CH.12: Finding purpose

Kanan was led to a small room with just one table and two chairs on opposite sides. His wrists were cuffed, precautions of course, and his weapon was taken from him…they went to great lengths to keep him from his weapon…big warning sign there this was not his typical interrogation. Left alone in the room with the red haired leader he paced about the room growing familiar with how many steps there were from one side of the room to the other. "I take it my being here has raised a lot of red flags huh?"

"I have heard of you Kanan…and while normally I would welcome another Jedi into our folds you are unpredictable at best. Since the resurgence of the Sith and Vader hunting down the remaining Jedi you have made yourself scarce, as have Obi-Wan and Yoda, yet you have hardly accomplished what they have…in fact your contributions are quite small. Ahsoka left the Jedi Order for good reason and she has since then been helping our cause-."

"I'm sorry…did you say helping? No offense but when was the last time she saw any real action…I'll tell you…the Clone Wars. Ahsoka keeps to the shadows…she figures if she shows her face she will be on Vader's list. True I haven't joined your small cause Rebellion but I have been out there doing good…even if it involves fooling around or getting paid that blue blade of mine has not flickered or subsided into my weapon."

Kanan shot her a look daring her to tell him otherwise. The Rebellion could use the Jedi…as it was once a beacon of hope and empowerment among the old organization…and yet since the rise of Vader any such hope had been diminished to camp fire tales. This Mon Mothma as she called herself, he had heard the guards talking and all…seemed a spearhead figure for the Rebellion but when was the last time she made her voice heard?

Mon Mothma moves to the vacant chair and takes a seat studying him. He has to admit she is rather beautiful with her short auburn hair and piercing blue eyes. The robe was quite snug on her…without it he imagined she rocked the whole goddess vibe. "You are a loose canon Kanan…you only look out for yourself, you have made that clear…so…while holding you for several outstanding warrants on your head…one person speaks highly of you and told me you were instrumental in recovering a Rebel Agent of ours."

Kanan raised a brow but as she motioned to the glass it lit up and he stood back seeing Lando standing there. "Hey there Kanan…thanks for rescuing Zeb. He would thank you as well but first thing he wanted a shower, could not blame him. I will be joining him shortly…but thought I would make a brief appearance and speak on your behalf. Mon Mothma…standing in that room is a hero, he may not like the title and doesn't much believe in playing well with others but he is my friend and if you need help…he is your man."

"Thank you Lando…now go join Zeb before the water gets cold." The screen goes dark and Kanan looks over at the woman. "He speaks highly of you…and perhaps if you were willing…I might have a job available to you…a trial run to see if you would fit in here."

Kanan stroked the hair on his face contemplating this. It wasn't like he hadn't thought of joining the Rebellion or giving the whole 'team player' thing a try…but where did he even begin? "What do I get for joining?"

Heaving a sigh the woman rises out of her chair and as she saunters over to him he feels himself walking back. "What do you want?"

"Hey…um…I think that is close enough. Look…I've been on my own for a while now…and that has worked for me. It is just…ever since I lost my Master I've been lost…sort of haven't had a place I belong or someone to trust with my life…or theirs to mine. This is not exactly easy to admit-."

"Your fears are real ones…and most of them are shared by non-Jedi. We all ask ourselves how we can cope with something that doesn't fall into the norm, can we be mature enough to handle it and what part of ourselves we will lose in the process. Kanan…the Force is strong with you and if you can manage this mission…if you can handle what is asked of you…I will welcome you with open arms."

However, he thought as he noted how his back was to the wall…she is not welcoming me in with open arms right now. "When does this mission begin?"

Mothma smiles at him as she presses herself up against him and he feels her hand on his chest. "I will give you the day to rest up…you leave first thing tomorrow. Far as now goes…I think it is safe to say you have earned some R&R." Kanan tilts his head to the side curious by this until her lips meet his.

Kanan doesn't know how to take this…and yet…he isn't turned off by it. Kissing her back he wraps his arms around her meshing their bodies together only separated by their clothing. Placing one hand behind her head and the other at the small of her back; he groans, trailing his hand through her hair.

Mothma pulls back and gazes into his eyes before freeing herself of him. "Come with me to my quarters and we can…continue this." Mothma holds out her hand and as he takes it he feels like he is placing his life in her hands. There was something different here…and it felt nice.


Ezri stood in the sonic shower as the water ran down her form. All the excitement had left her in need of a good bathing. Thoughts of Sabine kept racing to her mind and her fingers wondered past her bellybutton trailing along her pleasure area. Of course she never went in for fear of stirring up feelings of the one she could not have. Jan…her name was Jan and it had ran out of those lips she had wanted to taste again.

Closing her eyes she listens to the water and places a hand to the glass that is filling up with fog. Ever since they had arrived on this Rebel Cruiser she and Sabine had kept apart avoiding any physical contact. Sabine was down in the engine room being led on a tour…while Hera was with Ahsoka catching up on some private time. It must be nice to have someone in your life…to know they have your back and how you have theirs. All Ezri had wanted was for someone to accept her and for them to be open to her faults and strengths. The closest she came was Sabine and look how that turned out.

Heaving a sigh she pushes herself into the wall and places her hands on her chest giving them a bit of a rub before hearing the chime to her room. Letting go she turns off the water and rushes for her towel…which she barely gets wrapped around her body before the door opens. Stepping into her room was Sabine…freshly clothed and her ears were perked up as she neared.

"Oh…uh hey…sorry about that but got impatient so hacked into the door panel. Can we talk?" Sabine stands there awkward like and Ezri just nods her head unsure what to say. Just the sight of her did her body wonders, her eyes included.

The two of them move to the couch before sitting down on either side. Ezri has her hands in her lap while Sabine is seated back with her arms folded. "This is nice."

"Ezri…that night in bed…you were pleasuring me…weren't you? I know it wasn't a dream…much as I wanted it to be someone else…the wetness felt real. When I came to…you had gone and I was left…wanting…why did you leave?" Sabine turned to look at her and Ezri felt her voice choke out a response.

"I-I don't know what you mean…I mean it had to be a dream…I know full well what you think of me and how you told me to wait…" Ezri blushed looking down and as she heard the cushion move a bit she felt her paw on her knee.

"You heard her name…didn't you?" Sabine gives her knee a squeeze and as she lifts her face she notes Sabine so close to her she could…no…that would be bad. Every impulse and every desire had to be held back lest she lose herself.

"Jan…she was your life partner right…your everything?" Ezri spoke softly but as she looked steadily at Sabine she doesn't break eye contact.

"Jan and I were close…but…we were at odds about certain things. The last real conversation we had…she wanted us to settle down and raise a family. I had my sights on the stars…and that in part tore just a little more out of our romance. She was thinking of finding another…but I can't paint her as any villain…when I couldn't fight harder…find some compromise to keep us together. Had the attack not happened…it is hard to say if we would have mended our ways or drifted apart."

Ezri had not realized how hard it had been on Sabine…even though she blamed herself equally for what went down. She had been carrying this guilt and questioning getting into another relationship because of all went down…and here she was trying to start something without considering…wow with this new piece of evidence it was clear just how badly she had behaved. It was immature of her…and she wanted to apologize.

"Sabine I am so so sorry…I had no idea…I will step back. You won't have to worry about me anymore…if you will accept my apology I'd very much like to still be your friend." It hurt her to say this aloud, giving up on her, but it sucked more not having her in her life over having her here as just a friend.

Sabine contemplates this but soon is sidling up against the side of her leg before climbing into her lap. Ezri felt her cheeks darken as she was practically straddling her lap. This was not at all what she expected and it clearly showed on her features as Sabine runs a paw through her hair. "Ezri…in telling you about Jan…I was putting the past behind me and trusting you with my heart. It was not easy…coming to this point but I realize now…I can't see myself being anywhere in this galaxy…if not with you."

Ezri began to mist up in the eyes as she heard all this. She didn't know how to respond so Sabine made it easy on her as she leaned in capturing her lips in hers. The two of them kissed each other with a passion only they knew. Sliding her hands down her back she cups her cheeks and pulls her to her more. The towel is slipping free of her form and she hardly notices, or if she did she didn't want to fix it knowing she could leave or they'd be called away.

Sabine mewled into the kiss and reaching down she removes her shirt and tosses it aside with a playful smile on her lips. "How about we try that bathing experience again?" She kisses her roughly shoving her tongue into her mouth and Ezri loses herself in what follows feeling a rush claim her body.

Authors note: I figure with this chapter I'd focus on maturing Kanan a bit and also bringing the much looked into relationship of Ezri and Sabine into full swing, finally. Mon Mothma and Kanan…who saw that coming? Anyway next chapter I will pay attention to Lando and Zeb while also touching upon Ahsoka and Hera. All these pairings will be important and the long absent Inquisitor will soon appear again to stir up trouble…for Ezri and Sabine. Let us not forget Agent Kallus. See you next chapter.