Characters belong to Shonda
Arizona's POV
One day later…
"So, you're basically saying this is the side effect of the brain swelling she suffered from after the fall?" I ask Amelia as we stand next to Eliza's bed discussing her case.
"Exactly. The good news is that this side effect might diminish as the swelling decreases gradually" Amelia tries to reassure us.
"And if it doesn't?" Eliza asks her voice lacking any emotion. Since the minute Eliza opened her eyes to darkness, she seems so drained. My heart is breaking for her and I feel suffocated all the time, but I must stay strong for her. She risked her life and lost her sight because of me and the least I can do is hold myself together for her.
"Look Eliza" Amelia starts softly and I appreciate how supportive she's been since we admitted Eliza to the ER. She's probably one of the only people who didn't judge Eliza and her job since day one and I'm grateful for that. "You're a doctor too" and Eliza scoffs at her comment clearly losing hope of ever working again.
Amelia clears her throat and continues "I won't lie to you, it could take time. Maybe weeks, months, or years" I close my eyes desperately trying to breathe the despair I'm feeling. The thought of never being able to look at those beautiful green orbs and seeing them staring back t at me knocks the air out of my lungs. "But we can't be sure" Amelia continues. "You might wake up tomorrow with everything back to normal, so I need you to rest for now. Your brain needs to heal, and I want you to keep your hopes up. Giving in will only make your case worse."
Eliza barely nods her head at her and turns her body her back now facing us. She's emotionally and physically exhausted and I can't blame her. I can't imagine how hard it must be for someone to lose sight. God, she doesn't deserve this…
Walking next to Amelia as she turns to exit the room, she squeezes my shoulder and gives me a sad smile. "It must be hard for someone so successful to go through this. Stay next to her Arizona, she'll need you every step of the way".
"Thank you, Amy" I say almost in a whisper too scared to speak louder and reveal the pain I'm feeling through my voice.
I take a deep breath and turn to look at Eliza, seeing her laying on her back, her hands covering her face as sobs wrack her body. I can't hold back my emotions anymore, so I rush towards her tears already falling down my cheeks, and I climb next to her, pulling her tightly into my chest.
We both cry for what feels like hours until Eliza starts shaking her head that is still buried into my chest, my arms hugging her body. "It wasn't supposed to be like this" she cries her voice hoarse from all the emotions running through her. "I was supposed to get you back, get my job back, and now I lost it all, I lost my life…" her sobs reaching my bones, I pull back a little and place my hand on her cheek.
"Hey listen to me. I'm here, I'm not going anywhere do you hear me?" I ask my own voice betraying me.
"You say that now Arizona, but I don't need your pity. You can leave now, it's your chance to get out of this. I'm not going to be a burden on you".
"Eliza Minnick!" I gasp incredulously "I'm going to say this once, and you'd better not make me say it again" she relaxes a little, her eyes blankly staring as she waits for me to say what I need to.
"I'm alive because of you. My daughter is breathing right now because you were crazy enough to jump in front of an uncontrolled car to protect us. If you think I'd leave you because you can't see I will kick your ass" I say my tone full of determination.
I sigh and place a kiss at the top of her head. "This is all because of me…" my body shakes as tears keep falling. "If you hadn't met me none of this would've happened" and there it is. The guilt I've been feeling since the day Eliza risked her life for us spills out of me.
"Arizona, stop right now" Eliza raises her hand searching for my face, I guide it to rest on my cheek and lean into her soft touch placing a long kiss on her palm. "I know how depressed I look right now, and yes this is killing me. But I need you to trust me when I say that I do not regret pushing you out of that car's way at all. I haven't for a second and I never will even if it means I could stay blind forever" I shake my head trying to protest but she cuts in not giving me the chance to speak up. "No, you have to listen to me. I would do it again if I had to, do you understand? I'd rather be blind than risk Sofia's or her mom's safety".
Using my thumb to wipe the tears that have gathered at her jawline, she leans in struggling to reach my lips as her eyes move in different directions desperately trying to look for mine. I grab the back of her neck and guide her towards my lips, pressing hers against them in a passionate kiss that makes us forget the world for a minute.
Pulling back, she rests her face in the crook of my neck and asks in a whisper "Are you sure you want this Arizona? I don't want to get in the way of your life or Sofia's. What would you want with a blind woman?" her insecurities coming into play.
"Eliza" I move down so my face is at the same level as hers. "I need to tell you something I've been keeping from you…" she freezes in my arms. "I need you to know that I lo-"
"No! don't you dare!" cut off by her finger pressing against my lips, I furrow my brows confusion written all over my face. I mean she loves me, why doesn't she want me to love her back?
"You know I can't see but I can imagine how confused you look right now" she gives a sad smile as I'm still trying to process what just happened. "I was living and breathing for the day when you say you love me Arizona, but I wanted to look into your beautiful blue eyes while you do so. If you do right now I won't have anything to look forward to. I would stop fighting to get my eyesight back and look you in the eyes when you say it to me."
My features softening at her confession, I nod my head and place a soft peck on her lips. "I need to stay strong Arizona, and to do that I need to look forward to something. I need hope, and looking into your eyes while you say the words I've been craving is my only hope right now…"
"You know Sofia is waiting for you back home?" I tell her trying to lift her spirit.
"She is?" a smile I haven't seen since she woke up lights up her face.
"She is baby, she'll be there tomorrow when we leave here" I tell her how worried Sofia was about her.
She sighs looking calmer than before "Thank you Arizona…"
"I'm the one who should thank you Eliza. I know you're going to be fine, and you'll start seeing again before you know it" I hug her tightly s she starts drifting to sleep. "Until then, you'll see the world through my eyes…"
Another chapter for you guys! I try to write as much as possible when I have some time to spare. Hope you like this one. Let me know what you think, Thank you!
