i can't believe this...i really can't but here it is...the last chapter of their tale...i am very grateful to everyone who patiently waited for this. domo arigatou gozaimasu!


【【【・:*:Wish・:*:】】】


Being busy with all the things from work, Yukina had lost count of the time when to visit the shrine to thank the gods for the blessings he got for the previous year.

So checking his schedule, he pushed open his laptop and started scanning the things he listed to be done. He was already getting engrossed when Onodera Ritsu slumped tiredly on his swivel chair.

The trashy looking table full of books and papers and manuscripts didn't help to ease the brunette's tense expression.

"Ah mou...The new year holidays just ended...but I feel like being pressured by the Valentine's events already!"

Yukina chuckled at his friend while typing some things. Onodera Ritsu would always say how busy he was, but he was never complaining about the work load he was getting. If anything, it was even as if the brunette was in a hurry to prove something.

"Ah, Yukina-san...have you visited the shrines already? My family went together and it was so crowded. Lots of people..."

"Not yet..." Yukina answered with a little frown. He brushed his fingers on his hair that has already grown longer and shut his laptop. "I have finished mostly what I am supposed to do for this week so I am planning to go tomorrow. It's Sunday right?"

"I see..." Onodera mumbled. "Well it will be a breeze then I guess...because the shrine wouldn't be as crowded as when we visited it!"

The talk about the shrines and anything related to the new years ended and all the Marukawa employees started working back on their daily routine. Specially the Emerald team which seemed to be always in a mayhem.

Takano's screaming at rejected manuscripts, the endless ringing of the phones, the continues tapping of shoes in all directions seemed to be never ending. To sum it all up, Yukina Kou was starting to feel restless.

He was starting to ask what he was living for. There was just so many strange things that has no answers. He didn't even know what questions to ask to begin with. And although working together with everyone, hanging around with them, joking and passing the deadlines and meeting new people, somehow, inside Yukina's mind, he didn't fit in.

Like he should be somewhere else.


Humming to himself while he fixed his coat over his broad shoulders, Yukina roamed his eyes around the cold flat. It wasn't cold because of the winter season. It was more like, despite the warmth the heaters were providing him, the atmosphere around the place was empty. And each passing day, it was becoming heavier and heavier it was suffocating.

However, optimistic by heart, Yukina tried to hide all the unnecessary feelings in the depths of his heart's recesses and just continued tidying the flat a bit before going out. He had left some of his clean, unfolded clothes on the sofa so he decided to carry them back into his room before going out.

"I guess I'll fold them when I come back..." Yukina muttered after closing the door.

With hurried steps to catch the train, Yukina started walking his way out of his apartment, only to find himself stopping on his tracks.

"Huh?"

There was something strange that caught his vision that he was rendered motionless for a while. With slow movements, the princely man turned his head towards the one painting hanging by the walls. For the millionth time, Yukina's deep-honey hues stared at the small painting. A black haired man wearing a white polo. The small, delicate back facing him. And the black hair that seemed to dance with the invisible breeze as the man gazed up at the Sakura tree in full bloom.

Still the faceless man on the picture but there was something so different. If it was someone else, anyone who would see something like that would have run like crazy out of that room. But Yukina instead took a step forward. Closer so he could check whether his eyes were just playing tricks on him.

"What...has this been like this the entire time?" Yukina asked aloud.

He raised his hand and using his index finger, started to trace the cold surface of the glass that was protecting the painting.

"But I am sure..." Yukina frowned. "Ne, you who are in the painting...shouldn't you be totally looking up the tree's petals?" Yukina asked, his breathing a little heavy. "Then why do you look as if you're about to turn towards me?"

The man's back was still all that Yukina could see, however, the head was tilted somehow as if the man in the painting was trying to take a peek at what was behind him. And what was making Yukina's chest constrict was though the black hair was hiding most of the man's profile, there was the obvious hint of a smiling lips on that face.

The throbbing in his chest started to soar up high as if he had ran forever. And he felt himself tremble for some reason. It wasn't fear. As creepy as it may seem to an outsider...what Yukina was feeling at that moment was yearning. So much yearning that it hurt.

"Why can a painting make me feel like this...I don't understand..." with a trembling cold hand, Yukina touched his forehead for a couple of seconds to calm himself. He could feel himself on the verge of tears welling from nowhere. How could one cry without knowing why?! However, when he looked back at the painting, the man in the picture was again same as before. He was back again looking at the tree like everything was just Yukina's crazy imagination.

A sudden, frustrated chuckle escaped Yukina's lips. "You're having fun making a fool of me are you?" Yukina muttered shaking his head with a smile, passing everything he saw as just a meer hallucination.

And without looking back at the painting, Yukina closed the door behind him with a soft click.


He could hear the crunching sounds under his boots as he trudged his way towards the Meiji Shrine. It rarely snows in Tokyo heavily so having this thick snow crunching beneath him was a little 'new'. It also made many children go outside to play slides and snow ball fights and snowman on the park.

His cheeks flushed from the cold, Yukina tucked his white, wool scarf round his neck that covered almost half of his face. Doing that, Yukina experienced less staring than he would have if he didn't do that. Covering up like that, to the women, Yukina was just any other tall guy out there. And the man was thankful for at least being sure he'd have the serenity he needed during his time in the Shrine.

"So cold today...where do these kids get the energy to play like there's nothing?" Yukina thought when he caught too young boys running around throwing each other snow balls at their faces.

He continued walking with his mind focused with nothing in particular. His gaze was just towards the majestic shrine that was being covered by pure white snow. It looked like the huge, historical Shrine was even glowing mysteriously. Like the heavens were pouring blessing over it.

When the tall man, shivering despite his heavy clothing stopped on his tracks, he was already before the Shrine with all of its glory. The figure that has seen over many relevant happenings in the country's history was there intact despite the many years it has gone through.

"See...Yukari-chan...this Shrine has been standing here for thousand of years ago. So you can be sure that your prayers will be kept and heard by the gods..." an old voice suddenly broke the silence Yukina was having.

When Yukina turned at his side where it was coming from, he saw this old woman with a slight hunchback together with her cute, granddaughter that looked no more than four.

"Really Obaa-chan? Thousands? Even before you were born? It's older than you?" the girl asked totally interested.

The old woman smiled and patted the girl on the head. "Yeah, older than me...and I am sure this will still be standing even after you have had grandchildren of your own."

Jumping up and down, the girl smiled a big toothless grin at Yukina which made Yukina smile in return.

"Nii-chan...did you also come here to make a wish?"

Yukina bended lower with his hands on his knees. "Wish? Haha-no...just here to say thank you."

"Eh?" the girl's eyes widened and looked at her grandmother standing by her side. "But Nii-san...you know when the first snow hits the Shrine, grandma told me that the spirits of the Shrine's guardians are celebrating and are playing around the trees, that they would grant anyone's wish...granted they are from the heart! Ne, grandma?"

Yukina cocked his head to the side. If wishing was his business then he'd go the the prayer and wishes wall, write them on the small peace of wood and hang his desires there.

The old woman laughed. "I did? Haha..right...that's true..." she looked troubled though.

The old woman signed for Yukina to come closer to her. After being close enough, on her toes, the old woman moved closer at Yukina's ears. "Just agree with her...I said those guardian things to stop her crying from a while ago..."

"Ah..." Yukina nodded in agreement and patted the girl on the head. "I'm sure whatever you wished for, they'd come true...you're such a good girl."

"That's why you should make your wish too!" the girl grinned. "Because my wish has been granted right away!"

The old woman and Yukina exchanged gazes.

"Eh, it's been granted already?" the old woman asked curious. "What did you wish for dear?"

The girl stepped up and held on to Yukina's hand. "I asked the guardians to let me see a prince. And there he came. Nii-san...you're a prince right?"

Laughing amused at the girl, Yukina kissed the girl's hand, riding along the girl's dream. Not knowing that in reality, if the past would be considered, he was indeed the last prince of the Yukina Clan. Of course, he wasn't aware of it anymore.

"So you make your wish too, okay? Like get a girlfriend or something!"

At the straightforwardness of the little girl, the grandmother bowed apologetically. "Sorry about that...we'll be going first. Thank you."

And as the two figures' distance grew from him, Yukina found himself thinking of when was the last time he ever made a wish. He seemed to be taking everything all around him as normal and what was supposed to happen that thinking about it, he didn't actually have anything he wanted. Except...feel whole again.


"You, Yukari-chan, you don't go around telling people to get a girlfriend...okay?" the old woman lectured as she dragged her grandchild towards a warmer place.

"Eh, Obaa-chan...still a prince needs his pair right?" Yukari-chan smiled, blushing not because of the cold.

"You really believe he's a prince?"

The girl nodded, exhaling a puff of warm breath before her. "I can't wait to tell the Obaa-chan in that huge house that I saw a prince once we come back to Okinawa!"

"The Sawara ancestral house? Yukari-chan, don't go troubling people there...it's bad..."

"No...Sawara Baa-chan is kind and always tells me stories. Her grandchild is a mangaka working here in Tokyo. I told her I want to be a mangaka too!"

Shaking her head in a sad smile, the old woman sighed. Her grandchild's drawing during art classes had been awful. Well, there would always be a room for improvement...but she doubt that Yukari's parents would allow the girl to go with an unstable job.

"Plus, you know...the Grandma in that house showed me pictures...and somehow...one of the guys there looked exactly like the Nii-san earlier. He's really a prince. I am sure...that's why my wish is granted. I am so happy!"


He drew a very deep breath and released the slowly out of his nose. Doing so made him feel relaxed. Like the tension in his chest and on his shoulder somehow eased.

After saying his thanks and bowing before the Shrine, Yukina started walking his way around. Just for the fun of it, he decided he'd walk around. Besides it's been a while since he had time for himself.

"Wish huh?"

He had been staring at the ground as he did his thinking when a sudden strong breeze enveloped him. His hair fluttering, his scarf flying to the direction the wind was going, the man raised his surprised face up at a lifeless tree. It was no doubt a Sakura Tree. Although it looked dead without its pretty petals that only blooms in Spring, Yukina was sure it was a Sakura Tree.

"Somehow resembled the one in the painting," he suddenly realized.

Smiling, Yukina looked around him. He realized that he'd been roaming far too off from the main park. It was only him and the cold wind touching his cheeks.

"If...if there are really guardians here..." Yukina mumbled, almost ashamed that he was actually doing what a little girl just said a while ago. "Please...show me what I am looking for..."

He had been feeling empty ever since the beginning. It felt like he was just tossed into something he wasn't even an original part of. Having the silence of the eerie wind coming in all directions made Yukina even realize how strong this 'sense of loss' was everytime he gazed at the painting back inside his flat.

Somehow he felt like the painting, no, it was more like the man in the painting, was such an important part of himself. But there was nothing he could remember about it. The sense of loss, the sense of being out of place, the feeling of missing someone he didn't know became a whirl of unexplained feelings close to what one would call unrequited love.

But that love was shapeless and directionless. Yukina didn't know where to direct that strong emotion. He was sure it has always been there. But there was no one to direct it to.

"Show me...what I am missing...please..."

Yukina closed his eyes shut, hoping for some enlightenment like how the movies portrayed everytime the lead characters experience revelations. However, when he opened his eyes, it was still the dead sakura tree and the cold breeze that was there. Nothing changed.

Yukina sighed at his stupidity and inserted his freezing hands inside his coat pockets. He sniffed surely not because of the cold and turned his back from the tree.

And that's when it happened.

The morning sun disappeared and the night crept in. At first he thought what was falling from the sky was snow. However, when he raised his hand to capture one of the falling piece, he realized it was a sakura petal. Pink, glowing in the darkness, and breathtakingly beautiful.

Abruptly the man turned back towards the dead tree behind him. His white scarf fell on the ground and his lips were in a silent gasp as he watched the dead tree just a while ago dead now beaming with sakura's in full bloom. The best he had ever seen.

As if in a trance, or in an unbelievable dream, Yukina whirled around. The empty space where endless scattered dead trees was present a while ago was replaced with a building that looked like the historical palaces he had seen from books and the news. He just didn't know that it was the same spot where the Yukina-clan's palace once stood.

"What's going on?" he whispered.

It was like watching a scene from a historical drama when a darkhaired man, dressed in glittering green robe appeared sitting on the floor of the open room of the palace that appeared out of nowhere.

In an instant, everything looked like he was in the backyard of some royalty's room.

"You..." Yukina stuttered, trying to take a closer look at the sad face looking down the sakura's on the ground. "You're the guy in the painting aren't you?!"

But the figure made no indications that he heard Yukina, even more, he looked like he was even oblivious to the man's presence.

"Hey? Can't you hear me?!" Yukina shouted.

Just when he was about to approach the delicate, looking man, another figure appeared. A tall man in gold robes with dragons engraved at the back of the man. His dark, blonde hair danced with the wind just like how Yukina's. The man in awe gulped. And he felt his arms getting creepy goosebumps when the man in gold robe turned to look at the sakura tree behind him.

"No way..." Yukina gasped. "It's me..."

Getting depressed even more, the shorter guy stood and walked under the huge Sakura tree which was in full bloom. It was a mystical view, as the petals dance with the wind and the full moon shining on them. "It's very sad..."

Smiling at his lover's childishness, the guy with Yukina's face went to where the man in green robes was standing and embraced him from behind. "...to die for my Clan is my duty ever since I was born. But I want to let you know something..."

"For you, I would have given up my life. Now together I guard it dear. I was prepared to die until I met you. Now that we are together, I wish to always be by your side.*1

"Since when did you start reading poems from Hyakunin Isshu?"*2

"Can someone pay attention to me? What on Earth..."

And as fast as the strange appearances of the dark haired guy and the guy that looked like him appeared, they dissolved in an instant. Only to be replaced by another...

The carriage was being pulled by two horses. Two directionless horses. The man with Yukina's face could see himself and the smaller man clinging to one another.

"Promise me you won't forget. Okay?" The guy with hair as black as the night sky in a silk Yukata whispered as he buried his face on Yukina-look alike's shoulders.

"I'm sorry for putting this kind of curse on both of us."

"No. I'd be happy to die over and over again if that would mean that we would be able to be together even for just a short span of time. The curse of revenge turned for the better when you torn the canvas...we are inseparable now. Forever."

"But to kill you...I can't bear it."

"I will be reborn anyway...that's fine. This is a chance given to us by the heavens...a never ending love."

The two looked before them. They held hands tightly as they watched their carriage nearing a cliff hearing the raging rivers below.

"This is the first death. Kou...see you soon..."

"Shouta...sorry. See you soon."

As the carriage crashed into the black river drowning and killing Kisa, Yukina disappeared, his spirit being locked up back into the canvas he was in.

Feeling his head about to explode, Yukina fell on his knees, his hand on his throbbing forehead. "What...Kou...it's me, isn't it? Shouta? Who's Shouta?"

And then as if the strange happenings wasn't enough, Yukina found himself on the roof top of his apartment at the break of dawn.

"Kisa...san..."

By the time Yukina remembered the real reason he was there, Kisa was almost gone.

"No...no...Damn it! No!"

"Live a normal life and die a normal death. I've been alive thousand times while you alone waited in that canvas. Not able to live a life. It must have been painful and sad. This time it's different."

The fire intensified.

"Whenever I want you, all I have to do is dream. And you'll be there. Good bye for real this time...Yukina."

The flames that devoured Kisa were as orange as the peeking sun. And when the sun was completely up, there was only the ashes of the canvas. Yukina tried to grab what was left of Kisa, his hand, but the man instead caught the wind.

"Kisa-san?! KISA-SAN?!"

Yukina turned around. His eyes circling the entire roof top. The wind blowing hard against him. Making him feel so cold, alone. He dashed at the fluttering white blankets, looking for his other half. But there was no one except him.

"KISA-SAN?!"

It was all too much of a shock that Yukina felt almost nothing. A devoid feeling. An emptiness wider than the heavens. He was numb, body and soul. And yet, there he was, his warm tears wetting the once again full of grass grounds. With the petals showering above his head, Yukina felt even more lost that enlightened.

After a year of living the life Kisa Shouta lived, Yukina Kou...finally remembered.

"It...it's all my fault...I...took over Kisa-san's existence..."

The silent tears flowing down his cheeks as he watched the pink petals fall on the ground hurt his eyes. He wanted to scream. He wanted to shout. But his mouth was so dry that when he wanted to cry out, there was nothing that came out.

It was more painful. The ache of not being able to cry out all the pain inside him was torture. For the silent sobs only intensified the longing and the pain that was there all this time.

At least if he could cry out, he could distract himself with his voice. But this silent cry only emphasized the grief inside. It made his pain more real, more painful...as if he could still hurt more than he was already feeling.

"How...could I forget...I am such a bastard..."

Like a lost child, unable to go back and unable to move on, Yukina began his voiceless cry.

"Kisa-san...I want to see you...I'm sorry...I should never have done all those things..."

The spots where Yukina's tears fell were so visible. And the sensations he was feeling everywhere felt more real than the reality waiting for him once this crazy ride ended.

"What I wish...what I really wish..."

He was pleading not just with his voice, but with every living cell in his body that whoever was showing him this would hear him. He had never believed of such omnimpotent presence but that moment, he felt like he couldn't do anything at all on his own, but leave it to the One who can.

The moment he was asked what his wish was before, he couldn't answer because of a big part of his very being has been removed forcefully from him. But when he regained all those memories, the painful, the hellish and the tormenting cycle of killing Kisa and being sealed in the canvas, he realized this one dream he had ever since the beginning. The dream he had even before the first betrayal was committed.

This dream that was never fullfilled because he let his heart be devoured by anger and hate.

With a mind full of all the things that happened from thousand years ago to the present, Yukina Kou had one wish.

"Please...Let me stay where Kisa-san is..." he whispered. It was only an indistinc sob to a bystander. But Yukina was repeating this over and over again.

"Let me be with the one that holds this...God..." pounding hard on his chest pertaining to his heart, Yukina cried harder, prayed fiercer and begged the longest he had ever done in his life.

Yukina had buried his face on his shaking palms. Wishing and wishing and wishing. He didn't care about the other sounds around him. He didn't care about the petals resting on his head. He didn't care about the sudden warm feeling in front of him.

"Yukina..."

It was crazy. Yukina was so familiar with that voice and yet, there he was afraid to look at the presence before him.

"Yuki..." the voice calmly called.

Shaking terribly, Yukina remained kneeling on the ground with his face on his hands. He was afraid that maybe after he gazed at that presence, the dream would end. Just like with any other kind of beautiful dream that leave people hanging.

"...!" Yukina gasped at the soft and warm hand that touched his. Slowly, carefully, whoever was there tugging his hands away from his face, it was being done lovingly.

"Yukina...it's me...look at me..."

The hands that were once was hiding his face were gone. However, Yukina won't raise his gaze. He was dead afraid. Dead scared. and most of all, dead shameful. He didn't know what face to show the one and only person he ever wanted to be with.

A soft sigh was what Yukina heard. The Yukina prince couldn't stop himself from shedding more tears he didn't care if it didn't look manyly at all. The hands that cupped his face were so warm and soft and soothing. Before Yukina knew it, the person before him had already moved his face so that they could look eye to eye.

The pair of dark grayish eyes, smiling and crying at the same time towards Yukina was the last straw that rendered him completely immobile.

There Yukina Kou, just stared with eyes still gleaming from tears towards the man in white long sleeves polo before him.

"Kisa...san..." Yukina whispered still unbelieving. "Shouta..."

The darkhaired man before him never looked as beautiful as this with the glowing sakura tree behind him. With the pink petals dancing and floating around him which only intensified the dark hair and the deep eyes of his beloved.

Kisa never said another word. Instead, the man had pulled Yukina into a hug. A scent so good wafted around Yukina as he found his face resting on Kisa-san's shoulders. The hands that were encircled around him were calming and gentle.

It was a feeling that Yukina had never had before. A sense of release filled him. And utter joy as he rested his tired body against the warmth before him.

Kisa kissed the top of Yukina's head whispering the words Yukina had been waiting for.

"Kou...welcome home..."


"Are you sure that Yukina Kou is not just on a vacation or something?" a police officer asked with one of his brows raised.

The other police officers were looking around the flat, checking something that could possibly be 'not right'.

"We are sure!" Onodera Ritsu replied obviously flustered. "He...he mentioned about going to the Shrine this last Sunday. And then he didn't come to work on Monday. Tuesday came and we still haven't heard anything from him. So today we filed a missing person report..."

Mino, and Hatori were looking around as well as if following the two other officers on blue. Takano on the other hand remained standing beside Ritsu, his hand at the back of the brunette for moral support.

"Okay...calm down...do you know any relative of Yukina-san we can call?"

"No...there's none!"

"Okay...a debt perhaps he's running away from?"

"Look," Takano started obviously getting pissed by now. "I am that guy's superior and I can testify that he's not that kind of man."

"Alright..." the officer sighed. "I didn't mean that as an offense."

Closing his notepad, the man tipped his hat and called out for his other colleagues. "Thank you for your cooperation. We'll inform you of the findings once we get any."

Onodera walked the officers towards the door and shut it carefully behind him.

"I don't believe this...Yukina would never disappear without informing us..." Mino-muttered, tracing his hand on to the cold sofa in the middle of Yukina's flat.

The officers was given the permission by the owner's building to tear the lock of the apartment since it was for emergency purposes. Onodera and the rest of the Emerald team was afraid Yukina might have slipped on the bathroom and hit his head and died from bleeding. But as what the officers saw, there was no sign of forced entry in the flat, and even if Yukina went out the country, they noticed that the documents needed were still there in his drawer. Everything seemed fine in that room.

So the question where Yukina Kou had gone to was a big mystery.

Onodera found himself staring at the painting they were talking about that new year's night. Heart beating wildly, he took hurried steps towards it and stood before the painting.

"What is this..."

Green eyes narrowing, with his chest constricting from nervousness and the air of strangeness, Ritsu continued staring.

The painting was as the same as before. The darkhaired man with his back facing the front, wearing a white polo still gazing up at the Sakura tree in full bloom. The only difference was he wasn't alone anymore.

Dark blonde and taller than the other, they were both looking up the tree hand in hand.

Ritsu almost felt faint. For the new guy in the painting was wearing a white scarf exactly the same with the scarf Ritsu gave Yukina on Christmas.

"Let's go home?" Hatori and Mino asked, starting to gather their belongings.

The two went out first and Takano and Ritsu was left alone in that cold flat.

"What's wrong?" Takano asked. "He'll be fine. He's the type of guy that will always be able to get out of trouble..."

Ritsu smiled faintly. He threw one last glance at the painting and started walking away. He slid his hand around Takano's arm and sighed.

"You worry too much, Ritsu..." Takano whispered, planting a light kiss on the brunette's head.

Ritsu's grip on Takano's arm grew tighter. "I just wish, that wherever Yukina is, he's being happy."

"He is happy. I am sure," Takano replied.


THE END


chapter end notes:

thank you for joining me in their ride. now that it's done...i realized that i really do love the erotica couple more than i thought.

*bows* another tale has ended. i really treat this as an accomplishment. because before when i was younger, i can't finish a story. i am really happy. thanks and more thanks..*sniff*

-shuusetsu