Chapter Twelve - Breakage

Kyoko smiled softly as she sat in her own bed with Kuon's head on her lap. She loved holding him like this and letting her fingers run through his hair, although she had to be careful with his injuries. Somehow the burn that was on the right side of his forehead had become infected and there was now damage on his cheek both on the outside and to the nerves below.

Certain alignments in his body didn't seem correct either as if he had been forced into a cramped environment for too long – with his tall frame it was very possible – and he struggled to stand and move at times, she had already developed a method of how to catch him despite the size difference.

Even now, he was having a nightmare and she was trying to figure out the best way of calming him down. Although Kuon insisted on using the words crazy and insane, she had agreed with Kuu that Kuon was facing depression and anxiety that were part of post-traumatic stress.

She didn't know how to get her husband out into the sunlight anymore, but at least she could keep him safe in the dim light that might come from a candle. She smiled as she let her fingers graze through his blond strands. "You know," she laughed talking to herself more than him, "You were the first person to ever let me cry. You were the first person to listen to me and understand me. I'm so relieved that our paths met, that we met up again, that you let me fall in love with you. Right now, imagining a world where I'm separated from you is my biggest fear. I can't believe it used to be falling in love, now it's not having that love."

She leaned down and kissed him very gently on the uninjured part of his forehead. "Thank you, Corn."

She really admired his strength. Even going through what he went through, the first night he had agreed to spend some time with his kids and had read Kou his favorite book. She knew how afraid he was inside, but he was a wonderful daddy. She was happy that they hadn't taken away that aspect of him.

She smiled a little as she felt him move and look up at her,

"Hey?" he asked as he looked at her, "Have I kept you here for a long time?" he asked, "Sorry, didn't know that I'd actually fall asleep," he apologized.

"I could sit here for much longer," Kyoko grinned to him happily. "It's been a while since we've both been in the house together. The kids are so happy that you're back," she said, "I'm so happy that you're home."

Kuon nodded before getting up slowly and carefully, he caught his reflection in the mirror of the expensive vanity table he had given Kyoko for one of her birthdays and froze. He looked at the scarring on his face and he started shaking. Reflections were something he couldn't deal with. He backed away until he was sitting silently on the side of the bed.

"No," he whispered, "no…." his eyes glazed over which always worried Kyoko, "no, how dare you hurt her! She's perfect! How dare you!" he yelled before his hand reached out and he knocked over a vase of flowers nearby.

Kyoko's eyes widened as she saw that his hand had been cut and he still wasn't breaking out of this state. She didn't know what to attend to first, her heart beat was growing quicker and more intense inside of her chest.

She looked down at the broken glass then she looked at her husband's cut hand and then she looked at his face. The part she hated was seeing that inner turmoil, she quickly grabbed her husband and pulled him to her. "Close your eyes," she directed quickly as he did so.

She held him closer as she ran her hand through his hair whilst holding him close, "Deep breaths okay, my prince," she said, "follow my breaths. Oh my sweet corn," she said, a pet name she used when she really needed to comfort him. "I'm telling you Corn, don't move until you're ready or I'll get very very upset."

She held him feeling him break down inside and felt her heart break feeling him start to physically cry. After a while he had pulled away and she looked into his broken eyes. She grabbed his hand as she noticed that he looked back at the vase and stood up.

"I'm so sorry," he quickly apologized as Kyoko once again was reminded of his stolen confidence, "I'll go and clean that up," he told her as he tried to get off the bed.

"No," Kyoko shook her head sternly, "You sit here, I'm going to go get you some bandages and ointment for your hand," she said as he looked down at it. Kyoko placed her hand on her husband's cheek and guided his eyes towards hers. "Are you okay?" she asked very concerned.

Kuon nodded silently, he felt ashamed of what had happened and how he hadn't been able to control it.

He watched as Kyoko left the room before looking at his hands, he started to lick the blood off of it feeling a sick and twisted kind of comfort in doing so.

….

….

Ren had had a late day on his acting shoot, they had gone through the scenes so quickly that more had been added on and the director was very happy to be able to film at night. Of course that meant that Ren would have to call Kyoko in the morning and explain to his girlfriend why he hadn't told her he loved her as he usually did at the end of the night.

Still, he had to come into the office to pick up the next copy of the script for his drama. He was also hoping to see the R Mandy pictures from his latest shoot and maybe sneak some photos on his phone for Kyoko – who always seemed to demand it -.

As he made his way over to the desk, he saw a figure hidden in the shadows and blinked.

"I'm so sorry for…" he started before hearing the person crying. He looked over, "Are you alright?" he asked kindly before hearing Kyoko's voice.

"Ren?" she asked, "I'm sorry," she said as he blinked hard.

What on earth was Kyoko doing just sitting down in a tight ball in this room.

"It was the only door that was still open," she tried to explain as he came over to her and sat down, letting his arm fall around her and pulling her close to him.

"Yes, I needed to get some things, they said they'd leave it open for me," he tried to explain before wrapping his arms around her more securely. "What is it, princess, what's wrong?" he asked as he kissed the top of her head.

"They told me if I got any more NGs that I wouldn't be able to continue the shoot," she whispered, "everyone is talking about this movie. If I can't do it then what will happen to my career?" she asked before pushing her head into his warm chest and Kuon felt the tears soak into his shirt.

"Well, maybe I should come with you," he said comforting her, "or maybe we could practice tonight," he heard Kyoko about to speak and cut her off, "I know what you're going to argue, that I'm a senior actor and I need my sleep since I have work too. That is true, I'm not going to deny that, but what is more important to me than my career is your career and especially you. Kyoko, we're going to practice tonight because I'm going to get a better rest if I see you smiling honestly."

Kyoko laughed, "How did you know I couldn't sleep when you're upset or going through something?" she asked him as he grinned.

"Because we're the same," he said, "so, let's get going, we've got a script to go through," he smiled as she nodded allowing him to take away her fear and her pain. He was really good at doing that.

….

….

"I'm sorry," Kyoko said as she got back onto the bed by Kuon trying to avoid the broken glass. She had seen him licking his wound but had decided not to comment on it. She knew how afraid Kuon was to show her what was underneath the denial that he wasn't alright, she wouldn't ask him or push him to tell her that yet. All she could do was support him.

"This might hurt a little at first, but we need to get the blood cleaned off," she said as she put something onto a cotton ball and started to dab away at the blood to get a clearer view of the cut. She hummed before putting a mix between a pharmacy cream and a lotion she had bought for him onto the cut hoping it would help. "Are you okay? Can you take the soreness?" she asked nervously.

"Yeah," Kuon nodded in a shaking voice, "Yes, I'm okay."

"Good," Kyoko smiled before she took the bandage and gently bandaged his hand the best that she could. She made sure to make it tight but not too tight. "Now that's done, I'm going to go get something to clean up the glass," she kissed his lips and then pulled back. "I love you," she reminded him before leaving again.

Kuon looked down at the bandage. How much work and stress was he putting her through? He knew that he had had almost a full year of taking care of her when everyone, even the two of them, had believed her to be ill, but that didn't mean she had to pay him back for that. He did it because he loved her, he should help her with this too and not force her to take care of him.

"I love you too" he called out to her and she smiled back at him before coming back with a dustpan and brush as well as something to soak up the water.

"I'm putting you through too much," he worried as she looked up at him and shook her head. "Isn't this the type of thing that Fuwa would make yo-"

"Shou Fuwa is not, nor will he ever be, my husband," Kyoko argued. "Don't you dare worry about what I'm doing for you, Kuon," she said with a fire in her eyes. "You don't treat me as your house servant, you treat me as your wife, as a woman who is allowed to do anything she wants and what I want most of all is to make sure that you're alright. You have given me everything, supported me in anything I wanted to do. Right now I want to help my husband so do the great job you have always done and let me do what I choose to do," she said as she managed to get all the glass off the floor.

Kyoko smiled only a few moments later as she managed to dispose of the glass and make sure that the floor was safe and dry. She came back onto the bed and looked at the man she adored. "Every time I am able to help you, it makes me happy. You make me happy. Knowing that I am with the emperor and the prince at the same time is such a blessing to me. Knowing I am with someone wonderful and magical and beautiful, yes you are still gorgeous," she said as she looked at his lips for a moment and then back into his exquisite green eyes, "is the most amazing honor I have been given. You share with me your magic every day and make me feel loved and treasured and beautiful, the only wish I have is that you know how much I love you, Kuon."

She saw him nod, the tears still in his eyes. "I think we should spend some time with the kids together," she said before taking his hand. "I know you don't want to be in Tokyo right now, so why don't we go to that forest we found near her and you can tell us all about nature and all the birds. I'm so lucky to be with a guy who is so interested and knowledgeable about nature and we all love it when you talk about the different animals."

Kuon looked down feeling happy that his wife did like that about him, it wasn't his most masculine element.

"You'd like that, right?" Kyoko asked nervously as she saw him thinking without speaking. Maybe she had said the wrong thing.

"I'd love that," he smiled as he watched her, he took in how beautiful she was inside and outside. "Thank you," she said before she snuggled closer to him.

"No, Kuon, thank you…for being my husband, for being a father. Most of all Corn, thank you for being you."