Authors note - Hey guys, sorry this is late, I've really been struggling with this. I know exactly where I want to take the story now, just trying to find a way of getting there! Will try and get into it again properly tomorrow! I can't take full credit for this chapter, and would like to thank love-like-fools for her input! Hope you enjoy guys :) Ruben x

Both women stood, frozen in time. Tilly's tears momentarily stopping as she tried to comprehend the situation she was in. She wasn't entirely sure that her heart had started beating again. She couldn't move. Just stood and stared, at the woman before her. Jen looked beautiful. Absolutely fucking beautiful. Her royal blue dress setting off her dark hair and clear complexion, her Parka jacket hanging from her broad shoulders. She was looking straight into Tillys eyes, her own instantly filling with tears at the sight of Tillys fragile state. She instinctively reached out to her, her hand stopping short just centimetres from Tillys. But Tilly couldn't move. Didn't even flinch as Jens hand had moved towards hers. She wasn't sure she'd ever be able to describe how she felt. Numb didn't feel like the right word. It was more like there was so many emotions tearing through her heart, it was stopping her from being able to think, or feel anything.

"Tilly... What's wrong?" As soon as she'd said it, Jen pulled her hand back and looked away. It was so feeble, so weak.

Hearing Jens voice, Tillys stomach turned cold. She couldn't believe how amazing it was to hear the tenderness, resonating through her head. Just as a huge sob escaped from her stomach, a painful sensation shot through her legs and they crumpled beneath her. OVERWHELMED. That was the word. Yes, definitely overwhelmed. She was vaguely aware that she was on the ground, fumbling her way to a sitting position. She could smell the sweet perfection of Jens perfume, and realised she was knelt infront of her. She could feel Jens hands touch her cheeks, pulling Tillys head up to meet her eyes, and stared deeply into them.

"I'm sorry, Tilly. I'm so sorry." It came out in little more than a whisper, her own emotions hitting her full force. She kept her hands firmly where they were, stroking away every tear that dripped from Tillys eyes. She was talking again, Tilly knew that. Could see Jens mouth moving, focusing on a tiny dot of red lipstick that had smudge on her bottom lip. But she couldn't hear what she was saying. All she could hear was The Lumineers, as clearly as if she still had her earphones in.

She'll lie and steal and cheat, and beg you from her knees,
Make you think she means it this time...

Jen was still speaking.

"If I could change it Tilly, I would. You know that, don't you?" Jen was looking desperately at Tilly. Her face was so close, Tilly could see the flecks of amber in her eyes. She could see the small beauty spot just above her cheek bone. Why did she always cover it with foundation? Why did she try and mask her beauty from the world? Tilly studied her forehead. Could see the faint lines of worry and stress, etched into her skin like a poem. A poem of forbidden love. How long had those lines been there? She didn't see this part of Jens face often, her thick silky fringe usually fell right to her eyebrows. Tilly preffered it that way.

"Why do you keep pinning your fringe back? It looks better down." Tilly heard the words escape her mouth, but she wasn't sure that she'd said them. It didn't even sound like her.

Jen just stared at her, worry flashing through her eyes. Tilly looked down, suddenly feeling tired. She just wanted to curl up, right here on the ground, and sleep. But Jens hands were holding on tight to her face, and she needed the touch too much to pull away. Somewhere inside herself, she knew it was dangerous. Knew that once she'd fought herself out of the bubble she was stuck in, she'd want to be as far away from Jen as possible. But right now, she didn't have the strength to fight.

"Tilly, look at me. Please." She pulled her eyes up, and melted into Jens eyes. She was moving before her brain had a chance to catch up, reaching her hands inside Jens coat to find her body. But as soon as she touched Jen, the spell was broken. Reality crashed into her as she pulled away and grabbed at Jens hands, pulling them from her face with a strength she didn't know she had. Jen let out a shout, shocked. Tilly stood up, her whole body shaking with the effort. Jen moved quickly, trying to pull Tilly to her. But Tilly was strong with emotion, knocking Jen backwards. Fire was rushing through her body, and as she looked into Jens eyes, she felt it surge right up her body and into her throat.

"Stop! Whatever it is you're trying to do, stop! God, how I hate what you've done! What WEVE done. But I can't hate you. No matter how hard I've tried, I can't. I don't want to forgive you. I don't ever want to forgive what you've put me through. So don't do this. Don't try and fix me. Because I'll give in, and that's not fair!"

She turned then, and began to run. Run faster than she'd ever run in her life. She ran all the way home, up the drive and into the house, the door slamming behind her. She couldn't believe the force of her emotions. Couldn't believe it was possible to feel so fired up with love, and resentment. She fell onto the sofa as a thought crept into her mind.

Even if they let me back into 6th form, how am I going to be able to walk in there everyday? Knowing she's near. Knowing I could bump into her everytime I'm walking down the corridor, everytime I round a corner. And everytime I see her, it will chip away at me a bit more. And it will keep chipping until I won't be able to remember this. Won't remember the force of the pain that she's caused. All I will know is that I still love her.