Penny: Wow, this is one doozy of a chapter, Puzzy! Think peeps are ready for it?
Puzzy: I don't know Penny - but here it is. And with a surprise ending! It actually made me cry a little, no kidding *sniff*
Penny: Aw, sweetie *snuggles* I think it turned out good...
Puzzy: So good! It was good tears, I promise :D Now, thank you SO MUCH to our pre-reader Delphius Fanfic and our beta Corey - wonderful people!
Penny: Absolutely! Without them, we would be lost! We own nothing Twilight. Now, read on, my friends, and I hope you enjoy it! :D
Puzzy: Oh yes - and how I feel for Jasper - LOL - he's got to endure SO much in this chapter *snickers*
Penny: Poor, poor J... HAHAHAHA
JPOV
With wary eyes, I followed Edward's angry steps as he retreated to the barn. Sighing, I sat back and lit another smoke, just for something to do while we waited. What I really wanted was to run after him and wrap him in my arms - to take his hurt and anger away with a soothing touch and loving kisses. Unfortunately, that was not an option. I was just as concerned as Edward seemed to be - this was getting out of hand. Not only were there rustlers after the horses, maybe even someone they knew, but violence? Life-threatening violence no less. Suddenly, living alone with Edward at the outskirts didn't feel quite as fairy-tale like as it did yesterday - now it felt quite dangerous, if the situation didn't get resolved soon.
A slight cough and the sound of boots on the wooden porch alerted us all to the black-clad doctor in the doorway. He was flanked by Emmett and the missus, all of them appearing relieved, though tired.
"Where's Edward?" Emmett asked with a questioning lift of his eyebrow.
"He went to the barn for some privacy. He seemed quite distressed, if I may say so," I answered and stamped out my cigarette butt with the heel of my boot.
"Would you go fetch him, Jasper? Zeke wants to say something about what happened, but he wants all of us to hear," Emmett's tired voice asked me, his broad shoulders sagging slightly in defeat.
"Sure, Boss. Be right back." With a nod, I walked towards the big foal barn where Edward had disappeared to. The moon gave plenty of light for me to make my way across the yard and I drew in big gulps of the cool evening air to clear my head.
Edward's distinct form was clearly visible, silhouetted as it was by the open barn door. He was leaning against the divider at Twilight and his ma's stall. He seemed peaceful as he stood there in the moonlight, so beautiful and masculine at the same time. When I approached, I could make out the furrows on his brow, hinting that his insides were not as still as he appeared. Silently, I slid up behind him and folded my arms around his shoulders in a loose embrace, offering up my support.
He gasped a little and stiffened, before relaxing into my chest and tilting his head back on my shoulder. "Thank you. I needed you so much right now and here you are," he said in a barely audible whisper.
"Not at all, Edward. And it's actually Emmett you owe the thanks to - he was the one that sent me for you. Zeke wants to tell y'all about what happened today, before he gets to resting," I muttered into his ear before I pressed a kiss to his temple.
Turning in my arms, he slid his around my waist and hugged me tightly before giving me a soft, swift kiss - barely a brush of lips, but that was enough for right now. With a final squeeze, we parted before heading out of the barn. We were both anxious to hear what Zeke had to tell us.
Back in the bunkhouse, Zeke was tired but much better. He had been washed up and dressed in a clean white nightshirt and his eyes were a bit glassy, probably from the laudanum that was sitting on his nightstand beside a glass of water and a pitcher. Emmett, Edward, the Doc and I stood around his cot and the missus hung back at the door, her hands filled with the bloodied sheets that needed washing. We were all hanging onto Zeke's lips as he told us about the events of this afternoon.
"I was roundin' up the horses with Seth and Sam when I spotted a figure crouchin' behind some of the bushes out in the south pasture. I hollered for him to identify himself, but he pretended not to hear me, so I rode closer. I didn't think much of it - sometimes kids get lost, or an injun is passin' through gettin' scared of us out there." He cut off with a cough and wiped his chin with a hankerchief.
"But when I got closer, I could see that it sure wasn't no injun, and it was too big to be a kid too. There was a horse - a big, brown geldin' - tied to the taller bushes behind and the fella had on a checkered shirt. His hat was drawn down over his eyes and he had a blue kerchief over his nose and all - and a shiny pistol in his hand, pointin' straight at me. I was scared shitless when I saw, but I got so mad, Boss. I was sure that he was one of them rustlers Jasper and Edward was tellin' us 'bout last night at supper," he said, heaving slightly and taking a sip of water.
After setting down the glass again, he continued, "so I yelled at him and spurred my horse, hopin' to scare him off. It was foolish as all hell, I know. He didn't even wait two seconds before pullin' that trigger. Lucky for me, his aim was for shit and he only got me in the shoulder. That's all I can tell y'all. A blue checkered shirt, a blue kerchief, brown geldin' and brown leather Stetson. Pretty much like any other fella round these parts."
Exhausted, Zeke lay back against the pillows and shut his eyes for a second. His breath was a bit labored and I caught the Doc's eyes with a questioning gaze.
"He's gonna be alright - he's short of breath because his lung was nicked by the bullet and that made it collapse. Its going to take a few weeks before it is fully functional again, but it will heal. He was extremely lucky that the shot hit where it did. Another inch or so and he would have bled to death from inside," the Doc answered my silent question.
We all nodded morosely and Emmett cleared his throat before telling the Doc thanks for his effort and bidding Zeke goodnight. Murmuring our good-nights, we cleared out quietly and let Zeke get his rest.
EPOV
Relief washed through me at hearing the news that Zeke was going to be alright. His words echoed in my head, threatening to make me crazy. He saw a man in the pasture, and he had shot him on purpose. Emmett would have understood if Jasper and I had let the rustlers get away with a couple of horses. He would have been pissed, but understood.
Then again, we had the honor of the ranch to protect. If Jasper and I hadn't fought the men away and they had gotten horses, surely they would have spread the word that our ranch would be easy pickings. Why did bad men have to hold grudges when they didn't get what they want? I really hoped Sheriff Swan investigated Newton. I was almost positive that he was the man I had beaten up, and I had a strong suspicion that the other man was his brother. They were always thick as thieves, pun intended.
Thankfully, the ranch had started calming down for the night. The Doc left, giving instructions to Emmett and Rose on how to dress and clean Zeke's wound and how much and often to administer the laudanum. The hands shuffled off tiredly to head to bed, and I followed Rose and Emmett to the main house.
With a quick good night, I went to my room and stripped down to my drawers. It was still so hot, I figured it was the only way I would be able to get any sleep. Laying on top of the sheet, I tried to relax my body. So much had happened over the course of the day.
I thought I wouldn't be able to sleep but the stress of the day had me drifting off in no time. The roosters crowing at dawn woke me, and I blinked against the harsh sunlight streaming through my window. Thankfully, my sleep had been dreamless.
Getting out of bed, I dressed in clean clothes and washed my face and hands in the basin in the corner. Running my hands through my hair, I viewed myself in the small mirror hanging on the wall above the basin. To me, I seemed older than I was. The crinkles around my eyes were deeper, somehow, and I could see the lines around my mouth in definition. I looked haggard. All I really wanted to focus on was getting that homestead built. That may have been wrong of me, but I just couldn't help it.
Tiredly, I trudged down the stairs and into the bustling kitchen. Emmett, at the head of the table, had a grim expression on his face, not like his usual cheerful self. Rose was silent at the stove, dishing up plates of our breakfast, which I had no stomach for. The hands were sitting around the table, talking quietly amongst themselves. The only person in the room who was cheerful was EJ, sitting on Emmett's lap babbling happily. Oh, to be innocent again.
The only open space at the table, besides Rose's chair next to Emmett, was directly across from Jasper. Sitting down, I wondered how his night went in the bunkhouse. He appeared to be tired too.
A plate of food was set before me, and I quietly thanked Rose. She took her place next to Emmet, who smiled at her while picking up her hand and giving it a gentle kiss. Then he glanced at the room at large.
"Grab hands, everybody. We all need the prayers this morning."
JPOV
Everybody joined hands and I caught Edward's eyes across the table. We continued to glance at each other through Emmett's prayer.
"Heavenly Father. We thank you for the blessings we are about to receive and ask you to keep a shielding hand over all of us. We pray for your mercy and help for Zeke in his recovery. We pray for your guidance in these troubled times and for the capture of our wrong-doers. We pray that you keep us safe and healthy. Give us your blessing, oh Lord. In your name, Amen."
Releasing our grips, we all mumbled 'Amen' with him, before we started to eat. The meal took place in unusual silence. Normally, the hands would be chatting and joking, talking about the tasks of the day, but not this morning. Emmett was silent throughout the meal and only when we were all finished did he start to give out tasks. I felt Edward's foot nudge mine under the table and caught a tiny smile at the corner at his mouth when I raised my head.
"Me and Jasper need to ride into town today with the gun from the rustlers - Edward told the Sheriff that we'd deliver it as evidence and I have to report the shooting as well," Emmett finished his little speech. Everyone rose in silence and went about their day. I hung back, waiting for Emmett to say bye to the missus and watched Edward pick up EJ, bouncing him on his arm.
He was so adorable holding the little boy, and a small pang of regret shot through me at the sight - that was the one thing I could never give him. He would never be a father, being with me. Neither would I, but I never had those urges. Edward, however, was a natural father - caring and warm, with so much love to give. It was a shame he wouldn't be able to have that in his life. The choice was not up to either of us, though, I knew that. We didn't choose to be attracted to men - we were born like this and I figured Mother Nature had her purpose with that. At least we'd have each other. That would have to be enough.
Suddenly, I sensed that I was being watched and turned my head, only to catch Rosalie's eyes. She had a twinkle in her eyes and a little secretive smile curling around her lips. She had been watching me, watching Edward. A sudden chill went through me, giving me goosebumps. What did she suspect? She had been watching us an awful lot lately, smiling her little smile. I was scared to death at the thought of her discovering our secret. How would she react, if she knew? A shudder ran through my body at the prospect, and I refocused on Emmett, following him out the door with a tip of the hat to the missus. I still couldn't shake the uneasy feeling, though. She definitely suspected something - the question was, what did she suspect?
On the way to town, we discussed what had happened yesterday. Emmett was fuming with rage and I did my best to talk him down so he wouldn't seek out Newton and beat him to a pulp. That wouldn't help our case any, even if I was tempted to do it myself. I tried to divert the conversation to the new house instead. Planning how to build it, where to put the different parts of the homestead, like the barn and the small bunkhouse made me smile with giddy excitement.
A boisterous laugh brought me out of my reverie and I peered at Emmett who's face was lit with humor. "Aw hell, Jasper - you'd think you were getting hitched, the way you look when you talk about that house! Is it that awful to live in the bunkhouse? I bet ya, after two months you'll be ready to kill Edward - puttering around with him as your only company out there!"
Smiling to myself, I just laughed it off and gave an off-hand comment about stinking socks and noisy roommates. If Emmett only knew how I really felt about this - getting hitched wasn't far from the truth, actually. It was close as we'd ever get to it, anyway.
Once we were in town we quickly sought out the sheriff and gave him the gun for evidence. Emmett reported what had happened to Zeke and referred to the Doc for medical details, if needed. Zeke's explanation was reported and he would just have to come in and sign it officially when he was back on his feet. When we were done with official business, Emmett told me he needed to talk to the blacksmith about shoeing the riding horses at the ranch. We agreed to meet back at the mercantile at noon.
With a good hour on my hands to run errands, I started towards the store. I needed some tobacco and rolling papers, plus, I wanted to order some warm clothes, a sheep-skin coat and an extra pair of boots before winter was here - it was still a long way off, since we were just nearing summer, but once Edward and I lived out there on the outskirts we wouldn't get into town very often. Regular supplies like food and tobacco and shelved goods weren't going to be a problem - Emmett or one of the hands could pick that up for us - but clothing required measurements. Boots even more so - a pair of boots that didn't fit just right would gnaw the skin right off your feet. Not only was that uncomfortable as all hell, but it could be dangerous - infections would kill you off if they went untreated, and feet were difficult to treat. Especially in the outskirts where it could take days to get hold of the Doc.
Steeling myself for the inevitable Mrs. Brandon, I went inside the mercantile. She was flittering around behind the counter, snapping at her husband and Newton while weighing off bags of sugar, sorting different small items and eating gum-drops. Her grating, high-pitched voice was hurting my ears and I winced. She was like a hummingbird, moving around so fast all the time. It confused me and set my teeth on edge. I liked calm, deliberate movements, not this flurry of actions all the time.
I cleared my throat in an attempt to get attention from one of them. As luck would have it Mrs. Brandon was the one that paused, a false, unattractive smile spread over her small features. Her eyes were alight with excitement as she regarded me like a cat would a mouse. A shiver ran through me, but I clenched my jaw and approached the counter.
"Well, hello there, Mr. Whitlock. As always, a pleasure to see you! How may we help you today?" Her saw-blade voice cut through my nerves, but I tried not to let it show how uncomfortable she made me.
"I need some tobacco and cigarette papers, Mrs. Brandon. I would like to place an order for some winter clothes and new boots as well, please," I answered as politely as I could. She was a lady, and my Momma raised me right, no matter how I felt about the wench.
She almost purred at the thought of getting her tape measure and her hands on me. Her greedy eyes made me shudder in disgust. Oh well. It would be a tale to tell Edward - he would laugh his head off at this, I was sure. With a nod, I stepped up on the small step stool and spread out my arms. Here we go again.
EPOV
Everyone stayed close to the house. I didn't let the horses out, either. While Em and Jasper were gone, Rose and EJ needed tending. While the hands cleaned the barns, fed the horses hay and did minor repairs to the house and such, I stood with Rose while she hung the wash out on the line behind the house, holding EJ on my hip. My other arm was out straight, wet clothes draped over it, so Rose didn't have to keep bending over the basket at our feet. EJ was babbling happily at us, pointing all around.
"You know, Edward, you don't have to help," Rose said kindly, and I smiled at her.
"Everyone's staying close, Rose, and honestly, I'm too tense to leave you alone while Emmett isn't here," I replied.
"Thank you," she said, and grew quiet. As I watched her hanging the clothes, I noticed a small crease between her brows.
"You're thinking awful hard about something," I offered, and she eyed me, the frown remaining only a second longer before disappearing as she smiled softly.
"Yes, I suppose I was," she replied. "I was thinking of the Fall dance coming up. There's still so much to do! And now, with Zeke hurt, I'm worried that we won't have everything ready in time."
Chuckling, I answered, "Oh, you won't have to worry about that. The hands like the dance so much, I'm sure they'll be willing to do whatever you need them to to be ready. Besides, we still have a lot of time yet."
"You're right," she smiled. "I just worry, you know."
I nodded. I did know. Em and Rose worked hard on the dance every year, and prided themselves on it. In our small town, it was the event of the year.
"So, have you decided who you'll take yet?" Rose hedged. "Em tells me Sheriff Swan is itching for you to take his daughter."
I couldn't help it. I laughed loudly and EJ obviously thought it was funny too, because he joined me. When I had calmed, I told Rose, "There's no way I'm taking her to the dance. She is whiny and clingy - "
"- and female?" Rose asked, raising a brow.
My heart and stomach immediately felt like they had dropped to my feet, and my knees weakened. I had to shift EJ on my hip so I wouldn't drop him. As I stared at Rose with wide eyes and my mouth open, she gazed at me, smug and all knowing.
"What did you say?" I managed to rasp out through my dry throat.
"Female. Edward, I have eyes, you know? I can see how you and our young Mr. Whitlock dance around each other. Especially since you had that trip for the brood mares. Plus, the other night I was letting in the chickens when I saw two tall figures making their way to the barn - they were gone an awful long time..." Her raised eyebrow accentuated the piercing, but warm, stare she was giving me.
Rosalie knows were the only two words replaying themselves over and over in my head. She knew, and I had no choice but to confess. There was no sense in lying when she had seen Jasper and I with her own eyes. I swallowed hard, my dry throat making an audible sound, and Rose took EJ from my trembling arms. I was shaking all over, and I felt sick. What was going to happen now? Would she tell Emmett? Did she already tell Emmett? Oh my God, if Emmett already knew, and he and Jasper were gone alone...oh Lord.
Lowering my head, I was suddenly very interested in my boots as I mumbled, "It's true, Rose." Then, looking up at her quickly, I hoped she could see the pleading in my eyes. "But I can't help it. I never liked females that way. They never - "
"Hush, Edward," Rose interrupted with a tiny smile. "I don't judge you. I know the Good Book says it's a sin, but I can't believe that, when it also has First Corinthians, 13:13. 'And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.'* Remember that, Edward. The greatest of all, is love."
I was stunned. Speechless. Did she mean what I thought she meant? My eyes teared up at her words, but before I could even try to say anything, she spoke again.
"Tell me something, Edward," she smiled softly. "Do you love him?"
A tear traced its way down my cheek and I tried to control my trembling hands by shoving them in the pockets of my jeans. Clearing my throat, I said the words I never thought I would ever be saying out loud, "I do love him."
Rose smiled and reached out to wipe the tears from my cheeks. "And he feels the same?"
I nodded, now unable to stop the tears. I was scared for my life, admitting this to Rose, but also, I had never felt so free.
Rose sat EJ in the laundry basket and gave him some clothespins to play with, then surprised me by hugging me close. It was brief, but exactly what I needed. I couldn't express how much Rose's approval meant to me, but there was one thing I had to know.
"Rose," I sighed, when she had let me go. "Does Em know?"
"No," she stated matter of factly, "and I'm not telling him. It's not my place to tell."
I nodded solemnly. "You're right. That will be up to me and Jasper." I paused for a minute, feeling a bit uncomfortable. Now that Rose knew, I didn't quite know what to say. "Um...thank you, Rose."
She gave me a big, pretty smile, her eyes shining. "You're welcome, Edward. I'm happy you're happy. Now, come on. Why don't we sit on the porch and watch EJ play while we have some cool lemonade?"
Smiling, I nodded to her and I took EJ around to the front porch while she took in the basket and got our drinks. My head was spinning with her confession, my confession, and her acceptance.
After I sat EJ down on the porch with a couple of his playthings, I sat in one of the chairs, waiting on Rose. I was itching to talk to Jasper and hear and see his reaction to this new knowledge.
~oOo~
*We used the New King James Bible Version for this quotation. We realize that in this time frame, they would have used the old King James Bible Version, but the wording from that wouldn't have been as efficient for the story. We call it author's liberties. Live with it *winks*
Puzzy: *hands out Kleenex*
Penny: Aww... *wipes Puzzy's tears* I hope y'all enjoyed this chapter...it was amazingly fun to write...
Puzzy: ...and emotional. *sniff* REVIEW and let us know what it made YOU feel!
Penny: Yes, please do! This is a very important turn of events for our boys. Please let us know what you think, and see y'all next time!
