The seconds seemed to slowly slide by like water droplets splattered against a window on a rainy day. James and Shepard looked at each other in silence almost like prey and predator. Although right now it was unclear as to who was who or maybe they were both prey.

"Well first of all Lola." James tried to lighten the mood and ease the tension, "That wasn't a question." his heart was starting to beat faster despite all of his silent protests. It was too easy. She was making it so easy. James fought back an impending sense of anxiety.

There was nothing difficult about the choice but the struggle to do what was right (in his mind) was not an easy feat.

He worked hard to uphold who he was as a person, as a soldier. Yeah, maybe others thought that he was just some muscle-head and he would go for anything with long hair and breasts. All brawn and no brains. But he knew who he was, Shepard knew who he was.

He worked harder than anyone. Paid in spades with his blood, sweat, and more blood. He didn't have tears to spare, they weren't payment. It was a bonus slapped on the side.

Shepard blinked and then looked away. It seemed that he took too long to reach a decision and Shepard just gave him a small smile and stood up to walk away, "Forget about that lieutenant." she was acting as if the rejection wasn't a big deal. But maybe it really wasn't a big deal and she wasn't acting.

James' head snapped up and he looked at Shepard almost like a lost child. What was he supposed to do? He knew what he wanted but he also knew what he shouldn't want. If he went after this..went after her, there would be no going back. What should he do?

Go against what he was working to be, go against the person that he was.

"See you in the morning lieutenant." Shepard gave him a two finger salute and turned her back on him. She made sure her face was arranged properly into a genuine smile before beginning to walk.

Fuck it. James thought to himself and he grabbed her wrist feeling alive and hyper aware in the moment, "Wait Lola." he tugged her back gently to keep her from walking away from him. His hands were cold and his heart was beating faster than it ever had before.

Shepard's eyes were opened wide but she didn't say anything and instead waiting patiently for what he was going to say next.

"Just wait..." James said looking deep into her eyes there was a pause in his words before he found it in himself to push the words out, "I can't now." he gently brought her into his arms and hugged her to his chest. God, she was warm and soft and just felt right, "But just wait a little bit." he brought his hands down to her surprisingly slim waist and let them slide back up to her lean torso.

He took a deep breath trying to restrain himself from doing anything more. Because right now, this was enough. This was perfect.

He felt a hand slide up his chest and wrap around his neck bringing him down so that he was directly in front of Shepard's face. Her expression was tinged with sadness but a soft smile still curved her lips, "Is that a promise Vega?" she let her fingers stroke the back of his neck.

"It's a promise." he whispered back and let his own rough fingers trail down the sides of her face. Softly. Gently. A shock of exhilaration shot through him as he stared into Shepard's eyes. She was in his arms, she was...letting him name the terms and she didn't push for anything else.

He knew Lola wasn't the type to force her way into something. She was never one to use her status or power to get what she wanted. But it was still something that made James' chest thud with some unexplainable emotion.

Somehow they ended up on her bed entangled within each other's arms with the sheets underneath them. There was nothing that could be heard now, the laughter and music had died away when the night took over. And all that was left behind were the remaining bits of the odd murmurs, the deep even breaths the rest of the crew members took while they slept and the occasional drunken stagger to the bathroom as they did what they could to puke in the toilet bowl rather than around it.

James could smell the faint scent of roses and rainfall from Shepard as she shifted in his arms. He never knew she could carry the scent of something else other than gun oil and smoke. There was complete peace settling inside of him and for once in what seemed to be a long time he felt like he could relax, "Por dios Lola." James sighed and closed his eyes as he absently rubbed a thumb up and down her shoulder.

"What?" Shepard seemed to snuggle in deeper into his arms and rest her head against his chest. He smelled of leather, soap, and gun oil even in his regular civilian clothing.

"I don't know." he let out a chuckle and opened his eyes, "I just..." there was a pause as he tried to organize his thoughts, "This should have happened sooner." was all he could say. A far cry from what he wanted to say or express but it was the best he could do.

Neither one of them wanted to acknowledge what they were going to face tomorrow.

He was so stupid. He should have taken this step sooner. What had there been to think about? What had he struggled over?

His ideals. His ambitions. Himself.

"We have time." Shepard whispered. She would take a couple of hours with him rather than nothing at all.

"It's not much." James half growled pressing his lips on her temple for a moment before turning away. He wanted more but he would wait. This night was too good to ruin it with that lust coiled up tightly inside of him.

He would wait.

There was a quiet laugh, "We'll have our time." she traced patterns absently on his chest savoring the warmth from his body. It was the kind of warmth that only a human was capable of producing.

"I'm holding you to it commander." he teased and flinched a little when she smacked him on the chest but pulled her closer to him when she started to pull away.

"Don't call me that." Shepard laughed and tried to frown but failed when he kissed her softly instead. He tasted of whiskey, smoky and a little sour.

They exchanged sleepy whispers while lying there in each other's arms and occasionally traded kisses when one of them got an overwhelming sensation of loss. The two missed each other even when they were looking into each other's eyes. It almost felt like some college romance. Almost.

Neither of them noticed the figure that had been intending to wake them up for the day quietly slink away from the door to leave them alone with each other. The two together made a picture that was difficult to interrupt. Wrapped up in their intimacy, the level of emotions that were being displayed to each other seemed to create another dimension.

The day cycle had just begun and with it, the Citadel was beginning to awaken. Artificial lighting resembling the eerie glow of dawn on earth, or any planet for that matter was emerging gradually through the cracks in the shut windows. Shuttle cars were gradually beginning to fill the air forming the invisible traffic lines that lead to various destinations. In a large trashed apartment there were roughly 16 individuals still laying down where they had drunkenly fallen asleep some alone, some together, their eyes opened slowly as they awoke one by one (with the exception of Grunt) and absently looked at the space in front of them. No one moved, no one said anything, they all just seemed to soak in the present.

The silence was beautiful.

A moment of reprieve from what they were all going to be facing next.

The day had just begun.