After her first class, Emily had a set lunch with Jessica. The girl returned from southern winter wedding planning radiating happiness and sunshine. Emily felt like the spokesperson for seasonal affective disorder.

Over at the swimmer's table, Paige was being infuriatingly normal. Emily hadn't gotten a moment with Paige since the girl bolted from Rosewood with Pru. Paige was next to Pru and Collin, of all people. All smiles and inside jokes; Emily could have sworn their arms were too close together- who did Paige think she was fooling? Jacob's arm, in contrast, seemed stiff around Pru, he looked jittery. Emily felt bad for noticing. She ought to have a hopeful outlook on their lives. Emily had to remind herself that she was not a bitter person. She was sweet and happy Emily Fucking Fields. She managed to be charming and kind, even with glass in her hair.

"I can't believe Maya actually came to your house... twice!" Jessica interrupted her hate-staring. Jessica was going to push the topic, eager with anticipation. Emily hadn't actually talked through The Maya Thing with a friend yet.

"Well, she lives across the street. It was still bizarre," Emily admitted.

"And you broke it off with the Samara," Jessica looked like she was solving a puzzle. She'd only been gone a month plus break. Emily was annoyed that her life had gotten so dramatic in the meantime. "So, was it bad or romantic?" Jessica asked, with a smile. Emily could tell she was hoping for the latter; she clearly remembered all the wonderful things Emily had told her about Maya.

"Well, I think it was supposed to be romantic. She brought me a stuffed fish," Emily bit her lip.

"Stuffed animals are super intimate," Jessica stated without an ounce of humor. Emily quirked an eyebrow, "You sleep with it in your bed," Jessica smiled. Emily thought that was a pretty good assessment, and then felt icky about Nemo.

"Maya talked all about the excitement of college and how she didn't want either of us to be tied down."

Jessica groaned, which was exactly Emily's internal reaction to that statement. Then again, it bothered Emily coming from perfect, engaged Jessica. "She imagines I'll show up when she's ready. Because I'm the girl," Emily sighed, she wasn't charmed by this sentiment two nights ago, and she certainly didn't care for it now, "I'm the kind of girl she wants to end up with..." Emily trailed off.

"Well, that's a pile of shit.".

Emily nodded her head. She knew and it no longer hurt. She had been down destructive paths when Maya broke up with her. She used to think that she could have kept Maya if they'd slept together. Emily had wished she could have been one of those fun, spontaneous, 'right now' people that were partying in Maya's room during their Skype conversations. And regarding sex, Emily loved Maya; she wanted to be intimate. Emily just didn't need it like Maya did.

The more she thought about it, especially in the context of Samara, she knew that she'd been wrong. For the first time, she was grateful for Maya's break up and even Samara's pushiness. Her fun wasn't parties and drugs. Her fun was scary movies and silly flirting. With Paige, she tried to shake the last part from her head. "Plus, Maya met Paige when she visited... it was awkward," Emily had been so caught up thinking about Paige, that hadn't gotten to actually mentioning the visit or the kiss. "She told me that she thought Paige and I were a couple, from all the Facebook pictures," Emily bit into her tongue. She felt manipulative, gauging Jessica's reactions this way.

Jessica let out a 'hmph,' "As if you would ever be interested in that snotty bitch."

"That's not fair. Paige and I have come a long way since last term," Emily calmly understated. She looked back over the dining hall crowd. This time Paige was already staring at her. Paige looked a little concerned, caught Emily's eye. Jessica was going on about Emily being a saint for her forgiveness, taking more jabs at Paige. Emily was filtering it out, letting herself look into Paige's brown eyes. Paige looked down and started messing with her food and Emily knew the girl wouldn't look up again.

Inside Emily, something had been awake and ticking. She noticed her own knee bouncing and her hands fidgeting with her fork. She wanted Paige so badly that she couldn't keep her body still.


"What the hell is on your chin?" Paige's dad asked, in place of a greeting. It had been a long first couple days back. Paige got an email from her dad right after the election results were posted, organizing this meeting. Her dad was sitting at his desk at work in his bright red campaign tie.

"I fell... off a bike," Paige sighed, knowing this wasn't going to go well.

"WHAT?!"

"I... " Paige wasn't really expecting sympathy, but her dad was outright furious. She started to get mad, too, not really sure why. "Dad, aren't we going to talk about the nomination?"

"Why would you do this, Paige?" Her dad asked, exasperated.

Um, because I really had it in for a tree? Paige thought, "No reason. It just happened," she mumbled

"I've been talking to Marlene about your behavior lately," her dad began. Marlene was his press secretary. "She has kids, she knows how you can act out." Of course, 'you' was simultaneously Paige as well as a blanket over all teenagers. Paige so appreciated being clumped into that category. "These last few months have been riddled with cries for attention. And Paige, I don't have time for this now. We have to act as a team."

"How is it a cry for attention?" Paige was at a loss, this was absurd, "I didn't even tell you!" Paige exclaimed.

"Don't scream, Paige! Were you raised in a zoo?!" Her dad asked, stern.

"You wouldn't know, you weren't there!" Paige threw back, hoping it hurt. She could have thrown the laptop out her window. She could imagine how the glass would fly. But, God forbid she get a scrape while doing it...

"Unacceptable. You clearly can't handle adulthood on your own. Certainly not during an election. I'm sending help."

"Great. Perfect. Will they bring make up? Because I have a scrapes on my arm, too... I was hoping for the kind with formaldehyde, dad." Her dad sighed and rolled his eyes and she finally felt like an ass for stooping under the low bar he'd set for her.

"Paige," her dad said shaking his head. He looked tired. "You need to be kept on track. I've been letting you run wild these past months and that is going to stop now. We can talk details later." Then he hung up. Paige opened her mouth for... well, to say something. Close your mouth, you're not drowning.

"You're not even doing it yourself!" Paige yelled at her dead Skype call, "I didn't break any bones, thanks for asking, Senator Robotic Asshat! Entitled piece of crap- TEAM is the worst word for goddamn- UGH!" Paige yelled with increasing incoherence at her blank screen until all she could do was brushing everything in front of her laptop onto the floor.

Emily walked in the room to see Paige, red in the face, yelling at her computer. Paige was now throwing the closest book to the floor, hard. The tattered paperback smacked their dorm carpet, softly. It was delightfully anti-climactic. Emily wondered if she should feel guilty for thinking tantrum-Paige was kind of cute. "Umm... Paige?"

Paige noticed Emily, turned a deeper shade of red and clenched her eyes shut, "Gotta go," she said, not even bothering to think of an excuse. She grabbed the book off the ground and threw it in her bag, grabbed her keys and took off. She was humiliated that Emily had seen her fit. She let herself cry on the way down the stairs.

Emily sighed and picked the hole punch and pens off the floor, rearranged the papers on Paige's desk into piles and then messing them up a little, worried that Paige would be offended. She didn't feel like being in this room either, at this point. Emily packed homework and her laptop into her backpack and took off. She had to choose between the coffee shop and the library. Knowing how much Paige loved the library, she headed to the coffee shop.


Paige was trekking through the snow at a machine gun clip. Every step brought to mind some new thing she wished she had, Headphones, the right homework assignment, headphones, headphones. Damnit, how was she going to survive studying at the coffee shop without headphones! She sent a short message to Pru, Wanna study at Home Brew? No big deal. I'm just going to be there. Probably till they close. So if you feel like coming by. I'll be studying.

Paige was going to mention her lack of headphones, when she got distracted by the unsteady crunching snow under clumsy jogger.

"Paige! Wait up!" Collin was a little out of breath from chasing her through the snow.

Paige slowed for him. She hadn't talked to Collin alone since she left Ohio.

"Oh, hi, guy," Paige tried to be polite and wipe away remaining tears before he could catch up. Luckily, she could blame the cold winter for her stuffy nose.

"You were weird at lunch," he stated, though he didn't seem angry or upset. "And you're missing some aces shit at boxing club. We had some mixed martial arts guys join," he smiled, enthusiastically, trying to keep up. Paige kept walking quickly with her head down. Collin was hoping to get some eye contact, at least. He thought their friendship had progressed over break.

"So it got homoerotic?" Paige finally threw him a joke.

"And dangerous!" he exclaimed, "The two things you like best, right McCullers?" he jokingly poked at her arm.

The tops of Paige's ears turned red and slowed her pace, part of her wanted so badly to just be embarrassed and fearful of the joke; break all the friendship they built so she didn't have to deal with this extra person. Honestly, she hadn't regretted coming out to Collin... not until her dad... Since then, she tried to act 'normal,' which might have come off as superficial.

Collin grabbed her arm and pulled her to face him, "I didn't mean that to be offensive" he took interest in the scrapes on her chin again, much like he had at lunch. He grabbed it, tilting it up in a way Paige had previously thought only a mom could pull off. "So, bikes. You're really bad at riding them?" Collin observed, with a mix of genuine concern and friendly goofiness.

"Distracted driving," Paige responded, terse, recovering her chin, sniffling and increasing her pace. The last thing she needed was to explain this to one more person.

"Well its difficult living with a ridiculously hot roommate," Collin jogged to get ahead of her, Paige was about to speed up again. Once he could look her square in the eye, he began bouncing around, staying loose on his toes. Paige couldn't tell whether or not Collin knew she was crying, but his silliness managed to get her to smile. She got ready to swipe away punches. "Not gonna let some lil scrapes keep you outta the fight, are you McCullers?" He teased, was he talking about Emily or the club? Paige wondered.

"Listen, guy, I want to see you get punched in the face today, just as much as I did over break," Paige had gotten used to teasing Colin over break. She turned and took a left hook that he barely jumped back from.

"Whoa!" Collin was surprised, "a little close for comfort?" Paige felt a little guilty, knowing he was expecting her to go right, but Collin was still smiling. "This means I'll see you at club this week." He wasn't asking. "You need to blow off some steam."

"Ugh, yeah, I guess," Paige replied. "Colin there's something..." Paige had been meaning to breach the subject. Collin, Emily and Pru were the only people (aside from her dad) that she'd come out to. The short list she'd planned to grow was now a huge liability.

"I know," Collin answered, seriously. He must have seen the look on Paige's face. "Your dad won that nomination."

"Yes, and..." Paige hated this. It took her so long to finally trust someone, and now she had show all her paranoid asshole cards.

"That changes your life. I am well aware, and I want you to know that I'll do anything to help..." He bit his lip, trying to find a way to say this that wouldn't embarrass her, "keep you safe and feeling normal," he mumbled.

Paige let out a breath, this was almost satisfactory, but she had to be clear. She opened her mouth to reply.

"I wouldn't ever tell anyone about you liking girls," Collin helped her out. She finally seemed relieved. "I could even be yer beard!"

"Grossest," Paige replied, but she was smiling. She looked like a weight had been lifted off her back.

"I was just trying to offer my assets to a friend!" Collin replied, earning him a real punch in the arm, "Ow! Jerk," he smiled.

"Pig," she replied.

"I see how it is. I'm a punching bag to fight out your stress," Collin gave in, blocking and dodging a couple more punches.

They walked and talked together; Collin convincing Paige to go to the bookstore and buy headphones.


When Pru arrived at the coffee shop, there was no sign of Paige. She'd texted her back twice, with no response. However, Emily Fields was at the corner table, looking nauseatingly adorable degrees of pretty and distracted. Pru wondered if Paige already left because Emily was here.

Emily was staring at her book, but the letters weren't forming words and, when they did, the words weren't becoming ideas. Her knee was still bouncing. She berated herself, she couldn't afford to spend a term so hormonal and distracted. She had no time to pine. She felt a tickle in the back of her neck, a shift in the mood of the room, and looked up right at Pru, staring at her from the entrance. Emily resisted every urge to look down, and instead looked Pru right in the eye and forced a smile. Unfortunately, this caused Pru to come over to her table.

"Hello Emily, how are you?" Pru prefaced with false patience; she really wanted to cut to the chase, "Is Paige around?"

"Nope, she was going to study," Emily responded. Pru sat down. There was an unpredictability to Pru that Emily found unsettling. They'd been getting along well by the end of last term, but there was still this edge of competition between the girls.

"We were supposed to meet here to do just that." Pru noticed a hint of panic in Emily's eyes. Something had happened. She crossed her arms on the table and rested her chin on top. "She left me a weird message, like the world had just ended" Pru explained with some dramatic flair. Pru decided that was too concerned about Paige to give Emily a hard time at the moment. "She needs me, and now I don't know where the hell she is."

Oh, Emily figured out more of why she didn't like Pru. She felt the urge to explain to this girl that Paige only needed one girl. "I think maybe she talked to her dad." Emily tried to be helpful, resenting her own jealousy.

"Ugh, so its worst than I thought. She's probably jogging herself into numbness in some dangerous corner of the woods. Glad I skipped a date for this," Pru indicated her current seat.

Emily took offense. Was kissing Paige implicitly creating an open invitation for Pru to sit here? Emily shook off the thought, Pru probably didn't know anything about her and Paige. "You skipped a date?" Emily asked, looking Pru over. From what she knew about Pru, the girl didn't go on dates in her workout gear. Emily remembered the morning's Jacob weirdness. Emily would deny any thrill gainedl over Pru's potential pain when Emily asked, "Everything going alright?"

"Well, I'll admit, I'd already skipped the date. I was on my way to the rec center to do something useful with the time instead," Pru explained bitterly. "Things with Jacob haven't been great lately," Pru sighed.

Emily nodded, concerned. She was always willing to listen, but not really sure why Pru, of all people, would spill to her.

Pru went on, "At first, it was amazing. Better than anything. I mean, he met my family. My family likes him." Pru let herself sink into that feeling. "Then he answered my texts less. He's doing that asshole distancing dance."

Emily sighed, she knew that dance well, "You think he'll snap out of it?"

"I was hoping so. God, Idon't know. I'd talk to Paige about it, but she's been all distracted."

"Her dad's election?" Emily wanted to assert that she knew things about Paige's life, even if Paige wasn't telling them to her.

"Yeah, and before that other things," Pru looked Emily up and down pointedly.

Oh shit, she knows everything. Emily felt heat rise to her face.

"There she is," Pru nodded towards the window. There was Paige, barely bundled up for the winter, laughing into a hug from Collin. Emily clenched her teeth. "Well that explains why she took so long." Pru smiled. She knew that Paige wasn't attracted to Collin, but there was something that felt great about torturing beautiful, understated, turn-every-head-in-the-room Emily.

Paige finally managed a glance into the coffee shop to see something unexpected. There was her best friend, looking amused, sitting next to the girl she loved, looking unhinged.