Chapter 9 – Things better left unsaid
Her bones ached. Her scars were red and raw and her body felt stiff. But she was alive. However, right now, Wildpaw didn't feel that alive.
"It hurts," she complained to Magicdance as the medicine cat came over to check her.
"Of course it does and it will only get better if you stop moving," the silver grey she-cat chided.
"But it's cold," Wildpaw mewed sullenly resting her head on her paws.
She stared at the puddle in front of her, "And wet," she added remembering how the rain had poured down the night before.
"But you were dry," Magicdance reminded Wildpaw.
She let out low hiss and sighed. Lying in the medicine cat den for three days was not her idea of fun.
"When can I start training again?" she asked hopefully. She had been asking the same question each day now.
"If you behave yourself, tomorrow," Magicdance concluded her treatment and padded to the sheltered rock ledge. Wildpaw looked around the sheltered den. The fallen rocks provided a perfect shelter for the herbs to be stored. Another leaning rock provided enough room for the two medicine cats to sleep while Wildpaw had bedded down by the herbs. She had been moved from under the pine branches to here when the strong wind had started. Walking was easier now but she had almost become accustomed to the numbing ache. She stared around the den she had been looking at for the past couple of hours.
Boring. There was only one word for it. She was bored.
"Can't I even go outside," she begged as Sagepool entered. Magicdance turned to her patient with practised patience.
"You have to rest."
"I can rest outside," she was persistent. Anything was better than lying in here all day.
She had gained consciousness sometime early morning after the battle. Her wounds had ached and her body was stiff but apart from that she was healthy and ready to go. Fawnpaw and Pouncepaw had visited her numerous times. Ivypaw had also dropped in several times to say hi. After three day Wildpaw was tired of Fawnpaw and Pouncepaw's apologies for abandoning her and for being rude. She had accepted them with good grace and was trying to forget bad memories of the past. But the battle lurked in her mind. Her defencelessness constantly nagged at her consciousness. Navysky had told her it was an unfair fight. Two warriors and an apprentice against her was hardly an equal fight. The huge patrol easily triumphed against the two warriors and their apprentices but when faced with equal numbers all plans were abandoned.
Once all the blood had been cleaned away from her fur the wounds didn't look as bad. They hurt though and her legs had been so stiff. Fawnpaw had also kept asking what she had dreamed but Wildpaw had just shaken her head and told her that she remembered nothing other than the battle.
"Maybe she should be let out," Sagepool took comfort on Wildpaw, "Just into the clearing."
Magicdance was considering it.
"Please," Wildpaw begged, trying to sway her chances.
"All right, but just into the clearing," Magicdance called as she padded out of the den. Wildpaw's tail flickered with excitement. At last she could go outside.
She limped outside only to be dazzled by the bright shaft on sunlight that fell on her. The trees had lost some more leaves that now lay in piles around the clearing. Wildpaw could see Ripplewave resting outside the nursery. Pinebranch was besides her. Staggering to a halt by a sheltering bush she settled down on a mossy clump of grass. She proceeded to devour a robin she had snagged of the fresh kill pile. It was young and scrawny and the feathers tickled her throat, but it was food in her hungry belly. Yawning, her claws slid out and sank into the soft grass. Resting her head on her paws she stared lazily around the camp while her tail flickered. She felt her eyes closing and very soon was lulled into slumber.
"Look at my squirrel; it's bigger than yours,"
"No way, yours just has a bushier tail."
"Well I have a pigeon that is bigger than both of your puny squirrels."
"You didn't catch it, Dewspots did."
"But I scared it out of the tree."
"You got yourself stuck in the process."
Wildpaw rose groggily from her sleep. Gazing around camp she stared towards the camp entrance. Ivypaw, Fawnpaw and Pouncepaw had just arrived home from hunting. Their excited chatter had woken her up. Sighing she closed her eyes again but soon gave up as they bounced over to her.
"Wildpaw, how are you?"
"Are you feeling better?"
"When will you be able to start training again?"
"Calm down," Wildpaw hissed, her tail flicking in the shadows. Pouncepaw kneaded the ground impatiently while Ivypaw lay down besides her and started to eat one of the squirrels.
"How are you feeling?" Fawnpaw asked tenderly making Wildpaw wince. She didn't need her sister's sympathy.
"I'm fine, just a bit stiff," she muttered, blinking as her eyes watered slightly from the sharp jab of pain from behind her neck.
"Can you start training soon?" Pouncepaw tilted his head. His face showed curiosity and Wildpaw smiled.
"Hopefully tomorrow, if Magicdance doesn't change her mind," she meowed.
Ivypaw paused with a mouthful of squirrel in her mouth.
"Whose squirrel was the biggest?" she asked swallowing. With yowls of protest she was sent bowling over as Wildpaw nudged her sharply and Fawnpaw pushed. Wildpaw avoided the flying sand as her sisters scuffled on the ground. Pouncepaw hovered near the back, nervously. Wildpaw gazed at him. So this was the cat that had captured her sister's heart. She twitched her whiskers and nudged the squirrel over to him.
"Have some," she offered. To her delight he ate without complaining like he had the other day. Maybe he can become a LightningClan cat after all.
"You can go and do some light training today," Magicdance mewed. Wildpaw nodded obediently not missing her hint. The sun had risen high in the autumn sky an the frost had stained the grass white. Wildpaw watched her breath puff into a little white cloud before fading.
"Are you coming training today?" Fawnpaw's voice could be heard from the entrance. Walking slowly to avoid the piles of herbs that littered the floor Wildpaw looked for her sister. She saw the familiar brown and white head poking into the den. Sagepool padded up and cleared some old herbs from the floor.
"Take it easy," she warned Wildpaw.
As if I didn't know that.
She turned to Fawnpaw, "Tell my father not to train her to hard. Her leg still needs to heal."
Fawnpaw looked mystified. "Your father?"
Father?
Sagepool turned her gaze away, hiding her expression. "Navysky, he's my father."
Fawnpaw's puzzled expression cleared. Wildpaw looked at Sagepool who had turned her back on the two apprentices.
"Let's go," Wildpaw mewed in Fawnpaw's ear but her sister didn't take a hint.
"Who's your mother?"
The tension crackled like lightning yet Wildpaw was unaware of the reason. Sagepool's fur had risen slightly yet she replied anyway, "Pebbledance."
What was wrong with that?
"What about Nettle...?"
"We need to go," Wildpaw hissed cutting of the end of Fawnpaw's question. Her sister gave her an annoyed glance before turning and stalking out of the den. Wildpaw turned to give Sagepool an apology but found the silver medicine cat emerged in working with herbs. She seemed not to have heard the last comment.
"Sorry," Wildpaw muttered but as she turned away, she saw Sagepool's ears flicker back uncertainly.
She turned towards the sunlight and padded out into the sunlight. Her sister was waiting for her an uncertain expression on her face.
"What did you ask that for," Wildpaw hissed. Mousebrain.
Fawnpaw stuttered, "I-I wanted to know."
"It's private," Wildpaw stared at her sister in confusion.
"But Nettlefur is my mentor, and Navysky is yours,"
"Still,"
Fawnpaw sighed. "I want to know what happened. Is it so bad learning about our clan's history?"
Wildpaw blinked. She hadn't considered this.
"Will you do me a favour and ask Navysky about his daughters? For me? Please?" Fawnpaw begged.
Wildpaw hesitated. Why had Sagepool been so tense when asked such a simple question. She wanted to know.
"Please," Fawnpaw added.
"I'll see what I can do," Wildpaw promised. That way she didn't have to say anything. She had a choice.
"Thank you," Fawnpaw sounded happy. She glanced around the clearing. "I should go. I'll see you later then."
See you.
Wildpaw watched silently as Fawnpaw padded away. What had she just promised?
"Wildpaw? Can you train?" She looked up to see Navysky lying by the fresh-kill pile.
"Yes, I just have to take it easy," Wildpaw replied hurriedly. Navysky blinked.
"How about some battle training then?"
So I can defend myself properly.
Her mentor saw her distress. "It was an unfair fight," he mewed darkly. "You couldn't have done any better than you did."
Wildpaw looked at her paws.
Navysky stretched and clambered to his feet. "Let's see what we can do."
Wildpaw dutifully followed her mentor out into the forest. Her wounds felt better but the raw scars sometimes still felt tender and painful. But she would just have to be brave and endure it if she wanted to be a warrior.
"Duck when he swipes at you. You're small enough to roll underneath. Aim for the belly, one hit can disable your opponent." Navysky shouted orders to her as she battle Emberpaw. They had found him and Pebbledance who had taken over his apprenticeship since Ripplewave moved to the nursery. Navysky had set her up with a duel and had gone to sit by Pebbledance and shouted instructions.
"Roll, don't let him catch you," Navysky cried as Wildpaw tried to avoid Emberpaw's stomping paws. She scrambled upright a tail's length away and stared warily at her opponent.
"Never make the first move," Pebbledance added helpfully, gazing at her apprentice.
"We'll be here all day," Wildpaw joked as she sat down and shook moss from her pelt. She sidestepped quickly as Emberpaw charged and he slid past her only to turn to face her. His hackles were raised as he sank into a stalk and crept forward. Wildpaw backed away cautiously watching what he was doing. She shivered as his threatening stance reminded her of the approaching enemy.
"Concentrate," Navysky's chiding voice brought her back to her senses. She paused, suddenly aware of her back pressed against a tall boulder. Her fur pricked. Emberpaw stalked forward.
She let out a snarl and screeched as she slid forward. Her footpads were outstretched aiming for his legs. She skidded on the wet ground and knocked the surprised apprentice of his paws. He fell onto his side and Wildpaw turned herself around to face him again. She aimed a mock swipe at his ears as they circled each other. Emberpaw swung a sheathed paw when she got to close causing her to back away from his heavy paw.
"Try to overbalance him," Navysky advised, "He's big, knock him over,"
"Are you going to listen to your mentor," snarled Emberpaw, goading her on. Wildpaw hesitated, her ears flickering uncertainly. What should she do?
"You probably should have stayed in the nursery play fighting," Emberpaw hissed. That's it!
Wildpaw's tail flickered and she backed away. She was filled with anger and his snide comments and exhilaration of the fight.
"You probably should pick on someone your own size," she snarled. Then she leapt. Emberpaw moved back in alarm but Wildpaw had bounded to the side. Tailing his one flank she stalked forward, mimicking his move earlier.
Emberpaw turned and threw out a paw but Wildpaw kept moving. Emberpaw missed and he was now wildly off balanced. Circling around the back off him she brought her paws crashing down on his side. She had won. Taking Navysky's advice she had overbalanced him. I'm a warrior.
Pride glowed through her as she turned to face the older cats. A cuff around her ear knocked her forward. She turned to see Emberpaw, his eyes filled with amusement.
"Never think your enemy is defeated until they are." His eyes had lost that hard edge and Wildpaw was happy to have the Emberpaw she knew back.
"Well done," Navysky congratulated. "Nice stalking move there," he told Emberpaw, "Although don't back your enemies into a corner. They tend to panic and make rash decisions," he glared at Wildpaw who was unaffected by the warning.
"I took your advice," she reminded him. Navysky's whiskers twitched with amusement.
"That's what mentor's are here for."
"Can I try that badger attack you showed me the other day," Emberpaw begged Pebbledance. She smiled.
"Of course," she agreed.
"I'd like to see this," Navysky agreed and sat back down, his eyes narrowed against the glare to watch closely.
"Wildpaw, you'll be the badger, Emberpaw's going to try and leap onto your back. Is that all right?"
Wildpaw nodded as she stood in the centre of the mossy clearing. The soft moss was springy underfoot and the towering boulders surrounded the edges.
"Move when he jumps. You don't want Emberpaw landing on you." Pebbledance padded back to where Navysky was sat watching. Emberpaw walked around behind her. She readied herself.
"You make a great mentor," Navysky was mewing.
"Thank you," Pebbledance replied. She pressed her head against Navysky's warm pelt.
"I have something I want to ask you," she mewed quietly and Wildpaw had to staring to hear.
What are you doing? Concentrate!
Paws were approaching from behind slowly.
"You can ask me anything," Navysky nuzzled her fondly.
Pebbledance sighed. "Do you really want me to be your mate?"
Wildpaw was shocked. The paw thuds grew steadier but her thoughts were elsewhere.
Navysky was shocked, "Of course I do, I have three lovely daughters that I love and a loving mate."
"But what about..."
Navysky interrupted before Wildpaw could hear what she was going to say.
"That is past and you are present. I love you more than anything else in the world."
Everything was silent. The paw thuds had stopped. It was all silent. Then the worlds crashed down on her.
"That hurt," she complained to Emberpaw as they headed back to camp.
"Off course it would have. You didn't even move."
"I was distracted," she argued.
"Warriors don't get distracted," Navysky mewed gravely as he turned his head to face her. Wildpaw sighed. How was she supposed to be listening to what the two warriors had been saying and remember to move out of the way of Emberpaw? But then she wasn't meant to be listening in on private conversations.
It wasn't as bad as it could have been. Emberpaw's jump had taken him directly on top of her. It was so well executed that his landing was perfect. It was just in the wrong place. Wildpaw had been so surprised to find a heavy weight pressing her to the ground. Fortunately for her Emberpaw had the sense to leap off her quickly so there was no damage done. She sighed. At least Fawnpaw would be happy with the information. It ought to satisfy her curiosity to prevent her probing around in other cat's matters. Wildpaw blinked sleepily. She would be looking forward to a rest in the apprentice den after all this excitement.
Where was she? After coming back from hunting Fawnpaw had hung like a ghost around camp for her sister. The mystery surrounding Navysky and his daughters was so enticing. Her curiosity would not be satisfied until she could have every ounce of information she could get. The questions just kept coming and she could hardly wait for Wildpaw to arrive back. She tossed a small mouse around impatiently. It was small and she wasn't hungry.
"You shouldn't toss your food around like that," Sloefur advised as the elder padded over to the fresh kill pile.
"Sorry," Fawnpaw muttered and sat down. She took a mouthful of the mouse and her tail twitched impatiently. Her mouse was gone before her impatience was. She then started to pace around the clearing, annoying Ivypaw.
"Stop pacing for StarClan's sake," Ivypaw hissed. Fawnpaw stopped and sat down but she couldn't remain still for long. With a disgruntled hiss her sister turned and padded into their den. Fawnpaw stared after her. Why was everyone annoyed with her? She scraped at the ground impatiently listening for the familiar voice.
"That was great training today you two. Take some food and rest. Emberpaw, you're on the dawn patrol tomorrow."
Fawnpaw looked up at Navysky's voice. She spotted his dark grey-blue fur at the entrance and just behind, her sisters brown tabby pelt. Shifting her weight from paw to paw she waited impatiently. She watched as Wildpaw padded into camp and after grabbing a vole of the pile of fresh kill she padded over to Fawnpaw.
Fawnpaw waited until Wildpaw had settled down before blurting out, "What did you discover?" She watched hesitantly as her sister's ears flickered and after swallowing a mouthful of vole began to talk.
"His mate is Pebbledance," she started and Fawnpaw interrupted quickly, "We all know that," she meowed, "Anything else?"
Wildpaw took the last bite of vole and sat chewing for a while.
"Well," Fawnpaw pressed.
"She wanted to know whether he loved her. She thought he didn't because of something in the past."
"Is that all?"
Fawnpaw was desperate. They were so close yet so far. But she had pushed her sister too much.
Wildpaw's lip curled back. "I mind my own business unlike some cats. I don't want to try to find information for you and then get flattened by the cat I'm meant to be battling."
Fawnpaw took a hesitant step back. She hadn't realised, hadn't thought. The picture of Wildpaw when she lay broken and bloody was still fresh in her mind.
"Thank you," she quietly mewed. Wildpaw sighed and turned around to lick her ruffled fur.
"Come on," Wildpaw sighed as she motioned towards the apprentice den with her tail. Fawnpaw started forward to their warm den as the chill of the night set in.
"Nettlefur, can you go on a patrol with Fawnpaw, Dewspots and Pouncepaw?"
The black warrior nodded. Signalling to Dewspots and their apprentices she turned and headed to the entrance. Fawnpaw trailed behind with Pouncepaw, keeping her eyes open for the chance to ask Nettlefur some questions. Pouncepaw was chattering about something but her thoughts were elsewhere and she didn't hear him when he tried to warn her.
"Look out," he shouted as a tree loomed in front of her. She skidded to a halt but couldn't avoid crashing her nose against it. She rubbed it with one paw.
"Owww," she complained.
"Look where you are going next time," Nettlefur chided as she turned away. Fawnpaw saw Dewspots tail vanish in the distance and she sighed and padded after her mentor.
"Silly mouse-brain," Pouncepaw purred. "Are you all right?" Fawnpaw couldn't miss the concern in his voice. It set her heart ablaze with a burning fire. "I'm fine now," she replied, twitching her nose.
"You look like a rabbit," Pouncepaw joked. He twitched his whiskers when she turned to stare at him.
"Do not," Fawnpaw protested.
"Do,"
"Do not,"
"Do,"
"Be quiet back there," the two apprentices fell silent as Dewspots padded back towards them. He narrowed his eyes and Fawnpaw looked at the ground trying to hide a grin.
"Well, are you coming," the calico tom mewed shortly before turning abruptly round.
"Come on," Fawnpaw muttered to Pouncepaw. He nodded and they bounded forward to catch up with their mentor.
"Do," he whispered playfully as they approached Nettlefur. He ducked as Fawnpaw swiped his ears playfully.
"Stop fooling," the black she-cat hissed, "We're meant to be on a border patrol.
And I'm meant to be asking you questions.
However Fawnpaw remained silent as they padded silently along the riverbank. They spotted no patrol but the scent markers that wafted across the river were still fresh. Dewspots led them towards the cliff, avoiding the waterfall in the distance. Its roar was loud even though they never came that close. The followed the cliff along the border with ShadowClan, stopping to collect a scrap of fallen prey.
"Prey must be stupid," Pouncepaw commented.
"It just didn't know the cliff was there," Fawnpaw commented. "Imagine just running and then..." her voice trailed off. How horrid.
"Have any cats fallen?" Pouncepaw questioned the mentor's.
"Not that I know of," Nettlefur replied, "Dewspots?"
He turned. "There was a cat once. She fell and broke her leg. It healed with time though like all things do."
That's all?
She had expected lots of long stories but none were given.
"It's very rare," Dewspots added as an after thought, answering her mental question. "ShadowClan are very careful near the cliff, WindClan to.
"One of the RainClan elders told the kits that ShadowClan dropped their kittens over the cliff." Pouncepaw mewed, his lip curling.
How cruel! I bet it's a lie. Who would do that?
"Well let's hope we don't find any kits," Nettlefur snapped. Her face showed exactly what Fawnpaw was feeling. She was horrified at the act, and felt sad for the kitten's deaths, despite whether the story was true or not. Pouncepaw took one last glance at the towering cliff top before turning to follow them back into the forest.
Once in the forest Fawnpaw started to put her plan into action. She felt guilty when she let out a false gasp of pain. It wasn't hard and Pouncepaw bounded up to her straight away.
"Are you ok?" he asked nosing her gently.
"I'm fine," she breathed, "Just a thorn; go on ahead, I'll catch you up."
"I'll stay with you," Nettlefur mewed padding over. Yes.
"Do you need help getting it out," she mewed gently. Once again Fawnpaw felt a wave of guilt.
"No, I think it fell out," she lied. "It just hurt." She gave it a quick lick, pretending to get any dirt out.
"Be careful it doesn't get infected," Nettlefur warned.
"My mother would worry," Fawnpaw agreed. Nettlefur turned to go and Fawnpaw stood up.
"You must be so lucky having Navysky as a father," Fawnpaw commented carefully.
"He's a kind and caring father." Nettlefur's voice was level and betrayed no hint of emotion.
"What happened to your mother?" This was it.
Nettlefur visibly tensed. Her ears fluttered nervously but her voice remained calm. Her body was turned away so Fawnpaw failed to see the flash of sadness that crossed her face.
"She died when I was small. I don't remember her. There were no medicine cats as the last one had died only the moon before."
Fawnpaw was filled with a wave of sympathy. How sad.
"She caught green cough and it turned to black cough. She died within a day."
Her voice faded into a stony silence. Fawnpaw lowered her head.
"I-I'm sorry," she mewed quietly.
Nettlefur nodded. "We better catch up with Dewspots," she mewed quietly and bounded away leaving Fawnpaw to her thoughts. She was surprised at the outcome but it just gave her more questions. What about the twin medicine cats? Navysky was their father to. What about Pebbledance? Where did she fit in? Fawnpaw sighed. She had made a little progress but she sensed her mentor had been pushed to far. She didn't want to pry more than was necessary. But how long would it take to uncover the truth. Secrets left to long begin to fester and could cause wounds in her clan. She wanted to bring things out into the light to help understand the world around her a bit more and help understand her clan mates.
