A/N: Those of you who know me from my blog, Emily Rachelle Writes, probably already read this chapter. ;) However, for those of you who didn't have the opportunity to enjoy that early look, enjoy now! :)
Caspian
I exit the tunnels through the upper doorway onto the rock wall and sit with my legs hanging down over the edge. Gazing at the sky without truly seeing much, I struggle to make sense of the disaster that just played out in Aslan's tomb. The one thought I keep coming back to, is that of those who raised me. Am I more like Miraz than I thought? I cannot believe I came so close to betraying those I loved, just as he did when he murdered my father.
Professor Cornelius sits down beside me. I speak without looking at him. "Why did you never tell me about my father?"
He sighs. "My mother was a Black Dwarf from the Northern Mountains."
I look down at him. A dwarf? His physical appearance matches - the long, gray beard, the short stature. But how did a Narnian half-dwarf become tutor to the Telmarine crown prince - to me?
He stares forward through his tiny gold spectacles and resumes speaking. "I risked my life all these years so that one day, you might be a better king than those before you."
I look away into the sky, taking in his words. The events with the Witch consume my mind, and I look down in shame. "Then I have failed you." I have become so much like Miraz.
He turns his blue eyes up towards me. "Everything I told you... everything I didn't... it was only because I believe in you."
I turn to look towards him. He has heard of our history with the Witch, I know. Yet still he thinks me worthy of a throne?
His tone is gentle but serious. He means what he says. "You have the chance to become the most noble contradiction in history." He looks away. "The Telmarine who saved Narnia."
I turn my eyes back to the heavens and we sit in silence, watching the sunset. I wish I could believe him. I long to believe him. I want to save Narnia and the Queens and Kings. I want to protect Susan and her people, to become one of them, even. But I know I am not worthy... and I fear I am incapable.
Susan
I stand alone in the tunnel, leaning against the wall, far from the light of torches or noise of battle preparations or the conversations of others. After such a long few hours, I am alone.
Finally alone. Completely alone.
So I let the tears fall. I do not sob, or wail, or cry out. I am not one for hysterics, and I am also well aware of how easily a sound can echo through these tunnels to others' ears. My cries are silent and still, but I let them come.
Aslan has left us. Lucy and Edmund are still just children, even if they were adults once. Peter is too full of himself to be reliable. And Caspian...
Caspian betrayed me. Only a few hours ago, he betrayed me. He chose the Witch.
The tears fall harder, hot and thick against my face, spreading dark, wet shadows across the skirt of my dress. I cover my mouth with my hand and slide along the wall onto the floor. Pulling my knees towards me, I wrap my arms around them and sob into my skirt. The pain is unbearable, tearing the very fabric of my soul apart. I press my mouth into my knee to smother a scream.
How could he? How could he? How could he?
I love him. I loved him. I don't know which. My stomach churns and my breath comes in shudders as the tears continue to flow. How could he hurt me like this?
How could I let him?
I clutch my legs and rock back and forth, back and forth. I look up at the ceiling and send a silent cry to Aslan. How could you abandon us? Why call us back, just to let Narnia fall, to let everyone die, to let my family fall apart? Why did you let this happen?
Why did I fall in love?
Time passes. I don't know how much. The sobs and the pain continue to come in waves, crashing over my body before ebbing away for a moment's relief. Eventually they come more slowly, until finally I lay down and let sleep take over my body.
