Whoa Speedy,

My mother warned me about fast women. No really, you didn't have to ship the package Fed-Ex, but thank you, I am glad I got it before Kakashi has to leave again.

I found your little note tucked inside too. And, come to think of it, I did blame the poor lamented (but not very) late rooster for the compromising situation Kakashi found me and Genma in. Which probably does explain why Kakashi took such prompt and severe revenge. And no, I wasn't really planning on putting those pellets in his tea. After all, I'd be the one to suffer at least as much as he would from a sudden loss of his libido. And if this mission is as serious as I think it might be, I probably won't be getting any for quite a while as it is. Maybe I should save them for myself.

But now I have other, even more desperate, problems. I was a bit late leaving for the academy this morning. Your box had just arrived and I was stashing it next to Kakashi's manuscript in my weapons drawer, when there was a knock at the front door. I opened it to find Sakura-chan… looking very uncomfortable I might add. Naturally I invited her in, but she just stood there staring at me as if I was the last person she had expected to see, in my own home, and said, "Is Kakashi-sensei around?"

So I said. "No." If Kakashi hadn't told her anything then it was hardly my place to try and explain was it? She stared at her feet for a moment, and I must admit they are rather pretty feet. Or at least the toes peeping out of her sandals were. Pretty little pink toes with nicely trimmed toenails painted in a very complimentary shade of rose that matched her hair perfectly.

Suddenly she turned around, was it to hide a blush? That's what I do sometimes, and said, "Well then I guess I'd better be off."

Now I know the two of them been training together a lot recently, but frankly, she really didn't look at all as if she was there to train. She wasn't in the right clothes for one thing, the tight little top and short skirt she was wearing were completely inappropriate for taijutsu. And I'm pretty sure she was wearing much more makeup than she normally does too.

Before you go on another rant, I got everything you said last time. Yes, if Kakashi wanted to fool around with pretty young women there'd be a queue halfway across Konoha. Yes, I trust him, and Sakura-chan too, sort of. I kept telling myself that she's just growing up, that lots of teen girls wear tight tops and short skirts and too much makeup. But I couldn't quite kill the God-awful nagging doubt. The man has to be the worlds most dedicated reader of porn featuring studly heroes and nubile young women. And while I wouldn't exactly describe Sakura-chan as nubile, if Kakashi isn't a studly hero, then hell, I don't know who is.

Anyways, bearing in mind what you said, "Why the hell don't you just ask her if she's a rival?" I decided to do a little investigating as to what her true intentions really are. So I arranged to have some extra time for lunch and hurried over to the hospital.

It wasn't hard for me to 'run into' Sakura in the cafeteria (I am a ninja after all), and we sat together eating horrible bland hospital food. Ever so casually I remarked that she had been spending rather a lot of time with Kakashi recently.

Well at first she didn't say anything, she just chewed and chewed, like a camel that had forgotten how to swallow, but I couldn't help noticing that her neck had gone very very pink. It made my chest feel as if it was completely bound in chakra wire, being pulled tighter and tighter.

When I couldn't take anymore I croaked out, "Do you like him?"

To my surprise she looked straight at me, moist eyed, almost pleading. "You must think I'm such an idiot Iruka-sensei, and maybe it is just a crush but I can't help it, he's just so… so wonderful."

And she didn't stop there. She reached for my hand and clamped it in hers as if it was a lifeline. "I know I'm still too young, but I'm really quite mature, I mean I've seen so much and done so much, we all have. Tell me the truth, Iruka-sensei, do you think there's a chance he might like me too, one day?

As you can imagine I was floored. Surely Sakura must realize that Kakashi and I are more than just good friends. We live in the same apartment, a one bedroom apartment. Does she assume there are separate beds in there? One for him and one for me? After all, I know that she's an intelligent girl, a very intelligent girl, I was her teacher too remember.

I couldn't answer. For the first time in my life I behaved like a complete and total coward. I just spluttered something about the time and ran.

So now I only have one more day before Kakashi comes back to resolve this mess. I may have just nudged Sakura into confessing to him, and there's nothing good that could come from that, for any of us. But on the way home I stopped in the drug store and bought a bottle of pink nail varnish, just in case. I'll need to work on my technique though. At my first attempt I got it everywhere.

Yours, caught between a rock and a hard place, with shiny pink toes,

Iruka.