Iris

Bella's Point of View

"You're joking right; I know what he tried to do to Sam and Dean." I said.

"Yes well believe me when I say he won't be able to resist his own daughter." Crowley said. "Come now time to go see the Winchesters."

"No," I said standing up, "I don't want them around."

"Why not?" Crowley questioned.

"Why not; really?" I asked and he didn't respond, "I'm half angel, half demon; the two things they hate. I can't stand there and watch them judge me even though I had no choice in being born. You may not understand, but it would kill me to have them hate me."

"Well they already know so what's the difference?" he asked.

"The difference is, is that I haven't seen them. I don't want to see the look on their face of betrayal because that's what I've done." I replied.

"You love him." Crowley said and I stayed quiet, "You love Dean."

"Yea okay I do; so how do you think he is going to respond when he finds out who my parents are?" I asked. "My birth mom sent him to hell and Michael well we all know how that went down."

"Your point is?" he asked.

"Are you really that blind to the situation?" I answered, "Come on Crowley see it from my point of view."

"I do and I know for a fact that Dean cares for you no matter what you are." He replied.

"How would you know?" I asked.

"Because he looks at you the same way I looked at your mother." Crowley said quietly.

"How is it that you are a demon when you care so much?" I asked.

"Don't ever mistake me for human Bella; the only reason I am doing this is because I made Lillith a promise and I always keep my promises." He said. "Now since it's quite obvious I'm not going make you see my way tonight I suggest you go upstairs and get some rest." With that he disappeared.

I got up and walked up the grand staircase. I took a shower and when I laid down on the bed I had so many thoughts running through my mind. I couldn't face Dean after I found out who my parents were. There was a very small possibility he could forgive me for lying and being what I am, but the fact Lillith and Michael were my birth parents would be too much. Tonight I had admitted my feelings for Dean, but I couldn't go through another heartbreak; then of course there was the fact that I had sold my soul for the people I claimed to hate. I remembered being told about the Cullen's and pack like it was yesterday;

(Flashback four years ago)

Dad was out helping one of his buddies on a hunt and I was tending the bar. It was afternoon so we were pretty slow when someone appeared at the door and immediately I knew he was an angel;

"What do you want and don't try to coerce me I know what you are." I said.

"My name is Raphael and I come to give you some sad news." He said.

"What?" I asked reaching for my gun.

"Your friends the Cullen's and pack were killed by the Volturi." He said.

"You lie." I stated.

"Care to see?" he asked and touched my hand.

I saw what had happened; Aro had invited the Cullen's for a visit and he discovered they told me and that there was a pack of wolves. I saw the Cullen's being dismembered and then burned. Many of the guard went to Forks to try and tame the pack, but the pack fought back and were killed; along with Billy, Harry and everyone else that knew.

Raphael let go of my hand and smiled, "I told you." Then he disappeared.

I collapsed on the floor and started sobbing. I despised them for hurting me, but I still loved them and because of me they were dead. I picked up the phone and called Dad knowing what I was going to do.

"Hey Bells everything alright?" he asked answering on the first ring.

"Dad," I choked out.

"Bells what's wrong? Are you hurt?" he asked worried.

"Dad, Billy's dead; so is the pack and the Cullen's. They were killed because of me. Remember how I told you about the Volturi well they found out the Cullen's told me and then they found out about the pack. Everyone on the rez who knew is dead." I cried.

"Bells, it's not your fault." He said, "I'm on my way."

"No Dad I won't be here when you get back." I said.

"Bella what are you talking about?" Dad asked and I kept quiet, "Isabella Marie Swan don't you dare make a deal."

"I love you Dad." I said and hung up.

I grabbed the car keys and headed to the crossroads.

(end flashback)

I couldn't put Dean through any of this pain that my life caused. Everything I touched gets destroyed and I can't do that to Dean. I was about go to sleep when my phone rang and I answered it.

Dean's Point of View

I laid in bed trying to process all Belthazor had told us; Bella was half angel and half demon and I wondered who her birth parents were. Did Sam, me, or our Dad kill one of them? Why hadn't she ever told me; that's right I would be right where I am now….pissed off. I couldn't take it anymore and grabbed my phone dialing Bella's number;

"Hello," I heard her say.

"Bella," I said and the line was silent, "Bella are you there?"

"Yeah, I'm here Dean; what's up?" she asked trying to hide the panic in her voice, but I picked up on it.

"Where are you?" I asked trying to stay cool.

"Around," she replied.

"Bella don't bullshit a bullshitter; I haven't heard from you in three days now answer me." I said starting to lose my cool.

"I'm in bed Dean." She snapped.

I knew she wasn't going to give me a straight answer so I decided to go another route; "Why did you leave?"

I heard her sigh, "Because we had taken care of business and I wasn't needed anymore."

"You gonna give me some straight answers or should I just hang up now?" I asked not having the energy to play this game.

"Dean what do you want to know?" she asked.

"Why didn't tell me about you being half demon, half angel, or why you went to hell?" I asked and the line was silent.

After what seemed like forever she asked, "What do you want me to say?"

"Tell me the truth." I said.

"Fine here's the truth; I'm half and half. I've known since I was born, my dad knew, but no one else in our circle. There happy?" she asked.

"Do you know who your birth parents are?" I asked. When she didn't answer I pressed, "You do don't you."

"I just found out tonight." She said quietly.

"Who are they?" I asked.

"Dean don't make me say it." She said.

"No you listen to me; you've lied to me for years the least you owe me is some answers." I said.

"Lillith and Michael." She said and I clenched my fist.

"Lillith and Michael." I repeated through clenched teeth. "Are you sure?"

"Yea Dean I am." She replied.

"Jesus Christ Bella." I said slamming my fist on the table. "How could you keep this from us?"

"I don't know Dean maybe I was ashamed and afraid you…." She started but stopped.

"I would what Bella?" I asked. "Come on now is the time to tell all."

"Forget it Dean it doesn't matter." She said.

"You know what Bella it matters to me so why don't you be honest with me for once; put your angel side on instead of that demon one." I said and immediately regretted it. "Bella I didn't mean it…"

She cut me off, "No Dean I get it so don't worry about it or me. I promise you won't see my demonic ass again." She said and hung up the phone.

I started a string of curses as I headed to go talk to Sam. When I opened his door the only people in there were Cas, Sam (W), Jake, Damon, and Edward;

"We got a problem." I said and sat down in a chair.

"What's up?" Sam asked handing me a beer.

"I just talked to B." I said.

"And?" Damon asked.

"And I screwed up majorly." I said.

I told them what I said and Sam started in on me; "How could you Dean? She has had our back more times than I can count."

"I know alright; I screwed up." I said and finished my beer, "You're going to love this though; I know who her birth parents are…Lillith and Michael."

"Shit." Sam said and sat down with me.

"Wait as in the archangel Michael and the first demon Lillith?" Damon asked.

"Yeah." I said.

"Heavy." He replied.

"How could you say that to her?" Edward asked, "Damn it she cares about you."

"How would you know?" I asked.

"Because Jasper was reading her emotions and all that was coming from her to you was love and the fear of being in love with you." He yelled and I froze.

"Very good." I heard someone say and we turned to see Crowley. "Miss me sweethearts?" he asked.

"What are you doing here?" Cas asked.

"Well I had a feeling our darling little Bella was going to try and run so I decided to come and get you Dean before she disappears." Crowley replied.

"How do you know she's running?" Cas asked.

"Castiel let me explain something to you; I was there all through Lillith's pregnancy and when Michael or Lillith couldn't check on her I would." Crowley said.

"So she came to you." I said.

"Yes, now are you ready to pull your head out of your ass?" he asked "Or would you rather continue to make assumptions about Bella that are completely untrue because you have been given false knowledge?"

"What is the truth?" Sam asked.

"Well Michael and Lillith are her birth parents, she did die for you two and your families," Crowley said pointing to Jake and Edward, "but it was actually Michael who pulled her out he just disguised himself as Raphael. Now since I've given you the cliff notes version are you ready to leave?" he asked looking at me. "The rest of you can join us later, but right now he has some apologizing to do and also he is the only one that can get her to stay."

I didn't get a chance before the wind whipped and then we were standing in a large mansion.

"See your taste hasn't changed." I said.

"I'm a demon of culture Dean you should try it some time." He said and then stepped away, "I suggest you get ready she'll be coming down in 3,2,1." And he disappeared.

Just then I heard footsteps and saw Bella at the top of the stairs.

"What do you want?" she asked, "you know what never mind I don't give a damn." She said and headed for the door.

I stopped her, "Where do you think you're going?"

"Why do you care; remember I'm a demon." She sneered.

"Bella I'm sorry." I said "I screwed up and…."

She cut in, "And you're sorry. I don't want your apologies Dean, in fact I don't want anything from you. Just stay away from Dean it's for the best."

She pushed passed, but I grabbed her arm, "I'm not letting you leave Bella. I told you three days ago I loved you and that's still true; I always have and no matter what I always will. I don't care that you're part demon or angel; hell you could be a wendigo for all I care and I would still love you." I said and pulled her to me and smirked, "Besides I get the best of both worlds; naughty and nice, angel and devil. No wonder the sex is so good." I said and kissed her neck.

"Dean I'm not an angel; you stay with me or around me I'll tear you down. That's just what happens with what I am and I don't want to do that to you." She said.

"If I'm going to hell I can't think of a better ride than with you." I said. "Bella let me in; I'm not afraid of what could happen. It doesn't matter to me as long as I know I have you. So tell me what I want to hear."

I lifted her chin forcing her to look at me; "I love you Dean."

I picked her up and carried upstairs to the first room I could find and laid her down on the bed. We didn't waste any time taking off our clothes and then it was just skin on skin. Tonight was going to be different from anything we had ever done. Before this there was just sex; tonight I was going to make her mine by making love to her. It was true she half and half of what I hated, but that didn't matter because I've known her for so long that no matter what it didn't change how I feel. I knew the possible outcomes of this and it didn't matter because Bella was it for me. All that mattered was her here and now with me the rest of the world could burn as long as I knew she was going to be with me. We became oblivious to everything outside of this room and of the moment we were sharing.

AN: Okay I know this probably wasn't what you were expecting, but I was inspired by a song which is the title of this chapter. Review and please let me know what you think.

Goo Goo Dolls- Iris