I don't actually have an excuse for the lack of updates. I ran out of ideas for a while and took a break...and the break lasted longer than I thought it would. I'm back now and have most of the end written out-I'm working on the epilogue right now. The entire thing will be uploaded before 2012.

This is the beginning of the end, just so you're aware of it.

The song is 'Plaisir D'Amour' by Joan Baez.

All content aside from the song, Phil, and the storyline (which belong to Joan Baez, me, and me, respectively) belongs to Valve.

Enjoy!


All of them had gathered together at the outside table near Sniper's camper. Pyro waddled out of the building and sat down near the rest as Demo staggered out and dropped onto the bench, nearly toppling the bench and everyone on it.

A chorus of shouts arose as Engie yelled over the noise, "Alrigh', take yer plate!"

The plates vanished almost instantly, leaving just three behind. Spy lazily took one, while Special and Engineer took the others.

"Sorry about the potatoes, they're probably cold by now…" Phil said with a sheepish grin.

"Nah, tha's alrigh'! Ah imagine tha' mah food's prolly the same by now, an' they're already finishin'."

"Zhey are quite good, and your food, Laborer," at which Engie scowled, "is superb, as usual."

"Why, thank ya kindly, Spah," Engineer said as sarcastically as he could muster.

"Thank you, Spy." This was said while suppressing a chuckle.

Pyro said, "Yes, the food's very good. Thank you."

Scout fell off the bench while Sniper drew his kukri and Soldier choked in shock. Engineer ran to help Soldier while Medic paled and Heavy jumped, catapulting Demo off the bench, making Medic run to check if he was alright.

"Thank you…Pyro."

The entire bench (except for Spy, who had continued eating through the commotion) turned and looked at her.

"A pity, I wouldn't 'ave minded two ladies to balance out zhis team of…gentlemen. A pleasure," Spy finally said.

Philippe chuckled quietly. "Told you."

Pyro laughed. "Guess you did, huh?"

Sniper abruptly sheathed his kukri and turned to help Scout up. Scout stared at Pyro as Sniper blithely continued eating.

Demo abruptly laughed, "Lad, why didn' ye say not a thin' befoore? An' Scout, ye, ye look like a wee fluffy sheep!"

Scout blushed and yelled, "Shut up!" as the others laughed.

"Tarnation, boy, why'd it take ya so darn long?" Engineer chuckled.

Solly coughed and just said, "MAGGOT! DON'T DO THAT WHILE PEOPLE ARE EATING! PARTICULARLY RIBS!"

Pyro just laughed and continued eating as everyone gradually settled down and started eating again.

The chatter came across crackly and incomplete on the television, but the figure staring intently made no move nor any signal that it cared.

"This girl will ruin everything I have put together…how did she even get there?" a voice hissed.

"But she will be easily disposed of…she has little combat training…she has required respawn already…" the voice continued, seemingly reassuring itself. "Nothing will be simpler…"

"Yes…nothing simpler…"


Special, after helping Engineer clean, stretched out in the living room. She looked over at the records that adorned the bottom shelf of the bookcase and decided to look through them. Since a good half of the sleeves were unlabeled, it required her to open each sleeve to look at the titles. Some she recognized, while some, she just had no idea about. One, however, caught her eye. All the center pictured was a flower, and the cover was completely featureless.

Out of curiosity, she put the record on.

Starting with a harp, the record then began to sing.

Plaisir d'amour ne dure qu'un moment

Chagrin d'amour dure toute la vie

The joys of love are but a moment long

The pain of love endures the whole life long

Your eyes kissed mine, I saw the love in them shine

And the song suddenly, abruptly stopped.

Philippe's eyes, which had drifted closed, shot open. The Spy was standing over the record player, and he seemed to be breathing heavily.

"Spy?"

He stood there, saying nothing.

"Spy? What's…what's going on?"

"It…it is nothing."

"Spy…don't lie to me."

"It is nothing! Do not pry into things that are nothing of your concern, foolish girl!" The yell echoed.

Philippe flinched slightly at these words.

There was nothing but silence in the room. Engineer and Soldier stood in the doorway as Sniper joined them.

"I see. I believe I will retire to my room now. Good night." The words sounded flat, dead. Philippe's face was a mask, impenetrable.

She walked up to her room and quietly shut the door.

"Spoi, that moighta have been the stupidest thing you've eva done. An' that's sayin' a lot, mate." Sniper then left.

Engineer looked at Soldier, who looked back at him hopelessly.

Spy slowly drew back from the record player and lowered himself onto the couch. He tilted his head back and placed his forearm over his eyes. Engineer slowly walked into the room, closely followed by Soldier in case Spy did something else unexpected.

"Please, just leave me be. Mon dieu, I am such an imbecile," Spy croaked.

"Spah…ya need ta apologize."

Spy did not move.

Soldier briefly considered yelling at the Spy but dismissed it. It wouldn't work…

"Fr-Spy, y-you need to apologize. It-It's not fair to Phil if you don't. Special was only trying to help you. I-I know y-you care about h-the private. S-So…show some kindness back."

Spy stared at Soldier in astonishment. His eyes were wide. The forearm slipped away.

Spy seemed to catch himself and promptly stood. He adjusted his vest without a word and swept out of the room.

Soldier looked at Engineer. "Was-was that good?"

Engineer smiled. "Ya did it, Solly."

The Spy, now cloaked to avoid embarrassment, walked up to Philippe's room. The door was open.

The door is open. THE DOOR-

He slid into the room to find a figure with a knife.

Without thinking, he tackled it. They landed with a thump on the floor as Philippe shot upright in bed.

She was greeted with a figure dressed in black lying on the floor, who was being assailed by an invisible force. The invisible force was revealed to be the RED Spy as his cloak fell away.

S-SPY? What…

Then the black figure, now able to see its opponent, gained the upper hand. It kicked Spy off, throwing Spy into the dresser and grabbed its knife. Spy lay prone as the figure moved closer and lifted its knife-

BANG BANG BANG

The assassin fell to the ground as Spy watched it. Philippe held her pistol in a shaking hand. She looked…angry, and perhaps confused. Spy noticed tear streaks and felt suddenly awful.

"Now I owe you, I believe." Spy immediately wanted to shut his mouth for saying something that stupid.

Philippe blinked at him for a moment. "Spy…" Spy immediately stared fixedly at the ground.

"Ch-I apologize. I was unspeakably rude and insulting earlier. I-"

"You saved my life. I don't think apologies are necessary. Though they are nice." Spy's head had jerked up to look at her the moment she spoke.

They stared at each other in silence for a moment until the door was flung open by eight well-armed men.

"Phil! Are…you…?" Heavy began.

"The fuck?" Scout asked.

"Boy…" Engineer warned.

"Are either of you injured?" Medic asked.

"I think I'm alright…I'm not sure about Spy…"

"I…appear to be in one piece."

"Who's the intruder?" Pyro asked after no more words were said.

"I have no idea…"

Spy finally looked at the intruder properly and his eyes widened.

"The assassin…"


The plot thickens!

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUN!

There might be a happy ending...sort of...maaayybe...

We'll see.

On a random side note, the actual storyline of this chapter (according to the doc manager) has 1,212 words. Make of it what you will. (According to Microsoft Word, however, it has 1,166.)