Chapter 12
The headache had become worse. Sighing Peter ran a hand over his forehead. Even if it had been four days ago that Lucius Malfoy had screamed at him how he could have been so foolish to let Sirius escape, he still heard his scornful voice. Where could Sirius have gone to?
Had he fled to Remus? Or maybe to Godric's Hollow? Suddenly Peter was wide-awake. He jumped up and left his house. Perhaps everything wasn't lost yet.
„Will Dad come back?"
Harry flinched as he heard Faith's voice, and her little warm hand sneaked in his. Swallowing, he looked down into her face. He put an arm around her slender shoulders and drew her close.
"We have to believe that he will return. We have to." he said and felt how he trembled. Why, why didn't the Order of the Phoenix do anything to help Sirius? Why couldn't Dumbledore think up a plan how to rescue Sirius out of Voldemort's power?
But there wasn't any indication concerning Sirius' whereabouts as Dumbledore had told him again just yesterday as Remus and Claire had taken Faith, Sara and him to Hogwarts. And Snape had said it would still take a while till they would have searched all possible hiding places. Harry, who had decided that he didn't like Snape, had been able to keep back a cutting remark only with much effort.
Even as they had been sent away once more while the Order was meeting and Remus had taken them to Hagrid, his mood remained gloomy. Hagrid, who served them biscuits hard as stone and just seemed to be happy to finally get to know him, was so effusive and nice that you just had to like him, but the fear for Sirius caused everything else to appear insignificant for Harry.
Harry sighed, looked to the narrow silhouette of the moon and tried to suppress the helpless fury which filled him for days. There just had to be something they could do. There had to be some way! But what should he do? What should he achieve against Voldemort and his followers, if not even Dumbledore could do something? He was a child, he was ten years old and even if the whole magical world believed that, he had certainly not defeated Voldemort then. His mother had defeated the Dark Lord for short time and had paid with her life for it.
"I want to Dad." Faith whispered and nestled into his arms.
Once more Harry felt how feelings of guilt overcame him. He forced himself to recall the words which Sara had told to him. No, he said to himself. It wasn't his fault. It was entirely Voldemort who was responsible and bore the blame, not he.
Harry tightened his hold on Faith's hand and walked through the garden with her, towards the stony bench, which stood beneath the old oak. They sat and Harry took his sister into his arms.
"I also want Sirius to come back, Faith." he murmured and heard how his voice shook.
Silently they held each other. Finally Harry said,
"Come, Faith. It's slowly getting cold. We should return to the house." and stood up.
"You do not want to go already, do you? Now, as I've finally found you."
Harry spun around and froze. In front of him, only a few metres away, Voldemort stood, surrounded by some of his followers. There was no doubt that it was the Dark Lord. Red, snake-like eyes stared at him out of a white face.
"Did my sight leave you speechless?"
The cold, mocking voice and the laughter of the Death Eaters let Harry forget his fear. And while he clutched with one hand Faith's and with the other his wand, he glared at the wizard who had killed his parents.
"Where is Sirius? Where do you keep him imprisoned?"
"Sirius? Sirius Black?"
Harry, however, didn't answer. Had it been really surprise that had flared up in those red eyes for the fraction of a moment? Whatever Voldemort might have expected that he asked such a question he surely hadn't. Hope blazed up in him. Was Sirius perhaps not kept prisoner? Had he escaped that traitor of Pettigrew?
"Yes, Sirius Black stays in my dungeons. He's still alive, but not for long anymore. Don't you want to see your godfather again?"
Harry heard the amusement in the cold voice and realized that Voldemort was playing around with him. He swallowed and the hope which had seized him, vanished immediately as he suddenly grasped that Faith and he were in deadly danger. The fear threatened to overwhelm him. What should he do? Voldemort would kill them both. And that mustn't happen. That he would never forgive himself. Oh, why had he only insisted upon going in the garden? And why had Faith only followed him?
Talk, he had to talk. Perhaps Sara would miss them. If he managed to put Voldemort off, then perhaps something would occur to him. He opened his mouth, but no sound wanted to escape him. What cut through his fear, which paralyzed him, was a loud bark, a threatening growl. In the next instant Harry saw a huge dog racing towards Voldemort and his followers.
And then hell broke out. Sirius transformed and screamed,
"Harry, Faith, run!"
While Sirius attacked the Dark Lord and his followers, Voldemort shouted,
"Bring me the boy!" and raised his wand.
Harry, who was still holding Faith's hand, threw himself instinctively to the ground and pulled Faith with him. Like coming out of a thick fog, he heard Sara's, Remus' and Claire's voices which called their names. Harry, however, resisted the urge to turn around and let go of Faith's hand.
"Run to the bushes, Faith and hide! Go!" he hissed and jumped up.
Not a moment too soon. Only with effort he managed to avoid the curses. Voldemort and two of his followers had come frightening close. Harry knew that he had to defend himself. He had no choice. And then he didn't think anything anymore. He fought for his life. Some spell broke through his magical shield and the power of the curse caused him to fall on the knees. Dizzy he tried to get on his feet again. But to his greatest surprise no further curse hit him. Harry looked up and struggled to his feet. His opponent fought with Dumbledore. How the leader of the Order of the Phoenix had come here, Harry didn't know, but he hadn't the strength to think about that.
Frantically he looked around and what he saw caused him to freeze. Voldemort held Faith.
„Potter, if you do not want that something happens to her, come here and throw your wand away."
Faith screamed and tried to break loose, but Voldemort's grip was too strong for her. Harry lowered his wand and walked towards them.
"Drop you wand, Potter!"
Harry gazed into Faith's white face and let go of his wand. The following events Harry would never clearly remember later. Only the fear and the hate remained crystal-clear in his memory. As Harry did what the Dark Lord had demanded, a smile slid across Voldemort's gaunt face. Then he waved his hand and Faith fell screaming to the ground. Before Harry could react, Voldemort had seized his arm.
"A second time you won't escape me." he hissed.
Harry fought with all his might. Faith, he had to get to Faith! Suddenly something crashed into them and Voldemort's grasp loosened. Harry broke loose and flung himself next to Faith. While Sara threw herself at Voldemort and trashed away at him maniacally, Harry broke Voldemort's curse. Faith's screams stopped, but she didn't stir, lay motionless in his arms.
"Sara, Faith!"
Sirius' scream caused him to look up. Sara slowly sank to the ground and Harry jumped up. White-hot rage and hate swept him away. For a moment his gaze met with Sirius'.
"Help me, Sirius!" he screamed and raised his hand.
But his hissing wasn't the only one. Remus and Claire who suddenly had appeared next to him, had used the ancient curse as well. Their silver rays crossed and the glaring light hit Voldemort with full force. From Sirius's wand shoot a blinding green light. And Sirius as well didn't miss the Dark Lord. Harry saw how the light engulfed Voldemort. It was the last thing he saw before darkness surrounded him.
Cautiously Sirius ran a hand over Harry's forehead. Still Harry was glowing with fever and Sirius sighed. Harry would survive, but it had been narrow. The curse had cost him much strength and on top of that he had performed magic without a wand. Something Sirius still didn't know how Harry had managed that.
Shaking his head, Sirius pulled the blanket tighter around Harry. Never again he wanted to suffer such fear. As he had thought that he had lost Sara and Faith, something in him had broken. That he had indeed used the Killing Curse, for the first time in his life, he still couldn't believe. Even in his times as an Auror he had never used this curse. But perhaps the fact frightened him more that it absolutely didn't bother him. He didn't regret it. To protect his family, he would have done everything.
He thought of the hate, the cold fury he had seen in Harry's eyes as Harry had asked for his help. Almost black his eyes had been and Sirius hadn't been able to suppress a shudder. That a child should feel such hate was just not right.
Suddenly he sensed two tender arms surrounding him. He leaned against Sara and closed his eyes.
"Do you know what I ask myself? If it would have ever come so far, hadn't I escaped then?"
"Oh, Sirius. You aren't to blame for everything that happened, no more than Harry. Do finally stop to reproach yourself. Don't you think it is time at last to forgive yourself?"
"Perhaps you are right." Sirius said quietly, opened his eyes and turned around. With one hand he caressed Sara's cheek, bent forward and kissed her. As he finally broke apart, it took a while for him to get his breath back.
"I hadn't thought that I would ever see you again." he said hoarsely and thought of those moments he had kneeled next to his family, beside Sara and the children, who had lain lifeless in front of him. Only as he had gradually became aware that all three were breathing, he had jumped up, and had frantically screamed for a healer.
That the remaining followers of Voldemort surrendered after the fall oft their master, he didn't notice. Only as Sara and the children had been brought to Hogwarts and were taken care of, he had realized that no-one had arrested him. And there, beside Harry's bed, he had faced Remus, who had looked at Harry with worried expression. But in the first hours and the following night they had hardly talked with each other as they had kept watch. Sara had regained consciousness the next day. She had recovered fast. The condition of the children, however, had been critical for a long time, so that they had returned to Godric's Hollow only two days ago.
A gentle touch jolted him out of his thoughts. He looked up. Sara smiled and her voice was light. But in her eyes was something that hadn't been there before.
"Didn't I tell you once that you won't get rid of me so easily?"
Wordlessly Sirius pressed Sara close to himself. How much he loved Sara. As Sara writhed out of his arms, she said,
"Come to the terrace. Let Harry sleep. Bigi will look after him."
He nodded.
"Yes, I'll come immediately."
Sara gave him yet a short kiss and left.
For a while Sirius still sat at Harry's bed and regarded his godson. Finally he stood up and bent over him. Something just had occurred to him. Faced with sheer worry he had purely and simply forgotten which day today was.
"Happy birthday, Harry." Sirius quietly said and kissed Harry on the forehead. Sadly he looked at Harry's motionless, sleeping figure.
He straightened up, turned around and stopped dead in his tracks. In the open door Remus stood and gazed at him silently. Sirius sighed soundlessly. He knew that he owed his old friend an explanation. During the last days it hadn't come to a longer conversation between them and Sirius had neither searched for an opportunity. The relationship between them was strangely aloof. They had become strangers. Nothing had remained of the closeness and the trust which had once been between them. If they had been alone, an uncomfortable silence had hung over them for the most time. And now they silently stared at each other, not knowing how to begin, how they should bridge the last ten years. It was Remus' voice which hesitantly broke the silence.
"Why did you flee then, Sirius? Why didn't you come to me and told me the truth?"
Sirius swallowed, tried to gather up enough courage and yet knew that, if he didn't tell the truth now, every chance for a new beginning between them would be destroyed.
"Perhaps I should have really done that. Perhaps thus much sorrow would have been spared Harry and us. I don't know, Remus. But when I found James and Lily, I was beside myself. And the knowledge that it had been me who had persuaded them to trust Peter was unbearable. James and Lily wanted to have me as the Secret Keeper. Lily wasn't taken much with my suggestion to trust Peter. I, however, was convinced…I thought…"
"…that it would be the perfect solution to prevent that James' and Lily's hiding place would ever be found." Remus finished the sentence.
"You've suspected me, didn't you? You've thought I had gone over to Voldemort."
Sirius forced himself to look Remus straight into the eyes.
"Yes, I did. And that I'll never forgive myself. I've done it because you are a werewolf and that is inexcusable. I don't know whether you'll be ever able to forgive me for this. But that I realized only later. In that night at Godric's Hollow, Remus, I was stunned, speechless, couldn't believe what had happened. And as Hagrid came then and said that Harry should live with his aunt and uncle, there I couldn't do anything else but to flee. I only wanted to bring Harry to safety and I feared that I would be taken to Azkaban, before I could explain the truth."
„You know that it happened a few times. Even the Order brought innocents into prison." he added a moment later and realized only know that they still were standing in Harry's room.
Remus was silent and finally shook his head.
"Come Sirius, let Harry sleep and recover. There is no point in thinking about what could have happened, had you not escaped with Harry. The main thing is that Harry and we are alive and that Voldemort has been defeated. And Harry and Faith will get well again."
Amazed Sirius followed Remus out.
"Then you are…then you aren't…"
Remus put a hand on his arm, smiled sadly at him.
"Yes, Sirius, I've forgiven you. You have, I think, suffered enough by knowing which consequences you decisions caused then. Apart from that I have to ask your forgiveness, too.
I've suspected you as well. For years I believed that you betrayed James and Lily. Though I, actually, should have known that you wouldn't be capable of doing such a thing. And also for fighting against you then, as we met and I didn't listen to you. I'm sorry."
Mutely Sirius stared at Remus. Unable to say anything, he timidly reached out his arms.
The next moment they hugged each other. As they both had regained back their composure, Sirius said,
"It's already forgotten. After all, it was me who injured you, for what I'm sorry in turn. And Remus, thank you; thank you for everything you did for Harry, Sara and Faith."
Remus nodded, his cheeks turning red.
"For this you don't need to thank me. That was self-explaining."
A little later they walked together to the terrace. Sirius gazed at little Faith who, wrapped up in a colourful blanket, slept peacefully in Sara's arms and then looked up into the bright blue sky. Yes, the nightmare was finally over and as soon as Faith and Harry would be again on their feet, they would catch up with celebrating Harry's birthday later.
As Harry woke up, he was lying in a bed. He opened his eyes and blinked. The bright light which streamed into his room pained him. Where was he? What had happened?
Memories rose in him, but it were only fractions and they slipped away from him again.
Carefully he turned his head. His gaze fell on a small figure who sat sleeping in the armchair which stood next to his bed.
All of a sudden his memories returned. He froze and sat abruptly up, only to sink back into his cushions with a groan as pain exploded in his head.
"Harry, you are awake!"
"Faith…." Harry whispered and just couldn't grasp it as Faith jumped up and threw herself into his arms.
"You are alive."
One moment later Sirius and Sara entered the room. With beaming faces they embraced him.
"Sirius." Harry breathed and could hardly believe it. It took long until he withdrew from Sirius' arms.
"What happened? Where were you? We thought Voldemort had taken you…"
Sirius gave him a squeeze and shook his head. Then he began to tell how the Veritaserum that had been given to him had made him ill and how Peter had abducted him out of Hogwarts.
"We had almost left Hogwarts already as my thoughts became clearer. Perhaps it was the fresh air; anyway I became aware of my surroundings again. I recognized Peter and attacked him. Something that hadn't been the most intelligent, I know. Moreover I did not even have a wand, but my anger and hate were stronger. And hadn't I been such a wreck, after those fools poured Veritaserum into me in bucketfuls, I would have defeated him.
Thus Peter, however, managed to put me out of action. I don't know why but he dragged me to the Shrieking Shack, tied me up there and left me then alone. I think he just panicked. Besides, he had always had difficulties to deal even with the easiest spells when he was excited and nervous. Maybe he wanted to fetch reinforcement. But for whatever reason he left me in the Shrieking Shack, it was a more than unbelieving luck.
I knew that I had to leave the Shack as soon as possible. But I couldn't untie the bonds. Desperate I tried to find a way out. Finally I transformed into my Animagus form and thus managed to cast off my bonds. The next four days I spent on the streets. I was still a bit disorientated and exhausted. So it took a bit longer for me to finally reach Godric's Hollow. There I thought I would be able to recover and to regain my strength. Then I wanted to return home, and to you. But as I reached Godric's Hollow, I saw to my greatest horror you and Faith surrounded by Voldemort and his followers. I had hardly seen you, there I already acted. Without thinking I rushed straight at Voldemort and his Death Eaters."
Sirius fell silent, seized his shoulders and drew him close.
"Never again give me such a fright, Harry. Do you understand me?" he said and pushed him a bit away.
Harry nodded and sank back into the cushions.
"What happened to Voldemort?"
Sirius smiled coldly.
"He is defeated. We've killed him. And this time he really is dead. It will still take long until all followers of Voldemort have been found and taken to court, but I'm sure that the war will be over soon, now where Voldemort was killed."
Harry shuddered as he recalled Voldemort's red, merciless eyes.
"I'm glad." he quietly said and then he remembered something.
"How did Dumbledore get here, by the way? Where did he know it from?"
"For that we have to thank Bigi." Sara said.
"As we heard Sirius' barking and raced in the garden, she set off to Hogwarts."
"Yes, she saved us all. If no help had come…" Sirius said, but didn't finish his sentence. Shaking his head, he ran a hand over his forehead.
"Bigi I completely had forgotten. That I didn't see her then…but even if it presumably wouldn't have changed anything."
"How did Voldemort actually know that we were in Godric's Hollow?" Harry asked after a while.
Sirius' eyes darkened all of a sudden.
"We don't know for sure. We can only assume it. But I fear that Peter searched for me and when he found out that you were staying in Godric's Hollow, he must have informed his master immediately." he said and pressed his teeth together.
"Peter, that rat, has disappeared of course; escaped. But one day he will pay for it. One day he will pay for what he did to James and Lily and us."
Then he smiled and brushed a strand of hair out of Harry's face.
"But now sleep. You are still rather pale, Harry. And I will inform Remus and Claire. They were also worried about you."
Sara gave him a bit tea, feed him like a baby and covered him with the blanket. The last thing that Harry saw was Sara, chasing Faith out.
