Lorelai grabs her jacket, and her reading glasses. She takes the envelope her mother has given her, and retreats to the porch swing. She ignores the brisk air, as she removes the items from inside the envelope. She finds herself staring at what she assumes to be a senior picture, of the young man she saw in the coffee shop. Her heart skips a beat. She studies his face. He has her eyes, and her lips. He even has her smile. He has a strong jawline, and thick hair. She removes the paperclip that binds the pages together. She reads the private investigator's report thoroughly. Nathaniel Joel Lawson, is revealed to be his name. Part way through the information she stops abruptly, and pulls her phone out of her jacket pocket. Her mother answers on the second ring.
"Hello?"
"Mom, why didn't you tell me?"
"Tell you what?"
"That his parents died in a car accident, recently? I just stumbled on the newspaper article."
"I didn't want to pressure you into making a decision."
"Really?! You sent me to the coffee shop where he hangs out."
"I didn't know whether he would show up, or not. He is on winter break, but that doesn't mean…"
Lorelai cuts her off, "Cut the bullshit. That was wrong of you. If you want to meet him you can. Don't corner me into making a decision based on your own selfish desires."
"I am sorry. I just wanted you to see him. I thought it would be good for you."
"Good for me? It has created complete and total chaos in my life. Not only did I see him, but he saw me. I wasn't prepared to interact with him. I…" she begins to rant.
"Stop!" Emily insists, "You are driving yourself crazy. I know you. I know that you hate not having closure. You have seen him, what more do you need?"
She huffs, "Now I know that my kid is out there in the world without any parents to guide him, or support him. You don't get to make this decision for me."
"Lorelai, I know that. Meet him, or don't, it is up to you. I can't even imagine how difficult this is for you."
"No you can't! Why did you do this?"
"How long have you driven yourself mad about whether or not he is okay?"
"That is not the point!"
"Lorelai, I don't know what you want me to say. I don't know what to say about any of this."
"Bye," she abruptly hangs up the phone. The tears race down her cheeks.
July 4th, 1997—
She sits in a chair near her parent's pool. She watches as Rory frolics in the pool. Her mother takes a seat beside her, grimacing at her attire. She wears a loose fitting sundress with sunflowers on it. Emily hands Lorelai a drink. She wants to raid the bar, but she can't. She places the drink on the stand between them.
"Dinner will be done soon."
"Okay."
"Are you feeling alright?"
"Fine, why?"
"You've barely said two words all evening."
"I'm fine."
"Have you put on some weight?"
"Excuse me?!"
"Your face just looks chunkier than usual."
"It is probably just the light," Lorelai suggests.
"I guess," she nods, as she relaxes in her chair.
Lorelai avoids eye contact as her mother scrutinizes her every movement. She focuses on Rory, instead of turning to her mother, and snapping at her.
Emily watches her daughter, as she leans back in the chair. A thought crosses her mind, but she quickly dismisses it.
The following day Lorelai finds herself being drawn to the coffee shop once again. She sits in the same booth as the previous day. She waits for the raucous group of boys to come in. At five after ten she has nearly given up hope. She finishes the last sip of her second cup of coffee, when the bell above the door rings. The bright eyed young man enters the room. He dumps his jacket at the booth in front of her, and proceeds to the register. He grabs a cup of coffee, and a bagel, and returns to his seat. She watches the back of his head for ten minutes. She loses her nerve, and collects her belongings. She walks past him on her way to the door.
"Excuse me?" He begins. She groans inwardly, and turns towards him.
"Huh?"
"Are you new around here?"
"No," she shakes her head.
"It's just that I have never seen you here before, and now I've seen you twice in two days."
"I just came for the coffee."
He furrows his brow, "It is mediocre at best."
"If it is mediocre what brings you here?"
"It is close to my apartment. There certainly isn't anywhere better in the area."
"Fair enough," she turns to go.
"Wait."
She pivots in his direction once more. "Yeah?"
"Nothing, never mind."
"Seriously, what?"
"Yesterday I came in with my buddies."
"I noticed."
"Some of them made the observation that…" he trails off.
She grins, "I look like the female version of you?"
"Yeah," he confirms.
She takes a seat across the table from him. She extends her hand. "Nathaniel, I am Lorelai."
He doesn't immediately place his hand in hers. "No one calls me Nathaniel."
"I am sorry," she apologizes, with her hand still extended, "Nate."
"Nice to meet you," he suddenly feels nervous.
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure," he nods.
"Why are you eating a bagel?"
"She said that some lady got the last muffin. I guess if you snooze, you lose."
"I guess I should confess that I am some lady."
"You took the last blueberry muffin? That is a serious offense."
"What if I give you cash for a replacement muffin, which you can enjoy tomorrow morning?"
"Will you be here?"
"No," she admits.
"Yesterday when I came in I got the feeling that you were looking for someone."
"I was," she admits.
"Was it me?"
The question hits her like a ton of bricks.
