Okay, I have to admit it. I've been waiting so, so anxiously to put this one up for you. This is probably one of my favorite oneshots I've ever written. I hope you enjoy it!

This takes place starting right at the end of Arc 3 and will lead us through time almost to the doorstep of Arc 4. We're almost there, everyone!

Warning – spoilers for the movie "Serenity." And a lot of Firefly references in general.

Enjoy!


-==OOO==-

The Chancery Bulletin Board

-==OOO==-

It was the very first thing they hung on the wall in the house, before even deciding where to put clocks and starting the Epic Argument About Posters In The Living Room (also known as the What Do You Mean You Don't Like Star Wars? incident).

They put it in the hall, right where it was clearly visible from the front door, the stairs, and most of the living room. It was a solid cork board where different things could be pinned or stapled, and beside it hung a nondescript whiteboard. Of course, within the first month Daryl made a sign for each. Over the cork board he put "Notices of Doom" and over the whiteboard went "Crazy Monetary Tracking of Doom." The cork board was an all-purpose free-for-all, but the whiteboard was the unique responsibility of Eric, who had been charged with keeping track of the house's bills and costs and keeping them divided fairly (which also eventually turned into a rough barter system in which others in the house bought him groceries so he'd keep track of the balances of debts for them).

The cork board acquired everything from emergency phone numbers, class schedules, and candid photos to an ongoing note-leaving community. Whenever Chris or Blair came by, they always laughed at what they called the evidence of a small tribal society made up of the Chancery's occupants and frequent visitors. Jim and Simon pretended to be immune, but they, too, were amused by the insight into the lives of the kids. Race and Benton, old hands at such a thing from years of messages at the Quest compound, just waited for the true silliness to emerge. Which it did its very first day; because the board was out in the open, they decided to utilize a euphemism when they needed to discuss Sentinels – in honor of Jim and Blair, they called it "going fishing."

Although after only a few weeks all eight of the inmates could tell handwriting apart, they usually signed their notes. It helped that between Jonny Quest, Hadji Singh (Quest), Jessie Bannon, Daryl Banks, Eric Faulk, Lai Gardner, Ngama Zimbati, and Kaimi Waihee, nobody had the same set of initials.

Over the years, the board acquired a series of memorable notes, often begun torn from a notebook and commentary added in the margins or additional sheets pinned nearby:

"Gone to Jamaica, back by spring. – JQ"
"WHAT? – DB"
"Jessie told me to leave a note when I left. – JQ"
"I wanted to know when you went to the library to see if I should join you. That is NOT a valid note, Jonny. – JB"
"It is if I can get dad to lend me the jet! – JQ"
"Take me with you! – EF"

-==OOO==-

"Missing: 1 red hat. Last seen in the kitchen. If found, reward of gratitude. – KW"
"Found: 1 red hat. It was in the dishwasher. No, I don't know why. – HS"
"I'm baking cookies sometime to surprise you but I'll wait until Jonny and Ngama are 'out fishing' so they don't find them all before you get some. – KW"
"Thanks for saying so. Now they'll never go and when will I get to swipe some cookies!? – DB"
"I'm a spy. Follow my lead. – LG"
"Though I will be grateful regardless, I feel the need to point out that it's not a very good surprise if you tell me what the reward is. – HS"
"Ignore him. BAKE COOKIES. – DB"

-==OOO==-

"Sunday dinner. You guys could use a study break. See you at the lodge. – Blair"
"I've got a paper on chaos theory due. I elect to remain here to work. I will also vacuum any room that is moderately tidy. – HS"
"Come to the lodge anyway. Then you can observe chaos theory in action. – Jim"
"No! Stay home! Study! And please vacuum! – KW"

-==OOO==-

"Daryl, I'm putting you on notice. You owe the house account $37 for groceries from last month. Pay up or I'll get Jonny to hack your funds from SELF and redirect them. – EF"
"What the hell do I owe $37 for? – DB"
"All the cooking supplies (flour, sugar, spices, etc) we bought for the house when we stocked up, divided by the 8 of us. – EF"
"Okay, that's not fair. First, I never cook anyway. Second, I've never even heard of some of the stuff in the cupboards and spice rack. You can't charge me for that. – DB"
"Oh yes I can. Roommate agreement contract, clause 4, bullet 3. – EF"
"Why'd we put him in charge of the finances again? – DB"
"Because he's good at it. – NZ"
"Speaking of cooking, how'd you weasel out of that on the chores rotation? I'm adding you back in. – LG"
"No! Don't! Seriously. We'll just end up eating pizza all the time. I swapped all his cooking shifts for my turns cleaning the bathrooms. Daryl, I really like you, but we both know I'm never eating your cooking again after that…thing. –JB"
"It was supposed to be lasagna!"
"That pan never recovered. – JQ"
"Thanks for reminding me. Add $15 for the pan you ruined. – EF"
" :-P "

-==OOO==-

"Why is there an OLD banana stapled to the board? STAPLED! – LG"
"You don't want to know. – HS"
"You're absolutely right. I don't. I retract the question. But if it starts to smell, no reason you can provide will save it. – LG"
"Fair enough. – HS"

-==OOO==-

"Heads up. We've got door-to-door religion people trying to convert us. – JQ"
"What religion? – NZ"
"Well, they opened with telling me we're all living in sin, so probably not one that's going to be okay with fishing. – JQ"
"The next time they come back, tell them we're too busy having orgies to be properly worshipful. – LG"
"…I'll be in my bunk. – EF"
"What? – NZ"
"HAVE YOU NEVER SEEN FIREFLY? MARATHON. THIS WEEKEND. MANDATORY. – JQ"
"Yes, sir, Captain Tight-Pants. – JB"

-==OOO==-

"Does anyone know who drank all the green tea? – KW"
"That was me. Sorry. I'll bring more next week. – Chris"
"No problem. Thanks! – KW"
"Invaders! Everybody look out! We've got infiltrators stealing our food! Somebody call out the guard! – DB"
"Late night, my friend? – HS"
"I hate exams. – DB"
"If we have a tea-stealer, maybe we should invest in a guard dog. – JB"
"I thought we had Jonny and Eric for that. – LG"
"Jonny, if you bite my boyfriend, I'm telling Race you've been looking flabby and he should make you run a couple of miles. – EF"
"My hero! – Chris"

-==OOO==-

"Ellison! My office! Now! – Simon"
"How does that even work? You're not in the house, you had no idea when I'd been here…why am I even leaving you a note? – Jim"
"I was just curious to see what you would do. – Race"
"Oh gods help us. The adults are trying to prank each other on our board. – LG"
"Get your own bulletin board! – DB"
"We have one. It's called Sandburg's desk. – Simon (for real)"
"Hey! If you're leaving notes on my desk, how come I never see any? – Blair"
"Seen your desk lately? – Jim"
"Never mind. If anybody needs me, I'll be at the station doing some cleaning. – Blair"

-==OOO==-

"Attention all Quests: Race's birthday is Tuesday. Standard plan? – JQ"
"Absolutely. – HS"
"Wouldn't miss it! – JQ"
"What is it? – NZ"
"You're better off not knowing. Plausible deniability. – JQ"
"I'll bring the buckets. – HS"

-==OOO==-

"Hey, Kaimi? Do you eat ketchup? – EF"
"Uh…sure? Why? – KW"
"Just figuring out if I'm dividing the bottle of ketchup by 7 people or 8 for the house budget. – EF"
"Man, you need a hobby! –JQ"
"I have already called Chris to assist. – HS"
"Ha ha. Very funny. Thanks, though. Kaimi – you owe me 85 cents on top of the invoice I already sent. – EF"
"He sends invoices? – Benton"
"Think we can get him to take over the financials up at the lodge? – Race"
"It depends. How's the pay scale for recent grads? – EF"
"Don't give in unless you get a bonus in unlimited ketchup supplies. – KW"
"Or at least unlimited whiteboard markers! Keeping track of the budget has gone through multiple packs in a matter of months! – JB"
"Both terms are negotiable. – Benton"

-==OOO==-

"Where did this picture come from? – JQ"
"I found it. – HS"
"Why did you put it up? – JQ"
"Because it made me laugh. – HS"
"It's adorable! – KW"
"If you failed to notice, that's my naked butt sticking up out of a pile of mud! – JQ"
"I know! – KW"
"Kaimi, clearly you need to get out more if you're so attached to Jonny's 4-year-old butt. – JB"
"And the award for the STRANGEST thing on the board to date goes to Jessie! – DB"
"You're welcome. – JB"
"Kaimi, I request the honor of your presence at dinner tonight. Without Jonny's butt. – NZ"

-==OOO==-

"Anybody want to take advanced quantum mechanics with me next term? – HS"
"Sure! – JB"
"I owe you one, Ace. Otherwise he'd guilt me into it. – JQ"
"Good. Pay up. You're taking Modern Feminism with me. – JB"
"Right on! – LG"
"Actually, I was already going to take it. – JQ"
"You're such a good boy. – KW"
"I'm taking it also. – NZ"
"Even better. – KW"
"Such enlightened men in this house. – Benton"
"So…nobody wants to take The Horror Genre 101: A Study of Forensics as Portrayed in Film with me? – DB"
"That's my whole life already, man. – Blair"
"I would if I could. I'll check my teaching schedule and see if I can squeeze it in! – Chris"
"Remember that folktale I told with the monster that turns its victims inside out? This is so much worse. – Blair"
"It's just jelly. And non-house-regulated ketchup. – DB"
"I do NOT regulate the ketchup in the house! – EF"
"Is anybody surprised that a discussion of quantum mechanics turned into a budget rant again? – LG"
"THIS IS NOT A RANT! – EF"

-==OOO==-

"Wanted. One pair of snow pants and somebody to teach me to go sledding. – KW"
"What are you going to sled in, the slush? – DB"
"If I have to! – KW"
"Fine. You can use mine. Meet you at 6 behind the stadium. – DB"

-==OOO==-

"There's a hole in my bucket, dear Jessie, dear Jessie. – KW"
"I'm missing a reference here. – NZ"
"It's a rhyme. I don't know what she wants, though. Kaimi? Clarify? – JB"
"Okay. For the literal-minded: There's a hole in my backpack, dear Jessie, dear Jessie. – KW"
"Then fix it, dear Kaimi, dear Kaimi. Fix it. – JB"
"With what shall I fix it, dear Jessie, dear Jessie? – KW"
"With some duct tape, dear Kaimi, dear Kaimi. Duct tape! (Duct tape fixes everything!) Or, alternatively: With a new one, dear Kaimi, dear Kaimi. – JB"
"Somebody stop them! – LG"
"How? We're not prying down the board, and I think that's the only way. We didn't take it down when Jonny's butt was on it for a full semester. – DB"
"Oh, I meant to put that picture back up. Thanks for reminding me. – HS"
"THANKS A LOT. – JQ"
"So, what was all that duct tape backpack business, anyway? – EF"
"That was a long and earworm-y way of Kaimi telling Jessie she needs a new backpack and asking if she wanted to go shopping. – LG"
"How do you know these things? – NZ"
"I live in the same room with them. Some things are contagious. – LG"
"Including, apparently, butt pictures! Hadji, is that you? – KW"
"Evidently my brother has decided on petty revenge. – HS"
"You call it petty. I call it karma. – JQ"
"Well, if anybody else wants a ride in the karma to the store, be here Friday after lunch. – JB"

-==OOO==-

"Some friends are playing their first gig at Coffee-2-Go this weekend. Anybody wanna come? – LG"
"Do you mean Ryan? – KW"
"Yeah, why? – LG"
"I've heard them. More like 'Eardrums-2-Go.' Fishermen, stay home! – KW"

-==OOO==-

"I'm posting my finals schedule here so you can all see it. Might make it easier to coordinate stuff for the next few weeks. – JB"
"Jessie, let me ask. Were you intending to sleep at all? – HS"
"Very funny. Says the guy taking half again as many credits in two majors! – JB"
"He's got a point, Jess. You're going to be awfully busy. And next Thursday is kind of a big deal. – DB"
"It is? How so? – JB"
"It's been a year since I first asked you out on a date. – DB"
"It's been a YEAR? How did I miss that? I'm so sorry! I totally forgot! – JB"
"Time flies when you're having FUN. – JQ"
"Don't you start, Jonny, or I'll sic Hadji on you. Daryl, what's your schedule for finals? We'll find a time! – JB"
"I pinned it up next to yours. It's looking pretty hopeless unless we have a 5am breakfast. – DB"
"I'm all for celebrating our anniversary, but not THEN. – JB"
"I believe you have overlooked the obvious. Please note where I have marked both your schedules. – NZ"
"Yeah, but we're supposed to be running an introduction to the Quest computers for some of the newbies up at the lodge at that time. Thanks for the effort. – DB"
"Clearly you have missed the point. Ngama and I shall handle it for you. – HS"
"You are the BEST! I could kiss the both of you! Thanks so much! – JB"
"You can if you want to. I mean, I'm not bothered and I'm not jealous and we've all lived together for a year and it's all fine, but I'd still kind of rather you don't, please. – DB"
"No worries, Daryl. She gave us hugs instead. And all her notes. Much more helpful. – NZ"
"If you're still feeling bereft, Ngama, let me know... – KW"
"Ooh, looks like we need a Board of Doom: After Dark edition. – EF"
"With Jim around, plus our dads? No way. – JB"
"Write it in invisible ink! – KW"
"OH MY GOD THAT ACTUALLY WORKS! – KW"
"I'll be setting up testing of invisible ink for you fishermen next week. Thanks for the idea! – Blair"
"You gave him IDEAS. Thanks a lot, guys. – Jim"
"The things we do to try to date around here. – DB"
"Yeah, but it's worth it. – JB"
"Yes, it definitely is. – DB"

-==OOO==-

"IMPORTANT. Our lease is up at the end of the month. Anybody want out of this madhouse? Leave me a note below if you don't want me to just automatically renew for all of us for next year."

-==OOO==-

"I've updated the chores roster and posted it here. After a year of living together, I think I know better who can be relied upon to do what and who will just trade and swap until they get stuff they want. – LG"
"Wait, why do Ngama and I have all the bathroom cleaning? – JQ"
"Because we just spent a year listening to you complain about the slime everywhere! – JB"
"Because there was, in fact, slime everywhere. – NZ"
"And you and Jonny can actually tell the difference. So you clean. – KW"
"Game, set, and match, my friend. – HS"

-==OOO==-

"Follow-up to IMPORTANT: The lease is all taken care of. Though there's one more line in the agreement this time. 'Renters will repair the damage caused in the backyard to the grass and establish a nice garden.' I'm thinking either Japanese rock garden or else a bed of poisonous and carnivorous plants. Any other suggestions?"
"You can't just plant a few flowers and be done with it? – Jim"
"Where's the fun in that? – JQ"
"I vote a kindergarten of increasingly ugly lawn gnomes. – EF"
"Can't we do both? – JQ"
"I like the way you think, sir. – EF"

-==OOO==-

"General note. If anybody catches Hadji up all night watching competitive poker, please force him to go to bed by any means necessary. – JQ"
"I merely needed something in the background to keep me awake while finishing my reading for my thesis. – HS"
"But I was gonna take him around the clubs this weekend! Hadji'd be the best card shark ever! – EF"
"Get your own card-counting master of probability. – JQ"
"Hey Lai? You doing anything this weekend? – EF"

-==OOO==-

"In case it needs saying: I HATE WINTER! – KW"
"Then why do you live in Cascade? – NZ"
"Uh, Ngama? Think before you ask stupid questions of which you are the beneficiary. – DB"
"On the plus side, there's lots of hot chocolate in the kitchen and Doctor Quest just sent over a huge pile of fleece blankets. Weekend of couch cuddling anybody? – JB"
"I take it back. I like winter! – KW"
"As do I. – NZ"

-==OOO==-

"Anybody want to go out on the town this Friday night? – DB"
"And do what, exactly? – LG"
"I don't know! Whatever normal non-caught-up-in-fishing-stuff young people do! – DB"
"So, drink to excess, experiment with recreational drugs which may result in long-term damage or addiction depending upon the quantities, make poor sexual choices, and proceed to spend the following morning curled around a toilet bemoaning one's folly? – NZ"
"Well, when you put it like that, who's up for a trip to the lodge? – DB"
"You guys must REALLY like fishing. – Chris"
"Some more than others. – HS"
"That is…I don't even know how to interpret… – EF"
"Then do not attempt it. Or go imbibe to excess to clear your mind. – HS"
"It serves you right. You're not the only one who can leave suggestive commentary on the board. – NZ"
"Yeah, but I'm better at it than you. I am very skilled in a variety of... – EF"
"Yeah, quit while you're ahead, buddy. – DB"

-==OOO==-

Follow-up to Follow up of IMPORTANT: Notice to all residents and guests. Do not walk through the backyard. Any rashes, blisters, or ailments you may acquire from exposure to our garden is your own fault. Thanks. The Management."
"Note – time to invest in a better first aid kit. – JB"

-==OOO==-

"What's this doing here? – JB"
"Somebody threw out a perfectly good Stop sign. I rescued it. – EF"
"Why? – JB"
"Uh…it's a conversation piece? – EF"
"I should say the opposite. Everyone who has seen it thus far has obeyed its command and stopped to stare at it awkwardly. – HS"
"Maybe we should put it over Blair's desk at the SELF house. – JB"
"WHO PUT THE STOP SIGN OVER MY DESK? – Blair"
"The Chancery pleads the fifth."

-==OOO==-

"Anybody want to have a Mario Kart tournament of champions? – DB"
"Yeah! Set it up and we'll do it on Sunday! – KW"
"Don't invite Jim. – Simon"
"Why? – EF"
"Because the department will dock his pay if he crashes any more cars, even virtual ones! – Blair"
"Sandburg, I know where you live. – Jim"
"Good thing Simon's giving me a ride home, then! – Blair"

-==OOO==-

"Jessie, what is that? – LG"
"It's the tally-board for Jonny and I and the bets we make. –JB"
"YOU'VE BEEN KEEPING SCORE? – JQ"
"Apparently for the last six years. – HS"
"Aw, don't feel too bad, Jonny. Maybe in another six years you can close the gap. And who knows? Six years after that you might catch up. – JB"
"Only if you are employing an assumption that you will win at a far lesser rate than you have to date, Jessie. In 12 years at the current rate, Jonny will be behind your score by … – HS"
"Who's side are you on, anyway, Hadj?! – JQ"
"Just 'cause he's right is no reason to scratch out his message, Jonny! – JB"
"Hey, when you're so far behind, you gotta do whatever it takes to catch up! I bet you that in 10 years I'll be ahead! – JQ"
"We'll see about that. I WILL be keeping track. – JB"
"See you at the finish line, Ace. – JQ"

-==OOO==-

"WHY ARE ALL THE LAWN GNOMES SET UP IN THE LIVING ROOM? – Race"
"Maybe they don't like the rain. – Blair"
"This is your fault somehow, I know it, Sandburg. – Jim"
"I didn't do it! – Blair"
"Go argue on your own board! – JQ"
"In time this board will be OURS and we will reign supreme!"
"Who said that? – Jim"
"Maybe it was the gnomes."

-==OOO==-

"Anybody want to hit the Jags game next weekend? – Jim"
"Count us in – JQ & HS"
"Us too! – DB & JB"
"No thank you. – KW & NZ"
"It's finally happened. They're pairing off. Quick, let's go on a date, Eric! – LG"
"That man is MINE. Go find your own guy. Or girl. Whatever. – Chris"
"I'm sure Marc would be happy to date you, Lai. – DB"
"Ooh, low blow, Banks. – EF"
"I said guy. Or girl. Psychotic lowlifes do not count. – Chris"
"And I think calling him that is an insult to the psychotic lowlife community. – DB"
"Isn't that a bit harsh? – NZ"
"OMG DIDN'T YOU EVEN WATCH FIREFLY? – EF"
"I may have nodded off at some point… – NZ"
"Time to make it an annual Firefly marathon! Kaimi, you're on Ngama Sleep Duty! – JQ"
"Yes sir, Captain! – KW"
"If Jonny's the captain, clearly Kaimi is Kaylee. I'm Zoe, which makes Daryl Wash. – JB"
"So…Ngama as Simon? Hadji's definitely Book. Lai and Eric – votes? – JQ"
"I'd like to think I'm smarter and more loyal than Jayne. Can I be River? Then I can kick ass and kill you all with my brain. – EF"
"Fine with me. I guess that makes me Inara. Is that weird? – LG"
"Very, but also weirdly accurate. – KW"
"I'm good with being Wash. – DB"
"By chance, have you seen the movie yet? – HS"
"No. Why? – DB"
" :-( "

-==OOO==-

"If anybody sees a towel with a giant red flower on it, it's mine. Can you give it back? – LG"
"Um…I used it. – EF"
"For what? – LG"
"I'll just buy you a new one. – EF"
"Oh gods I don't want to know. – LG"

-==OOO==-

"Hereby let it be known that the Alliance of Garden Gnomes have submitted the following list of demands to their keepers: unlimited ketchup and white-board markers, unfettered access to Daryl's cooking, a giraffe, a sample of Blair Sandburg's luxurious hair, a turban woven of Hadji's quotes, a three-day week, and a picture of the bathtub in the girls' room."
"WHO IS LEAVING GNOME NOTES? – EF"
"I'm on the case. – JQ"
"Me too. – HS"
"Got any suspects yet? – KW"
"Yes. Vengeance will be ours soon. Fear not, denizens of Chancery! We've got you covered! – JQ"
"That was NOT funny, Quest."
"That'll teach you to mess with our board, Henri! – JQ"
"Henri, you owe me $50 for the dry-cleaning. – Brian"

-==OOO==-

"Is it me, or has there been a strong increase in the number of plastic dinosaurs popping up around the house? – NZ"
"It's for Daryl. He's not over the movie yet. – JB"
"Curse your sudden but inevitable betrayal! – JQ"
"I finally got that one. – NZ"
"I'll be in my bunk…weeping. – DB"
"I want to be someone! – Chris"
"This is not the time for existential crises. – HS"
"I mean in Firefly! – Chris"
"Well, you can be Jayne. – KW"
"Pass. – Chris"
"Or you can be some one-episode character who gets killed or turns out to be evil. – EF"
"I guess I'll be The Man They Call Me! – Chris"
"Wanna hang out in my bunk? – EF"
"Your roommate is weeping all over it. – JQ"
"Damn. Captain, can I have a shuttle? – EF"
"Dude. Your boyfriend has his own room. Go on a spacewalk. – JQ"
"Well, my days of not taking you seriously are certainly coming to a middle. – Jim"

-==OOO==-

"Hey everybody. I've dropped off a box of finals essentials. Coffee, cookies, energy drinks, tea for those of you with healthier sensibilities, a fresh supply of printer paper and ink, and a few motivational items. Good luck! – Blair"
"Sandburg, why the hell was there a slinky in that box? – Jim"
"It's motivation! I always liked the noise it makes. – Blair!"
"If we needed further proof that you are not a fisherman, there it is. – NZ"
"You're just doing it to torture us, aren't you? – JQ"
"Hey, the sooner you finish, the sooner you guys can come up to the lodge for a while! We just put in a full paint-ball course and some of the new arrivals want to plan a movie marathon. – Blair"
"Everybody. STUDY FASTER. I'll see you on the paintball court, Quest. – EF"
"You and what army? – JQ"
"How about Jim and I? – Race"
"IT'S SO ON! – JQ"