AN: This chapter might be the darkest chapter in the story. In this chapter there will be rape committed. If you are affronted or affected by this theme in any special way, please do not read it. I have been thinking twice about posting this chapter the way it is, but this story is rated M for reason. And I feel that there has to be a part in the story that has to show how cruel and inhuman the war was and how Voldemort was able to spread fear in the way he did.
Chapter 12
- Fear-
I had passed out again. When I woke there was thick darkness. I groaned.
„Sadra?"
„Dorcas?"
„Yes." she breathed.
„Where are we?"
"I don't know. I heard screams, but now everything is silent."
„I can't move." I grunted, the cords cutting into my wrists. "Where are Lily and James? For Merlin's sake- Harry!"
"Shht, don't mention him!" Dorcas hissed.
„But where are they?"
„I don't know. Not here."
We heard a loud, blood-curdling scream. It sounded like James.
"No. They are torturing him." Dorcas whispered. "He must remain strong."
"Where is Sirius?"
"Hell, I don't know. I am in this dungeon just as long as you are. You would be better of worrying for yourself. Sirius knows how to take care of himself."
I felt sick. I really loathed this bitch. Who did she think she was talking to me like that? But starting a fight between us would be the most stupid thing even I had ever done. So I bit my lip. How long had we been here? What was going to happen to us? This was exactly one of these situations Sirius referred to, when he advised me to go back home to my parents playing rueful pure-blood.
Now a woman screamed on top of her voice, a man roared, but the voices seemed to be unfamiliar. We heard footsteps. My gasping breath quickened. The door was pushed open. Light flooded through the dungeon. It was empty expect for me and Dorcas and a person that had died a long time ago. His skull was covered with shreds of decaying flesh, one eye was missing, the other one starred at me rotten and questioningly. I turned with a cry.
Someone grabbed my hair and pulled me up, the cords hurting badly. My robes were covered in blood and dirt. My heart was beating so fast, I had the feeling it would stop any second,
just because it was getting too fast.
The masked Death Eaters pushed me to a dim-lit room with high ceilings. It was full of shadowy shapes. It was unnaturally cold. A blue fire was burning in a corner of the room. It took my eyes a while to adjust to the spare light. But then I saw him.
He was exceptional tall, slim and so white he seemed to shimmer in the twilight. His face looked like a snake. He had no real nose, it were more two slits in his face, his pupils almost vertical. A red gleam seemed to radiate from them.
I couldn't believe my eyes. This was him- Lord Voldemort. I knew this was my death sentence. Few, who saw him had survived to tell the tale. I must be in his Headquarter. He stared at me unblinkingly. I was nothing but fear.
"Miss Burke, I assume?" His voice was cold and high, but sophisticated.
I nodded. I was dead, lies would not change a thing. I wanted to die with my head held high. Sirius should be proud of me.
"Miss Burke. What a pleasure." He smiled. "And what a pleasure. I wasn't misinformed when I was told you are an incredible beautiful witch. Unfortunately, you don't seem to value the last factor.
Where were James and Lily? I looked around.
"Gone, Miss Burke." Merlin, was he able to read my thoughts?
"Regrettably, Mr. Potter seems to know a few tricks, he didn't learn from his dear teacher by any chance." The surrounding crowd laughed. "He disappeared with his precious wife while my Death Eaters tried to apparate them here. It seems he only feigned unconsciousness. A trick unworthy for a man, but nonetheless effective to overcome my inept Death Eaters."
His gaze lingered on four Death Eaters lying on the floor in a distant corner, moaning and grunting.
This had been the screams! My heart leapt with joy.
"So happy, Miss Burke? There is no reason for happiness. Potters will die sooner or later. Later than you, Miss Burke, but surely sooner than they intend to."
He turned to face Dorcas.
"Miss Meadowes. I heard from you. Filthy mudblood." He made a little movement with his wand and Dorcas head was slammed against the nearby wall, causing her to scream out.
"Miss Burke, you will soon recognize that it does matter, what kind of blood runs through your veins. In life and in death."
I stared at him. I wouldn't stand a cat's chance in hell. He would kill me.
"But before I will teach you this valuable lesson, I am going to ask you some questions."
He snapped his fingers and the cords vanished. I massaged my wrists. I looked up at him, my gaze now proud and furious.
"And I want you to tell me the truth, otherwise you will have to suffer my displeasure." She might be an adequate reward for a worthy Death Eater.
I nodded.
"Why are you betraying our kind? Why did you have to pick Sirius Black of all men? You broke your dear parents' hearts." He eyed me interested.
"I love him." I shrugged.
"Now, this is sweet. But where is he? Seems like Romeo left his Juliet all alone here, went home and is seeking pleasure in the arms of another mudblood-whore. Like he usually does."
He was provoking me.
"Do you really think, Miss Burke, you are the first woman he lulled with his sweet talk about love? Do you really think you were the only one he slept with during the last years?"
My body tensed. This was ridiculous. But here, in the twilight I wasn't able to feel the same confidence in him I used to feel.
"He even cheated on you with this little moodblood over there, right?" Dorcas nodded.
"You should think about it, my dear. Here with us you would be valued for your beauty and ancestry. Here is no one who would use your pure body for his pleasure and then throw it away. Your children fathered by a pureblooded Death Eater would be most precious."
I shook my head. I was fighting to remember the last weeks, even hours. He loved me and only me. These were dirty tricks and Dorcas surely acted under the Imperius curse.
"So you love him. And why- pray tell- does the purity-hater Black choose a pureblooded woman?" Voldemort asked his entourage suddenly.
"I will tell you. He doesn't hate purebloods after all. He likes to take those muggle-whores, who offer themselves so frequently to him, but the truth is, my friends, he is much closer to us than all of you think. He wants to father a child, this Black, a son, now his father and brother have died. And who would be more suitable to receive the son and heir of the Blacks than this woman?"
"He is adventuresome, but in his heart his is a true Black, his soul so dark like his dear brothers'." Voldemort laughed out cruelly. His gaze again lingered on the four Death Eaters in the corner who still fought the aftermath of the Crucatius- curse.
"And now, Miss Burke- now you are going to tell me about the Order of the Phoenix." He crossed his arms and sat on the edge of a huge nearby table.
I was confused. Did he just try to imply that Sirius was a Death Eater? That's bullshit. But how did Voldemort knew about his wish for a child? And what was the Order of the Phoenix?
I shook my head. Voldemorts eyes bored into mine.
"You don't even know what I am talking about. Tss tss, Black is so smart. He didn't even tell you that he is a double-agent for us in Dumbledore's secret society?" He laughed cold.
"Unfortunately, your abilities seem to be less than your looks." He turned to Dorcas again.
"Now it is your turn, little Order-slut."
I felt I was shackled again. His insults were burning like fire in my face. What was this Order-thing? I really never heard of it, Sirius never mentioned it. The last summer popped into my mind. Sirius in St. Mungos.
"Dorcas here- the little Black-slut- she knows what the Order is, right?"
He was baby-talking to her. Dorcas shook her head.
"Didn't you promise to stick with the truth?" He slapped her with movements of his wand.
"Talk!" There was no patience in voice. Dorcas remained silent. She endured his violence, even when he started using the Cruciatus- curse on her. Her screams echoed in my head, but she didn't answer his questions. Why didn't anyone come to our rescue? They didn't know where we are, sure. Nobody would find us. We were going to die here.
"Well, my dear. Now it is going to become unpleasant for you." Voldemort was talking to me. "Your friend doesn't want to talk to me. Maybe it will loosen her tongue to see how I torture you?" He laughed.
"If she is sleeping with my man, this won't work, I am afraid."
"That's the way love goes." He grinned.
I only felt pain beyond pain, there is no way to describe the feeling of this curse. I heard myself screaming.
"Say it! Say it, Burke! Tell me about the Order? Who is member?"
"I…don't…know." I panted. "I never heard of it!"
Voldemort shook his head. "Has anyone ever seen two witches so stubborn?"
He quickly turned. "Maybe this will help."
I felt it on my body and saw it on Dorcas'. Our robes had vanished. We were lying on the cold floor completely naked. I cried out. It was the same little charm Sirius so often had used in bed.
The Death Eaters surrounded us greedily.
"Friends, in the corner over there are some Death Eaters that disappointed me severely tonight. I tortured them, yes. But is this enough punishment for allowing the Potters to escape? I don't think so. Now looking at these two young, voluptuous bodies, who were nice enough to undress already, a thought crossed my mind. I say: The Death Eater who punishes his failing fellows in a way that satisfies me, is allowed to regale himself with one of those."
I groaned, Dorcas wasn't moving at all. This could not be happening! I had a horrible nightmare and I would be waking any second in my bed.
The Death Eaters darted at their fellows in the corner. I couldn't see what was happening. I heard screaming, yelling, crying, sometimes even laughter. There was a female voice amongst those who were tortured. I had to get out of here! He was not just going to kill me, he was going to torture me to death. Every attempt to move, failed miserably. Merlin, what could I do?
Sirius was raging. Dumbledore wasn't able to calm him down. The relief that Lily and James managed to escape, was completely ignored because of his outburst. He howled like a wounded animal. They had tried everything, but no one knew where Sadra and Dorcas had been taken. They searched everywhere, activated all of their informants, but still there was nothing. He must have taken them to his Headquarters whose whereabouts were currently unknown.
They were in Godric's Hallow now, Sirius had smashed half of the living-room interior. James looked at him. He could feel with his friend, but it didn't reach his heart entirely. There was too much happiness in there that he had managed to rescue Lily. She was upstairs, sleeping. Harry was with her. If he had been in Sirius' position now…They had fucked up completely. The whole stupid trip had been their stupid selfish idea of catching the spy at ease.
Remus stood next to James. He looked with sympathy at Sirius, who had just started to have a go again at Dumbledore:
"If she had known about the Order, at least! He will ask her about it and when she can't tell him anything, he will kill her! It is all your fault, Albus!"
"Even if she knew, she would have to remain silent, otherwise she would have been a bad choice for the Order." Dumbledore retorted.
James hated the old man for his composure. He should scream at Sirius, blame him; this would help him.
"This fucked-up-Order! It is my girl we are talking about here und only because she is not in your fucking-club she doesn't count or what?" Sirius continued his accusations.
"I never said that, neither will you ever hear me saying things like this. We are doing the best we can." Dumbledores voice was calm.
Moody and Fenwick entered the room.
While Moody just grabbed Sirius in his arm to calm him, Fenwick said:
"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. No trace whatsoever. No Death Eater is where he ought to be. They are all gone. Must be Headquarters. There is nothing we can do."
"It is my fault! I should never have allowed her to stay at my side!"
Sirius felt on his knees, crying bitterly.
Tears had started to stream down my face. Dorcas still wasn't moving. Don't let her be dead. Or let her be dead? I didn't know what to hope for her. The uproar on the other side of the room was finished as Voldemort called: "Enough. I chose a winner."
What was he up to? He returned with his Death Eaters on the heels to us.
Voldemort called five persons towards himself next to Dorcas. The rest formed a circle, enclosing me.
"Well, you have proved to be a loyal servant to your Lord. You cherish my wishes higher than those of your companions. Take the moodblood!"
I gasped for breath.
"But my Lord," one of the Death Eaters said. "What about the pureblood? Isn't she supposed to be the prize for the winner?"
Voldemort smiled cold. "Do you really think I would reward one of you sadistic persons with a witch, whose blood is purer than any other in this room? There is no mood in her blood. I will think about what fate she will face." The last sentences sounded nearly tender.
I sobbed. Voldemort looked at me and suddenly I was dressed again.
"Now- take the moodblood, your comrades are waiting."
He sat on the edge of the table again. He didn't seem to be affected by the scene. He hadn't shown concupiscence at the sight of our naked bodies. He wasn't interested in the upcoming horror-scenario, he looked as if he was already plotting his next steps.
Two Death Eaters clutched Dorcas at her wrists and ankles, parting her legs brutally. She screamed. I felt a wave of nausea again. A Death Eater grabbed me by my hair forcing me to witness the scene. The winning Death Eater let down his pants, thrusting immediately into Dorcas. Her screams were high and pitched, she tried to fight, but the Death Eaters that held her joints were far too strong for her. I couldn't make out the face of the man under his mask.
He was brutal, he bruised her breasts, biting into her neck again and again. The others laughed and cheered him on.
When he had finished, he got up and the next Death Eater opened his pants. Voldemort didn't care that they continued with their horrible occupation. Dorcas body was limp, she seemed to be unconscious.
But the Death Eater who was raping her now, pulled on her hair so hard, she screamed out loud in agony. He laughed rude. "You don't want to miss the best fuck you are ever going to get, whore, won't you?" I sobbed convulsive.
Voldemort- lost in thoughts- left the table and sat on a nearby chair.
"She is so saggy, maybe this will make her get going." He turned her and rammed into her. I threw up. I couldn't stand it anymore, but the Death Eater didn't allow me to turn away.
After the second Death Eater was done, he pushed Dorcas away roughly. I had no tears left. I would fall asleep now and then I would be dead. Everything would be peaceful and fine. My head was numb. I prayed that Dorcas felt the same way.
A third man came to Dorcas. I was only able to shake my head steadily. How could this be happening? How could wizards be so cruel?
After the Death Eater had his, Voldemort stepped towards Dorcas. His thinking seemed to be done. He used a charm to wake her up.
„Dorcas Meadows, I am going to ask you for the last time. Who is member of the Order of the Phoenix?"
„Me!"
„You? And?"
„Me! Dorcas!" Dorcas continued to scream her name, laughing crazy.
„My Lord, she seems to be out of her senses." A Death Eater with a soft voice said.
Voldemort bent over her.
"Well, worthless mudblood. I know you are in the Order, but you refuse to help me. I hope you enjoyed your last hour. Avada Kedavra."
Green light hit Dorcas and she wasn't anymore.
"No!" I screamed out loud.
"Miss Burke, you will be my guest until I have decided how you will die." He bowed and left the room.
My body was shaking. A lot of Death Eaters left the room now. My guard dragged me to my feet once more. My heart hammered in my chest, my mind started working again. I had to get out of here!
I saw the wand of my guard poking out of his trousers. Didn't he learn to never ever keep it there? Though my hands were still cuffed, I would be able to snitch it. Eight other Death Eaters were still in the room.
I remembered a sentence Steven Krum had said ages ago: If you have to fight against a superior number, always go for the strongest one first. It was a desperate plan, but I was in a desperate situation.
I quickly grabbed the wand, kicking my guard as hard in the womb as I could. He made a sound like a balloon loosing its air. I opened the cords tying me and swirled around. I had to get out of here. I made a shield charm around myself quickly, it was weak, but it had to last.
The Death Eaters had drawn their wands, approaching me. I fought like I had never done before. Desperation gave me additional power. I jumped, ducked, shot spell after spell in all directions, backtracking to the door, Voldemort did not disappear through. I had no idea where this door would lead me, but it was all I had.
I felt like back in school when I had to face Sash Zlanikov in a duel- lesson. He was taller, bigger and better, yet I miraculously managed to beat him. But I definitely didn't want to risk a trial of strength with Voldemort.
The door behind me flew open. Two Death Eaters ran towards me.
I levitated one of his fellows and send him flying into the two newcomers. All three smashed on the floor. I jumped behind them.
The door was no good. A window! Protego! I crashed through the window onto a lawn.
I heard them screaming and running. I tried to apparate, but it didn't work. No! I started running. I felt the first curses flashing around me. I couldn't win a fight against hundreds of them! An old trick dawned in my head. I slashed my wand in a whip-like move behind me, slashing their faces. I heard them screaming. Yes, this was a good one, but not effective enough. I reached the gate, but it didn't open. I had to get out of here. Nothing else mattered. The hedge was thick and high, but now it was escape or death. I jumped into the hedge, grabbing branches, squeezing me through them. I felt that the hedge started to tighten, it was going to strangle me. I ripped myself out it literally and fell onto the ground on the other side. I couldn't breathe at first, I had smashed on my back. Meanwhile, the Death Eaters came running towards me again, they had no problems with opening the gate. One of them was close to me. I apparated and yes! it worked.
I crashed onto a meadow near Edinburgh. I had loved playing here as a little girl. I felt something crashing next to me. Merlin, it was Death Eater! He must have grabbed my cloak. I jumped to my feed, he started to fight me, but he was feeble. Suddenly, I saw him touching a black mark on his left arm. It looked like a tattoo, a skull with a snake. He touched it and it glowed red. The swooshing sound in the air gave me an idea, what this mark was able to do. I disapparated. Now I stood in front of an old welsh castle I knew from a book. Nobody appeared this time.
I changed my place for a few times more, but I had no idea where to go. Godric's Hallow came to my mind. It was well protected and I hoped I would manage to get in there. I was afraid for the Lily and Harry, but there was no other place to go for me right now. I apparated into the wood near the Potter's mansion.
