**Characters and some story lines are owned by Veronica Roth**

TRIS – 1969

Standing just inside the wardrobe of my bedroom I try very hard to stifle a groan as I slowly lift my arms to pull my t-shirt over my head. Looking into the full length mirror I can't believe the person looking back at me, it sometimes seems so surreal and I am certainly not the same person I was mere months ago. The first thing I notice is the big black eye that is now turning nice shades of purple, yellow and green, it was a souvenir of my last training lesson with a very enthusiastic Lynn.

Reaching up I slightly wince as my fingertips brush lightly against bruised skin. Auntie wasn't too happy when she saw it and lit into Uncle and Amar causing them to do some very fancy damage control, just as well she didn't see the multiple bruises peppering my torso too. I however wear them with pride, each one is a testament to my commitment that brings me one step closer to fulfilling my promise to complete my father's case and bring my families murders to justice.

In the last few weeks my time has been consumed with training and I have found myself connecting with the others forming a rather unusual bond. Forced together we all share the same common denominator with each person bringing their own unique skill to the group. The biggest surprise was my immediate friendship with Chris who is now circling my bedroom checking each tiny thing with curious interest.

Everything about us is a complete polar opposite. She is a tall dark beauty with curves in all the right places, I'm a short pale plain jane with slight bumps. She is forthright with her thinking and very candour, I'm the quite achiever who keeps her thoughts to herself. She give the impression of warrior with a don't mess with me attitude, I'm a wallflower who gladly blends into the surrounds. From the first day though we seemed to click and became firm friends fast. Bit by bit she opens herself that extra inch each day to me.

"So this is them huh?" Chris asks as she picks up a picture of my family and I at my graduation, "your family?"

Pulling my braid out from underneath the shirt and adjusting it I poke my head around the door to see what she is looking at.

"Yeah," with one final glance at my eye I shut the door and walk over to look at the picture with her, "that's my mum and dad, and that's my brother," I point them out to her.

After a few moments of silence Chris places the picture back down onto my dresser, "I met your mum. She was really nice to me and Rose. I never met your dad though."

"Rose?" I question still looking at my family.

"My sister," she picks up the other picture, "this your boyfriend?" she asks indicating to Robert.

"No just a friend. Everyone thinks we were but we grew up together and he is more of a best friend brother kind of guy to me. That's his sister Susan, she was going to marry Caleb," I say pointing her out.

"She's pretty in a plain kind of way," Chris says before returning the picture to its place, "do you still talk to them?"

"I've written letters. Robert is in the Vietnam at the moment so I haven't heard back from him yet but Susan has. She has started working at my mother's old clinic, helping out in the office and organising fund raising. She's talking about going to medical school now which I think would be great for her."

"Really? What did she want to do before?"

"Get married and have a family," I sigh thinking of my future nieces and nephews that will never be born.

"Well if she's like your mum than she's going to be a natural," Chris says taking a step away from the pictures and continues her curious sweep of my bedroom.

"So how did you meet my mum?" I ask picking up my fire pendant and groaning as I try to place it around my neck.

My discomfort causes Chris to look at me and smile, "need a hand?"

"God yes please," I reply with relief.

She reaches for my necklace and moves behind me, "I had made the mistake of getting caught up with the wrong kind of people and with the help of your mum and dad they hid me and saved me," she finishes adjusting the chain and stands in front of me looking at my blackened eye, "come one, a little bit of makeup and no one will know the difference," tugging on my arm she leads me to sit on the bed, taking a small rainbow striped purse out of her bag.

"So what happened?" I ask watching her rummage around the contents, pulling out a small bottle of flesh coloured liquid.

Tipping a small amount onto her fingertip she lightly dabs it onto the bruise, "My ex tended to attract some bad mojo. Your dad found out that there was a hit out on us from one of his contacts. Anyway long story short let's just say that they helped make me disappear permanently. My ex wasn't so lucky."

Feeling her stop I open my eyes slightly to look at her, she is staring out the window biting the inside of her cheek as she remembers, bringing herself back she looks at my eye and smiles, "that should work, almost like new," replacing the lid she tosses the small bottle back into the purse. "As long as I'm dead Rose is safe. I miss her everyday but your dad found her a real nice family in Florida who took her in and Uri checks on her for me every now and then, brings me a few pictures and lets me know what she's doing."

Pulling out a tube of gloss she puckers her lips, lightly coating them with a pale shade of red, "here try this colour," she says handing a different coloured tube to me.

"How old is she?" I ask pulling the lid off and testing the colour on the back of my hand.

"Just turned 16 and in her final year of high school. She's always wanted to be a teacher, God knows she's got the brains for it and the patience."

"What did you want to do, you know, if things were different?"

"A fashion designer. I just love clothes, accessories, make up. It's such a chick thing but I can't help it," she pushes the lid closed and rubs her lips together, "who knows maybe one day my designs will be on the cover of Vogue."

"You still could you know," I reply and rub my lips together after applying the gloss, "I'd love to see your designs sometime."

"Really?" she raises a questioning eyebrow, "maybe one day. In the meantime we have to go get Lynn before she's arrested."

"What?" I laugh, "you know what don't bother to explain."

"It's Lynn," Chris replies also laughing.

"It's Lynn," I mimic.

I've discovered Lynn isn't the kind of person that hides anything. If you piss her off she makes darn sure that you know about it. If she doesn't agree with you she will stand her ground and argue with you straight to your face even if you can prove her wrong. If she is in a bad mood or angry she doesn't try to hide it and makes sure everyone knows. She also happens to have one kick arse punch that I am still recovering from. She is vocal, stubborn, tough, honest, passionate and inflexible all wrapped up in a small bundle of woman. It's like walking a continuous gauntlet, never knowing which one of Lynn's moods you are going to encounter but I enjoy the challenge and find it refreshing.

Grabbing my journal and bag off my desk I lead the way back down to the kitchen, throwing out a casual goodbye to my Aunt and Uncle as we head out the front door.

"So where are we meeting her?" I ask as we jog down the front stairs and start walking towards the park.

"Ashbury Street," Chris replies looking over her shoulder. It's something I've noticed she does a lot in public, constantly on alert.

"Are Will and Cara going to be there?" I ask and notice a slight shade of rose highlight Chris's cheeks at the mention of Will. Something else I've noticed whenever his name is mentioned.

"Will is working an afternoon shift with his friend Al. He wanted us to meet up later after training so you could meet him," she replies.

Now it's my turn to blush, "I'm not interested in starting any kind of relationship up with any boys Chris. I want to concentrate on my training and ring that bloody bell."

"First, it's not a setup, Al's a nice guy. He's studying Accounting and works afternoons with Will for some extra money. Second, give up on the bell Tris. I've been here for almost a year and no one has ever come close to ringing the stupid thing," she punches the air in front of her, clearly frustrated, "and third, Cara will not be joining us because she has her pretty little nose stuck in a book, as per usual."

"Fine, I'll use my best manners when meeting Al," I giggle, "I'll smile accordingly, respond at all the right times and even restrain my urges to try out the new death grip that George showed me yesterday."

"You're so funny, I can just imagine poor Al's face when you move in and lock your elbow around his neck."

"Hey Ya," I pretend to karate chop the air in front of me making us both laugh.

Walking our way along Ashbury Street I marvel at the psychedelic sounds, sights and even the smells that engulf this area. The rich aroma of incense entwined with Jimi Hendrix, The Doors and John Lennon made my entire being buzz. Small groups of people would randomly converge playing folk tunes on guitars and greeting everyone who passed with a lazy smile. One small barefoot girl with curly hair to her waist embraced me and gave me a daisy which I immediately placed behind my ear.

I remember a couple of years ago seeing pictures in the newspaper when thousands of people came together here. Their free spirit and ideals about gender equality really appealed to me at the time. At one stage during my soul searching I admit to giving consideration to running away and joining a hippie commune, becoming a flower child. Of course it was only brief fantasy but I still respected their ideals of free love.

"So why are we here?" I ask Chris

"We're meeting Lynn." Chris replies dodging a crack on the pavement.

I can't help but laugh, "I know that but what is she doing?"

"She is burning her bra," Chris replies as if it's the most common thing in the world to do.

"Of course she is," I answer with a shake of my head. I give up trying to work them out sometimes.

Turning a corner we come across a large group of men and women, casually sitting on the ground or leaning against one another. All of them are paying attention to a woman with a megaphone and shaved head at the front.

"….and this," she shakes her bra out beside her, "is what confines us, restricts us, dictates to us who we should be in a society dominated by men…"

"Oh boy," I hear Chris mumble beside me.

"….in a time when they would lead you to believe that this discrimination does not exist it is clear that women do not have the same opportunities that the men do. Those of us that reject or do not conform to their way of thinking and try to break from the confines of their suppression are immediately labelled as unfeminine simply because they aspire to be someone other than a wife or a mother…."

"WAHOOO! Right on Lynn," I yell out and clap.

"Don't encourage her Tris," Chris replies with a smile. I know she is thinking the same thing.

"…. Who here is brave enough to join me in burning this symbol of our suppression….."

I turn to look at Chris and reach up underneath my shirt.

"What are you doing?" she asks raising her eyebrows at me.

"Oh come on Chris," I reply, unhooking my bra, "I know you want to."

I slip the straps from my shoulders and shimmy out of the cups letting my breasts fall free, "God I feel so naughty," I say to Chris as I pull it out from my shirt sleeve.

"I can't believe you Tris," Chris says and bites her lower lip, her eyes wide with mischief. Before I know it she has hers slipped out from her top also and swings it above her head with a Yahoo.

Cheers come from the crowd as we make our way to the front and stand with Lynn, one at a time we burn them.

"Well I was expecting a little more poof," Chris says as we watch the fabric sizzle in our fingers before dropping them into a large metal drum.

In the distance I can hear a police siren steadily making their way towards us and look over to Chris and Lynn.

"Shit it's the cops," Lynn says, "we got to get out of here."

Grabbing each other's hands we make our way through the crowd and back towards the park, risking quick glances over our shoulders to make sure we are in the clear.

"You know I never realised just how sexy it feels to walk around without your bra," Chris says as she looks down at her chest.

"I'm surprised that yours didn't burn the street down with all the extra padding you put in there Chris," Lynn says with a smirk.

"I'll have you know that this," she smooths down her top over her chest, "is all me and it's all women thank you."

"And you Tris, I'm surprised there was even enough fabric to burn," Lynn continues.

"Hey!" I reply kind of embarrassed by the truth. Looking at them I see both biting back grins and have to laugh, "at least they aren't going to get in the way with training this afternoon ladies."

"Shit," they both respond in unison realising that today's schedule included the obstacle course.

"It's going to be painful," Chris's face drops, "do you think we have enough time to buy one on the way there?"

"Come on, if we hurry we can stop off at the shop to pick up a couple," Lynn says picking up the pace.

Almost an hour a later we stroll into the warehouse wearing huge smiles and new bras.

"You're late ladies," George calls from across the floor.

"It's all Lynn's fault," Chris yells back and tosses her bag into the corner.

"Yes, if she didn't convince us to relinquish our… what was it 'symbol of oppression'…." I say tapping my chin with my finger, "or was it 'break free from out male dominated shackles…."

"Alright enough," George says shaking his head.

"Long story short George," Lynn says as she unhooks her earing, "is we had to stop and buy new bras."

"If you're involved Lynn I don't even want to know why," George replies while his cheeks turn a lovely shade of pink, "and why do you smell like smoke. No never mind. You know the drill, warm ups and today we are concentrating on the obstacle course."

My sore muscles scream when I start warming up, they are protesting the 100 up-downs, 20 minute skip and god knows how many sit ups that are considered by George and Amar as warming up. I won't admit that it is a little easier to do now than when I first started.

Halfway through the routine I can't put my finger on it but for some reason I'm a little off today. Hopping my way through the tyres of the obstacle course I realise its Tobias. When I had burned away my suppression this morning I had inadvertently also burned his scent from the handkerchief I had failed to remove. I had come to rely on it, depend on it. It was my security.

I chase Chris towards the wall and grab onto the rope to help pull myself over when suddenly I feel the world around me spin. I feel like I'm being pulled towards him.

'Tobias…..'

'Beatrice….'

He strides towards me, wearing his masculinity with confidence. With a swoop of his arm he wraps it around my waist pulling me in closer to him and I feel my nipples pebble as my breasts are pressed firmly against him, his taunt muscles ripple underneath us and he makes every inch of me feel like a woman. Pressing his lips to mine, his tongue sweeps my mouth causing my inner core to bubble with fever as he slips his fingers through my hair.

I missed his smile, his voice, his presence, his comfort. I missed him, everything. 'I miss you' the sudden need to tell him enters my mind as we deepen the kiss, matching each other stroke for stroke.

'Come back to me' his voice echoes to me. When he tightens his hold a soft moan escapes my mouth into his.

I can feel his firmness pressed hard against my lower stomach as we continue to mesh together and for a brief moment I surrender to the bliss.

All too soon I am pulled from my sanctuary, as much as I want to stay wrapped in this moment I can't not yet. It's not our time. Leaning up close to his ear 'It's not our time yet Tobias,' I whisper.

Stepping back from him I feel myself smile as I see his beautiful ocean blue eyes filled with so much love and passion boring straight into my heart and soul. Hearing a soft groan as he reaches for me but this was all I can allow myself, this moment. I have to leave, I have to finish and I know that I can't let him near me again because I will abandon all self-control.

As I drift away a wispy fog surrounds us. I can feel myself slip away further and further from his grasp, moving back to where I should be.

'Beatrice…' I hear him call my name desperately and it tears at my heart, dissolving the delicate threads of resolve.

'Soon Tobias,' I tell him, I have to try to make him understand, 'I have to finish first.'

'Finish what Beatrice? I don't understand,' I hear him again in my mind.

'My family,' I say remembering them, remembering my vow for revenge, remembering I will never hear their voices again, remembering how I will never feel their warm embraces, remembering the future that was robbed.

My fingertips itch to feel him again, just once more. I brush them lightly across the back of his neck before I feel myself being pulled back to the warehouse.

'Beatrice…..' I hear him shout in desperation.

'Soon Tobias. I promise,' I whisper and feel a tear run down my cheek.

Oomph…...

"What the hell happened to you?" I hear Chris ask as she drops to the floor next to me and pears down from where she is standing above, "one minute you were on my tail as we climbed the wall and the next you're on your arse."

"I'm fine," I reply, not really knowing what to tell her. Hearing myself panting I try to catch my breath as my mind still reels on what had just happened. Tiny goose bumps pucker my skin with the memory.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," I reply nodding my head. I close my eyes to try and catch my breath, the image of Tobias still burned behind my eyelids.

"I admit it was funny as hell seeing you sprawled out like this on the ground," she replies, her keen eyes scanning me up and down, her frown now replaced by a half-cocked smirk. "Are you sure you're ok, you didn't hit your mouth did you. Your lips look swollen Tris."

I start to laugh but it comes out more of a groan. Shifting slightly I can feel the sting along my back from where I have landed on the padded mat on the floor. Slowly I regain my thoughts through the fog and my focus is on the old timber beams of the ceiling. The large brass bell that hangs in the middle stays silent, mocking me.

"Soon Tobias," I whisper, "soon."

SNEAK PEAK AT THE NEXT CHAPTER….

"So Uri's coming for a visit?" I ask as I continue to work the small punching bag.

"Next week. He's bringing his girlfriend with him."

"Did he say why?"

"Something about a case apparently. He didn't offer any other specifics except he needs to look for somewhere to live."

I stop what I'm doing and look at Zeke, "he's moving back?"

"Not just yet but in a few months apparently."