A/N: I apologize for the long a/n but there are a few things I need to warn you about this chapter. First of all, I want to apologize for not posting on Monday and let you know that from now on I will be posting on Wednesdays. I have had some changes at work and will need to utilize my weekends for writing and then have my lovely Beta, Cintia, work her magic. I am sorry for changing things around, but this will hopefully help me write better and with less pressure.
Also, I want to warn you that this chapter is quite intense. Rape is mentioned (Bella's incident) so please do not read if this topic makes you uncomfortable. I also speak a bit more about Edward's illness and how he was bullied as a kid. I use the word retard, in order to demonstrate how deeply hurtful that word is to him and for anyone that suffers any illness that makes them look or act different than normal. Unfortunately, it is a very common word that should be banned and most people don't consider the effect it has on the person. I intend to demonstrate that here.
Last, I think there is some confusion about Edward's disease. In an effort to not mention a specific illness in which I don't have enough medical knowledge, I did not want to give him a specific diagnosis, but did refer to the fact that he was considered to have some form of Autism or Asperger's. He is highly functional but still struggle with making emotional connections and managing his own emotions, which sometimes lead him to act weird or out of the normal. He is an actor, but does not get involved in the "social" part of it. To him is just a job before he gets to play with his own camera and his brothers have helped him navigate through it all, adjusting to his needs.
Thanks to Cintia and Dishie for their invaluable help and support.
I hope you enjoy the chapter and take a moment to review.
"Bella, baby, what's wrong?" he asked panicky.
"You don't want me," I said quietly, my chin resting against my chest.
"Bella, baby, please don't ever say that again. There's nothing I'm ever going to want more than you. You are my life now."
I felt my heart swell with something that made me feel warm inside, yet my doubts implode at the same time. I knew at that moment that Edward Cullen was mine if I wanted him. Now, the question is, can I allow myself to finally let someone in … to let Edward in?
EPOV
I knew I shouldn't have listened to Alice. Bella was really upset, and the fact that she thought I didn't want her left me reeling. I needed to convince her that I loved her, regardless of her issues, but I had no idea how to do it. I was terrified of pushing too hard and scare her away. However, I knew that if I continued to let her starve herself, I would be an accomplice, to her disease, just like Carmen. I wanted her healthy, but I didn't want push her away. It was a very thin line to walk, but I knew that I had no other choice but to walk forward.
"Bella, baby, listen to me, ok? I didn't mean to offend you by asking you to share my food, and it makes me sad to know that you don't trust me. I know we don't know each other very well yet, but I've tried really hard to show you that you mean the world to me. I can't explain to you why or how I can feel so strongly for you, especially when we have spent so little time together, but there is no doubt in my mind that I love you. That is for certain.
"When you are near, I feel a strong pull towards you. I feel your sadness in the deepest part of my soul. It's strange, I know, but it's true nonetheless. I know that you feel me too … I can sense it, so please don't deny it.
"My father believes that you are my soul mate because he and my mother shared a similar bond. I remember that my mother always knew that my father was calling her even before the phone rang. They would always know when the other would walk into the room without looking. Ms. Cope used to tease them by saying they were like two planets, always gravitating around each other. If he moved, she moved. It was truly amazing.
"I don't know if soul mates exist or not, but I know that I can't be without you. My life didn't make sense until you came along. It's like I just only existed. I guess what I'm saying is that if you were to die, I would die right along with you. Maybe not physically, but my soul wouldn't be the same without you. I would become an empty shell. Like a walking corpse. Please, Bella, I am asking you, please try to save yourself.
"I only asked you to share my food, so you would become healthy and happy again. I want to see you happy, and if you're happy, I'm happy. Hopefully, someday, you will want to marry me. I think we would make beautiful children. I want to give you the world. Please let me help you."
Bella's eyes grew wild, and she became very anxious as I spoke. After a few torturous moments of silence, she threw her arms around me and began to cry.
"Please, Edward, don't say that! I'm nothing, okay? Nothing! You can't think of dying, even if I am gone. You have a family, a successful career, and you are a good man. Even if you are a little different, the world needs you. The thought of seeing you suffer hurts me so much that I can't even think straight," she said forcefully.
"Bella, I …"
"Please! You need to let go of the notion that you can't live without me. I don't deserve it. I will neverhave kids. I'm already a walking corpse, I am nothing. I don't care about being healthy or happy. In fact, wish I could die, but that would be too easy." She pulled away from me and back into her shell.
Hearing her talk that way about herself made me angry. How can she think she's nothing? I love her. How can she not see that?
"Bella, stop it! I don't want to hear you say you deserve this. Don't you see what it does to me when you talk this way? Don't you understand how important you are? How important you are to me? I replied in a raised voice.
"I know you feel this way because you survived your parents' death, but that doesn't mean you are a bad human being. You are the physical embodiment of their love, if you, destroy yourself, you will be killing the result of their love. You are also the embodiment of my love. Losing you will hurt me too.
When Bella got up to leave, I knew if she walked out of this room, she would leave for good. I would lose her. So before she could walk away, I pulled her into my arms and held to her tightly to me, wishing I could get through to her and hold her to me forever and never letting go.
She fought against my arms, but I held her to me even tighter. I wanted her to feel me. I was scared that, if she walked out that door, she wouldn't come back, and I would lose her forever. Just the thought of that was painful. The thought of her going back to Carmen to let herself die overwhelmed me, and tears pooled in my eyes.
"Baby, please don't do this. Please? I will make you smile every day, I promise. Please give us a chance!" I begged with a broken voice.
"Edward, don't cry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I am so sorry," she pleaded. I could hear the determination in her voice. She was going to leave.
"Bella, it's okay. Let's eat our dinner, ok?" I pleaded. "Let's just pretend nothing happened" I said.
"Edward, I don't think that's a good idea. I shouldn't have let you get close to me. I don't know what I was thinking. This is wrong, Edward. I can't be with you as a wife. You deserve better. Please let me go, all right? Thank you for the beautiful dinner, but this isn't going to go anywhere," she said, as she waved her feeble hand between us.
I felt like the world had stopped turning. She was leaving. She did not want me.
Without thinking, I leaned over and kissed her. I put all my love and passion in that kiss, hoping that she could feel my love, my need for her in that one, single kiss. It was a desperate attempt to keep her, and as pathetic as it was, I had to try.
Her lips were soft, like tiny feathery pillows beckoning to me. She gasped at the contact, but melted in my arms, letting me taste her. I felt the current of passion flow between us for a few heavenly moments until she suddenly stiffened and shoved me away. She then ran to her room, leaving me alone in a room full of flowers and a cold dinner.
Sitting there, contemplating the fact that my heart had just been shattered into a million pieces, I tried to make sense of the pain. I even attempted to get acquainted with it, knowing it would forever live within me, but I couldn't. All I could do was breathe shallowly and repeat the words 'you lost her' over and over again.
After sitting alone for what seemed to be forever, Jasper came into the room, just sitting there with me in silence, offering me his support I must have fallen asleep at some point, because when I woke up, I was sleeping next to Dorito. My dad and Jasper were sitting nearby, wearing somber expressions.
"Where's Bella?" I asked, worried that she had left while I slept.
"She's sleeping. Esme and Alice are with her," my father replied.
"She is leaving me, Dad," I stated, somehow hoping that he would deny it.
"Edward, I'm unable to disclose why, but it's better for Bella if you stay away for a little while. She needs some space to think. I don't think she'll leave, but she doesn't think it's a good idea for you to be around her. Please respect that, or Esme will have to put her in the hospital," he explained, worry etched on his face.
"What? Why? What happened?" I asked, both worried and hurt by the request.
"She's okay, Edward. She just needs some time to relax and calm down," he soothed.
The whole conflict of interest thing had always seemed silly to me, but when seeing my father's saddened expression, it made complete sense. I sensed that he knew something about Bella, and that information would clear things up for me, but he simply could not tell me. My dad was a man of principles, and he was not about to destroy his beliefs, no matter how much it hurt him.
"Perhaps you should try to work a bit, Edward. It will help you relax, and you really need to catch up. I have left some scripts for you to read in your office, as well as a packet Jenks sent today. He said it was urgent for you to review," Jasper said.
" The woman I'm in love is going to leave, Jasper. She's completely shattered by something that no one wants to tell me about. She's leaving my house and going back to living like a god damn zombie, rotting away in a dark room, or in a mental hospital, and you want me to work? What the fuck?"
"Edward, please calm down," Dad said, lacing his words with a warning tone.
"I don't want to piss you off, Edward, but I think you should try to get some distance and figure things out. You are so intense with this girl, and you don't even know her that well. Perhaps being occupied will help you get some perspective. Don't get me wrong, I like Bella, and I feel bad for her and for you, but I am not going to let you destroy your life for someone who doesn't even want you around," Jasper replied.
"Jasper, I can't focus on anything else but Bella right now. I need to get her to talk to me. I feel like there is this big secret that's keeping her away from me, but no one wants to tell me about, so I am fighting blind. If leaving this house makes her happy, I guess I'll have to let her go, even if it fucking kills me. I just don't want her to leave out of fear of some unknown thing," I replied acidly.
My dad's expression went from worry to pain. He was truly torn about not being able to tell me what was happening. His attitude only confirmed the fact that there truly was something more besides her parents' murders, and whatever it was, it was really bad. The confirmation only made me even more concerned.
"Edward, I told you at the beginning not to get too emotionally involved, because there was a large probability that Bella would not let you in. She's … damaged, and that may never change. You knew this and still you pursued her, so now you just have to learn how to cope with the consequences of your actions.
"I understand your love for her, Edward, I swear I do. I believe she's your soul mate, but unfortunately, her soul has been shattered, and she may never be able to heal it. Perhaps you weren't meant to be together in this life, Son, please don't let this end you. You have a lot to lose."
"So, what, Dad? Do I just give up the only person who has ever made feel something? The only one I have felt inside? Should I just let her go back to that fucking hole and let her rot, pretending that I never met her? Hell no! She needs me, I know she does. I can feel it, Dad, and nothing will keep me from helping her. I don't give a damn about anything but her. She. Is. My. Life. And if I can't get her out of that fucking hole, I plan to join her there, even if she doesn't want me. I will be with her in the middle of hell, and nothing will to stop me."
I was so angry at everything and everyone at that point. I was angry at my Dad and Jasper for implying I should just move on and get 'distracted' from Bella. I was angry at Bella for not telling what was going on, and I was angry at myself for being so fucking stupid and let Alice convince me to push Bella to eat.
It just made no sense for her to go to the extreme of leaving the house because I asked her to eat a plate of pasta. Something inside me warned me that there was something else behind her actions, and not knowing what it was frustrated me to no end.
Not wanting to continue the argument with my father and brother, I walked out of the room. It was hard for me to understand why people felt and did things a certain way. The way my father and brother were reacting seemed to be cold and uncomprehending, but I knew they loved me, so that didn't add up. Why were they acting like this if they loved me? Everything was so overwhelming, I just needed to get out of there and think.
I hobbled my way to my studio, searching for the only thing that ever calmed me, my music. Music made sense to me. I could feel music, and it always soothed me. I desperately needed to get lost in its magical notes and get away from everything.
Sitting down on the bench, I began to play, my fingers running all over the ivory keys. I felt my anger flow, and soon it had been turned into a frantic harmony. It was raw, and its thunder could be felt all over the room making me shiver with despair. Right in the middle of the turbulent notes, I found my Bella, fearful and sad as always, but as beautiful as the notes that surrounded us. Inside that world, I could feel the wounds of fear in her ravaged soul, but I could also feel her love. Her love for me flowed into the music, creating an exuberant descant that rose with my hope and dipped with my anguish at losing her. She was so close to me, beckoning me to reach her, but drifting away in a sea of fear and somber notes. I frantically reached for her, letting the music guide me. The melody then turned melancholic, translating my desolation as I saw myself lying in a cold hospital bed, holding my beloved. I felt the sharp pain in my heart as her empty eyes stared at me, reminding me that I had lost her, and that I had not saved her, the music quieted after that thought.
XX Broken XX
My eyes fluttered open, and I woke up realizing that I had fallen asleep on the piano. Looking around the room, I found Emmett sleeping awkwardly on a small couch, snoring and sporting a massive erection. Not the sight I wanted to wake up to, but of course Emmett being Emmett, he was likely to be dreaming about one of his many ladies.
"Rosalie," he mumbled.
What? Why was he dreaming of Rosalie and having that reaction? Shaking my head at the thought, the events of the previous night came rushing back to me. Once again, I was gripped by the fear of Bella's departure. For the millionth time, I cursed the crutches that kept me from running out of the studio in search of her.
When I decided to make my way to Bella's room, I found Alice sitting on the stairwell. Her shoulders were slumped, and I could see her shaking. She was crying.
"Alice, what happened?" I asked, unable to rein my fear. Had something happened to Bella?
"Oh, Edward!" She bawled as she threw herself in my arms.
"Shh" I said, rubbing her arms. "Alice, what happened? Are you upset because of Bella reaction?"
She sobbed while shaking her head affirmatively.
"I am so sorry … I didn't think you would … I shouldn't have … I am sorry!" she stammered.
"That I would what, Alice? What did I do? What shouldn't I have done?"
Why did Alice imply I did something wrong? Why couldn't she tell me? I was getting tired of the guessing games, and it was time someone told me what was going on.
"Tell me, Alice!" I ordered, shaking her small frame in desperation. "What is going on? What happened to Bella? What aren't you telling me?" I shouted.
A fresh wave of sobs was her only response.
"I thought you were my friend, Alice. You talked me into to do something I didn't want to do in the first place, and now what? What happened to her, Alice? Tell me!" I shouted angrily, shaking her again.
"Get your hands off her!" Jasper threatened as he ran down the stairs.
His eyes were wild, and I knew he was going to hit me before he did. When his fist reached me, I stumbled backwards, dropping the crutches as I crashed against the back of a sofa.
"You don't fucking touch her. Do you hear me? I'll beat the crap out of your sorry retarded ass if you do. She is mine!" Jasper roared.
His words cut me deep. He had never called me that horrible name. On the contrary, he had consoled me when I'd come home crying after the bullies at school had taunted me with it. How could my own brother use it now?
"Jasper don't, please!" Alice begged.
My father and Emmett appeared out of nowhere and rushed to keep Jasper from punching me again. He struggled and fought against them, his anger out of control.
I stood still. My own anger had ebbed after hearing his cruel epithet. I felt detached, like I was watching the scene in front of me from afar. I knew Jasper was angry and wanted to hurt me, but I didn't fear him. I just felt empty, void of any emotion.
"Jasper, what the fuck, bro?" Emmett scolded.
"He was hurting Alice!" Jasper spat, his breath ragged from the exertion of shoving against Emmett.
"I'm sorry," I mumbled while limping towards my office, needing to be alone.
The word 'retarded' resonated in my brain. Was that how Bella saw me? I mean, if my own brother, one of the people who I trusted and believed loved me the most, saw me that way, maybe Bella did too.
I knew I still acted a bit skittish around people, and I sometimes spaced out, especially when playing music or when I got upset, but I thought for the most part I did a good job at acting normal. Perhaps after I explained my condition she became repulsed by me. Perhaps she also saw me as something different, a "retard" too. Why did people think of me that way? I have an IQ of 145 for God's sake. People have no idea how much that word hurts. It makes me feel defective, worthless. The kids at school always used it to make me feel different, excluded. I still have nightmares remembering how they taunted me with it, just because I couldn't focus in class, or because I would occasionally flinch at contact.
I would have never thought that Bella could be judgmental. I thought she was my friend. Maybe I was wrong, just like I had been wrong with Tanya.
Tanya and I met on the set of a movie where she played my romantic interest. Her strawberry blond hair, perfect physique and bubbly personality gave her access to the cold world of Hollywood. She was always friendly and never attempted to overstep her role the way so many other actresses had. She always kissed me respectfully and never attempted to touch me beyond what the scene required, something I was very grateful for. She never said anything when I retreated, or whenever I had the occasional melt down. Most people disregarded my occasional symptoms as me just being an asshole full of himself, but she never judged me.
For me, the most difficult thing about acting was to intimately touch and be touched by others. It was something I have never been able to adjust to, but I have learned to deal with it, just like everything else. After all, my best role has always been pretending to be normal. Tanya's respectful demeanor made it easy for me to be around her. Soon, I found myself enjoying her company and laughing at her dry humor. My brothers encouraged me to pursue her, hoping I could experience romance. I knew they worried about my missing out on that important part of life, so I decided to try.
We went out on a few dates, and it wasn't long before the news of our 'romance' was splattered all over the tabloids. Because of that Tanya's popularity skyrocketed and soon it began to affect her. She transformed from a simple, uncomplicated girl from Alaska, into a spoiled brat. Our once enticing conversations about books and art quickly became endless, one sided litanies about fashion, designers and fame. She insisted on attending parties and social events, arguing that it would help with the promotion of our movie. Since I despised arguing, I would always give in to her desires, hoping that by pleasing her, she would go back to being the sweet girl she once was.
One day during one of those ridiculously crowded parties, a drunken woman sat on my lap and began to grind her bottom against my crotch. She was a mess. Her make-up was smudged, and her short skirt was stained with wine. She slurred into my ear that she didn't have any panties on and as disgusting as she was, my stupid dick reacted to her message, a fact that didn't go unnoticed by the people around us. They began to cheer her on, clearly enjoying the show. I was so embarrassed by the unwanted attention and the fact that an unknown woman was publicly groping me without my consent that I began to panic and twitch out of stress. I had no idea what to do. How would a normal person react to that? I looked around, searching for Tanya, and found her sitting at a table nearby snorting cocaine, completely ignoring the impromptu show I was one of the stars of.
While I sat there watching my girlfriend snort the white powder up her nose, the woman, encouraged by the cheers, began to vigorously rub against my crotch while moaning and massaging her silicone inflated breasts against my chest. I kept trying to push her away, but that only caused more whistles. The rubbing increased, and against my own will, my dick continued to enjoy it. When I felt the coil in my stomach begin to tighten, I pushed the woman away, not caring that her ass hit the floor.
I grabbed Tanya and demanded to leave, but she refused. Instead, she took me to an empty room and began to kiss me forcefully, lifted her skirt and rubbed her sex against my hard dick. I hissed at the contact, confused by the whirl of emotions, but finding her touch pleasurable. Emmett had already explained to me all the mechanics of sex, but Tanya and I had never gone beyond some heated kissing and groping. The only sexual experience I had was provided by my hand, and it was usually in the shower. I was curious to know how a woman's touch would feel. Tanya's seductive movements made it obvious that she wanted me to fuck her, so I did.
When she realized I was willing to move forward, she dropped to her knees and quickly removed my jeans. Once my dick was free, she her ran her tongue all over it, making me moan with pleasure. She gave me a few teasing licks but eventually engulfed my aching member. The wetness and warmth of her mouth were intoxicating, so I surrendered to the pleasure. I was moaning and panting with desire, almost reaching my climax, when she pushed me onto the bed and straddled me.
Thankfully, I managed to gather my thoughts enough to remember to use a condom. Pulling my wallet from my jeans, I removed the condom Emmett had given me and awkwardly rolled it on my dick while Tanya touched herself, moaning with the pleasure her own fingers were providing.
Once my dick was coated in latex, she pushed me back and straddled me again, but this time she guided my cock into her hot center. It felt warm and very, very wet. After lowering herself down until I was fully encased in her warmth, Tanya began to bounce while a torrent of profanities began to flow out of her mouth, making me grow impossibly hard inside her. She was wild and frantic; clawing my skin ad she fucked me.
Somewhere in the back of my mind I kept thinking that fucking Tanya was wrong, but I couldn't stop. Her body felt deliciously sinful, and my mind was unable to fight my desire. I flipped her over and made her get on her hands and knees while I penetrated her from behind. She felt even better, and I was able to enter her deeply, causing loud moans and even more cursing from both of us.
"Oh, Eddie, I'm … uh ... ahhh!" Tanya suddenly screamed while her sex strangled my dick so deliciously that I exploded inside her. My eyes literally rolled back in my head as I felt the blinding pleasure of my orgasm.
As soon as we were done, Tanya lifted off me and began laughing. Confused, I asked her what was so funny. The words that fell out of her mouth wounded me deeply.
"I can't believe I just fucked Rain Man," she giggled. "At least he knows how to fuck," she mocked, bursting into a high pitched laughter that drilled a hole in my heart and my dignity.
Humiliated, I tossed the condom in the trash, pulled up my pants and left her. I heard her laughter all the way down the hall until I shut the front door behind me.
I was so hurt that I was unable to stop tears from falling. I knew that the paparazzi were waiting outside, but I didn't care. I ran out and walked on the street, cursing myself for not driving my own car. Luckily, a cab stopped, helping me flee the endless flashbulbs and piercing clicks of the cameras.
How could my own girlfriend call me that? I had let her in! I thought she knew me, that she cared for me. I knew I didn't love Tanya, I never felt anything different for her than I normally felt for the people close to me, but I cared about her. I had helped her build a career and gave her everything she wanted, hoping that would make up for my inability to feel the love she deserved. I thought that meant something to her but obviously I was wrong.
The tabloids had a field day with the story. Some speculated that Tanya had broken up with me after I had cheated on her with a stripper. Others argued that I had found her in a compromising position with another man, and I was so crushed that I left the party crying. The whole thing was a PR nightmare for Jasper, but as with everything in Hollywood, it was forgotten as soon as the next scandal exploded.
I never saw Tanya again, but the memory of her still hurt. Not because I still cared for her, but because I felt betrayed. I had trusted her with the truth about my condition, and she had used it to hurt me.
I was so confused about Bella's reaction that I couldn't help but think that she could be doing the same thing. The idea that Bella may have rejected me because of my condition crushed me. Perhaps she thought I was Rain Man too.
Entering the sanctuary of my office, I shut and locked the door. Once inside, I felt numb. I wanted to forget the fact that I had shaken Alice, hurting her tiny arms as I did it. I wanted to forget that my brother Jasper, my best friend and confidante, thought of me as a 'retard', but more importantly, I wanted to forget that Bella did not want me.
I grabbed one of the bottles of tequila from the minibar Jasper kept in the office and began to drink directly from it. I had never enjoyed drinking, but the burn of the alcohol in my throat felt like soothing balm to the raw pain I felt. I couldn't drink it fast enough.
Sitting at my desk, I began to enjoy the lightness the alcohol had awarded me. I decided, it was a good time to clean and organize it, even though it was already in perfect order. I could hear someone knocking at the door but decided to ignore it. I focused on my task at hand, shuffling papers around, and taking things out of the drawers. I found the stapler very amusing and in a semi-drunken stupor, I had almost every paper on my desk covered in staples, a fact that had me laughing at myself , almost to the point of tears.
While searching for more things I could staple, I found a thick envelope with the word 'confidential' stamped on the front. It came from the office of Henry Jenks, the private investigator I had hired to search for Charlie Swan, the owner of the lost dog I had rescued.
After politely asking stapler to give me a minute to read it, I opened the envelope and pulled out its contents. There was only a letter and a folder. The letter was addressed to me and it read:
Dear Edward,
I apologize for not getting back to you sooner, but the results of the investigation you entrusted me led me to believe that you were getting involved in something potentially dangerous. When your brother informed me that Charles Swan's daughter was staying at your house, my fears were confirmed.
Because your mother was like a sister to me, I care about you as if you were my own family. I have watched you grow up and become a good and honest man. I'm sure your mother would be proud of you. It is because of my love for her that I decided to gather as much information on this case before I meddled in your life. I owe it to her to at least try to warn you of the potential consequences of your actions, but I promise to respect your decision, no matter what you choose to do with the information I am providing to you.
I have no idea why Miss Swan is staying at your house, but the fact that she is has me very worried. As you will see in the attached file, Ms. Swan survived a vicious attack by Marcus Volturi. He and his brother Caius are the leaders of the largest criminal organization in Italy, and they have ties with the two of the largest drug cartels in Mexico, as well as several gun trafficking organizations in the U.S. Charlie Swan was the head of an investigation that led to the arrest and eventual conviction of Aro Volturi, eldest brother of Marcus and Caius, who was viciously murdered while awaiting trial by a member of an enemy cartel.
Caius decided to honor his late brother by having Mr. Swan witness the brutal rape and murder of his fourteen year old child and his wife before torturing him to death. Something went wrong during the bloodbath because Miss Swan survived. According to the investigation files I have provided, Miss Swan witnessed the assassination of her father, as well as the multiple rape and subsequent murder of her mother, who died attempting to stop Marcus from raping her child.
After killing her mother, Marcus and his men proceeded to brutally rape Miss Swan. A pedestrian who heard her screams called the authorities, who immediately dispatched three patrols to investigate. Marcus must have heard the sirens and in his hurry to escape, shot Miss Swan once in the chest. The bullet missed her heart by a few millimeters, so she miraculously survived.
The police eventually apprehended Marcus, and Miss Swan's testimony was essential to his conviction. He was sentenced to the death penalty. He's currently awaiting his execution in a maximum security prison in Huntsville, Texas. However, his brother Caius is still free and it's believed that he will attempt to finish the job.
After Marcus was sentenced to death, the Texas police placed Miss Swan and her adoptive family in the witness protection program. Her name was changed, and there's no trace of her previous life. That's why I was surprised to hear she was staying with you and that you knew her real name.
It's likely that she's unaware of the threat against her life, or is not taking it seriously. I paid a large sum of money to gain access to this information I am giving you, but thankfully I was unable to bribe anyone that would give me information about her new identity. Her father was much respected, and the police take care of their own, so it was virtually impossible to trace her. Hopefully Caius is having the same luck as I did and will never find her.
Regardless, it is still dangerous for you to become involved in this situation, Edward. Like I said before, I am not aware of the circumstances that led you to Miss Swan, but please be aware that your line of work could lead the media to her and unintentionally expose her, creating a terrible threat to both of you.
Please forgive me if you feel I have overstepped the ethical boundaries required by my profession, but like I said, I love you and your brothers as my own and would have never forgiven myself if something were to happen to you because of my lack of action.
Sincerely,
Henry Jenks
My hands were shaking so bad I could barely hold the paper in place for me to read. Only two words registered in my head as I hurried to open the file attached to the letter. Brutally raped. Bella had been violated in the worst possible way a woman can be, and not only once but multiple times. My brain was frozen, repeating those two words over and over but failing to believe them.
I ripped the seal on the file, praying the contents had a way out of this nightmare. There had to be an error somewhere. Inside, there were several newspaper articles that described the crime and the many accomplishments of Sergeant C. Swan. Some of them had pictures of Bella and her mom. My baby looked so pretty, her hair was long and her face was full of innocence. One of the articles talked about Bella's many achievements and of her involvement with several organizations that aided the poor. One discussed how she had single handedly raised a thousand dollars destined to buy school supplies for orphaned kids by selling baked goods outside a grocery store.
I flipped through the different articles, eagerly learning about Bella's past. Once I finished with those, I found a file that contained most of the investigation of the crime. I skimmed through it, confirming what Jenks mentioned in his letter. There were several gruesome pictures of the crime scene, and although Jenks warned me about the graphic contents, I was unable to stop myself from seeing the pictures of the bodies of Bella's parents. They were horrible and made me want to vomit, but I forced myself to look. Bella had seen them, and so would I.
I then opened another file that contained the results of the rape kit, as well as several pictures of Bella's mangled body. According to the tests, she had been raped by several men, causing her severe internal injuries. Several men. The words caused me to explode in a fit of rage. I wanted to find those men and rip their heads off. How could they damage a fourteen year old girl that way? They had to pay for it. I wanted them to suffer immense pain. I craved their blood. At that moment, I wanted nothing else than to have them in front of me so that I could rip their skin off, piece by piece, until there was nothing left of their disgusting existence.
I was so angry that I felt something inside me snap. I began to picture those men in front of me, laughing at what they had done. They taunted me with images of little Bella writhing in pain and calling my name. Anger dominated every cell in my body, so I began to kick the furniture and throw everything within my reach at them. The thud of things hitting the walls became their heads cracking. The sound of shattering glass became bones being crushed, and the blood in my hands became theirs. I was an enraged animal, and nothing would stop me from crying out my pain and carrying out my vengeance.
A/N: Pheww! I am sorry for all the angst but I promise there are happy times coming. Sometimes you need to be shocked in order to react and I am sure Bella will react to Edward's pain. Don't you? They have a lot of things against them, but I think being each other's soul mates will help.
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