i know i havent updated anything for a while for this fanfic cos i kind of ran out of ideas. but then i had this really weird dream about aro and i that got me going:) Hope you guys like this one! DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT(BUT IT THINK EVERYONE KNOWS THAT ALREADY)
Ways to annoy Aro
Dye all of his cloaks pink
Then print 'I'm a Barbie girl on them'
When he starts killing everyone, tell him that it was all Caius' fault
When he starts fighting Caius, and realises that it wasn't him, tell him that it's your special power(designing clothes)
Then ask him if you could join the Volturi
If he doesn't seem convinced, tell him that you're a great designer and black is so not in this year
If he looks offended, tell him that you don't mean it in a bad way and tell him that he could help you design new outfits
When he finally agrees, totally change their cloaks to cheerleader outfits with little pompoms
Ask him why his eyes are pink every second
Then say: 'oh I get it! You wear pink contacts cos you like pink!'
When he goes mad and tries to rip you apart, say: 'oh no! That's okay! Don't be ashamed'
When he looks like he's going to explode because of anger say: 'oh...don't worry.... I'll wear pink contacts too if you want' then walk away
While walking away say: 'tsk,tsk...the dude has problems'
Go round Volterra impersonating him, with glitter all over your body and a very dodgy black wig
Let him catch you then say: 'hey bro! How's it hanging?'
When he looks kind of confused or angry... say: 'that hurts man! That really hurts! You don't even recognise your OWN brother!'
When he tries to comfort you, ignore him while pouting
Hit him with a tree to just to test if his skin is not as hard as granite
He'll obviously look confuse...so... take a picture of it add a caption saying : 'Aro looking confused in more than one way'
Then keep whacking him with the tree for the fun of it
Dye his hair white and say: 'hey Aro! I thought you can't age!'
Walk away and say: 'the dude's got SERIOUS problems!'
Collect all the evidence and hide them under Caius' bed
Hold his hand all day and think of disturbing thoughts
Then think of you and him making out
To ensure he doesn't let go or....err... kill you, get jasper to mess with his emotions and make him think that he loves you(sort of)
Send him a letter or something that says you're going to reveal his secret
Then go to Italy with glitter all over you while wearing fake fangs
When he gets you sent to his 'lair' and almost gets you killed, scream like a fan girl while saying I love you Aro!!!! You're so awesome!! Then kneel down and start praising him
When he looks at you funny, get your Aro diary and record his confused face and his other movements
Then say them out loud with your eyes filled with admiration
Then ask him silly questions like:
What's your favourite colour?
Do you wear briefs or boxers?
Who's your favourite bro?
Have you ever considered having a tan?
Can you sparkle too?
Get Edward to send him letters saying: 'HAHA! YOU DIDNT FIGHT US!!!! YOU COWARDS!!! AHAHA!'
Make a survey whether or not people think he's deranged and alter them so that it says that he is crazy
Then send it to him with a letter from a mental hospital saying that he needs special treatment(don't forget to send it anonymously so he can't find you)
When he starts looking for the person who made the survey, send him a note that it was Mike Newton (to anyone who likes Mike, sorry)
