Reunion
EdwardPOV
I'm frozen in shock as I try to process what my sister has just said. Bella had a baby. My baby. Who is now almost five years old.
My eyes are wide and I feel my stomach do a thousand back flips all in the space of a single minute. My heart beats wildly and I'm glad that Alice had me sit down. The little girl looking at me expectantly from Bella's friend's side could not be mine. But it's undeniable. She has emerald green eyes, just like mine, and brown hair with reddish tinges in it that are the same colour as mine.
Lily. Her name is Lily.
Little Lily looks at me strangely for a minute, and then her eyes brighten and she says in a soprano voice not unlike Alice's, "Hi, it's nice to meet you! I'm Lily, what's your name?"
And suddenly all I can see is Bella. She may have my eyes and hair but she also has the same heart-shaped face and pale skin as her mom. And when she speaks warmth floods through my veins.
I hadn't known Bella well. She was always just Alice's best friend. But whenever she had turned sixteen Bella had blossomed. It was like over night she had turned from an awkward teenager into a smart and confident young woman. I had been majorly attracted to her physically, even before that night. I didn't see her often, but when I did it had been hard to keep my eyes off her. She would speak to me politely and I would manage to get out a few words, and then she'd disappear to make small talk with someone else.
And then that night happened. Bella had come stumbling into that room and just thrown her dress over her head. She was a little drunk, but then so was I, and I didn't have the willpower to resist her when she was right there in front of me like that. And flirting too. I hadn't known she was a virgin. If I had I would've been much gentler, but she never once told me to stop or gave me any indication that she didn't like it.
And I never once thought to put on a fucking condom that night. God that was so damn irresponsible of me.
When I woke up the next morning Bella was gone. I figured it was no big deal, that she just had to get home. I would ask Alice for her number later and maybe we could go out sometime. But when Alice came home that evening she was crying, after having just taken Bella to the airport. So my chance was gone. I asked for her number anyway, I figured the least I could do was apologise for taking advantage of her the night before, but Alice never gave it to me.
And now they're telling me that Bella got pregnant. And how could I deny it when the proof is standing here in front of me, waiting for me to speak.
I pull myself out of my reverie. I would think my behaviour would've scared her but she just waits patiently, smiling.
"Hi," I say softly, "My name's Edward."
She holds out her little hand to shake mine, and I can't help the smile that graces my face as my hand envelopes hers.
And then it crosses my mind. "Where is Bella?" I ask no one in particular, because surely she's the one that should be here telling me I have a daughter.
They all exchange looks, my sister, her husband and the two strangers.
"Lily, sweetie, let's go take a walk outside," the blonde woman says, and leaves again with the little girl, with my daughter.
"Edward," Alice looks at me sadly and there are tears shining in her eyes.
"She's not..." I can't bring myself to finish the question.
"No." Alice says quickly. "No, but there was an accident. It was bad. Bella's in a coma, she has been for the last eight weeks. It doesn't look like she's going to wake up any time soon."
I cover my face with my hands. Alice was so quick to say that she's not dead, but I'm a doctor. I know that the chances of a patient waking from a coma decrease significantly the longer they remain comatose.
Despite everything I don't feel mad at Bella. Maybe it's just too raw and I'm too in shock. Maybe I'll be mad later, but right now I'm just confused. I can't understand why she wouldn't tell me she was pregnant. I could've helped her. I could've dropped out of school and gotten a job to look after her and the baby. And Alice and the rest of my family would've helped too. Alice and Bella were best friends for Christ's sake!
Alice knew. Alice knew Bella had my baby and she never thought I had a right to know.
"Edward? Are you okay?" she asks and I realise we've been sitting in silence for nearly ten minutes.
I look at her, and then to Jasper, then the big guy. "Why did no one tell me? Alice you're my sister! And you've kept this from me for five years!" I shout. Maybe it made sense to Bella not to tell me but my own sister? How could she look me in the eye every day when she was keeping this huge secret from me? I don't think I've ever felt so betrayed.
"Edward it's not like that I swear!" Alice's eyes fill up with tears.
"I'm so sorry Edward. I didn't know Bella was pregnant or that she had Lily, not until a few weeks ago anyway. Bella stopped answering my calls. I hadn't seen or heard from her in five years!"
I take a few calming breaths. Alice didn't know either. Bella did this all on her own.
"You should've told me the second you found out."
"I think the circumstances here made things a little complicated, Edward, don't you?" Jasper steps in, putting an arm around his wife.
"What happens now? What do I do now?" I ask, my voice breaking at the end of the question. I have a child. A child whose mother has just suffered a terrible accident and whose life has just been turned upside down.
"Have you eaten?" Jasper asks me. I shake my head no.
"Well then here's what we're gonna do. Alice and Emmett and I," he says indicating the large man standing near the door, "are gonna go into the kitchen and make you something to eat. You are going to stay in here and read that letter," he indicates the envelope I have half crushed in my hand, "and come join us when you're ready."
When the door closes behind them, I take a closer look at the little envelope. My name and my parents' address is written on the front in smudged black ink in small tidy handwriting. I take a deep breath and try to still my shaking fingers as I tear it open. A letter falls out, and another envelope with Alice's name written on it. I unfold the piece of paper.
Edward,
I know that this will be hard for you and that you haven't heard from me in a long time, but after our night together I found out I was pregnant. I have a daughter. We have a daughter. I'm sorry if you're upset by my decision not to tell you. You were at Dartmouth. You wanted to be a doctor and I couldn't bring myself to blow up both our futures like that. I don't know you all that well but if you're anything like the rest of your family I know you'll do right by my little girl. Her name is Lily Alice Swan. If you're reading this then something has happened to me. As much as I hate the idea that I might not get to be there to watch her grow up, I know that she'll be okay. She has so many people who love her. I want you to raise her but I accept that it's your decision and if you don't want to her godparents and grandfather will be more than willing to look after her. I wish things had been different, but I wouldn't give Lily up for the world. If you ever do read this please let her know that I love her so much more than I ever thought possible. I hope you make the right choice and good luck.
Love,
Isabella Swan.
It's so short it seems impossible that this one letter could change my life so completely and irrevocably. How different might my life have been if I had known all this five years ago? I still have so many questions and the only person who can answer them is unconscious in a hospital bed somewhere. Tears fall freely down my face. Tears for Bella, tears for me and Lily and the five years that we've missed out on.
Well I'm not going to miss out on anymore time. I roughly wipe the remaining tears from my eyes, steel myself, and make my way to the kitchen to officially meet my daughter.
When I enter the kitchen the conversation immediately ceases, so it's not hard to guess what they have been talking about. I hold my tongue and let it slide. Lily sits on the high wooden stool beside the island with a glass of milk, while the four adults stand around her, sipping hot tea.
"All good?" Jasper asks cautiously.
"All good," I say, grabbing a mug for myself and joining them. Someone has made me a sandwich too, but my stomach is still reeling so I leave it aside.
The blonde woman comes toward me, extending her hand, "Alice introduced me before," she says, "But I'm guessing you had other things on your mind. I'm Rosalie McCarthy, and this is my husband Emmett." She indicates the other man and he comes forward to shake my hand too. "We're Lily's godparents," she adds.
"Right," I say, "Nice to meet you."
I can see that Rosalie is still sizing me up, deciding whether or not they have made the right decision in coming here, asking herself if there was some reason why Bella hadn't told me about Lily.
My eyes fall back to Lily, chatting happily to Jasper and Alice.
"Does she know who I am?" I ask Rosalie and Emmett.
"We haven't told her," Rosalie answers, "And I don't think that Bella ever did either. But she's fairly intuitive. She's not usually so quick to talk to strangers the way she did with you earlier."
"Can I tell her?" I ask them without taking my eyes off of Lily.
Rosalie looks towards Lily and then to her husband. They share a look, then he puts a hand on her shoulder and says, "It's your call. I think she'd like to know who you are."
I put my mug of tea down on the island and take the stool beside Lily.
"Hi," I say smiling.
"Hi," she responds cheerfully.
"Lily, do you know who I am? Do you know why Alice and Rosalie brought you here to meet me?"
"Because you're my daddy," she says simply, shocking everyone in the room.
"Lily, sweetie, how do you know that?" Rosalie asks coming up behind her to play with her hair.
"Because Mommy told me."
"She did?" Alice asks taken aback.
"Yeah, when she showed me the picture of my daddy, my auntie Alice and my gramma and grandpa. She said you were all gonna be so happy to meet me some day."
"When did she tell you that, Lily?" I ask curiously.
"When we did Snow White and all the mommies and daddies came to see it and I asked why my daddy wasn't there." She says playing with the plastic rings on her fingers. "And then she showed me the picture."
"Did she tell you why I wasn't there, sweetheart?" I ask nervously.
"Because you live far away! Like grandpa and auntie Alice. Can I watch TV?" She asks, oblivious to the significance of this conversation.
"No, sweetie, it's almost bedtime," Rose says when no one else seems capable of answering.
"Is that okay with you, Lily?" I ask, "That I'm your daddy?"
"'Course silly," She smiles, reaching her small hand over and patting mine.
She's incredible. She's so young but she's already such a little character, her own person. She's smart and intuitive and so damn cute.
"Am I allowed to call you daddy?" she asks, looking at me inquiringly.
I'm startled by the question. I've never been anyone's daddy before and it's gonna take some getting used to.
"Do you want to call me daddy?" I ask her.
She nods shyly.
"Then it's fine by me," I say smiling and pulling her onto my lap to cuddle her for the very first time. I have five years worth of cuddles to make up for.
Daddy. I quite like the sound of it.
I ask Lily about anything and everything, wanting to get to know her. I want to know what she likes and doesn't like, where she goes to school, who her friends are, what her favourite foods and tv shows are. I want to know everything there is to know about her life. The others steadily drift away to do their own thing. Alice and Jasper disappear into the sitting room to watch my TV, and Emmett follows them shortly after.
Rosalie was the last to leave. For half an hour she watched me with Lily like a hawk, but eventually she seemed convinced that I could be trusted with my daughter, and went to find the others, giving me and Lily some privacy.
I notice Lily yawn and realise it is getting rather late for a young girl to still be up. I pick her up and head to the sitting room, her head lolling against my shoulder as she fights sleep.
"She's um... falling asleep," I tell Rosalie, who seems to be Lily's primary care giver since Bella is out of action. She nods and moves to get up.
"Where are you staying?" I ask them suddenly.
"Alice and Jasper are putting us up for a while," Emmett tells me. "We're gonna start looking for an apartment to rent next week."
"And Lily's staying with me?" I ask hopefully. I've only just met my daughter and I'm not ready to let her go yet.
Alice and Rosalie exchange a look. "Let's not rush things, Edward," Alice says gently. "This is all a big change for her, it's probably best if she stays with Rose and Em for a few days."
"You guys can stay here too," I offer. "I have a couple spare rooms. It would be no trouble! I just... I want to get to know her," I finish looking at my shoes.
Rosalie looks a little unsure, but Alice whispers something in her ear and she gives me a hesitant smile. "You're sure it wouldn't be any trouble?"
"Not at all," I say grinning, knowing I have won. "Is that a yes?"
"Yes, okay. If you're sure it's no trouble."
Emmett and Rose go outside to bring in their suitcases from the jeep, and Alice and Jasper go upstairs to make up the beds in the spare rooms.
Rose returns with a pair of powder blue pyjamas for Lily and leaves me to dress her. It takes me a minute, but eventually I manage to navigate the sleeping child in my arms into the correct holes for arms and legs.
Emmett comes back and wakes her up to go brush her teeth.
Alice and Jasper come to say their goodbyes. I give Jasper a hug, then pull Alice in, holding her tightly.
"Thanks, Ali," I say.
"No probs, big bro," she smiles.
I pull the letter from my pocket. "She wrote this for you, Al. It fell out when I opened my letter."
Alice turns pale, but mutters her thanks and hurries to catch up to Jasper.
"Why don't you tuck her in Edward?" Rosalie suggests when they're done. I thank her, and she and Emmett give Lily a kiss and wish me goodnight before disappearing into their room just down the hall.
I carry Lily to her bed. The room isn't ideal for a five year old girl. The walls are white and the bed sheets and curtains boring floral patterns that my mom picked out. I'll have to do some redecorating.
The poor little girl is exhausted. I lay her down in the double bed. She's so small it makes the bed look king-sized. I pull the covers up to her chin and tuck them in around her.
"Daddy?" She asks, yawning.
"I'm here sweetie."
She half smiles and whispers into her pillow, "I love you Daddy."
A grin covers my face.
"I love you too Lily," I whisper, but she's already fast asleep.
