and turn off the small tv in my hospital room and look around at the new flowers that had been delivered whilst I was asleep. I knew who they were from as they were the only ones snuck into the room; my guys brought flowers when I was awake. I knew I'd have to face the sons at some point and try to explain my actions, they might have kicked Clay out but he was still part of their family and I had killed him, killed him without consulting Jax which if I didn't rectify shit soon would turn into a full scale fucking war.
Disney had come around a few times and fussed over me which made me angry, just because I was stuck in a hospital room didn't mean I was some sort of invalid. It took me threatening her and Slash before she got it through her head. I didn't do fucking sympathy; I was a fucking killer for god sake.
"Whoa you look as though you want to kill something"
I look over to see Wolf stood in the doorway of my room, a large bunch of black roses in his hand and a bag of what smells like donuts. I smile at him and he walks in shutting the door behind him, I watch as he places the roses down on a table and hands the donuts to me. I open the bag and pull out a jam one as he sits in the chair next to my bed that Disney had vacated less than an hour ago.
"So what's the damage?" He asks once I've finished my donut and wiped my hands on a paper towel he hands me
"The bullet lodged into the side of my head but missed all major shit, besides the fact that I will probably have bad headaches for a while docs said I should be good to go in about three weeks"
Wolf nods and I see him contemplating something, his dark eyes darkening even more.
"I'm ordering you to rest" he says and I almost balk at his tone but nod and lower my head submissively "You are to become president of Stockton and you are to rest"
"For how long?" I ask my voice a lot more quiet then I would normally have it.
"Not long" He replies and I look up "I know you Chaos and there is no way I could tie you down for a long period of time when Hook is out there somewhere with your name on top of his shit list. So I need you to direct your anger and quick smart brain towards getting this charter up and running"
I nod and let out a small sigh. Sometimes I fucking hated being a nomad, it meant that when the Mother charter came a knocking you fucking answered and did as you were told. If you didn't well you could kiss your patch goodbye.
And right now it looks as though I'm a fucking president which means I can kiss the freedom I had as an enforcer good fucking bye.
"Don't look so put out Chaos" Wolf laughs bringing my attention back to him "It will be three months tops"
"It better be" I growl
"It will" He nods challenging to me to disagree again "But it starts once you get out of hospital and I know you have two more weeks. No arguments Chaos, it's settled. Now I have a few runs up and coming for your guys and girl which will help bring in the money. And the Sons are willing to help"
"Wait what?" I say cutting Wolf off, the shock no doubt written all over my face
"I talked to Jax about what went down and how you had to end it. They were more pissed off that you nearly died in the process then you actually killing Clay" Wolf smirks "Definite princess you are"
"Don't call me that" I growl
"Well when it comes to that club Chaos that is what you are" He shrugs "Anyway as I was saying. The sons are willing to help when you need bodies and also when you need muscles, seeing as you don't really have enforcers at the moment Jax will lend you them"
"Happy?" I say and I know Wolf gets what I mean and by the look in his eyes it's the truth.
Just fucking great, not only have I got to deal with getting a fucking club up and running, making plans to kill Hook but I also have to deal with Happy. Especially after what Clay said it was something that wasn't even on my to do list.
Wolf and I sit and talk a little more before he leaves to go sort out my guys who were on the verge of going stir crazy apparently but also to see how the new club is going and see what needs seeing to. I was thankful for the silence, too much had been put on my shoulders in such short span of time I was starting to loose which way was up.
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
"Now don't do anything too strenuous and if you become in serious pain which is beyond a headache I want you to come straight back here"
I look at Tara as she stands there reeling off all the doctor speech and smile, I can see on her face she knows I won't listen to any of it, but to keep her job she'll tell me it anyway.
"Of course doc" I smirk "I'll make sure to amend all the rules accordingly"
"Nikki" she almost growls at me and I lose my battle with hysteria and burst out laughing, only stopping as a sharp pain erupts behind my right eye. Tara goes to step forward but I raise a hand and breathe through the pain before grabbing my bag from the bed.
"No doubt you'll see me around so you can keep an eye on me"
"Don't be a stranger Nik" She sighs following me out and over to where Slash is stood
"I won't"
We briefly hug and I follow Slash out of the hospital and into the SUV waiting in the parking lot. I didn't care that he picked me up in a cage, after three weeks stuck in a hospital I just wanted out.
"The clubhouse is done" Slash says breaking the silence in the car "Well not completely as it's not even decorated but it's built"
"Wolf kicked some ass I take it" I chuckle
"You bet" Slash nods "I like the new patch you're sporting boss"
"Oh shut it" I glower "It's only temporary"
"You sure?" Slash asks "Are you sure the temporary part isn't you having to rest and not you being president"
"Slash shut your fucking trap before I shut it for you"
He does the sensible thing and shuts his mouth but for the life of me I can't get his words out of his mouth, if I was honest I didn't fully clarify with Wolf which part was temporary but I hope to god he meant my President role, he knows I don't do being tied down, not after the shit storm that was Vegas.
We pull up to the new clubhouse and I watch as all the guys and from the patches on their backs Sons start bringing stuff into the clubhouse. I climb out the car making sure my beanie is situated to cover my head, I was self conscious of the fact that half of my head was shaved off and I had one hell of a scar forming. I walk past them all, my guys and girl giving me nods of respect as their eyes land on my 'President' patch, but I don't miss the mild satisfaction that flickers in all their eyes.
"CHURCH NOW"
I walk into church and watch as they all follow in behind me, I nod to slash to sit on my left and for Shy to sit on my right. Queenie shuts the door and sits down next to Slash and Wheel's next to her with Disney next to Shy.
"You know I don't like sitting in this chair" I start all their eyes on me "But I will not tolerate any of you trying to get one over on me, you know my history and you know I will shoot first and ask questions later"
They all nod and I sigh.
"Hook is out there and he will come for me but we aren't going to stoop to his level. We are going to plan, we are going to strategize, we are going to do things smart. So in the meantime we will do our runs and make some money, we will get this clubhouse going and we will build our ranks"
"Wolf has put trust in all of us to do this" Slash takes over looking at them all and I smile knowing he is the best choice for V.P "We aren't going to let him or Chaos down are we?"
"NO" they all chorus and I nod
"Let's get the future built" I smirk before slamming the gavel for the first time signalling the end of the first official church for the Hell'S Reaper's Stockton charter.
END NOTE – I don't like this chapter but it's needed. From here on out I am going to try and tie every loose end up. But there will still be drama, there will still be fights and bloodshed but this chapter is one step closer to the end.
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