Chapter 12: If I Die Young
The drive to Mel's Diner on Sunset, right in the middle of Hollywood. It was quite the drive from Peyton's old house, but Kevin, Norah, and her had all gone to school in the heart of Los Angeles and they lived in Hollywood at the school. Peyton had never had the money to live on campus, nor did she want to leave her mother alone.
Peyton was dressed in her usual attire; skinny ripped jeans, a long yet fitted red and white baseball shirt, and a black hooded sweater. Her vans were on her feet and her hair was down instead of it's usually pony tail.
As she got out of the car, she saw all the boys dressed similarly. Each wore jeans and designer shades but she noticed how their personality seemed to shine through their clothes. Reid had on his usual black v-neck t-shirt and red hoodie. He had on a black beanie and his fingerless gloves that matched. It was a unique style that only Reid could really pull off.
Tyler and Pogue were dressed similarly. Both had white crew neck shirts on but while baby boy had a Lacoste green polo over his shirt, Pogue wore his plain with just his usual leather jacket, looking like an edgy biker boy, as per usual.
Peyton couldn't help but notice how good Caleb looked. Maybe it was because they were in sunny California or maybe it was just because it was break, but Caleb was looking better than ever in her eyes.
Wearing jeans and sandals, just like the rest of the boys, Caleb was wearing a white wife beater top and a very nice linen button done shirt that was a black. He had it buttoned up to his mid chest and the sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. His skin was tan and the thin shirt couldn't hide his lean and muscular figure. He looked like a God, an Adonis in Peyton's eyes. She couldn't help but stare at how perfect he was.
"C'mon Peyton!' Pogue called out to her as she stood there, still admiring Caleb as he walked with the group towards the diner. Knowing she had been caught, Peyton flushed bright red as she ran to catch up with her cousin. Reid held the door open and the boys let her in first where she was followed by Caleb, Tyler, Pogue, than Reid.
Peyton walked in timidly, unsure of where to look for her friends. Seeing no one seated at the bar, the girl immediately turned her eyes to the back corner of the restaurant, the farthest booth in the room. Sitting there in the plush red faux leather booths were the tall and lean brunette boy and mocha bright eyed girl she had been missing since she had left her home in L.A.
"Oh. My. God!" Norah squealed in a high pitch decibel, nearly shattering all the glass in the room. Jumping up, catching the attention of every customer in the restaurant, Norah leaped over the booth and ran into the arms of Peyton. Both girls giggled and hugged each other while jumping around, making quite the scene.
When they had finally jumped maybe a billion times, Norah let go of Peyton giving Kevin the small window of space he needed to maul down his long lost friend. He lifted her off her feet and spun her around. Once her feet were neatly settled back on the ground, Kevin swooped in and gave her a big kiss on her soft lips.
There was nothing slow or romantic about the kiss, but it was still enough to make Caleb's stomach churn. His blood boiled and the need to break the boy who had his hands over his girl was overwhelming.
His girl? Where did that come from? Peyton wasn't his girl, but his natural instinct was to protect his girl, to make her safe and to keep her by his side. He couldn't help but watch with envy as Peyton clung to the guy whose hands were wrapped tightly around her waist and whose face was buried deep in her hair. It was the place that Caleb wanted to be. A place he had thought would be his.
"Guys,' Peyton turned to the four sons of Ipswich, her hands still wrapped around Kevin's waist, who in turn had his arms were around her neck as Norah looked on fondly. 'This is Norah and Kevin. My L.A. best friends."
"L.A. best friends?" Of course Norah who was so outgoing and a diva would find that to be an insult.
"Yes. My L.A. best friends. And these are my childhood best friends.' Peyton released her grip on Kevin and pointed to each of the boys in turn. 'This is Tyler Simms, Reid Garwin, my cousin Pogue Parry, and Caleb Danvers."
"The pleasure is all mine." Kevin came forward looking Pogue up and down, smiling at what he saw.
"Cool it Kev,' Peyton giggled at her cousins bewildered reaction to the leering gay boy. 'He's straight." Kevin then traded his flirtatious smile for a sour pout as he turned back to the table. The rest of the group laughed and Caleb felt the pit in his stomach shrink, pleased at learning that the Kevin was gay and not into Peyton in a romantic way.
Everyone made their way to the table, taking seats around the circular table in the booth. Peyton, the common denominator, was seated in the middle sandwiched by Caleb and Kevin. Norah was on Kevin's other side flirting away with Tyler and Reid.
After they ordered their food, the awkwardness of the situation had died down. The boys were now pestering Norah and Kevin for details or embarrassing stories of Peyton in the years that had missed with her being away. All through the meal, the entire group laughed at Peyton's expense while Kevin and Norah reminisced about all the good times that had had.
"And then, out of no where, the police show up and Peyton is just standing there in the middle of the room holding the megaphone and the bag of chips looking like she had just seen a ghost!" Norah couldn't help but laugh as she finished her sentence. Peyton turned bright cherry red at her memories of the time she had been caught by the police for sneaking into the animal shelter.
"Look, those dogs were seriously underfed.' Peyton attempted to explain her actions over the roars of laughter. But it did no good since all it did was make them laugh harder. 'They needed the chips! They're fattening! It would've made them gain weight!" The laughter died down after a few minutes and then Kevin had to add on.
"The best part was when we were all at the station after being arrested and your mom was there arguing that you were just doing the humane thing! Julia was in the captains face and yelling at him. Funniest shit ever." Giggles had started but Peyton's face contorted into a look of pain than sadness at the reminder of her mother.
One of her favorite memories of Julia had been the night she had come down to bail out the three kids and had said they had done the right thing. That memory of her mom shushing her in the morning because she was trying to apologize for her actions. Her mother assured her she had done much worse back in her day (including getting pregnant).
One look at Peyton's face shushed the entire group silent. The girl was looking down at her plate, hoping that direct contact with her burger would keep the tears away. So far it wasn't working and everyone was looking at her with sorrow and pity.
"Fuck Peyton.' Kevin began to whine in apologize. 'I'm so sorry, I never meant to..."
"It's okay Kevin." Peyton assured him that all was well. She had to get used to these moments because they were going to happen. Now and then someone would say something to remind her of her dead mother and she had to be able to grin and bare it. But for now, she wasn't sure she could.
It almost startled her when a large warm hand covered her own as they were on her thighs under the table. It lay flat on top of her flat hand and when the fingers of the foreign part came into contact with the spaces between her small fingers, they slipped down, taking them into a grip.
Down, atop her thigh, Peyton had a warm comforting hand to hold. The tan fingers stayed locked with hers as the thumb made slow and tender circles on the back of her pale hand. She couldn't help but stare at the gesture, a secret action that no one else at the table knew besides herself and Caleb.
When she looked up into his face, concern was written all over it. Caleb's eyes looked down at her with such warmth and need that she felt herself blush. She couldn't fathom what he thought of her. Even though all she wanted to do was turn and look away, she couldn't help but stare back into his coffee eyes with her own, bewildered and awed by his touch.
Though the rest of the table had gone back to talking, the two sat there lost in each others eyes. Peyton and Caleb were in their own little world, which suited them just fine.
o0o
After lunch the crew hit the sites. Because it was the boys' first time to L.A. they wanted to play tourists and Kevin, Norah, and Peyton were happy to oblige. Rodeo Drive, Beverly Hills, the Hollywood sign, the Chinese and Kodak theaters, the walk of fame, Santa Monica, and the pier were the priority destinations. And, thanks to the limo that had been hired to drive around the sons of Ipswich and their companions, they were all able to go anywhere they pleased at anytime.
The three days went by with such speed, it was almost hard to believe spring break was coming to an end. They had done everything they had wanted to do, but none of the teens were tired. Their boundless energy would die once they reached Ipswich again...school did that to kids.
On their last night, the boys, Peyton, Kevin, and Norah had a bonfire dinner at the beach. They had surfed (or in the boys case, attempted to surf) before the sun went down, and now as dusk settled upon the sand, a large pile of drift wood burned with a rabid fire, copying the color of Peyton's hair. At one point, Reid had thrown his sweater atop her head in attempt to save her 'from her hair burning.' The joke was well received which to Caleb and Pogue's dismay, only further boosted the blonde's ego.
After hotdogs on the beach, the group began to roast marshmallows for s'mores. Pogue had noticed that his best friend had spent the better part of the evening staring at his cousin. Caleb had been staring at her with such an intensity, the same glare he saw his father give his mother at dinner sometimes. It was a look he didn't fully understand and while he wanted to ask about it, the shaggy haired boy knew better than to ask Caleb right there in front of Peyton.
Kevin had brought his guitar and he and Norah took turns singing as Peyton played. Caleb was amazed to see that she could play the guitar as well as the piano. It wasn't as good as her piano playing but it was amazing especially because Caleb couldn't play any instrument at all.
"Okay girl, your turn!" Norah nudged Peyton in the shoulder. The open and fun girl immediately shut down, disagreeing with the idea. Too bad the crowd didn't agree. They rambled and argued that she should preform for them.
"I can't sing! I can barely play the guitar!' The girl was searching for excuses. 'I play and write for the piano. That's it."
"Seriously?' Norah started with a sarcastic tone, leaving Kevin to finish for her. 'We know that's a lie, so sing or..."
"Or what?" Peyton knew an empty threat when she saw one.
"Or... We'll throw you into the ocean!" Both Kevin and Norah made to grab her, sending Peyton screaming in self defense. After the brazen attack, she gave in and settled back into her seat preparing to be humiliated.
"No laughing." The group swore not to make fun of her though she doubted any of them would keep their word. Grabbing the guitar she just started strumming, letting the music come to her, and when it felt good, she just sang.
If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
oh oh oh oh
Lord make me a rainbow, I'll shine down on my mother
She'll know I'm safe with you when she stands under my colors, oh and
Life ain't always what you think it ought to be, no
ain't even grey, but she buries her baby
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I've had just enough time
If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I've had just enough time
And I'll be wearing white when I come into your kingdom
I'm as green as the ring on my little cold finger
I've never known the lovin' of a man
But it sure felt nice when he was holding my hand
There's a boy here in town says he'll love me forever
Who would have thought forever could be severed by
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I've had just enough time
So put on your best boys and I'll wear my pearls
What I never did is done
A penny for my thoughts, oh no I'll sell them for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'
If I die young bury me in satin
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
The ballad of a dove
Go with peace and love
Gather up your tears, keep 'em in your pocket
Save them for a time when your really gonna need 'em oh
The sharp knife of a short life, well
I've had just enough time
So put on your best boys and I'll wear my pearls
When she was done the group clapped. Norah even wiped her tears away. Both she and Kevin would recognize the song as something she had written last summer, using suggestions from Julia. It was a song her mother and her sort of wrote together, a song that was so dear to her, and she felt closer to her mother just by playing it.
"My turn!" Reid nabbed the guitar out of Peyton's hands and began strumming away though he didn't know what he was doing. He began to make up ridiculous lyrics that mocked everyone but sent the group into tears due to laughing so hard.
When she felt no one was looking, Peyton slipped away from the group. Having rolled up her jeans to her knees and wearing only a grey t-shirt, she walked barefoot on the shore, walking far enough away that she could be alone in her thoughts, but close enough to see the fire and hear the giggles. The image grew smaller as she walked, and she was enjoying the peace and serenity the beach and ocean offered her as she sat in the sand with her arms around her knees.
She didn't know how long she sat there in the cold air, but she was beginning to shiver a bit from the wind. Without warning, a large jacket was draped over her shoulders and pulled closely around her. Caleb than sat next to her in his jeans and white shirt in the same position she was in.
"Aren't you cold?" Peyton felt bad for having his jacket. She should have thought to brought one, but it never crossed her mind as this was a spontaneous walk.
"Nah.' Caleb's voice was silky and rough at the same time. Rather than startle her, it seemed to sooth her, making her churn under his words. 'Just wanted to be sure you were okay." He looked at her intently, but she forced her gaze to be on the sea.
"I'm fine... I'm fine." It was a reflex to have those words come tumbling out of her mouth. They were the same ones she had been saying for the past 4 months. Everytime someone asked her if she was okay, this was her response. Peyton said it so much that she was convinced it was the truth. But here, with only the sound of the water rushing onto the sand and the faint noise of her friends having fun, she was lost in her own thoughts, forced to face them for the first time. That's when the tears came and the truth she had been holding back for so long came tumbling out.
"I'm not okay." she started to shake as she cried. Her hands came up to cover her face as Caleb pulled Peyton into his arms, letting her sob against his chest. One of his hands rubbed her shaking back and the other smoothed out her long hair. Over and over again she said she wasn't okay, and Caleb just allowed her to cry all the tears that needed to be shed.
She cried for a while, but after some time, the tears began to slow down until she was dried up. Peyton pulled away from Caleb who still left one hand on her back. Her piercing eyes met his and as one single tear rolled down her warm face, Caleb's hand came up to brush it away but didn't move his hand once it was gone.
Caleb's hand stayed cupping Peyton's face, as the other moved to do the same to the other side. The eye contact was intense but neither could look away. Peyton's hands were still on her lap and she felt she couldn't move or do anything but stare at the boy in front of her.
Slowly and gently, Caleb pulled her face towards his as he leaned in. He was deliberately slow, giving her plenty of time to stop what was about to happen. When Peyton didn't object, he brought her pink lips close to his and captured them in a smooth and tender kiss. It seemed to last forever, and when they broke apart, it took only a second before they gently kissed again and again.
There was nothing lustful or passionate about their kiss. It was chaste, innocent, and careful. They were just slow long kisses that sent shivers down both their spines. Peyton's heart began to race faster than it ever had and Caleb could feel his own matching it. Everything was in the kiss, everything and more. It seemed to go on forever which suited both parties just fine.
Just as Peyton was about to use her hands to pull Caleb closer to her, they were interrupted.
"Peyton! Caleb!" Norah's voice could be heard from the fire. Her cries were followed by more shouts which forced the two to jump apart, shocked and uncertain of what had just happened.
Caleb popped up first, stammering to give an excuse.
"Well, I should..."
"Yea. Me too." Peyton didn't need him to say it. He was acting jittery, almost as though he was guilty. Maybe he was regretting the kiss? That was enough of a thought to make her feel embarrassed.
With a nod of his head, Caleb took the coat that Peyton had handed to him and without a word, turned and walked away. He trudged with determination back towards the others as Peyton stared at his back.
Carefully, Peyton raised her hand to touch her swollen pink lips, relishing the memory of Caleb's lips on hers. She looked to the ocean, feeling the blood rush to her face. Standing there waiting until her cheeks felt less flushed she came to a conclusion of her racing thoughts.
"Peyton! Come on baby girl!" Pogue's voice pulled her out of her thoughts. Looking back at Caleb, who was already with the group, she realized that even though Caleb regretted the kiss, she didn't. He would probably prefer it never had happened, let alone let everyone else know what had gone on in their absence.
Even though the girl would never forget that kiss, as Peyton began walking back to camp, she swore to herself she would never tell or talk to anyone about what had happened. And, with a painful resolve, she began to walk back towards the people she loved with a secret in the back of her mind.
o0o
Hey! So there's the next chapter. The song is "If I Die Young" by the Band Perry. Just heard it and it inspired me to write away! Thanks to all those who have added me as an favourite author and/or this story to your favourite list. Again, if you haven't, take a look at my homepage to see pictures of my characters. Also, please please please please review! You haven't a clue how your brilliant reviews make this story. Without them, I cannot write. So please, let me know what you think.
xoxoxo Ash
