Chapter 12

They had met quite by chance earlier that morning; both Katie and Hannah had wanted to take swimming classes at the leisure centre and unbeknownst to Michaela and Sully, they had both been allocated to the same session. The leisure centre being a fair enough distance from her flat to prevent her returning home after dropping Katie off, and the session being at midday, Michaela had tried to change Katie's session to earlier in the day in an attempt to save time. To her disappointment, all the spaces had been taken and she had finally resigned herself to the fact that she would be spending an hour and a half sitting alone in her car. Thus she was pleasantly surprised when the white van pulled up next to her and the familiar figure stepped out.

The centre being closer to his flat, Sully had insisted that Michaela accompany him back for lunch, maintaining that they could come back for the girls together. When she had begun to protest, embarrassed at his continuous gestures of hospitality, Sully had teasingly suggested that she could cook and he'd supervise. Unable to formulate a witty response through sheer mortification, she had assented; hence she now stood by the window, having been forcibly dismissed from the kitchen whilst Sully cleared up the dirty dishes. Glancing over at the pages that habitually scattered the desk, she smiled slightly, the memory of the enthralled children huddling closer to him rising before her, the broad grin on his face illuminating his previously tortured features with a sincere delight. Tracing the scribbled texts with her hand, a sudden thought flittered through her mind and biting back a grin, she made to gather the sheets together. A flash of gold caught her eye and with a slight frown, she pulled the headed paper from the stack. Instantly recognizing the emblem, she scanned the contents of the short letter, her heart seemingly checking its beats within her chest as she sought to absorb the fragmented sentences that blurred before her eyes.

"What ya got there?"

Though startled, Michaela barely reacted; turning towards Sully, she held out the letter and asked quietly, "Why is the Oncology department writing to you?"

Sully's expression darkened, assuming an uncharacteristic closed, almost haunted appearance.

"Where d'ya get that?" he demanded in a voice of forced calm.

"It was with your papers," explained Michaela, perturbed by the steely glint in his eyes, "I was just trying to…."

"You weren't trying to do nothin', you were pryin'" exclaimed Sully furiously, snatching the letter away from her.

"Sully," replied Michaela, "I'm sorry…"

"You had no right!" he rejoined, slamming his fist down on the desk and blindly ignoring her increasingly emotional state.

Distressed and somewhat frightened by his sudden outburst, Michaela turned and grabbing her bag off the couch, hurried out of the door before the tears began to cascade down her cheeks. So engulfed was he by his fit of ire, that Sully scarcely registered her exit; only when the sound of the front door slamming behind her reverberated through the hall, did he look up. Anger began to dissipate, shame rising swift in its wake as the consequences of what he had done, crashed with full force against him. Cursing under his breath, he collapsed into a chair, the letter still clutched tight in his hand. Casting a malignant glance at the opening lines, the frustration began to swell within him anew. Balling up the thin sheet that had splintered his relationship, he flung it violently against the wall; it bounced wearily off, rolling slowly until it came to rest at his feet once again.


Padding curiously over to the front door, she opened it a fraction and peered out into the darkness. The surprise that flickered momentarily in her eyes as the porch light threw the features into sharp relief was hastily replaced by a cold indifference and at his low greeting she merely opened the door a little further and leaned heavily against the frame. Sensing her withdrawal, he stepped closer and murmured softly, "Can I come in?"

Shifting slightly and avidly avoiding his gaze, she responded quietly, "I don't think so, it's really late…"

Reaching out to touch her gently on the arm, Sully brought her gaze back up to meet his own. "Michaela," he pleaded, heart contracting painfully as she instantly pulled her arm away, breaking the contact between them, "please, I need to explain…"

"Where's Hannah?" she interrupted briskly, her voice wholly devoid of the emotion that was filling his own.

"I left her with a neighbour," replied Sully quickly, "I know it's late, but I had to see you."

"Why Sully?" retorted Michaela, fixing him with a sardonic stare, "you made it perfectly clear earlier what you think of me and of our friendship. I really don't think there's anything left to explain."

"I'm sorry for what I said," said Sully, "I was angry and I know it was wrong of me…but if you'll just hear me out…please."

The sincerity in his tone touched her heart and though still resolved to maintain her position of detachment, she finally stepped aside. Not waiting for him, she walked over to the kitchen table and sat down, hands curling tightly over the now cold mug of coffee more for want of something to still the slight tremble. Sully followed less certainly in her wake, pausing by the chair opposite hers; yet when she showed no inclination of inviting him to sit, he sighed softly and shrugging off his jacket, sat down. Her attention was directed on the cup clenched between her fingers, the whitened knuckles betraying the strain that she would not permit to show on her face. Steeling himself for what he was about to do, Sully knotted his own hands on the table and taking a deep breath began.

"Michaela, for what I said before, how I acted, I'm sorry. I didn't mean the things I said. It's just…"

Pausing as he sought the words to explain the fury that had overcome him that afternoon, he glanced up; her head was still bent down and whether she was listening or not was debatable. Yet at his protracted silence, she lifted her eyes, their expression unfathomable.

"It's just what…?" she repeated.

"It's complicated," completed Sully enigmatically. The response was far from acceptable to Michaela and she leant back in her chair, arms crossing across her chest.

"So explain it to me," she said neutrally.

Rising from his chair, Sully walked to the kitchen counter and for a moment remained with his back turned to her. Thus as he began to speak, Michaela had to lean forward across the table, straining to catch the words that were muffled, whether simply by distance or broken emotion, it would be impossible to tell.

"I had a brother…. he was four years older than me, lived up in New York. When we were kids, we'd do the craziest things together, always ridin' around on his bike. We'd drag it all the way up to this huge hill in the park and then both jump on just as it started to go down. My mom always said one or other of us would get killed in the process but we just used to laugh it off. Never thought that day would ever come."

He paused for breath yet even the moment's silence was oppressive to Michaela; a window was opening and she leant forward further, eager to feel its draught.

"Last year, I got a call from his wife. Apparently he hadn't been feelin' too good and she'd taken him to the hospital. They ran some tests and…."

Turning back towards Michaela, Sully pressed his back against the counter as the words fell from his lips, "he had cancer…. leukaemia…they…tried everythin' but it was too late…in two months he was gone."

"Sully," breathed Michaela, rising from her seat to stand before him, the compassion rising in her eyes, "I'm so sorry."

"When I got the letter from the hospital I just panicked," continued Sully, swiping at the moisture that had started running down his cheeks, "I kept thinkin', what if I've got it too, what's goin' to happen to Hannah…. I don't know what I'd do…. I'm scared Michaela."

Desperation had darkened the blue pools and as they met the warm tints of amber and green they implored for her understanding which instantly resurfaced, accompanied by forgiveness.

"I know Sully," murmured Michaela, reaching up and brushing away his tears, "I know. But you don't have to worry, I'm right here with you. We'll do this together."

"No," interjected Sully suddenly, clasping her wrists, "I don't want you to have to go through this cos of me…you got your own life. …your work…Katie…you should just walk away…"

"I'm not going anywhere Sully," replied Michaela firmly, "I'm staying with you."

Lifting herself up on her toes, she wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered softly against his ear, "I love you, too."


"Mommy… Mommy…"

Michaela woke at the soft but insistent whisper near her ear. Drowsily turning to lie on her back and wearily opening her eyes, she found Katie's face hovering a few inches above hers. Closing them immediately again, she let out a soft moan, "Katie…"

Happy that she was finally awake, the little girl gave her mother a quick peck on the cheek and whilst sliding down from the bed she informed her, "The sun's shining, Mommy!"

"Oh…" Remembering that she had promised to take her daughter and, if her father agreed, Hannah to a park or out of town on the next sunny Saturday so they could fly the kites they had made at the kindergarten, Michaela knew that her night was over.

After a quick breakfast, the two Quinn women were on their way to the Sully's and Michaela had barely pulled the car into the parking space when Katie opened her door and jumped onto the ground. During their ride Michaela had grown insecure, not about spending time with Sully and his daughter but about the early hour. Yet seeing Katie so eager she knew there wasn't any chance of holding her back any longer. And obviously her friend shared her enthusiasm; looking up at the house in front of her, she spotted Hannah behind the window, waving excitedly. Evidently she had been waiting for them and Michaela wondered whether Sully had been too. Hannah threw the door open the moment they approached it and after a quick, "Good morning, Dr. Mike," the girls disappeared into Hannah's room, chattering cheerily together.

For a moment, Michaela felt lost in the narrow corridor but before she could start feeling uncomfortable, the door to Sully's bedroom opened and he stepped out. Still not fully awake, he first rubbed his eyes with his palms and then run his hands through his hair asking, "Hannah, what's all the commo…"

Pausing suddenly as he noticed his unexpected guest and trying to comprehend the situation, he wondered aloud in pure bewilderment, "Michaela? What…"

She interrupted him, her words muddling in her haste to explain herself:

"The sun is shining and the girls have these kites… I mean I promised Katie to go with her and she wanted Hannah to come, too… And I thought, I mean you know all the places round here so…"

Sully chuckled and whilst he, still drowsily, covered one side of his chest with his right hand, he softly touched her upper arm with the other one trying to calm her down, "Hey, slow down… it's just me."

Wondering why the color in her cheeks rose furiously and she avoided looking at him, he suddenly became aware that he stood there the way he had crawled out of his bed; barefoot and wearing nothing than some blue boxer shorts. He always had thought that blushing was a phenomenon he would never encounter but feeling his face suddenly growing hot he was sure that it carried a pink that could rival the bright hue colouring Michaela's. Clearing his throat he suggested, trying to suppress his embarrassment, "Uhm, why don't ya wait in the kitchen… I'll be there in a minute."

During breakfast, Sully considered where to go. There were some great parks in town. They could go to Hannah's favorite, the Bear Creek Park, but thinking a little longer, Sully decided to take them somewhere different. The weather forecast had predicted a full day of sunshine which meant they could even go out of town. He felt that finally it might be the right time to visit the special place he had neglected for so long.

"Can I get up, Daddy?" His daughter's voice startled him out of his thoughts.

"Sure, sweet girl. You take your kite and go to the car with Katie and Dr. Mike. I'm coming too…"

Yet Hannah was already out of the room calling for her friend who waited with her mommy in the living room, "Katie, come on, we're going!"

Hearing the excited patter of the little feet from the corridor, Sully couldn't help but chuckle. He was still smiling as Michaela poked her head in, informing him, "We'll wait by the car."

Nodding, Sully hastily swallowed his last bit; there was something he still needed to say. "Michaela…"

She had almost closed the door already but opened it a bit again in order to hear what he wanted to tell her.

"Sorry 'bout earlier…"

Blushing again at the memory of his half-naked body still warm from sleep right in front of her she assured him, "Nothing to be sorry about, Sully…" And, in a sudden impulse of boldness, she added cheekily, "Although… I missed the Snoopy shorts."

Before he could react she pulled the door closed and was out of the flat.


"Mommy, can Hannah and me sit in one car, please?"

Bending down to stroke her daughter's hair, Michaela automatically amended, "May Hannah and I, Sweetheart…" and contemplated their options. Concluding that there was only one reasonable solution, she straightened again waiting for Sully who approached her carrying a large bag. As soon as he was close enough to participate in their talk she suggested, "We could take the BMW, there's enough room for all of us…. It would be a waste of fuel taking two cars, what do you think?"

A fleeting smile crossed his face; he was glad that she had given him a good enough reason to agree because he of course was thrilled at the prospect of driving her car again. "I think that's a good idea." Confirming his words with a nod, he held his hand out to take the keys from her and raising his eyebrows he dashed her protest before she was even able to voice it, "I know the way."

Mimicking his expression she softly retorted, "You could give me directions…"

Considering her for a moment, a little smirk at last lightened the blue of his eyes. "Okay, let's go then."

They hadn't even reached the main street yet when he started advising her.

"Okay, we've gotta go west in the direction of Manitou. I think it'd be best to take Palmer Park Boulevard and then Uinta Street… Although, Charlie told me that they are repairing the road there… we could take Platte Avenue and depending on the traffic we could still turn into Galley Road."

Hearing her moan softly, he gave his voice an innocent tone continuing, "Well I guess it's best if I just say "next left" or "right", then I can change my mind depending on the situation…"

"Alright, alright, you win."

Rolling her eyes, Michaela drove up to the sidewalk and applied the brakes. "Men," she muttered under her breath, not wholly able to suppress a smile as she loosened her seatbelt whilst Sully, trying not to openly display his joy, was already out of his door and rounding the car, eager to take the driver's seat.


Initially both Sully and Hannah pointed out some of the buildings and places as they passed but soon the girls were engrossed in their own world and Sully grew quieter the closer they came to the outskirts of town. Glancing at his face from time to time, Michaela wondered what was wrong but she knew better than to ask, especially with the children in the backseat. So she just leaned back and enjoyed the landscape outside even as Sully became increasingly nervous with every passing minute. Not that he doubted his decision; he simply wasn't sure what seeing this place would do to him after such a long time. In fact he was glad that he wasn't alone and as he left the asphalt road to take a sideway he announced, "Only five more minutes."

They needed ten, but no one complained. The surrounding was breathtaking and Michaela couldn't believe that they were not even an hour away from their homes. After Sully had parked the car under a huge oak, the children immediately went to the trunk demanding their kites, only interested in finally having fun flying them. However, Michaela was in awe. Before them lay a meadow that ascended the graceful curves of a hill. Several old trees were scattered over the area and a tree line surrounded the place and made it look like a large clearing. "Sully, it's beautiful," she breathed and as she turned to look at him for confirmation, she was startled by his painful expression.

With his voice cracking he replied, "It is," yet unable to say anymore, he turned away and joined the children in order to help them with their kites.

Puzzled, Michaela again let her gaze wander over the landscape with its lush vegetation, having no idea what it could be that made Sully feel so uncomfortable. However, it was obvious that her help was required; although, all she knew about flying kites was that two people were needed to get it into the air. As she approached the others, her daughter excitedly informed her, "Mr. Sully promised to help us, Mommy."

Any sign of his earlier discomfort had been erased from his face as he chuckled, "I'm sure your mom will manage, Kates," and turning to Michaela he added, "Just watch me and do the same; it's really easy."

Daring to give him a smile in response she nodded and positioned herself a few meters away watching his every move whilst the girls waited some yards away for them to finally start.

And then the fun began. Sully held Hannah's self-made kite chest-high and shouted, "Run, sweet girl and no matter what, don't stop!"

The little girl started running and as she was fast enough for her father's liking, he released the kite and the bright colored toy began soaring. Katie jumped excitedly, "Come on, Mommy, now us!"

Somewhat insecure but not showing it, Michaela repeated Sully's actions and a few moments later two kites were sailing across the cloudless sky. The wind was perfect and Sully knew that he and Michaela would be able to have a little time to themselves. He went to the car to get the blanket from his bag. Picking out a spot where the grass wasn't as high and they could easily watch the girls, he spread it out and gestured for Michaela to sit down with him.

His outburst when he had thought she was prying fresh in her mind, she waited for him to reveal the secret of this place. The only thing she was certain about was that he had been here before.

After the initial shock of being back had worn off, Sully realized that he had grown increasingly comfortable. The occasional laughter of the children and Michaela's presence made him relax further and enough to finally confess, "I always wanted to build a house here, I just never had the money."

He paused to gauge her reaction and seeing that she took this merely as a dream one might have gazing at such a majestic landscape, he clarified, "This land here is mine."

Watching her expression change as the realization hit her he added, "I bought the land to build a house for my family here."