SM owns twilight and all the characters..

I openly admit, I had a little trouble writing from RPOV, but the essence of what I wanted to get across, and the direction I wanted my story to go in, is still there; so I can't be too unhappy with it.

Please review, but no Flames...they burn too much :o(


Chapter 12

A Fate Decided

RPOV

What alternate universe had I accidently stumbled into?

I couldn't sleep…so I knew it wasn't a dream.

Could I really be sitting here, with Bella, discussing her options on how to join our family?

Sure I had told her, just last night, that I didn't detest the idea of her joining my family when she had asked my opinion, and I had meant it; but that didn't mean I loved the idea, and I certainly never thought I'd be encouraging her!

There was no reasonable explanation for my ludicrous behavior, except that somehow over the last hour I had actually started liking Bella…

Unbelievable!

When I had first dragged her upstairs to talk, I never imagined the things the we would discuss or how pivotal this day was going to be; I had just wanted to give her a piece of my mind. I was going to tell her to grow up and stop acting like she was still the teenager that had irked me so much, five years ago.

But, that was before I knew of the heartache and loss that Bella had suffered over the past five years. Listening to her talk, watching her cry; it had softened my intolerance of her and had forced me to admit that Bella had changed.

She was not the same young girl I had met in Forks, she was a woman now; she had grown up and she had experienced the harshness of life, the heartache of loss, and the unfairness of unanswered prayers.

I understood the sorrow Bella felt, not being able to have children; it was a pain that I was all too familiar with. Her admission to me about her miscarriages and her inability to carry a child, had given me a chance to identify with Bella, and to feel a connection with her for the first time. Both of us mourned the children we could never have.

I heard it in her voice; I saw it in her face and in her body language- in the way she clutched that pillow like a life preserver… the past five years had not been kind to Bella. Despite her best efforts to live a happy human life, fate seemed to have stepped in, to dash each of her attempts. The sadness and defeat in her voice made it sound like she was tired of fighting such a hopeless battle, given there were no spoils to show for it.

The failure of her marriage, the loss of her babies, the death of her Father and estrangement from her Mother…it all had taken its toll on Bella. She was hurting- the thought of losing Edward again… was pushing her to breaking point, right in front of my eyes.

The basis of Edward's argument for keeping Bella human, had always been his fear of stealing away her chances of a happy life; a human life filled with children and grandchildren; but considering everything I had heard- becoming one of us was going to rob Bella of nothing; if anything it might enrich her life.

Bella had nothing left to lose or to give up really…only my brother and my family. Becoming a vampire, would offer Bella more of a life than what she already had; it would allow her the chance to have a family again, to be loved and to give love in return, completely and freely.

Bella becoming a vampire would mean my brother could finally have the mate he wanted, the mate he needed. He had spent too many years alone and too many years separated from her already.

It struck me like a lightning bolt while we talked about Edward's unwillingness to change her;

Someone else in the family had to do it.

Someone else had to step in, and put an end to the torturous pain that being separated would cause Edward and Bella. Neither would survive such a separation again.

Someone had to give them the solution to their conundrum.

That someone was me!

So I had pointed out to Bella, the very obvious fact that Edward was not the only vampire that could administer the bite that would transform her. As soon as she realized what I was saying, I watched the light return to Bella's eyes, the spark of hope reignited.

I watched as Bella thought through what all of this meant.

I waited, a feeling of nervousness descending over me, at what I suspected was about to happen.

"Rose"

"Yes Bella?" I answered hoping my voice didn't reveal my nerves.

"Can I ask you a favor" she asked calmly, showing no outward signs of being nervous or indecisive herself.

"Sure, what can I do for you? Do you want me to go and find Carlisle for you" I asked kindly, suggesting fetching Carlisle in the hope that he would be the one that Bella would want to change her; he was the obvious choice, he had done this before, he was practiced and controlled.

"No Rose, I don't want you to go and find Carlisle." She replied quietly, her eyes never leaving mine.

"I can give Alice a call if you want…unless she's already on her way here." I offered; figuring maybe it would be Alice that she would choose. If that was the case, then Alice was probably already on her way thanks to a vision.

"No thanks Rose. Um…Rose, can you just let me finish what I am trying to say?"

"O….k" I was getting nervous now. If Bella didn't want Alice or Carlisle to do it, that only left Jasper, Esme and me. I was pretty sure that Jasper wasn't really a candidate seeing as he had already tried to kill Bella once before, so that left me and Esme.

Please, please, please let her ask me to go and get Esme!

"Rose…will you do it? Will you bite me…will you change me?" she asked simply, looking me directly in the eye.

"What?" I blurted out in shock. I was the last person I thought Bella would want to have sink their teeth into her.

"Rose will you bite me? Will you be the one to change me? Please" she asked again, this time a slight pleading tone had entered her voice.

"Um Bella, I don't know if that is such a great idea." I answered honestly and slightly panicked. I didn't think I was the best choice for this. I was a close last with Jasper in my opinion; as far as suitable candidates went.

"Rose it was your idea. Besides… I trust you." She smiled at me, her voice full of sincerity.

"Why me? Someone else should do it." I found myself choking the words out. I didn't trust me! Why did Bella think I could do this, when I had massive doubts?

"I think you can do this Rose- plus if I miss this chance…I know I won't ever get another one. Edward is out of the house, he can't hear us, and he can't hear your thoughts; he doesn't know what we are planning. We both know if Edward had any inkling that we were thinking of doing…he would do everything in his power to stop it; but he can't stop this from happening when he isn't here. Rose this is the perfect opportunity. Rose this is the only opportunity." Her voice was more urgent sounding now, as she pleaded with me, trying to give me reasons to agree with her request.

"Bella, I don't think I can…I might…kill you."I mumbled.

I knew she was right, that it was a matter of now or never, but that did nothing to ease my concern that everything could go horribly wrong. I knew that it wasn't going to be as simple as I had made it sound. It was going to involve much more, than just a simple bite.

"No you won't Rose, you wouldn't let yourself kill me… it would hurt Edward too much and you wouldn't be able to live with yourself." She said simply.

Bella was so calm; it was as if she discussing having her nails trimmed, rather than being injected with venom, that would stop her heart beating, and turn her into a blood thirsty vampire.

I wished I could share in her confidence and resolve.

I watched Bella thrust her hand towards my face. "I'm ready Rose…whenever you are." She smiled.

Despite all the risks, Bella was willing to put her faith in me, and her fate in my hands.

Staring down at Bella's wrist, hearing her request still echoing in my mind; I struggled to make my decision. Bella was right; this was the perfect and probably only time that the opportunity would present itself. Edward could be back any moment. I had to make a choice.

I could end all the fighting…

I could make my brother happy; I could give him everything he ever wished for…a future with Bella.

I had to do this… and I had to not kill her…somehow.

There was no other choice that either Edward or Bella could live with.

Grabbing Bella's warm, soft hand in mine, I lifted it to my mouth, my eyes never leaving the inside of her wrist, as I bought my lips down on the delicate skin and broke the soft, warm surface easily with my sharp teeth.

There was no turning back now…

Bella's warm blood flowed out swiftly to meet my lips, shocking me with its unbelievable flavor. Her blood was like nothing I had ever tasted before.

Having never drunk human blood, it was a completely new taste sensation in my mouth. One I enjoyed. It was so much better than any animal blood I had ever sampled, sweet yet robust, with a delicate balance of flavors that no animal blood could possibly match.

I heard Bella whimper in pain, as my venom began to work its way into her system, incapacitating her, just as it was designed to; making her forget any attempts to struggle or flee, due to the immense searing pain it caused. She whimpered again and I heard my name escape her lips, "Rose…stop." She pleaded.

But I didn't know if I could stop. I didn't know if I could fight the side of me that Bella's blood had awakened. I was killing her; draining her of her blood; blood that had a pull so strong, it was hard to resist.

"ROSE!" she screamed and I looked up into her wide eyes, as she pleaded with me, to break my hold on her, and to spare her life.

In that look I saw what I needed to give me the strength to fight the monster that had been awakened from deep within me.

I saw the love of my brother's life. I saw the friend that Alice cared so much for. I saw the bumbling klutz that Emmett and Jasper enjoyed teasing and having around. I stared into the eyes of the daughter, that Esme and Carlisle saw in Bella.

I could not steal her from them.

I could not hurt them that way.

Using all the strength I could muster, I fought to stop the madness that Bella's blood was causing. I broke my grip on Bella's arm, thrusting her away from me, throwing her clean off the bed and onto the floor. I heard her skin tearing loudly, where my teeth were still holding their ground, refusing to loosen their grip on her.

I heard the crunch of bones shattering, as she hit the floor. I had probably just broken several bones in her body with the force of my blow; but that was the least of Bella's problems.

I had to escape, before I surrendered again to my bloodlust. I didn't dare look at her crumpled, bleeding body laying on the floor, but I didn't need to look to know that she was now writhing in agony on the floor, as my venom spread rapidly through her system; her screams were piercing.

I ran from the room as quickly as I could, down the stairs, jumping in my car and gunning the engine, fishtailing down the drive; Bella's screams echoing in my ears. I didn't look back, I didn't breathe and I didn't stop driving, until I no longer felt the urge to go back to the house to finish what I had started.

I would not let myself return to that room, to kill the human girl; who was now in the process of becoming my sister.

I didn't dare pull over until I reached the outskirts of Seattle. Pulling into a mostly deserted parking lot, I didn't know what emotion to feel first; so many thoughts and feelings were rushing through my mind.

I felt an incredible guilt, at the thought of how dangerously close to losing control and killing Bella I had been. I had almost ruined everything.

I felt joy at the same time, in the knowledge that I had been able to stop myself, and leave Bella alive.

I was on a rollercoaster ride of emotions as more feelings coursed through me.

Feelings of happiness bubbled inside of me; I had done what Edward had been unable to. I had just given him Bella…forever. Right now she was being transformed; my venom flowing through her body, changing her. Bella and Edward would finally get the future that both dreamt of…because of me.

Mixed in with my happiness was a lingering concern; I had just spilled blood from a human, our treaty with the Quileute in La Push was forever broken; we could never return to Forks.

Adding to my worry was the fact that I had now tasted human blood. Would that change me? Would it make my commitment to our lifestyle weaker?

My vanity surfaced suddenly, and I was scared as to whether my eyes had taken on a red tint, in evidence of what I had done? Did I now look like a monster? Did my face now reflect the vampire that I was, rather than the beauty I was used to?

Staring into the rear vision mirror, I inspected my eyes. I was relieved to see that they were not glowing crimson like I feared, although the usually golden color of my irises was now a darker richer gold, tinged with a hint more red.

Thinking back to how hard it had been to stop myself from draining Bella of her blood, I found a new level of respect, for what Edward had gone through in the ballet studio when he had sucked Bella's blood clean, after James had bitten her. I knew now, just how difficult stopping himself from killing her must have been. I had come so close to failing myself, and her blood was more potent to Edward than it was to me.

My greatest emotion though, was fear. A crippling fear was washing over me, at the thought of how Edward would react to what I had just done, how my whole family would react. What would they think of me now? Would they hate me for what I had done? Would they forgive me? Would they understand why I had granted Bella her request, when Edward had made his refusal to do so, and his intent to keep her human, so well known?

I only hoped that they would give me the chance to explain what had happened before they jumped to conclusions. It would be too easy for my family to believe that I had lost my temper and lunged at Bella, rather than the truth…that she had asked me to do it. I barely believed the truth myself.

I sat in the parking lot for hours, experiencing each high and low of every emotion I was feeling; thinking about the pain that Bella was now enduring, imagining the shock that my family would feel when they returned home to see what I had done.

I hoped and prayed that Edward would hear me out when I returned home…I didn't expect a thank you, but I did hope he wouldn't want to tear me apart. If he tried to harm me, I knew that Emmett would die attempting to protect me.

I could not stop myself from further considering how my actions could cause the complete destruction of my family; pitting brother against brother, vampire against vampire; in a fight to the death. The thought of the possible fallout, due to my rash decision, made me shudder.

What had I done…?


BTW~ I think Rose is the most misunderstood character of the twilight series.