Lanay pulled away from Dean after her confession that even shocked her from saying it. She shook her head before getting off of him. "Need to shower; I feel gross."
"Why do I feel like this is some sort of insult?"
"It probably is underneath." She shrugged before smiling at him.
"May as well let me join. I can't get back on the plane smelling of this." Dean didn't know why he was playing along with her and not saying anything about her proclamation.
"Just be quiet. I don't want the kids waking up."
"Hey, you think I'm that loud?" Dean cocked his head to the side and smirked at her.
"You are so damn lucky you are sexy cause in my heyday I would kick you out right now."
"Get up." Lanay took his hand helping him stand up. She stayed holding his hand for a moment unsure of what made her confess something she still wasn't sure about. Her relationships were never happy; she either fucked them and left them and could only say she was in love once and after that ending swore it off. Do I love you or just love the way you make me feel? What the hell do I know about love, it doesn't do shit for you anyways.
"We'll talk about it later." Dean bent down and kissed her nose knowing her mind.
Lanay exhaled out loud before walking towards her bathroom. "My place is obviously not as big as yours but here is my bathroom." She suddenly felt insecure with her humble little apartment. It wasn't as big as Dean but she also didn't have his money.
"Do you think I care? I'm not going to look around and go man, your apartment is only 800 square feet. I'm out."
Lanay shrugged without responding watching as he took his pants off and admired his butt. It wasn't big and didn't have much shape to it but it was so well toned as she took her clothes off hating her body; she was never thin and Dean didn't know but every time he looked at her she shrunk into herself.
She allowed Dean to step into the shower first while taking towels out the closer and watched as he rinsed his head and she realized how tired he appeared to be. She stepped in behind him taking the towel and washing his back.
"I've always wanted my own personal back washer."
"Black washer? What?"
"BACK. BACK washer. Damn, Niece." He turned around smiling at her. "I mean you're more to me than that but it's an extra quality I need in a woman."
Lanay rolled her eyes handing him the towel. "Wash your damn self." She picked up her towel and started washing up while Dean watched.
"Stop looking at me."
"What?" Dean approached her as much as he could. "This shower is pointless now that I think about it."
Dean picked her up and she wrapped her legs around him as he found her opening easily, sliding in.
"How was your day?"
"Are you really about to have sex and talk?"
"You got me intrigued with this now. You can never shut up." Dean slowly slid in and out of her while still holding her up. "So how was your day?"
"It was fine, hmm… great."
"So you love me huh?"
"No... I like you and confusing emotions for love."
"You're lying." Dean gave a hard jab inside of her. "You love me."
"I like you, a lot a fucking lot more than I should but I don't love you."
"Stop lying." Dean continued pounding into her. "Just say it."
"Nope."
"Fucking say it Niece."
"It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous that you realize just how much you like them." Lanay whispered against him trying to ignore how he was making her feel. She changed the quote on her favorite novelist Agatha Christie from love to like. She had to take it back, she didn't love him even though deep in her heart she knew it wasn't true but how can you love someone that couldn't reciprocate the same emotions?
Dean didn't say anything other than stare into her eyes as he continued his ministrations. The conversation was deep for them, deeper than their initial conversations at his house. This one could form a relationship that he was already in.
Lanay had a feeling something was going to go left as she grinded on him in the shower, allowing him to go deeper inside of her while the water cascaded over them. This was a short term fling, she couldn't continue knowing she was getting feelings. It was all fun and games at first but with him in her own, the texting, the trips. She was 32, she wanted to experience a relationship and couldn't continue on this path.
"Just make me come." Lanay said.
"I got it."
Dean slowly dragged allowing his dick to rub against her clit and seeing the sadness in her eyes almost stopped him.
"Don't stop. Please don't stop."
Lanay felt herself building up again as he did exactly what she asked and continued fucking into her feeling the pressure building inside and finally coming over him and he came in her a second time that night.
"Gotta re-shower." Lanay chuckled when he let her down slowly.
"Yeah."
Neither of them spoke as they restarted their shower and got out. Lanay threw on one of his t-shirts and he threw his clothes back on and they reentered the living room sitting on the couch.
"My flight leaves in a few hours."
"Oh, do you want me to call you a cab or something?"
"Nah. I got it." Dean scooted closer to her.
"So you love me?"
"You won't let this go."
"I can't."
"I don't know what I feel for you. I like you a lot, more than I should probably and I know in the end I'm going to end up being the one hurt. It sucks. I didn't expect this because I'm normally so detached from everything but here we are." Lanay ran her hands through her wet hair before smiling up at him. "I can't 100% say I love but I can say it with 80% certainty. It's not like I didn't know you other than more emotionally but what I did know before this drew me in. You drew me in and you did win control over me in some ways even if it wasn't your initial plan to have it this way but…" Lanay trailed off when he drew her in closer. "I don't want you to say it back out of pity, just please don't do that."
"I couldn't disrespect you like that."
"Thanks."
"Why do I feel like you're ending it?"
"I am. I have to."
"If I hadn't asked were you going to tell me?"
"Probably not."
"If I text will you answer?"
Lanay shook her head at him. "Probably not. It will hurt to hit delete but I have those 2 in the bedroom to think about and my own feelings. You'll find happiness with Renee; I trust you will. You already did before us."
Dean's arm started to trail up and down her arm not believing what was happening.
"Emotions are a silly thing and I thought I turned them off but you brought them back up again. Damn you."
"I'm sorry."
"You don't mean it jackass."
"How can you still be mean to me at this time?"
"You should probably get ready to go. I know you're tired and I would let you sleep here but…"
"But it's too much for you huh?"
"Yeah. It's too much for me."
Dean removed his arms hating the empty feeling he was getting already and not knowing what to do with it but he couldn't give her what she wanted. It was a one-off; he wanted to control her and he did but not in the way he expected. He took his phone out to get an uber to the airport while donning his jacket and pulling out his sunglasses
"Will you still come to the shows?"
"Not for a while."
"So I won't see you?"
"Not for a while."
"Damn. Okay." He wanted to say more but knew his words were going to make it worst.
"Uber is fucking quick at this time."
"I guess it is."
"Well…" Dean trailed off having so much to say to the girl in front of him, he wanted to hold her.
"Well you got someone you got your claws into and going to make her happy." Lanay finished knowing that wasn't what he was going to say but she had to say it. She needed to remind herself of what she was doing and why she was letting him go. "I'll be okay. Hey, I went three years before you what's another 3 more?"
"3 years after the good that I put on you? Come on?"
Lanay threw her head back to laugh at him. "I hate you."
"You don't and that's part of the problem." Dean winked as he put his hand on the door.
"Jon wait." Lanay flung herself on him giving him a final kiss, had to remember this moment, the kiss, the way he held her back. It was something she was going to keep in her head forever. Jonathan indeed did imprint on her and she would never take it back.
She pulled away slowly biting his lip. "Good luck out there and don't get hurt."
"Same to you Niece Lanay."
Lanay watched him as he walked out the door and that's when the tears finally came. She hated that she had to do it but it was in the best interest for her heart. The time she spent with Dean made her want real love; she thought she forgot about what it could feel like to be wanted but there he was. He helped her in a sense and in spite of her breaking into small pieces she thanked him for it.
A/N: It's not the end yet.
