A/N: Okay, I'm just going to give it to you all straight out. I'm under a lot of stress right now so I might not be able to update for a while. I'm depressed so please no offensive review. Then again, I appreciate the reviewers for not saying disrespectful stuff so far.
Chapter 11: Sorrow
"What? But I'm just ordinary Amaya! I mean, Osaze. How am I supposed to help Malik-sama?" Amaya asked. She was shocked that Rishid would even suggest that Amaya go with them to Battle City. She didn't even know to play Duel Monsters. She had only seen some of the Ghouls challenge each other. Once in a while, she sneaked a peek at some of the rare Duel Monsters cards that Ghouls had stolen before.
"Osaze-that is, I meant to say, Amaya," he said, looking away from her confused gaze. She was about to ask him why he just called her by that name. "I remembered when you said that name. Remember? When I mentioned that you needed a male name so you could fit in with the others?" Amaya nodded though she knew that he couldn't see her do so.
"Rishid-san, what?" He cut her off with a raised hand to silence her, she quieted down immediately. All she did was look confusedly at him while he took out a bundled up blanket. Dried blood could be seen from some of the folds. She was almost afraid to see what was in there. Her breath was caught in her chest.
Why am I so afraid right now? I don't even know what's in there. But do I really want to see what's in there?
"Amaya...Do you feel strong right now?" he asked. His back was still on the frightened girl. A fit of shivers broke out all over her body. She wanted to lie down somewhere and rest her heavy eyelids. For some reason, her body felt so weak. Tears ran down her cheeks. She touched her tears with trembling fingers, Why am I crying for no reason?
"I don't know if I should show you this or not, but you should know. After all, it does belong to you," he said, solemnly.
"Rishid-san, you sound like someone you know died...I'm also crying for no reason. I don't get it," Amaya said.
"Before I show you, I have to tell you that it's extremely all right to cry about it. You can cry as much as you want but you have to be strong afterwards. If you want to help Malik-sama, you mustn't show weakness, do you understand?" he asked softly.
"Then please don't show me!" Amaya snapped. She looked down at the floor, trying to catch her breath. She could hardly breathe because of her rapidly pounding heart.
"I have to show you! It might be painful at the moment but in the future, it's only going to make you stronger!" Rishid yelled. In his mind, he kept saying that he shouldn't show her the baby's body. However, what if he was the mother? Wouldn't he want to know about his deceased baby? The world's a cruel place but you can't keep hiding under a blanket forever. He knew someone who had to learn that the hard way.
"No! You're scaring me!" Amaya cried shrilly. She was about to run out of the room but Rishid grabbed her arm. He handed her the bundle and pushed her on a chair.
After the attempted rape nightmare, she had another horrible one. She was sitting on a large bed with satin blue sheets, humming a soft melody when she heard a baby cry. She went to investigate the source of the noise since she knew that there was no baby in the entire house. She thought that it might've been coming from outside of the window. Perhaps it was an upset baby, who needed his/her diaper changed. She went to check just in case.
"Don't go," a deep voice said. The owner of the voice hugged her from behind.
"There's a baby crying. I know that it sounds weird but I think it's in the house somewhere. I'll be back soon," she said. He didn't say anything. Amaya could feel his arms unwrap from her waist. She opened the door and proceeded to walk down the dark and long hallway. When she reached a certain door, she turned the doorknob and entered. She saw Hoshi and herself, she was screaming in pain. Blood leaked onto the bed and herself clutching onto Hoshi screaming and pleading with him to help her end the pain.
Was that dream a premonition? She thought as her fingers slowly fumbled with the bundle. She could feel something with flesh inside the blanket. It wasn't moving, breathing nor did it have a pulse. She knew what was in there. An estranged cry came from her tight throat and hugged the bundle closer to her chest. One of the folds of the blanket loosened to reveal the top of the baby's baldhead.
"It died...I can't believe that it died...Rishid-san!" she called his name. Her voice was full of pain. She needed to hold onto someone, just something. Is this reality? Was she having another nightmare? She wished she was, then she could wake up and tell someone about it. That would've made her feel better. She knew that if she tried to pinch herself, she would feel minor pain. She wasn't dreaming like she hoped she was.
For the next seven hours, she cried and lied in bed with her limp baby. She didn't want to let go of it. She ignored Rishid when he mentioned burying it before putting his plan in action. She just stroked the baby's head, softly humming to herself and closed her eyes. Out of respect, Rishid left her alone and let her cry on his shoulder.
"Amaya...Amaya," he called her softly, gently shaking her limp shoulder.
Slowly, she turned her head to face him. "Hmm?" was all she said. Her hold on the baby had loosened and she made no indication of noticing. When Rishid looked at her face, he thought that she looked so pitiful in a sad way. Her eyes were pink and puffy, so full of sorrow. Some tears were stuck to her eyelashes, her nose was red and her lips were trembling.
"I'm sorry to show you but I thought that it was the right thing to do. Do you think that you're ready now?" he said. He didn't want to be so demanding but he had to do this for her sake. Her wish was to return home and now that he knew at least one thing about her...That one thing would also help his master with his goal.
Amaya turned to look at her baby again, whispering,"Good-bye, baby. Mommy has to go do something." She kissed its nose before covering the body with the blanket. She handed the body to Rishid with reluctance.
"I just realized, I never even got to name her," she choked.
"You can name her right now before she receives a burial," Rishid said, unwrapping the blanket to reveal the peaceful looking baby.
"I don't know wha-what I should name her. I probably would've loved her so much," she said.
"Ai, that's a suitable name. Since you love her so much," Rishid said, smiling at her.
"Yes, that is a very good name. Sayonara, Ai-chan," Amaya said, tearfully.
Rishid offered Amaya the bundle so she could hold Ai one more time but she shook her head. She waved her hand toward the door, signaling him to bury her. She didn't want to get herself attached anymore. As Rishid walked out of the door, Amaya threw herself on his bed and sobbed into the pillow. His previous words ran through her head, telling her that she had to be strong. Maybe she could go back home, tell her family about the baby or possibly find the father of the baby. They would come back in Egypt so they could pay their respects to Ai. This world is so unfair but I have to go on. I can't bring Ai to life so there's really no use crying. I guess I'll have to learn to 'duel' as they put it and be of some use to Malik-sama. I haven't done anything but cook and do the laundry. I have to stop crying now.
As a defiant gesture, she pushed herself off the bed and wiped at her eyes with her sleeves. "Okay, I can do this. Have to be strong," she said to herself in a strong voice. She breathed in and out slowly so as to calm herself down. Her stomach growled as Rishid came back in. He didn't mention anything about the burial. Amaya didn't ask. She knew that he didn't want to see her cry again. In order to change the depressing atmosphere, she asked about his plan.
"You don't need to ask any questions. You just need to promise that you'll do anything that Malik-sama asks and that you won't upset him," he said.
"Hai, Rishid-san," Amaya said, bowing.
He noticed she was tilting slightly like her body was weak. "Amaya, do you need to eat something right now? You look like you haven't been eating in days."
"No, I'm fine. Really," she said.
"I understand you might not want to eat after seeing..." Amaya's deep gasp indicated that she was suppressing
more tears and the urge to sob.
"I'm sorry...I guess it's because I'm a girl. They cry after seeing something like that especially..." she said quietly.
"No, don't apologize. I would cry, too," Rishid said. "If you would like to, you can rest for a few hours before-"
"No, thank you. I'd rather do whatever I can for Malik-sama. I would like to make you happy by making Malik-sama happy because you've done so much for me," she said, still bowing. Everything was quiet; all that could be heard was one final tear drop on the floor. One final tear she would have to shed in this room. She would be boarding on a yacht with Rishid and her master to Battle City.
"Very well. You've made your choice."
"And I'm sticking to it," she finished.
Rishid apologized with his head bowed because his plan involved using her. However, it was for the good of her and Malik. She said that it was all right because she thought the apology was for showing her Ai. Her hung head made Rishid guiltier though he knew he had to do it. He kept repeating to himself It's for their own good. Amaya would be able to go home and Malik-sama would be able to attain one of the Egyptian God Cards.
It was almost nighttime. The time when Malik decided to go to Battle City along with some selected Ghouls, Amaya followed Rishid to Malik's main chamber. Amaya looked down at the floor with crestfallen eyes. She wanted to follow Rishid's instructions of not upsetting Malik. It was hard to follow Rishid and looking at the floor at the same time. She bumped into Rishid's back when he stopped in front of the main chamber door.
"Remember, bow after you enter and eyes on the floor unless he instructs you to look at him," Rishid whispered. Amaya just breathed,"Okay."
"Enter," Malik's voice came from within the door. The loud creaking of the door meant that Rishid had opened it. Amaya followed as he entered the room and closed the door behind him. She bowed before Malik while her heart was beating in fear. When she raised her eyes a little bit, she could only see that same rod that he always holds and the lower part of the cloak that everybody had to wear. Rishid started to talk while Amaya stared at the floor, listening intently for any mention of the plan.
"Seto Kaiba?" Malik said questionably. Seto Kaiba? Amaya thought.
"Hai, Malik-sama. I have found his girlfriend," Rishid said, turning to Amaya.
"Rishid-san!" Amaya gasped as he used a knife to cut the top part of the cloak's fabric. "Gomen nasai," he whispered as he revealed her bounded up chest. Amaya blushed deeply out of embarrassment, looking miserably at the floor. She didn't want to see how Malik was looking at her. She was half-naked at the top but had a white cloth binding her chest. Goosebumps erupted from her skin when Malik unexpectedly lifted her chin so she could meet his eyes. Amaya trembled, maybe because of the sudden cold air or maybe it was because of him. Lack of food finally caught up with her and Malik caught her before she could fall to the ground.
A/N: The more exciting parts are in the next chapter. This story is going to be over in ten more chapters! Thanks to all the reviewers who inspire me to write more of this story.
