New Chapter! But first I have to thank all of my reviewers, but especially Rabid Reject who, if I'm not mistaken, has reviewed probably every chapter I've written. Thank you!
Nothing could rival the joy Cordelia felt as soon as she woke up. When Wes and Angel finished the spell she had immediately woken and looked to her hand. Nothing. The mark was gone. The visions were under control once more. That alone caused her so much relief she barely noticed a hand was resting on hers. She immediately recognized who it had to be. She felt like crying with happiness. She wrapped her arms around him and embraced Doyle in a hug.
Breaking apart after and uncomfortably long time for the other men quietly waiting in the room she looked to the man. He was smiling but at the same time his eyes were filled with some emotion she couldn't quite place. She had never seen him look like this. His brow was etched in a concerned look for her well-being. She knew that much and couldn't help but return the smile.
"You're back," she said in a low whisper.
"You too, princess." He said back, with no higher a voice than she had offered.
"I think we should get out of here," Angel broke in, interrupting the silence that had fallen over them.
Before he had done so Cordy had locked eyes with Doyle. There was something...different in them. She hadn't seen them for the longest time. The eyes that changed color almost with his mood. As he broke off the stare to look to Angel she shrugged off this slight change. Maybe it was all inside her head.
"I think that's best. Once we return to...where do we go, exactly?" Wesley asked.
"What's going on?" Cordelia asked.
"They blew up my apartment." Angel said casually. He had been very casual about things like death and destruction lately. It was driving her nuts.
"What?!" She asked, shocked.
"They were trying to take out the whole team, distract from some ceremony they were planning tonight." Wes explained, "Which, by the look of it they managed to perform by the way."
"We'll concern ourselves with that when we come to it. For now we need to get Cordy home and find a new place to-"
"Why not just run Angel Investigations from my place?" She asked suddenly, surprising even herself into silence, "Temporarily of course. At least until you can find a new place. I mean, Doyle's been staying with me and I'm pretty sure Wes had just been living in a motel or something..." Her solution made sense. at least with Angel. The other two men seemed to be shocked (Doyle) that he was staying with her and offended (Wes) that she thought he was living in a motel somewhere.
They began to move, signing Cordelia out of the hospital despite the wishes of the doctor. He seemed to think her mental state was not healthy enough to move. She thought briefly about what the visions might be doing to her considering what her tests showed, but knew there was no way she was going to stay in the hospital another minute. As they continued their way out something was bothering Doyle. He seemed even more restless in the wheelchair than he had all day.
"What do we do then?" He asked to no one in particular.
"About what?" Angel
"About the visions, I want them back."
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She wanted to keep them. Cordelia couldn't even explain it herself but when Doyle raised the issue she suddenly became very defensive. She was frustrated with herself and Doyle. The visions hurt, they came at the most inopportune times like in the middle of auditions, the left her emotionally drained, they even landed her in a hospital...and yet she didn't want to let them go.
Then there was Doyle. He would never admit it but at the moment he was in no condition to go through mind-splitting pain of any kind. He still hadn't regained the use of his legs, mostly because of the damage they suffered from the fall, his hand would occasionally tremor and he would refuse to sleep at times. She knew he wanted to take them away from her so she wouldn't feel any more pain, but what if seeing him in pain caused her pain? She was still confused about whether or not the two of them had a future, but she cared about the idiot nonetheless.
Cordelia had thought about bringing up her fears to the guys several times, but had so far chosen to keep quite. She knew that they would fall on deaf ears. Angel, Wes, and Doyle only seemed to be concerned about her well being, not so much their own. While she appreciated having them looking over her she couldn't help but think their help was misguided. Sure, that last bout of visions took some out of her, but was there anything wrong with her keeping them long enough at least to give Doyle some recovery time?
She was sitting quietly, passive aggressively ignoring all three men as they prepared for the spell that would transfer the visions. Willow had left instructions last time she had performed the spell on how to reverse it at a later point. Wes and Angel were pouring over the noted and ingredients when Doyle broke off unnoticed and approached her.
"Cordy, What's wrong?" He asked cautiously, she looked down to him, he was clearly concerned.
"Nothing, what makes-" She was cut off by the Irishman
"Oh, come off it! You've been poutin' all day." She sighed. She may have changed a but since the two had first met, but the man could read her like a book.
"I just don't think now is the best time to do this whole thing." She confessed.
"Why not?" He asked.
"Well, look at you Doyle!" He looked at her with mock surprise.
"I know I'm dashin' and all but that's no reason to stop the spell"
"That's not what I meant-"
"I know it's not. I know what yer thinkin" He started before sighing, " I want them back Cordy. They weren't meant fer you. You weren't ever supposed to feel that pain."
"But I did. What's so bad about letting you recover a little bit-"
"Because I wouldn't be able to bear seein' you with it." He burst out angry, "I can barely look at you now knowing you have." He replied barely above a whisper.
She saw it then, the flicker of whatever had changed in him since he woke up. It had nothing to do with post traumatic stress or whatever she had thought it might have been. He was feeling guilty. He was blaming himself for her having taken the visions.
"God, Doyle, you are such...an idiot." His shock was less fake this time.
"Excuse me fer carin' princess."
"I didn't mean it like that. I mean, if you honestly thought it's your fault I have the visions you're an idiot."
"Much better."
"I chose to have the visions. Me. All by myself. Willow could've given them to anyone and I took them despite Angel and Wes both telling me I shouldn't."
Silence fell between the two, allowing both to process the information for themselves. It also allowed them to begin to formulate questions about things. She began to wonder, why did he think it was his fault, did he think he was strong enough to deal with the visions now. Then, thinking further back another important question came up- what did he mean when he said, "if he was a braver person she'd know,"? With all the questions whizzing by in her head Cordelia began to worry if some similar questions where circulating his mind.
"Why did you insist on taking the visions?" He asked first.
"Why did you think it was your fault I had them?"
Both began to formulate answers for the first of many unanswered questions when Wesley broke it up. Amused by the look of annoyance that seemed permanently etched on Doyle's face when it came to all things Wesley she made eye contact with the man. She loved his eyes, they told her everything she needed to know about the man behind them. The look she was so worried about was still there, but so was the sparkle, that ebb of life she was accustom to. things would be fine eventually. Until then she led the way to the area Angel and Wes had prepared the spell for, trying to forget the fact that she had almost admitted she might care about Doyle out loud. There would be time for that later.
Now, I've been told by many a person that I'm a heartless asexual robotic bitch when it comes to emotions (I happen to agree and I'm pretty sure I started the nickname so don't feel bad) and this is kind of the first time I tried an emotional talk between two people...did it work? Let me know and review...
I should also mention that since this is a season finale rewritten I think it's a good place to give myself a little time before I post the next chapter. Not like my last leave of absence, it's mostly because I'll be starting my second semester of college Monday so I need a little time to adjust back to that schedule. I have the next few chapters written out, but I want to have a definite direction for season two's changes as well before I post them too. I probably will have the next chapter up in, like, a week instead of about three days like I have been posting them, so unless you absolutely can't wait a whole week to read the next chapter I'll put it up with enough motivation (cough-reviews-cough).
