Disclaimer: Stargate is not owned by me, wish it were, but it aint.
Rating: T...some mild swearing.
Spoilers: The Tok'ra Part 1 & 2
Gack, this chapter was a nightmare to write...but I got there in the end...finally! Anyway, I do hope you enjoy "The Tok'ra" (combined both episodes into one chapter). As always, reviews would be lovely, but I just hope you enjoyed it.
It was sandy. Kind of like Abydos, but it didn't have the same…oppressive heat as Abydos. It had been a dream…a vision of sorts that had lead us here. A set of gate co-ordinates left in my mind. A gift from Jolinar. And you don't hand a gift back. No you accept it. And that's what we had to do. Accept this gift. Convincing Jack and the General had been tough, but I think they understand the importance of trying to make contact with the Tok'ra. They were, after all, enemies of the Goa'uld. And you know what they say, 'The enemy of my enemy is my friend.' Of course it rarely works out like that in real life, but we were all hoping that this would be such an occasion where it would actually work out like that.
Before we shipped out I had rung my Dad, but like usual he wouldn't admit how he was really feeling. I knew he was dying from the cancer that had infested his body. But I just wanted him to admit it, admit that he wasn't…infallible. I just wanted him to open up to me. To give me something to remember when he was gone. I mean, he had bought an Apartment in Colorado Springs so that he could be closer to me in...his final days. Though he never actually admitted that that was the reason why had bought it. But yeah, back to the sandy planet.
Jolinar's memories had lead us here, and I hoped…wished that those memories were right. That I was right in bringing us here. We knew that the Tok'ra were a nomadic people, hunted so they moved planets often, we could only hope that they were still here and that us coming here hadn't been a total waste of electricity. Well, it didn't turn out to be a waste of electricity, we did find the Tok'ra, we kind of, as Jack would say "pissed them off" to begin with. I think it was arguing over the differences between the Goa'uld and the Tok'ra, so things were off to a shaky start. A stand off in the sands of some far off planet. In other circumstances it would have been rather humorous. Unfortunately we weren't in another circumstance. We were in this one.
The most shocking part of this all was the fact that I recognized one of them. And not just from passing him in the street. But I knew him. And yet I knew that I had never actually met him. Martouf. He was…something to Jolinar. I recognized a lot of these people, but I knew him most of all. And it was incredibly confusing. I didn't know if I was attracted to him myself, or if it were the memory of Jolinar that was attracted to him. So after finding out who we were, and us finding out who they were. They accused me of killing Jolinar's host, and of killing Jolinar.
And then they lead us to Selmak. One of their eldest and wisest, and they wanted one of us to be host to her. Jack said no. Not that big of a shock, we knew how he felt about them. Daniel said no as well, was a little surprised by that, he was always thirsting for knowledge and he turned that down. Teal'c was out as a Jaffa with a symbiote. And me? I had been through a blending once. I couldn't do it again. It had been hard enough the first time, the thought of doing it again…
And then Martouf invited me to take a walk on the surface whilst the Tok'ra council debated on whether we could be good allies or not. Jack, Daniel and Teal'c were to remain in the tunnels, we were, in effect prisoners. But Martouf wanted to hear about Jolinar. Evidently, Martouf/Lantash were Jolinar and her hosts, Rosha, mate. They loved as one, and they mourned as well. No wonder I was so confused, I was left with the memories and feelings of Jolinar…the feeling of love towards Martouf/Lantash. And even though I love Jack, the emotions that Jolinar had left imprinted on my mind for Martouf…were beyond anything that I could comprehend, they had been together for over 100 years.
Daniel stumbled upon us then, in a sort…moment, not kissing but…sharing our emotions. The Tok'ra high council was being convened for us, and we had to go meet them. They seemed…unwilling, and were stalling when SG-3 showed up. It was my Dad, he was in the hospital and it was serious. General Hammond wouldn't have sent them to extract me if it weren't serious. They wouldn't let me go. We were a security risk. My Dad was dying and I couldn't see him. But they were going to 'try and make us as comfortable as possible'. Like that was at all possible with the knowledge that my Dad was back on Earth dying.
And then we were told why they didn't want to be allied with us, we were unwilling to become hosts. So we were stuck on some god-forsaken sand planet with some snake heads and my Dad was thinking I couldn't be there because I was off fixing some satellite. And then I came up with a way to get us out of here…and save my Dad. Talk to him about becoming a host to a Tok'ra symbiote. Selmak. They let Jack and I go back to earth, and it was nice knowing that he had my six. Literally and figuratively speaking.
Talking General Hammond into it was hard. But Dad was dying, and maybe I was a little clouded in my view but this just seemed an easy to way to save Dad and create an Alliance with the Tok'ra…and save Daniel, Teal'c and SG-3. The General eventually allowed me to talk to Dad. But that actually involved me getting him to believe what the Stargate program actually was. He was actually willing to give it a go. Well, to at least consider the idea.
Arriving back at the planet, my father with Jack and I we were a little surprised to not find any Tok'ra waiting for us. As we soon found out the System Lords had been informed of the Tok'ra's presence on this planet and had dispatched two motherships to destroy them. Dad and Selmak got along okay, surprisingly well, and after talking to the host and telling me only had two options. Death, or this. And Death was unacceptable to him. He decided to go ahead with the blending, though Selmak wanted to get to know him a bit more before she accepted him as a host. After she had decided she liked my 'teddy bear' of a father, he did something I didn't expect. He got all sentimental on me, telling me how proud he was of me, and I knew he wasn't good at that sentimental stuff, heck he even admitted it himself, so coming from him, it meant a lot.
After Dad and Selmak blended, we were not to move him until Selmak had completed her repairs of my father's body. But the Goa'uld were coming and all the other tunnels had been…de-grown, we had to evacuate. Martouf offered to stay with Dad until he awoke, but I couldn't leave him. Jack…well, he was pretty pissed off, I could see he was. He didn't want me to die for nothing, and we couldn't even say a proper goodbye, though we both hoped that it wasn't, we both understood it was a possibility.
And then Selmak was awake, the repairs on his body were complete, and not just the Cancer, but his Arthritis was gone as well. Boy, was he pleased with that. We had to leave immediately, the tunnels were collapsing around us, and if we didn't move now we would be absorbed…killed in other words. We only just made it in time to the ring device as well, and it was close dialing the Stargate, we had no idea whether it was us dialing out or the Goa'uld dialing in. We had to take a leap of faith. Die in the wormhole, or risk being captured and tortured by the Goa'uld. We took the wormhole…and clanged onto the gate ramp.
Dad seemed pretty happy, considering he was now sharing his body with a 2000 year old Tok'ra symbiote. But I knew that I had made the right decision when Dad told me he loved me. He had never said that before to me. Score one to Selmak. But it was over all too soon. Garshaw, Martouf and Dad had to go to the new Tok'ra homeworld, and move worlds again to stop the Goa'uld from potentially tracking them. It was hard saying goodbye to him, but I knew Martouf would keep his promise, to me…and to the memory of Jolinar.
It wasn't until much later that night until I realized that Jack had barely said a word during the debriefing, and when we were dismissed he stalked out without so much as a backward glance at me. I did go looking for him, albeit on the quiet, just pretended to be wandering aimlessly as I searched out the usual places, the gym, the mess, his private quarters…even my office. Eventually I asked a passing airman if he had seen 'The Colonel', and was informed that he had left the base. Bastard.
"Colonel!" I yelled as I bashed on the door again, "What the hell is wrong with you?" I spat at him as he opened the door, his face set in grim mask
"Captain." He grated out as I barged past him, "Been kissing any snake heads lately?"
"What!" Shocked to the core at what he was insinuating, "You think I kissed Martouf, you think that little of me that I would do that?"
"Daniel said he found you in a 'moment' with him, and I saw the way he was looking at you…crap I screwed up didn't I?" Jack said as he shut the door and slumped against the wall.
"Jack, I love you, though sometimes I wonder why. I could never betray you, not willingly at least." I said as I closed the distance and raised his head to meet my gaze, "Jack, I was confused, I had…have, all these memories of him, feelings…left behind by Jolinar, it's confusing as all hell to have them there, coz I know they are not my memories, and not my feelings, but I still remember them and feel them."
"Shit…Sam, I'm so sorry…" he mumbled as drew me into his body and buried his head in my shoulder as he muttered apology after apology.
"No need to apologise, I can see why you would be upset." I finally said after an eternity of just holding him.
"I shouldn't be upset though, I trust you…I just…jealousy is horrible thing." He finally admitted as I gave a small giggle, "No giggling Captain." He admonished as he looked into my eyes.
"You were jealous…of what exactly?" I asked as I ran my fingers through his hair, messing it up more than it already was.
"Well…he just…I'm…well, I just don't see how I could ever measure up to a guy like that…" he said haltingly as I stared at him.
"What?" I finally managed to get out, as he gave a wry smile.
"Well, you know, he's…smart and handsome and…well, young…I mean, I know he isn't young but he looks young and I'm…not…" he shifted uncomfortably under my gaze as my hands dropped from his hair.
"You're not…young, smart or handsome?" I clarified as Jack gave a stupefied nod as he slid away from the wall, and away from me, "Now hang on second here Jack, you're going to damn well listen to this."
I gave a deep breathe before I launched into my diatribe, "I Love You, I have always, and will always love you. You are the only one for me. To me you are smart, you are handsome, and whilst you may be a bit older than me, I don't care about that. Never have. Never will. So, just…get over it." I spat out as he grinned sheepishly as he strode towards me and swept me into a giant hug.
"I don't deserve you, but you love me anyway…" He mumbled into my ear as he nuzzled my neck affectionately.
"Yeah…sure…" I replied as he started walking me towards the couch, both of us laughing as we toppled onto it with me laying sprawled across his chest.
"So how you coping?" he asked suddenly after we had shifted so that we laying on our sides, with our legs tangled together, our faces mere centimeters apart.
"Okay, I guess…it's not everyday your father becomes host to a 2000 year symbiote…but, this is our second chance Jack…I get a second chance to get to know my father." I replied honestly he gave me a gentle nudge, "Okay, it's kinda weird…really weird, but I did suggest it, so yeah."
"God you're amazing Sam." He said as he brushed his lips tenderly over mine, smiling as he leant back again.
"I know." I grinned broadly as he gave a small chortle, as I snuggled into his chest.
"You scared me today you know…when you stayed behind…" Jack said quietly as he stroked my hair.
"I did?"
"mm-mm, I knew it was going to be close…maybe too close…" Jack was hugging me so tightly, his arms wrapped securely around me as he slung a leg over my hips.
"I couldn't leave Dad…" I whispered as I stroked his chest my fingers gently working their way downwards to rest on his narrow hips.
"I know…waiting in that Gate room for you to come through…I felt like my whole world was about to collapse in on me." I leaned back as I stared into his chocolate eyes, as they glistened with unshed tears, "But you did come through…you came back…"
"Always." I mumble as I leant my head back into his chest. It had been a long couple of days, and sleep had been infrequent and fitful in that time. I was so very tired as I gave a small yawn, Jack's hands, those beautiful, gentle hands began stroking my back as sleep overcame both of us.
"Hi, you've reached Aertyn - Fluff Monster, please leave a message after the tone..."
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So, hopefully I'll get time tomorrow to write up "The Fifth Race"...that will be alternating POV's, between Jack/Sam and maybe even Daniel...maybe, we'll see how it goes.
