Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns all public characters, and the world of Harry Potter. There is no intention to violate copyright.


Alternatives

Sunday, August 23, 1998

I awoke with the familiar sensation of parchment pressing against my nose and cheek. The sweet aroma of ancient knowledge and dusty texts surrounded me. Eventually I became more aware, and realized I had again fallen asleep while reading. I pushed myself from bed, and swiveled my legs over the edge without turning. The bond chose not to heal me through the night, and I needed no reminders of my discomfort. I briefly contemplated spending the day in my night-clothes to enjoy the solitude, but I knew the prat would not leave me be. His squeamish conscience would force him to check in. Perhaps, I needed to get away.

My decision came easily, as I contemplated spending the day under a tree reading from a text. The grounds of Hogwarts offered many places where I could go, and it would grant the solitude I desired. Hastily I readied myself, and called for a house elf. A little green creature with a frilly pink towel appeared by my table. She stared at me and said, "Good morning Professor Snape. Zincky make you big waffle with chocolate chips and whipped cream."

That sounded frightfully good, and I suggested, "Zincky, I would give that an 'E', for exceeds expectations. Adding chocolate sauce would earn an 'O' for outstanding." The little elf winked at me, and vanished. She would return in less than a minute, so I hastily cast the 'cushioning' spell on my chair. It allowed me to sit without too much discomfort.

The items seemed to appear on the table before she arrived, and then she said, "Zincky scared for Professor Snape and Harry Potter." My fork barley slid from my mouth, as I absorbed her statement.

Curiously, I glanced at her when she sat on the chair opposite from mine. My lips half curled at the sight, because house elves seldom took such liberties with wizards. She did not seem to volunteer anything further, so I calmly prodded, "What troubles you?"

The elderly elf sighed loudly, and folded her hands on the table's surface. She gazed at me and shook her head. In a tired voice she mentioned, "Zincky not happy. I afraid for Snape. Entity not look nice."

Dark eyes studied the elf, as I took another bite. Zincky glanced at her lap while I processed the given information. Curiously, I enquired, "The spell book harmed both of us, yet our bonds are dissimilar. Can you explain that?"

Zincky nodded her head as she said, "Zincky told Snape. It same spell. Bad wizard make spell. Wizards let bond kill elves. Powerful elf change elf bond. We punish selves."

Dare anyone call me a house elf. Her words confused me, as she made no mention of the Entity. How can this be the same spell? Despite the risk of sounding like a dunderheaded, I enquired, "The Entity forces us to obey its rules. If it does not bond with the elves, then what punishes you?"

Zincky patiently gazed at me, as if I were a slow learner. Suddenly my breakfast became much less interesting, as I did not wish to miss anything. Zincky calmly mentioned, "Bad wizard make spell. Dark wizard work with Entities to set rules. Bond enforces them. Spell has two parts. One make slave. One summons Entities. Entities rarely bond. Few believed they exist. Most thought Entities a myth."

After swallowing my food, I dared to enquire, "What is this Entity?"

Zincky glanced at me with concern-filled eyes, as she quietly said, "Zincky hoped Entity not come. Entities powerful wizards. They no longer human. They turn into energy. Entity changes your slave bond. It now channels magic. They channel magic through wizard pet. They not like elf magic. Entity never bond with elves."

That last mouthful was a bit more difficult to swallow, as I suddenly recalled the Entity referring to me as 'My pet.' Zincky continued speaking when I returned my gaze to her, "Entity like Snape." I scoffed, as the elf's definition was certainly different from my own.

Zincky's ears stood upright, and then thrust forward while she quietly glared. She would have made a tremendous teacher. I sat straighter, and nodded for her to continue. Patiently she stated, "Entity miss humans. Entity gets to live through you. Zincky not understand. Zincky not know how."

Cautiously, I leaned forward and rested my elbow on the table as I gazed at the little elf. The cushioning spell worked wonders. I momentarily considered casting it on the inside of my trousers, but it would cause them to billow. Curiously, I enquired of the elf, "What do you fear?"

Zincky's gaze fell to her lap, as she rubbed her arm nervously, "Zincky watch Entity beat Professor Snape." She received a nod in acknowledgement, and then she continued, "Snape is stubborn. Snape want to break bond. Snape research potions. Snape not tell Potter. Snape get Entity mad." Her anxiety increased further as she hesitantly mentioned, "Zincky scared, want to tell Potter."

Merlin, I did not need that. I spoke with authority as I stated, "Zincky, I assure you that my research will not offend the Entity. There is no reason for Potter to know, unless I was to act on it. At that point, it is within his right." Would this elf accept that? It was not worth the risk, so I stared her in the eye and tried to read her mind.

Zincky waved her hand at me and accusingly stated, "Your mind tricks not work on elves. Professor Snape, Zincky not want you hurt. Zincky afraid of Entity. Zincky see dark magic potion book on Snape's bed. Snape want to change squib potion." The elf had a good point, and I should move that book to the secret lab.

Dark eyes glared at the elf as I stated, "Zincky, I do not appreciate your spying on me. The Squib potion separates magical energy from a person, and if modified it could actually remove the bond without affecting our magical ability. Zincky, it is exactly what we need. Potter is squeamish, but he will agree once I make the potion."

Zincky jumped into a standing position, and waved her arms at me in frustration as she stood on the chair, "Making potion is acting!" She folded scrawny little arms over her chest and shook her head in frustration. "Professor Snape, house elves not tattle on wizards." The elf received a knowing nod of my head, but her squeaky voice cut into my thoughts as she pointedly stated, "We follow elf laws and magic. We not follow wizard ministry. What is Professor Snape?"

My eyes narrowed at the elf, as her point became very clear. "I suppose, elves no longer treat me as a wizard?" The elf nodded her head in agreement. My eyes slowly closed as I thought of my alternatives. Calmly I stated, "Zincky, I concede defeat. I will no longer study the potion without Potter's consent."

Zincky twitched her ears, as she firmly stated, "No potions. No spells."

This elf would make Slytherin proud. I offered her a nod of my head, as I stated, "Fine. Perhaps, getting Potter's permission would not prove too difficult. I suppose I would forgo further bond research without it."

Zincky popped out, and then she returned with the dark magic book I was studying. She glanced at me and asked, "Zincky return it for Professor Snape?"

With a wave of my hand, I mentioned, "Fine. Conceivably, I could research ways to prevent elven espionage." Her ears thrust forward as the little elf glared at me, and then she disappeared with the book. The bond finally chose to heal me, and my pain vanished. How long would I have suffered if Zincky did not convince me to quit the research? What a terrifying thought. I bet she knew. Quietly I stated to the empty room, "Thank-you, Zincky."

"Professor Snape is Welcome."

I was unable to detect the elf, and curiously wondered if there was such a thing to keep them out. A knock at my door interrupted my thoughts. Potter usually did that to alert me of his arrival, and then he enters. My bond did not sense him, so I assumed it was another. Curiously, I opened the door, and stiffened as I noticed McGonagall. She had a concerned expression, and she studied me for a moment before asking, "Professor Snape, may I come in."

Why must this woman constantly hover? She already received my forgiveness over last year's treatment. I have no idea why she blames herself. How could I succeed against Voldemort if Dumbledore's closest friends still trusted me? Her anger helped convince Slytherin students of my loyalties for The Dark Lord. There was nothing for her to make up. Gruffly I motioned toward the now cleared off table, and stated, "If you insist."

McGonagall entered while I slowly closed the door. She was in the process of sitting when I turned toward the table, and to my horror, she sat on the chair with the cushioning charm. Her eyes widened somewhat, as the invisible cushion made the chair taller than she expected. The woman attempted to mask her surprise, but I was not concerned. I took the other seat with ease and thanked Zincky when she brought in the tea. McGonagall glanced at me and said, "Severus, I have concerns that we need to discuss before tomorrow." With a roll of my eyes I was about to retort when she interjected, "We received a howler at breakfast."

My eyes closed briefly, as I attempted to think of what I might have done to deserve such a thing. It did not take long, as I thought of Miss Parkinson. My irritation showed clearly in my voice as I questioned, "Dumbledore discussed my howlers in his office. Minerva, what game are you playing at, I wonder?"

McGonagall shook her head at me as she poured tea for us both, "Severus, that is not what I meant. Mr. Ron Weasley received the howler from Molly." My back stiffened, and I sat taller in my chair. She added six cubes of sugar to my tea, and continued to say, "Everything you tell me is in complete confidence. Severus, you know I will never repeat anything. Please, talk with me, because you cannot continue to do this on your own. The children must drive you insane." She received a nod of my head in response. Minerva studied me for a moment before she continued, "You once came to speak with me when Dumbledore frustrated you, and he refused to listen. Please, I ask you to talk with me again."

The door received my attention as I glanced at it warily. With a resigned sigh, I rose from my chair and mentioned, "Mr. Potter will soon enter." Minerva's brows rose curiously, but she said nothing. The expectant knock came, and the youth stepped in nearly immediately. We performed our bowing ritual, and then he moved for his wand. Cautiously, I stepped out-of-the-way and mentioned, "Master, Headmistress McGonagall came to visit." Thankfully, he opted not to draw it.

Potter stepped into the room and mentioned, "Severus, I wanted to see how you were." He received a firm nod of my head, and then he politely greeted, "Headmistress McGonagall, it is good to see you." She gave him a comparably empty greeting, and then his gaze returned to me. While drawing my attention to his wand he quietly enquired, "Would you rather do this somewhere private?"

"Indeed," I mentioned and motioned to my bedroom. McGonagall stared at us as I admitted, "This will take but a moment." It is highly improper for a male teacher to take a student into his bedroom, but none would accuse me of anything knowing Potter holds all the power. Thankfully, he seems to enjoy the company of women. He withdrew his wand, and cast diagnostic magic on me. Calmly I stated, "You will find me in excellent health, Master."

Potter smiled at me as he admitted, "It pleases me to see that. When did the bond heal you?" My glance moved to the door, and I wondered how much the woman could actually hear. I then told him of the time, but not the circumstances. Potter accepted my answer and we left the bedroom. He opened the door to my suite and then cheerfully enquired, "We are going to Hogsmeade this afternoon. Would you like to join us?"

My voice stayed calm as I suggested, "Perhaps, your friends would prefer a break from their potions professor." Fear of having offended the bond caused me to slightly tense. Potter would never notice, but I had little doubt about McGonagall's observational skills. I did not refuse the master. Fortunately, I received no aches or punitive tingling sensations.

Potter actually understood my meaning, and with a grin he admitted, "Hermione said I should ask, because Malfoy is joining us. Does that change your mind?" A slow shake of my head answered his question, and he smirked before adding, "I didn't think so. See you tomorrow at breakfast." We performed our departure ritual, and he left the suite. Within moments, I returned to my seat at the table, as if nothing had gone on.

McGonagall studied me curiously before asking, "Does that happen often?"

The bond would never accept my complaining about Potter, so I carefully worded my answer. Calmly I mentioned, "This time he came alone."

Minerva noisily inhaled as she heard my statement, and with a slow nod of her head she admitted, "Severus, I had no idea how the students meshed themselves into your life. Potter is well-intentioned, but I think he suspects everyone secretly wishes to surround themselves with friends. This cannot continue, as you are a very private man. Severus, I will speak with him."

My lips partially curled at the woman's offer. In a calm voice I stated, "You have my thanks, Minerva. Earlier you mentioned a howler. Perhaps, we should discuss that."

McGonagall delicately stirred her tea, and glanced at me for a moment before she started speaking. "Severus, Mr. Weasley angered Molly for spreading gossip about something he watched." My emotional mask nearly failed, as I desperately held on. My hands balled into fists. My lips pressed firmly together, and with a nod of my head, I motioned for her to continue.

She noticed my tension, and continued to speak as she explained, "Naturally, this concerned me, so I pulled him aside for a discussion." School had not started, and already it was the worst year of my career. She poured more tea into my cup and continued, "Molly overheard him talking to George on the Floo, and I suspect she had words for Mr. Potter. He did not receive a howler. However, I have a lot to discuss with him." She glanced at me and mentioned, "Severus, all members of the 'Potter Squad' acted very guilty when that howler arrived. Their reactions told me that something happened, and I would like to know what occurred at your team meeting. Nothing you say will enter the school records."

My gaze landed on the woman as I mentioned, "It was nothing more than expected. I suppose it was a typical day, really. Rude names, insults, a feline tail, a set of horns, fistfights and I turned a student into stone. Perhaps, it was inevitable. I gave everyone detentions, and deducted points. Minerva, I publicly punished Mr. Potter."

McGonagall stared at me as she fumbled for words. Finally having gotten over her shock, the woman asked, "You turned a student into stone." The nod of my head was the only response, and she admitted, "We will likely receive an owl. Do not concern yourself, as I will handle that when it comes in. Last night you seemed more angered than normal, and now I fully understand the reasoning." She absently stared at her fingers, as she nervously turned her ring. With a quiet voice she mentioned, "Severus, Molly sent me an owl. She never told me what Mr. Potter did, but she mentioned you could use a friend."

My eyes closed in dismay. Slowly I opened them and glanced at Minerva, before I looked away. My voice stayed calm as I mentioned, "Minerva, you are an astute old witch." I glanced at her and noticed she smiled innocently at my comment, so I continued, "Perhaps, you already pieced the facts into a logical conclusion."

Minerva approached the topic cautiously as she asked, "Severus, does this mean I have your permission to discuss it?" My nod answered her question, and she continued speaking softly, "Last night you showed anger and hostility." I rolled my eyes, and she smirked at me as she admitted, "It was more than normal. You also refused to take a seat after I offered a few times, and then you skipped dinner. You also missed breakfast, and I overheard the howler. That told me it was something the students would find amiss, and there are cushioning charms on your chairs. Merlin, I hope my guess is wrong. Did Potter beat you while the others watched?"

My gaze settled on the woman, while I slowly inhaled. Eventually I admitted as if it was nothing, "Indeed, Minerva, you are very astute." McGonagall's loud gasp caused me to pause in my statement, and when she calmed down I continued, "Minerva, Potter had me on timeout, but it outraged Malfoy. It is a mortifying punishment for an adult. The bond demanded something public. Potter sought my confirmation before he acted on Malfoy's suggestion. I suppose, it is inappropriate to see one's teacher paddled." Minerva stared at me in shock, and I did not know if that was from my attitude or the events. I no longer cared. Calmly I added, "Malfoy will work with Potter on proper chastisements. Minerva, it was my fault for punishing my Master. "

McGonagall spoke with shock clearly in her voice, "That explains your actions later in the office. Severus, how would you handle Potter doing that in class?" My emotionless mask held securely, as I grunted dismissively at her question. She stared at me with concern-filled eyes while she asked, "You no longer care, do you?" I shrugged again. Why should I? That only makes it worse. It is inevitable, and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Why bother trying. Just accept and move on. Minerva leaned on the table and softly mentioned, "Severus, how have I missed your pain? You are completely beaten, and there is no spark left. You suffered tremendously in the war, but you had a goal. There was hope. You were very upset in the office, and talked of having nothing to live for. I thought you resolved those issues." She paused and we sat in silence for a few minutes. My gaze never left the table when I heard her quietly ask, "Severus, do you want to die?"

My eyes closed as I leaned back in the chair and folded my hands on the surface of the table. Silkily I spoke, "Minerva, I cannot damage the Master's property." She refused to accept that answer, but as my eyes had closed, I only heard her dissatisfied huff. Quietly I added, "Does it even matter, I wonder? There is little point." Slowly I opened my eyes and gazed hard at the woman, "Mr. Potter enjoys his new toy, but every child soon outgrows them." I rose from the chair when I added, "Good day, Minerva. Please see yourself out."

The woman rose quickly, and spoke with the chilling voice of authority. "Severus Snape, retake your seat, or we continue this conversation at St. Mungo's." That threat had me turn abruptly toward the woman, and head back to my chair.

After seating myself, I turned my attention back to her and asked, "What do you mean by St. Mungo's? There is nothing wrong with me. Poppy can confirm the Entity fully heals my mind and body. Headmistress, you assume too much."

"You might be correct, Professor Snape." McGonagall admitted. She cast a patronus, but kept her gaze on me. The fireplace flared, and I knew to expect an internal Hogwarts floo. I missed having the Headmaster authority to allow floos anytime I wished. It did not surprise me when Madame Pomfrey stepped out. My gaze lowered to the floor as McGonagall explained her observations.

The women fawned over me for the next hour, and Poppy cast many spells. My angered responses failed to unnerve them. Why would they not leave? The threat of St. Mungo's hung over my head, so I offered my full cooperation. That conniving old witch learned some of Dumbledore's manipulation. Eventually, McGonagall permitted an off Hogwarts floo, and a woman I never met led me to my room. She had me lie on the bed while she cast a spell that I did not recognize. She explained that it would help with monitoring, but she never told me what she was watching. She offered me privacy, and cast 'Silencio' on us. The slave bond interested her, and I welcomed talking about something other than me. She finally left after a few hours, and Poppy soon followed.

McGonagall motioned to the table where soup and sandwiches were set out for two, and I joined her for lunch. My left brow rose, as I stared at her curiously. Eventually she broke the silence and mentioned, "Professor Snape, this has no effect on your employment with Hogwarts, but I am placing you on paid medical leave." Merlin, I closed my eyes and waited for the explosive tingling sensation, but nothing happened. Cautiously I opened them again, and Minerva asked, "Do we need Potter?"

Dark cold eyes glared at McGonagall as I sneered, "Minerva, you place entirely too much confidence in those who practice mental mysticism." I stood from the chair and firmly stated, "I am fine."

McGonagall calmly ignored my statement and shuffled parchments as she explained, "Professor Snape, as of this moment, I am relieving you of all duties at Hogwarts. Professor Slughorn agreed to substitute, until you are well enough to return. You may keep these quarters."

My hands balled into fists, and my jaw screamed in agony from the pressure used in clenching my teeth. Dark eyes glowered at the Headmistress as I admonished, "I suppose, leaving me with nothing is your idea of help? Perhaps, you should lock me in this room."

The irritating witch sorted a few more parchments, and handed them to me. Angrily I refused to look at them. In a calm voice McGonagall stated, "Severus, there is a reason I refused to look at you last year, and it is not what you think." My arms folded in challenge over my chest, as I continued to glower at her. "I felt personally betrayed by your actions, because I grew to think of you as my stubborn little brother." This statement stumped me into silence, but my glare did not soften.

She calmly continued, "It did not start that way. I thought you were the most disagreeable person I ever met. You were arrogant, proud, and obnoxious. You spread your anger everywhere, and then you started working with Dumbledore. You know he and I were very close, and he spoke of you often. Eventually, I saw through the anger and noticed the pain. Severus, you are the hardest man to approach, but you are worth the effort. You are a tremendous person, and someday I hope you realize that."

Dark eyes continued to glare at the woman as I spate, "How can you love a death eater? Minerva, do not kid yourself. Would you treat your brother, the way you treat me? Would you remove the only thing of value he has left?" My emotionless mask weakened badly, and I had to struggle to contain it. Why am I so feeble? My frustration only grew, as I felt tears pricking at my eyes. Merlin, give me strength! I hated teaching, but my work was the only thing I had. With Occlumency, I attempted to fortify myself, but it took more concentration than I had to give.

Minerva reached across the table and gently brushed the hair from my face. She stared at me while I silently struggled, and then she explained, "I was wrong to give up on you before, and I am never making that mistake again. Severus, I believe in you." She stood to her full height, and she mentioned with a glance at me, "I would have treated my younger brother the same way I have you, although I would have dealt more firmly with his disrespect." My lips curled slightly at that comment, and the woman smirked as she mentioned, "I always wanted to try that mouth scrubbing charm. Molly claims the foamy suds were often used at the Burrow." Perhaps, she forgot to use it on Ron.

The woman laughed as I rolled my eyes, and then she motioned to the parchments, "Severus, please take a look at those. They are the different projects that Hogwarts instructors are working on, and a number of them have requested help. Bill Weasley seeks someone knowledgeable in the dark arts, as he came across a number of Egyptian artifacts with charms he could not break. Archaic dark magic meshes with them, and it might interest you to help him."

My eyebrows rose curiously, as I immediately shuffled the parchments to find the one from him. McGonagall watched as I read it, and I could see the interesting tangle that snagged him. A hidden curse reset all the others when any of them came off. Obviously, the next logical step is to have all of them removed at once. The incredible coordination made it a near impossibility, but if they succeeded, the object would explode. Quietly I mused, "Indeed, this is interesting. Professor Weasley can expect my owl." Perhaps, a spell could disable those protective functions.

Curiously, I browsed through the other parchments and discovered Professor Flitwick had an extensive list of charms he sought help with creating a potion or spell to counter the effects. That too seemed interesting. My mind immediately became absorbed, and I forgot about McGonagall. Suddenly I felt someone's hand on my shoulder. Cold eyes glared at the offending limb for daring to interrupt, and then Minerva spoke, "Severus, enjoy yourself. I will see myself out."