Chapter 11: "No"

A/N: Bonjour! I want to thank you all so much! Chapter 10 got the most reviews I have ever gotten, so that you all so much! You make it totally worth all the time writing this takes! So, here's chapter 11. I don't want to say much about it, but a lot of you have been waiting for this!

No one else has read this until now, feel proud. ;)

Disclaimer: Don't. Own. It.

Chapter 11: "No"

BPOV

36 hours. That's the amount of time we had left. No one was spared from the anxious tension that filled the house. Its despair was almost tangible, threatening to suffocate us. Jasper paced the length of the living room, desperate to form a plan. I understood that he was the expert on war in the family, having served in the Civil war. Alice was perched on the arm of one of the couches, tracking the decisions of the Volturi. So far, she hadn't seen anything of much detail, just Brandon deciding to leave for them. Rosalie sat on the couch beside Alice. She was filing her nails, not worried about the fallout this battle could have. Emmett sat beside her, his eyes following Jasper as he paced. Emmett had already given his suggestion, but Jasper had soundly rejected it.

"But Jasper, it's the easiest way!" Emmett protested once again. Carlisle and Esme were upstairs, trying to secure help from the clan in Denali.

"Emmett, for the millionth time, just attacking with no plan isn't the way to go! And it's not even a real plan!" Jasper snapped. He was too agitated to fix the uncomfortable atmosphere in the room. Edward sighed. He was sitting beside me on the loveseat, but there was plenty of room between us; another person could have probably fit. Carlisle and Esme descended the stairs.

"They can't come. Tanya is worried about angering the Volturi." Carlisle said. The room became tenser, if that were possible, and angers flared.

"After all we've done for them?" Edward asked angrily. Esme nodded her head sadly.

"We'll just have to go it alone." She said.

"I don't see what the big deal is; there are only three of them. I could handle them by myself!" Emmett boasted, flexing his large arms. Alice snapped out of her concentration to glare at him.

"We don't know yet!" Alice was having a hard time with this. The future was unstable, there were too many decision yet to be made.

"Maybe we should go hunting." Jasper suggested, "So we can be as strong as possible for the fight." The males agreed and we all left the house in search of game. Edward stuck beside me as I took down to deer. I just polished off the second one when realized that he was sacrificing hunting so he could watch over me.

"Edward, go hunt. They won't be here for another day and a half. I'll be fine." I assured him. He hesitated and started to protest but I silenced him with a glare.

"I'll be right back. What will you do?" Edward asked. I shrugged.

"I'll probably go back to the house and watch some TV; see if there are any big news stories about Italy." I said. We ran our separate ways; him looking for a meal, and me back to the house. When I arrived back at the large stone house, I was reminded of the first time I laid eyes on it. I had been so stunned at the house, with Brandon at my side. My life was so much simpler then, but I didn't mourn the loss. I felt…right… with the Cullen's. And Brandon didn't even compare to Edward. I cringed as I remember when I Brandon had first introduced us as companions. I sighed, I would never want another besides Edward, and he didn't want me back. Life was unfair.

I entered through the backdoor and went straight to the couches that we had just left unoccupied. I found the remote and started to channel surf. Nothing held my attention; there were no news flash about Italy and the murderous vampires that were coming to take me away. Obviously.

My eyes scanned the room, looking for something to pass the time, when my eyes rested on the black leather bound book that Esme had been showing me before. The one that Edward said I couldn't see. I broke my gaze from the book to look around the room, looking for others. There was no one. I got up stealthily, as if expecting someone to come in and catch me. There was no one, of course there wasn't, they were all hunting. I raised my hand and my fingers lightly brushed down the books spine. Once again, I looked around, looking for others. I eased the book off the shelf and took it back to my previous seat. I quickly flipped through the pages I'd already seen. I stopped at the last page I'd seen. This is it, I thought. Why am I so nervous? I was doing nothing wrong. I sucked in a deep breath and flipped the page.

"No!" Someone called from the back door, but it was too late. My throat constricted and I dropped the book as I fell onto all fours. A fierce aching pulsed in my head as I saw myself staring up at me from the pages. There I was, with Edward's arm around my shoulder. It was what I would have looked like as a human, with large brown eyes instead of the red or golden one's I was accustomed to. Memories assaulted me as my life returned to me.

"So how does it fit in with the Cullens? Are they like the cold ones your great-grandfather met?"
"No. They are the same ones."

"I love you"
"You are my life now"

"His eyes were green?"
"Yes"

Conversations took place before my eyes with people I didn't remember. Names flew past my eyes, reacquainting me. Jessica, Mike, Angela, Jake.

Place's I'd never been before unfolded before my eyes, giving me the names of places once forgotten. The Meadow, Forks, Arizona, a ballet studio, Forks high…

I snorted, or I thought I did. I had actually attended Forks high. I thought I had made it up when I told the teacher I had.

I remembered who I was. I wasn't Juliet, the lost, lonely vampire. I was Isabella Marie Swan, beloved daughter of Charlie and Renee. I had a vampire family too, the Cullen's and loving friends.

I remembered my transformation, but there was something missing. Something my brain didn't want to remember. I went through the memory of my transformation of my memory again. Why was I so subdued? Where was Edward? That's when it hit. The memory.

"Okay, let's talk," I said. It sounded braver than it felt.

He took a deep breath.

"Bella, we're leaving."

I took a deep breath, too. This was an acceptable option. I thought I was prepared. But I still had to ask.

"Why now? Another year-"

"Bella, it's time. How much longer could we stay in Forks, after all? Carlisle can barely pass for thirty, and he's claiming thirty-three now. We'd have to start over soon regardless."

His answer confused me. I thought the point of leaving was to let his family live in peace. Why did we have to leave if they were going? I stared at him, trying to understand what he meant.

He stared back coldly.

With a roll of nausea, I realized I'd misunderstood.

"When you say we–," I whispered.

"I mean my family and myself." Each word separate and distinct.

I shook my head back and forth mechanically, trying to clear it. He waited without any sign of impatience. It took a few minutes before I could speak.

"Okay," I said. "I'll come with you."

"You can't, Bella. Where we're going… It's not the right place for you."

"Where you are is the right place for me."

"I'm not good for you, Bella."

"Don't be ridiculous." I wanted to sound angry, but it just sounded like I was begging. "You're the very best part of my life."

"My world is not for you," he said grimly.

"What happened with Jasper – that was nothing, Edward! Nothing!"

"You're right," he agreed. "It was exactly what was to be expected."

"You promised! In Phoenix, you promised that you would stay –"

"As long as that was best for you," he interrupted to correct me.

"No! This is about my soul, isn't it?" I shouted, furious, the words exploding out of me – somehow it still sounded like a plea. "Carlisle told me about that, and I don't care, Edward. I don't care! You can have my soul. I don't want it without you – it's yours already!"

He took a deep breath at stared, unseeingly, at the ground for a long moment. His mouth twisted the tiniest bit. When he finally looked up, his eyes were different, harder – like the liquid gold had frozen solid.

"Bella, I don't want you to come with me." He spoke the words slowly and precisely, his cold eyes on my face, watching as I absorbed what he was really saying.

There was a pause as I repeated the words in my head a few times, sifting through them for their real intent.

"You…don't...want me?" I tried out the words, confused by the way they sounded, placed in that order.

"No."

I stared, uncomprehending, into his eyes. He stared back without apology. His eyes were like topaz – hard and clear and very deep. I felt like I could see into them for miles and miles, yet nowhere in their bottomless depths could I see a contradiction to the word he'd spoken.

"Well, that changes things." I was surprised by how calm and reasonable my voice sounded. It must be because I was so numb. I couldn't realize what he was telling me. It still didn't make any sense.

He looked away into the trees as he spoke again. "Of course, I'll always love you…in a way. But what happened the other night made me realize that it's time for a change. Because I'm…tired of pretending to be something I'm not, Bella. I am not human." He looked back, and the icy planes of his perfect face were not human. "I've let this go on much too long, and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't." My voice was just a whisper now; awareness was beginning to seep through me, tricking like acid through my veins. "Don't do this."

He just stared at me, and I could se from his eyes that my words were far too late. He already had.

"You're not good for me, Bella." He turned his earlier words around, and so I had no argument. How well I knew that I wasn't good enough for him.

I opened my mouth to say something, and then closed it again. He waited patiently, his face wiped clean of all emotion. I tried again.

"If…that's what you want."

He nodded once.

My whole body went numb. I couldn't feel anything below the neck.

"I would like to ask one favour, though, if that's not too much," he said.

I wondered what he sae on my face, because something flickered across his own face in response. But, before I could identify it, he'd composed his features into the same serene mask.

"Anything," I vowed, my voice faintly stronger.

As I watched, his frozen eyes melted. The gold became liquid again, molten, burning down into mine with an intensity that was overwhelming.

"Don't do anything reckless or stupid," he ordered, no longer detached. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

I nodded helplessly.

His eyes cooled, the distance returned. "I'm thinking of Charlie, of course. He needs you. Take care of yourself – for him."

I nodded again. "I will," I whispered.

He seemed to relax just a little.

"And I'll make you a promise in return," he said. "I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if I'd never existed."

My knees must have started to shake, because the trees suddenly wobbling. I could hear the blood pounding faster than normal behind my ears. His voice sounded farther away.

He smiled gently. "Don't worry. You're human – your memory is no more than a sieve. Time heals all wounds for your kind."

"And your memories?" I asked. It sounded like there was something stuck in my throat, like I was choking.

"Well" – he hesitated for a short second – "I won't forget. But my kind…we're very easily distracted." He smiled; the smile was tranquil and it did not touch his eyes.

He took a step away from me. "That's everything, I suppose. We won't bother you again."

I gagged, trying desperately to hold the painful emotions that came along with the memory at bay. Oh God, I had been the distraction. He had left me, and then I wandered back to him and became his distraction!

He said he couldn't be with you, remember? Maybe he was still being faithful to you. A small voice in my head whispered. No, he must have been trying to be faithful to his distraction, or whatever he had. He didn't care about me anymore.

These human memories were permanently imprinted in my perfect inhuman memory, and I hated it. These memories, which I'd spent ten years hunting, were here to stay now that I didn't want them.

The physical pain of the memories faded, but the emotional pain burned bright, ripping me into pieces that could not be glued together. I was faintly aware of someone's arms around me, but the pain had me withdrawing within myself. Whatever my senses registered went unnoticed.

I fought for control. I couldn't let my painful emotions cloud my judgement. I was now in the heart of the enemy's territory. I now looked forward to Brandon and the Volturi's arrival. They would save me from my cruel tormentor who would always hold my heart.

"It's Bella!" I heard someone say as I battled back my emotions.

"Bella? Can you hear me?" I recognized that one. It was Edward. My throat contracted in a gag like motion. The whispers continued, and I regained control. I felt my jaw tense in anger. Anger was good. Anger held the hurt back. I opened my eyes. It wasn't one of those fluttery movements like you see in movies and television shows. It was an angry, purposeful movement.

The room jumped into focus quickly, disorientating me. I could see them all. The one's who left me. I had to concentrate on keeping my breathing even so I didn't hold my breath in frustration.

"…Bella?" Edward asked, hope colouring his tone. Pathetic. I sat up quickly, startling Carlisle and Emmett, who were lightly holding me down. I broke their grips easily, catching them by surprise.

"You okay?" Emmett asked, obviously hurt by rudeness, but I didn't care. They didn't matter anymore. They left.

I swung my legs around and hopped off the bed. The arms I thought I felt earlier must have been someone carrying me. Edward, who had been sitting on the bed with me, grabbed my wrist lightly.

"Bella, you should sit down," he suggested calmly, and I snapped. That calm tone brought up the memory of him abandoning me again. I had the strangest sensation in my chest – like there was a hole there, a black hole, destroying me from the inside out.

"I don't think I'm going to sit down!" I snapped, wrenching my arm out of his grasp. I stalked towards the door, but Emmett and Jasper blocked the door.

"Bella, I know you're very angry and upset, but let's talk about this." Jasper reasoned. His tone made me sick. The whole place, people included, made me sick.

"I am very angry, Jasper, so you should let me leave before I do something I probably won't regret." I hissed. Emmett looked cowed.

"Bella…" Edward trailed off.

"Let. Me. Out." I said. My tone was deadly; it was low and full of menace. Emmett shifted so he blocked more of the door.

"Let her go," Carlisle whispered, "She obviously won't talk to use now." Emmett and Jasper shifted so they stood on either side of the door. I strode forward and yanked the door out of my way. I stormed down the stairs, and I heard someone follow me.

I got to the backyard before Edward stopped me. He grabbed my arm and spun me around so I faced him. He recoiled slightly when he saw my expression full of anger and hatred.

"Why are you leaving Bella?" He asked. His velvet voice was laced with hurt. I didn't care.

"Why am I leaving? You…" I could finish the statement, so I went over it. "You left me! I'm merely returning the favour!" I stormed past him, trying to make it to the woods so I could leave. I didn't know where I would go, but I had to leave.

"Please. I'm so sorry. Let me explain." Edward said, grabbing my arm once again. He was begging me and I couldn't care less; but there was still this small persistent voice in the back of my head yelling at me to listen to him. I shoved it away angrily.

"What's there to explain?!" I demanded, "You left me to find a distraction when I wasn't sufficient enough, and through some cruel twist of fate, I ended up being that distraction!" He flinched, as though I had physically hit him.

"Please Bella, I can't lose you again."

"You left. I won't be hurt by you again." And I ran. I yanked my arm free from his grasp and I ran as hard as I could. I couldn't be anywhere near him. I was alone again and I was sure that I would stay alone forever.

A/N: I wasn't sure if I should leave it here, or give you Edward's point of view. It would probably make more sense if you got both sides. I was considering making it the bonus, maybe that would get more reviews from you guys, but I'm not that mean, so here's it again, in Edward's pov.

Chapter 11: "No"

EPOV

36 hours. My time with Juliet was dwindling. I shouldn't feel this way about her; she wasn't my other half, my soul mate. That was Bella, she was the one for me, but I had left her so I could protect her. I sighed. I was very aware of Juliet beside me. I caught all her movements in my peripheral vision. I tried not to notice how upset she seemed, how she held herself with a nervous tension. I sighed again. Emmett and Jasper were fighting. Again.

"But Jasper, it's the easiest way!" Emmett whined. In his head his was filled with pleasure at the thought of taking Felix apart.

"Emmett, for the millionth time, just attacking with no plan isn't the way to go! And it's not even a real plan!" Jasper said, agitated. In his mind he was going over tactics he had learned in the south and was trying to figure out how he could include them in our fight. Alice looked close to tears. She wasn't used to not seeing what was coming. She was only picking up bits and pieces. They must be too far away, and she wasn't as attuned to the Volturi as she was to us.

Carlisle and Esme came down the stairs, and in an instant I knew what Tanya had said.

"They can't come. Tanya is worried about angering the Volturi." A low growl erupted from my chest.

"After all we've done for them?" I asked, barely containing my anger. Esme nodded.

We tried, Edward. Esme thought, "We'll just have to go it alone." We shouldn't have to though; we should have the help of our friends. My jaw clenched.

"I don't see what the big deal is; there are only three of them. I could handle them by myself!" Emmett said, flexing his oversized muscles.

"We don't know yet!" Alice snapped. I saw the future through her mind, and it was sketchy. We could tell that Brandon had gone to them, and that Aro was planning on only taking Brandon and another vampire named Nicole, but Caius and Marcus had different plans. They wanted to send Felix, Demetri and Jane, just in case.

"Maybe we should go hunting." Jasper suggested, trying to cool down the tense atmosphere. We need a breather, he thought. Emmett, Carlisle and I agreed because it seemed like the most practical idea, and we all left the house to hunt.

I wanted to stay by Juliet while we hunted because I was hesitant to leave her alone. She was a very observant woman, because after her second deer, she caught on to what I was doing.

"Edward, go hunt. They won't be here for another day and a half. I'll be fine." I started to protest, but after a very threatening glare, I decided to leave her.

"I'll be right back. What will you do?" She shrugged.

"I'll probably go back to the house and watch some TV; see if there are any big news stories about Italy." I rolled my eyes, but she already had her back to me. The Volturi wouldn't be on the television. I ran away from the house, looking for some big game. I felt more protective of Juliet everyday, and it scared me. I shouldn't be feeling this way. And I was surely going insane; I saw more of Bella in her everyday. It didn't make sense; first it was her lips, then her nose, her brow, her cheeks…

I attacked a large buck, trying to drive my current thought from my head. I managed to silence them as I drank, but once the animal was dry they started up again. Why was I torturing myself? She liked me, and I certainly liked her, so why did I tell her I couldn't be with her? Bella. I groaned, sinking into a squat with my head in my hands. Why did this have to be so difficult! Why couldn't I let Bella be in the past, and move forward!

"Because you're so masochistic." Someone said behind me. I stood up and whirled around to see Alice. She smiled guiltily, "You said the last part out loud." I sighed.

"Why is it so hard Alice?" I asked. My posture showed my defeat; my shoulders were slumped, my head hung. She came forward and wrapped me in a large hug.

"Because you left Bella, you feel you can't move forward. If it had been the other way around, maybe it would have been easier for you to move forward. I love Bella, I always will, but I know that you need Juliet, and she needs you."

"But Bella-" I started to protest, but Alice stiffened with a forceful vision. Juliet was sitting on the couch, a photo album – the photo album I took from Esme – in her hands. She flipped it open to the pages she wasn't supposed to see, and falls to the ground, her head in her hands, crying out in pain.

"No!" Alice cried, but I was gone. I had to get to Juliet before it came true. I ran as fast as I could, narrowly dodging trees as they whipped past my head at extreme speeds. Nothing else mattered at the moment – not my internal conflict, not the Volturi- the only thing that mattered was Juliet and keeping her away from the photo album.

But, I was too late.

"No!" I yelled as I saw Juliet crumple to the floor, just like the vision. I wasn't able to prevent it; I only rushed to watch it. I ran to her side, gently cradling her in my arms and her face scrunched in pain. Alice managed to get our family to the house, and they entered.

"What's happening?" Esme asked, and Carlisle appeared at my side.

"Help me." I croaked, but he was pulling a blank as to what was happening.

"Let's take her upstairs." He suggested. I lifted her carefully, and I ran her upstairs into her bedroom. The rest of my family crowded into the room, but I didn't bother to shoo them out. All that mattered was Juliet; but something strange was happening. Her face was…almost dissolving. All of her features... disappeared and were replaced with Bella's, like what had been happening for weeks.

"Bella?" Alice asked, in shock. She hadn't seen this coming.

What a twist of fate. The girl, my soul-mate, who I had to leave behind, hadn't moved on. She had found me once again. And I wasn't falling in love with someone new; it was still the same, loving, angelic Bella. She would always hold my heart, no matter what face she wore. I understood now.

"It's Bella!" Emmett crowed as she started to stir. I took a deep breath. I was extremely nervous.

"Bella? Can you hear me?" Please, be awake. Be okay. I pleaded silently. Her eyes snapped open, focusing to the new room.

"…Bella?" I was hopeful that we could go back to being normal, but Jasper was sensing very large amounts of hostility and pain rolling of Bella. She sat up, startling Emmett and Carlisle – who had been trying to hold her down – and forcing them to let go.

"You okay?" Emmett asked. What's wrong with her? His thoughts asked. I wasn't sure. She hopped off the bed. I grabbed her wrist before she could get too far.

"Bella, you should sit down," I said, trying to stay calm on the surface. It broke my heart to see her eyes so filled with hatred.

"I don't think I'm going to sit down!" She snapped, pulling her arm roughly out of my grasp. Emmett and Jasper – they were closest to the door – moved to block her path.

"Bella, I know you're very angry and upset, but let's talk about this." Jasper said, trying to keep things calm and under control. The waves of hostility rolling off her were so thick you didn't need Jasper's power to tell she would hurt someone if she didn't get her way.

"I am very angry, Jasper, so you should let me leave before I do something I probably won't regret." Emmett was shocked and hurt.

"Bella…" I didn't know what to say. What had hurt her so much? What happened to her?

"Let. Me. Out." Her threatening voice made Emmett move so he was more in the way. He wasn't going to let her go without a fight, like me.

"Let her go," Carlisle whispered, "She obviously won't talk to use now." Emmett and Jasper shifted so they stood on either side of the door. Bella strode through the door and went downstairs. I followed her, unable to lose her again.

She made it to the backyard before I stopped her. I lightly grabbed her arm and turned her so she faced me. I flinched back slightly when I saw how angry her expression was.

"Why are you leaving Bella?" I asked, the pain evident in my voice.

"Why am I leaving? You…" She trailed off, "You left me! I'm merely returning the favour!" If she was till so angry and upset over it, why had she waited until now to address me about it?

"Please. I'm so sorry. Let me explain." I didn't care that she wasn't making any sense, I couldn't let her leave. I'd explain why I left; I'd beg her for forgiveness.

"What's there to explain?!" she demanded, "You left me to find a distraction when I wasn't sufficient enough, and through some cruel twist of fate, I ended up being that distraction!" I flinched. She recalled my excuses with vampire clarity.

"Please Bella, I can't lose you again." I made a last ditch effort to keep her.

"You left. I won't be hurt by you again." She yanked her arm free of my grasp and she ran into the forest. I wanted to follow but Emmett and Carlisle had followed us downstairs and held me back, away from Bella.

"The Volturi will be here soon. It's best if she goes her own way right now, it's safer." Carlisle said. He was right. If I chased after her, and forced her to come back, the Volturi would take her away from me.

"Do you think…" No, they can't… "That Aro knows that Juliet is Bella?" I asked. My family didn't say anything, but their thoughts all reflected shock. "He would have joined hands with Brandon, and he would have seen Bella in his thoughts. And Aro has already seen Bella from ours when we visited three years ago."

"He wouldn't dare try to take her away if he knew." Carlisle said, but his thoughts betrayed his suspicion.

"If he tries to take her away–" Emmett was cut off by Alice.

"They're early."

A/N: Uh oh! I hope that made the chapter make more sense. This was my longest post ever. I'm very proud of myself. It is ten whole pages!

Please review! I would absolutely love to hit 200! Is that to much to ask? I hope not, because that would be an absolute dream come true!

Shameless promoting

You guys are so great to me with Waning Moonlight. I am so honoured to be getting this much feedback for my story that started out as a writers block exercise. I really can never thank you guys for all the support you've given me. Now, after saying that, I'm going to be a little bratty.

I'm starting a new story, Notes, and I've been spoiled by you all, so now that it's getting hardly any response from three chapters, I'm a little upset and I start to worry. I would love it, and would love you, if you gave my story a chance. Yes, it is a songfic, but it's not the usual song and why it makes sense. It's a full story that has one song per chapter.

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Thanks so much to reading this, and thank you so much if you take this into consideration. I really am sorry if I offended anyone by doing this, and I know I've been spoiled by the amazing response I've gotten from this story. Thanks again!

-Maggie