Once Upon a Time, The End
How odd is it that you're born in a hospital, you leave the hospital, grow up, have a family, achieve your goals, whatever, and then, once you're old, you come back to a hospital to die. It's like, you think you're doing really well, and then, at the very end, you realize you really haven't gotten anywhere. You're right where you were when you were born.
The patient was Erica Marshall, eight years old, and she was terminal.
Life isn't fair. It never has been. It never will be. Some people have rich parents that pay for everything their whole lives. Some people's parents are shot to death when they're six.
Kutner wasn't bitter, but he also wasn't too proud to admit that it was just about the most unfair thing he'd ever experienced, up until recently.
Some people would die quickly, like his parents, like Erica Marshall. Some people would have drawn-out deaths, like Thirteen.
That wasn't fair. She was young, intelligent; she shouldn't have to worry about things like that so soon. Kutner didn't know very much about her, but nothing he knew about her was fair. As far as he was concerned, if anyone had a reason to be bitter, it was her. And yet, she wasn't, not outwardly, at least. She just pretended it didn't exist, which probably wasn't the best strategy either.
To Kutner, what they had was a mutual respect between two doctors, both of which admired what the other had gone through. It was no grounds for a relationship. It was barely grounds for a friendship. Some people, people like them, had gone through difficult times and come out the other end. Some people, like Erica Marshall, never would.
A young, otherwise healthy doctor dying of a terrible disease while a drug addicted punk musician was cured and sent on his way, that was the most unfair thing. A little girl lying in a hospital bed, on her last days, while a death-row inmate was cured and sent on his way, cleared of all charges, that was the most unfair thing.
And these two, whose lives were ridiculously unfair, had overcome them. Erica Marshall was in her room playing Monopoly with her parents and her brother and sister. Thirteen was in the lab, making sure they hadn't missed something, anything, and here was Kutner, in the hallway doing nothing.
Why was Thirteen working so hard to save this girl? That was what he had asked himself. Now he knew. Because she cared about the patient, that's what Cameron, or Foreman, or Wilson, or Taub, or Cuddy, or Chase would tell you, but Kutner knew better, Kutner and House. They knew that this little girl, Erica Marshall, was a younger version of Thirteen.
Once upon a time, Erica Marshall was born. Then, Erica Marshall died. The End. That was it. That was both of their lives. Once upon a time, the end.
Written October 6, 2008
