I warn you, they get pretty heavy in this chapter! Keep that in mind please!
-Chapter 12-
The day had been slow and McCoy was walking through the halls toward the ensign's room. He'd hoped that he could bring something to him, have an excuse for going to his room rather than calling him to the med bay, but there was nothing and the things he wanted to talk to Chekov about were far too personal to chat about with Nurse Chapel sitting a short distance away at the same table. He paused for a moment to gather himself, then pressed the button to inform Chekov that there was someone at the door. It opened with a small whoosh and there he was, apparently fresh from cleaning; his hair was wet and he wore fresh lounging clothes rather than his uniform. McCoy nearly choked on his own tongue. Luckily, Chekov saved him by talking first.
"Doctor?" he said in surprise, eyebrows raising slightly, "vhat can I help you viss?" The doctor took a small breath.
"May I come in?" he asked, "I wanted to ask you a few questions." The look of confusion he got almost prompted an explanation from him, but Ensign ushered him inside and motioned to a chair.
"Eez zees about vork or closer to a social wisit?" he asked, "eef eet eezn't about vork zen I can offer you a drink." McCoy looked at him in surprise for a moment, then laughed nervously and shook his head.
"Not about work, but I still turn down the drink," he said, "I find that the more I drink, the more stupid things I do. Thanks though." Pavel shrugged and sat at the small table with the man.
"Vhat can I do for you, Doctor?" he asked, almost pleasantly. McCoy rubbed his palms over his slacks for a moment, trying to find the words to say to get his questions out.
"It's about… uh… back when we were stuck down on that planet," he said, "when I was still under the effects of the drug-" his words screeched to a halt when a red blush ran over Chekov's face and his mouth dropped open. Well, that answered his first question. The ensign certainly remembered what had happened. That look on his face would have made McCoy chuckle, had he not been so nervous.
"Uhm… vhat about eet?" the navigator asked. McCoy took another breath.
"What happened back there?" he asked, "the last thing I remember was you taking a swig of that fruit drink and then I was on the ship again and trying to figure out why people were treating me like a penitentiary patient. I've been told about my behavior on the ship and some memories have come back to me, but I still don't know the whole story. What happened?" Pavel frowned for a moment at this, thinking even as he blushed more. Then he stood.
"You may not vant a dreenk," he said, "but I vill haff one. I need one eef zis ees going to be ze topic off conwersation." He made his way to the cupboard where he'd grabbed the vodka before and took out another bottle of it along with a single glass. McCoy frowned at this, not liking the reaction.
"Did I hurt you?" he asked then, concern on his face, unable to be hidden. His worst fears may have come to light and if they did, he'd never be able to look the kid in the eye again. Chekov paused as he closed the cupboard, then shook his head, bringing glass and bottle to the table.
"You deed not," he said, "you vere ze one who made sure zat I vas safe. You protected me vhile ve vere een ze forest." McCoy stared for a moment.
"Then why is it that you seem so unhappy with the fact that I've come to ask you about it?" he asked, now terribly confused. Pavel, now sitting in the chair, regarded his glass for a while in silence.
"You know, for a vhile zere I really sought zat you vere going to hurt me," he said, "but instead you protected me." He took a breath and closed his eyes, going back to the very moment when he'd taken the drink from the chief. "I vasn't sure vhat to expect vhen ze chief gafe me ze dreenk. And vhen ze members of ze tribe began to attack I sought I vas a goner. But zen you vere zere, safeing me and bringing me avay from ze danger." He looked at McCoy then, blue eyes practically glowing with sincerity. "You deedn't hurt me ewen once." McCoy had to swallow his heart at that look in the boy's eyes.
"Then why your reluctance to tell me what happened?" he asked. The boy didn't look away.
"Do you remember vhat happened vhen you keessed me?" he asked, "ze last time I saw you before ve vent planetside?" McCoy nodded, guilt arising, but not terribly strong now that he knew Pavel didn't think any worse of him.
"What has that got to do with it?" he asked. Pavel made a face.
"Viss all due respect, doctor, you are a homophobe. You keesed me, and zen you ran avay and deedn't say anozzer vord to me until ve vere trapped on an unfamiliar planet and you vere too drugged to ewen know vhat you vere doing. And seence zen, you haffn't spoken to me about eet. I am afraid zat eef I tell you vhat happened down zere, you vill not like me as a friend anymore." It sounded almost juvenile, especially coming from the young man, but it made sense. Sadly, it also just made McCoy wonder more.
"You and I have been through too much for me to not like you," he said, "and now you're making me wonder again. Just come on and tell me already. I give you my word as a God fearing man that I will not think any less of you." Pavel nearly winced at this.
"Right," he said, looking down at the table, "I vas preetty surprised vhen you picked me up off of my feet and ran avay eento ze forest. Eet vas a you zat I had newer seen before. You brought me to a safe place vhere ze natives and ze animals could not get us… kind of a caiff een a tree. And zen you left me on one side of ze caiff, and you vent to ze ozzer side. You already know vhat ze drug vas doing to you, so I do not haff to explain zat part." McCoy flushed slightly and pinched the bridge of his nose to hide it.
"I do know," he said softly, "I read the full report on the plant as soon as it was completed. Which is why I came to ask if I hurt you. What kept me from trying?" He couldn't imagine himself being able to do the right thing when he wasn't even in his right mind. He shushed and let the ensign finish talking.
"Vell," he said, looking away again, "you vere… een a lot of pain… and somesing about ze drug vas making you seem like you vere loosing your mind seemply for ze vant of contact. I obliged." McCoy stared.
"You what?" he demanded, dumbfounded at this new turn. Chekov winced away.
"You needed help," he said, trying to sound firm, but failing, "I vas ze only one zere who could help you, so I deed. I deed not make you eempure or anysing… I vouldn't do zat to you… I seemply helped seence I knew how." McCoy's mouth went dry.
"Do you mean that you…" he trailed off, staring at the boy speechlessly. Chekov grimaced and stood up from the table, slamming his hands down.
"I am not a child, Doctor!" he growled out, "I knew vhat I vas doing! I deed not do anysing to endanger eizer of us and you needed help! Vhat do I haff to do to prove to you zat I am not so weak as you sink I am?" McCoy stared for a moment and then shook his head, standing as well and raising his hands before him in almost a sign of surrender.
"That's not what I meant," he said, "I just…. I'm not used to the thought of…" He bit his lip, halting again, drawing a moan of annoyance from the Russian.
"Not used to vhat!" he demanded. McCoy nearly dropped his head, feeling so inadequate.
"I'm not used to the flashbacks I've been getting," he said, "not used to the feeling that I keep doing something to you that I shouldn't just by thinking the way that I do." He turned his back on the ensign so it would be easier to say what he was saying. "I feel like I'm doing something wrong by thinking the way I do about you and I can't tell if this is a result of that damn drug or if this is actually me. If it is the drug then it's just not fair, and if it isn't, I don't know how to react to it." He paused to take a breath and realized that there wasn't a single sound coming from the boy behind him. The look on the navigator's face when he turned made him pause longer. "What?" The boy was staring at him in disbelief.
"Vhat are you trying to say to me, doctor?" he asked, "vhat haff you been sinking about me seence eet vas een your seestem?" McCoy shook his head.
"I've been having flashbacks," he said, "they've been putting images of you in my head… You helping me… and I can't seem to get rid of them. They're not bad mind you… I'm just used to having thoughts like these about women. Ensign-"
"Pavel," the younger man corrected, "you said ziss vas not vork related. Call me Pavel." McCoy took a deep breath.
"Pavel…" something about the name on his lips sounded far too personal for some odd reason. "The way I've been thinking about you… makes me want you…" The boy didn't move, frozen to the spot as though he was nailed there.
"But you aren't sure about eet…" he said, questioningly. He walked forward, standing only a few scant inches from the taller man. "Deed you ewer… sink to try eet out before you turned eet down?" McCoy stared. The automatic response was to argue why he shouldn't.
"Pav-" Before he could get out more than that, the Navigator's mouth was on his, the shorter male standing on his toes to reach up to the right height. To McCoy it was like having a dam break open to reveal days and hours of a need he'd been denying himself, especially after that damn fruit concoction. His arms wrapped around The slim waist, dragging him closer and deepening the kiss. The ensign's hands grabbed at his shoulders in surprise, but he didn't pull away. Pavel returned the kiss with the same ferocity with which it was given, breathing a bit harshly through his nose.
McCoy wanted to be gentle, he really did. But his body wasn't letting him. He fought to regain control of it even as he turned the boy to press back against the wall, holding him against it and delving his hands into that soft, curly hair. His heart pounded against his ribs, sending adrenaline into his limbs and brain. It was almost like being on that damn drug again, but this time he knew exactly what he was doing. He might have not been able to stop it, but he knew he would remember this later.
Pavel reveled in the feeling of being pressed between the doctor's firm body and the wall, writhing with pleasure. Breathing hard, he let his fingers run down the other man's chest, dragging across his shirt to feel the living drum beneath. The doctor sucked in a breath of air, pulling away for only a moment. The ensign took that moment to bury his face against the man's neck, an unseen scruff scratching lightly across his cheek as he nibbled the heat of the other's neck, sucking on the spot where the man's pulse jumped, drawing out a small moan. The doctor found his way to one soft earlobe, kissing lightly and then nibbling down to the shoulder before the navigator's shirt got in the way. He cursed softly, leaning forward a bit more, knee sliding between Pavel's legs. The boy arched slightly with a tiny gasp as the doctor's thigh slid through the meeting of his thighs and he gripped the man's back like it was his only lifeline.
"D-doctor…" he gasped out.
"Leonard," McCoy corrected gruffly, still intent on searching out the softest skin he could possibly find on the smaller body. Pavel's eyes fluttered shut and he couldn't keep the smile from his face.
"Leonard," he returned, "ve… ze bed… I can't stand much longer…" The man pulled his face away for a breath, searching the boy's eyes for a moment. Then he nodded and lifted the boy from the floor, carrying him to the bed.
-End of Chapter-
Note from Author:
I'm thinking about letting it end here, because I really don't have any true continuation for this story. But I want to know what you guys think. I have another chapter, but I can't post it here due to the site rules. I can only post what would happen socially, rather than romantically. If you want to read the chapter that I cannot post on this site, it will by posted by Tuesday, July 13th at the latest on a site called y!gallery. If you want another chapter here, please review and let me know what you think. I'll PM you my screen name if you're interested in reading. Thanks for your time and I hope you enjoyed!
