my thanks to ms24
The flap dropped down and Johnny felt his tension ease as he took in his surroundings. The sweat lodge was small with barely enough room for the four of them. Bent willow branches formed a low roof over which Wolf's buffalo robe had been thrown. A central pit held smooth river rocks while the raised seating platform was covered with horse blankets, protecting their rumps from the dry grasses. There was a pleasant smell of horse and newly cut grass and wood in the lodge.
As his eyes adjusted to the dim light Johnny could see his body was almost luminous, it was so pale. By contrast David was practically invisible while Tony and Wolf were indistinct. Pressing his thighs together he hunched his shoulders, suddenly conscious again of his naked state. A quick glance at his companions told him he was the only one worried. Wolf was to his right, next to the door. He had his eyes closed, perhaps he was praying? To his left Tony remained still, while David had his eyes closed too.
Clearing his throat, Wolf sat up with a cup of water. Taking a mouthful, he spat it into his hands and then rubbed it over his entire body, standing slightly to reach his nether regions. Passing the cup he motioned for Johnny to do the same, and so the cup was passed from hand to hand until it returned to Wolf. Taking the remaining water into his mouth, he spat out onto the rocks which erupted into an angry cloud of steam.
Instantly Johnny felt the sweat erupt and he was soon dripping as the steam rose to the roof and spread downward. He covered his nose for a moment when the heat seared his nostrils, but his body soon adjusted and he breathed deeply as Wolf crushed some cedar pods to throw them into the pit. "For serenity," he said, as the pods spit and jumped, releasing their bouquet.
Picking up a pipe already lit, Wolf held it up high, to the north, the south, the east, and the west.
"Spirits hear me.
Your pipe is filled, come and smoke in peace and friendship.
I am far from knowing anything, but spirits hear me. Old men taught me this way and if I make a mistake, turn it into good.
We men that enter your sweat lodge for healing, for wisdom; going out may we leave all that is bad.
Spirits hear me.
Take thoughts of us, that good may come to us, to our families and to our loved ones.
Your pipe is filled, come and smoke."
Taking a deep draw on the pipe, Wolf held the smoke in for a long while, his eyes closed, until he released it slowly. The smoke was sweeter than any Johnny had encountered before and it lacked the bitter sting of the usual baccy. Tony stirred beside him and chuckled in anticipation. He obviously knew it.
The pipe was passed from hand to hand. Johnny followed the example set by the others and took a deep draw. The smoke was smooth yet cooling, he found he could hold it in without discomfort, but it was rather ordinary and he wondered at Tony's enthusiasm.
The flap was raised, letting in the cooler night air and Johnny wondered if it was over as David rose and left, but he returned in a moment with another hot stone held on a forked stick. As it was carefully placed into the pit Wolf explained, "We open the door between prayers to allow them to reach the spirits."
Once the flap was dropped again, more water was sprinkled as the pipe was passed. David began to speak and Johnny looked over in surprise. His voice seemed to come from far away, the lodge suddenly seemed much larger.
"... and so I feel greatly encouraged in the future of this fair country when I witness first hand the courage, the wisdom and the compassion shown by my three companions here with me this evening. It is indeed a glorious occasion when an Indian, an American, a Mexican and a Negro can sit down together in friendship and tolerance in the cause of peace and healing..."
Johnny was totally mesmerised. Not only was he hearing the words, albeit from a far distance, but he could also feel the words, each syllable a fluctuation in the airwaves, causing ripples to reach out and stroke him. David's deep smooth voice sending the ripples lapping and laughing, creating a tingling response running throughout his body.
The pipe passed again and the flap was raised as David collected another rock for the pit. Wolf returned with more water, was it imagination or real, that he no longer seemed to limp? Johnny drank the water gratefully, his thoughts turning to those smoked fish. Why did he feel so ravenous?
Tony's voice washed over him like a warm breeze on a summer's eve... "we have so much love for each other and yet there are times when I feel that it isn't enough, there's something missing. I don't think I'll ever know the real Nina, she spent so many years pretending, pretending to be happy with her clients, that now I sometimes wonder if she knows how to be herself, if she knows who she even is. Does the Nina I know and love exist... or is she another of her creations?..."
The flap opened and Johnny caught a brief glimpse of a star studded sky before it was blocked by the others' leaving. Was it over? Had he spoken? What had he said? Everyone seemed pleased, euphoric even. Damnit, what had been said? Did he talk about Kimberly? Did he mention Kimberly and Wolf? Pulling at Tony's arm, he whispered, "What did I say?"
Pausing, Tony patted him on the cheek, "It's between you and your spirit, Johnny. Just between you and your spirit."
With sudden clarity Johnny realised a burden had been removed. Whatever would happen would happen and he was powerless to alter it. Smiling, he crawled out of the sweat lodge thinking of Michelle and wondering where they could build a lodge at home. He and Michelle naked together, now there was a thought.
The air felt cool and fresh; his bare skin was smooth and glistening as he flicked away the last of the sweat. It was good to feel clean again. Looking with distaste at his bundled clothing stiff with sweat, dirt, and Lord only knows, he left the clothing and followed the others down to the creek. When he first stepped into the shallows he gave a gasp of delight. Warm, the water ran across his skin like a silken bedsheet. Lying prone to submerge his entire body, he spread his arms and legs wide as the searching fingers of water ran down his body. He revelled at the caress while the stars overhead swirled in a myriad of patterns until, with a contented sigh, he closed his eyes.
Held by the moving embrace of the water all he could hear was the distant beat of Michelle's heart as it pulsed in time with his own.
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