Disclaimer: I don't own blah, blah, blah, Family Guy, blah, blah, blah, and Naruto.
Chapter 10: Lions and tigers and Michael Jackson! Oh my!
A/N: Hell ya! Schools out bitches! We got more time to write more chapters bitches.
Summer: Sorry for the language. We're crazy!
A/N: Me on crack! Anyway, today we go onto the 2nd exam and have a CSI parody. We meet Michael Jackson in this. So yeah!
(theme song crap)
Narrator: Now get ready to get dirty… to get dirty. We gonna see how crime scene investigating is like and how dirty it is. Enjoy you pervs!
Chris: (walking through the forest) Right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot… (interrupted)
Kevin: Shut the (beep) up! God! You know how annoying that is!
Chris: No!
Meg: Shut up you two? We need to be quiet to not be attacked.
Chris: Ok… nothing to do, nothing to do, nothing to do…
Kevin: Shut up!
Meg: What did I say?
Kevin & Chris: You said something this chapter?
Meg: Oh my God! I'm surrounded by idiots.
Kevin: You said something.
Chris: Yeah, I wasn't really paying attention.
Meg: Do you guys lack the gray matter between your ears?
K & C: Wha?
Joe: (as inner Sakura) Oh my God! You guys are freakin' retards! I am going to beat the (beep)en (beep) out of shove my hands up your asses so I can rip out your prostates. Cha! Cha! Cha!
Meg: Please keep it down! We don't want to be heard.
(As they we're arguing, 3 ninjas from the Hidden Crap Village are looking at them.)
Ninja #1: Look at those idiots letting their guard down.
Ninja #2: It's like taking candy from a baby.
(A cutaway scene appears with a ninja in front of a baby carriage.)
Ninja: (took candy from a baby) Haha! You can't get me 'cause I'm a ninja. (the baby took out an AK-47 and shot him)
Baby: Goo goo, gah gah, pl pl plee! (translated- Go (beep) yourself!)
(end cutaway scene)
Ninja #1: Ok! Let's go! (They sneaked attacked the team.)
Ninja #3: Turd shuriken! (throws turds in the shape of shuriken at them, don't tell me how they sculpt it that way)
Kevin: Crap!
Chris: I see that.
Ninja #2: Now it's time for all of you to die or get knocked unconscious or get paralyzed or just get beaten badly or… (While he's listing stuff, Meg came up behind him and hit him in the head with a large mallet. Yeah! Mallet space!)
Meg: Take that you son of a (beep) for scaring the crap out of me literally. (knocks him unconscious)
Chris: Ew.
Meg: Shut up Chris!
Ninja #1: Hmm, so the crap is still in your pants then. (does hand signs) Crappy Spike ball jutsu! (In Meg's pants, her crap becomes a spike ball which cuts her ass. Try not to imagine her ass too hard.)
Meg: Gah! Crap!
Chris: I see that!
Meg: Shut up Chris! Hey this could be an excuse for claiming to lose my virginity. (Everybody around her vomits including summer and bro.)
Bro: (beep)! Bitch! You made me lost my lunch.
Summer: My eyes and ears! They burn!
Meg: Hey shut up!
Ninja #1: My God! I can't get that image out of my head. It burns. This is a fate worst than death. (He passes out leaving ninja #3 left.)
Ninja #3: Oh crap! I'm left.
Meg: No shit!
Ninja #3: Gotta go! (runs away screaming like a school girl and then runs into a tree and dies due to head trauma)
Chris: (walks up to their bags and rummage through them) Looks like we're in luck. We got a donut scroll.
Meg: (grabbed it from Chris and twirled around like Ash getting a badge) I got a donut scroll! (pikachu pops up for no reason)
Pikachu: Pi-ka-chu!
Kevin: How do we know we got the right scroll? The authors were too stupid to make us know which scroll we got last chapter.
Chris: We obviously got a sausage scroll in the beginning because some speed fell out of the sausage scroll we got, and all of them have speed with it.
Kevin: How do you know that?
Chris: I don't really know.
Meg: Well, who cares what scroll we had in the beginning! At least, we got both scrolls.
Chris: Okay.
Kevin: Agree.
Meg: Now let's go to the tower.
(They walked through the forest towards the tower.)
Chris: Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot, left foot…
Kevin: What did I said earlier?
Chris: Pickled pigs feet!
Kevin: No you (beep)en moron!
Meg: Dude shut the (beep) up! We are still not safe. I don't wanna get ambushed again.
Chris: Geez. You don't have to overreact.
Meg: Sorry I'm PMSing.
Chris: I see.
(Meanwhile, summer is in front of the forest gates eating lunch.)
Summer: Yumm.. jelly donuts. (squirts jelly on a tree making an image of Eiji's ass from the Prince of Tennis) (A/N: This is summer and I just want to say I LOVE EIJI!) Ah yes! A great image on a tree! Eiji's ass complete with dimples!
(All of a sudden Mike Rowe from Dirty Jobs pop up with ninjas in front of her.)
Mike: Hello, summer! Ah, we found some corpses next to a statue commemorated to me installed by Adam West yesterday. Um… they have something weird about them.
Summer: Like what?
Mike: They all lost their noses.
Some ninja: Also, the male corpses lost their wangs.
Mike: Ew… Don't make it sound… dirty.
Summer: Ok! I should see them.
Mike: I must warn you. It's very disturbing… and dirty.
Summer: Dude, shut up with the dirty puns.
Mike: I can't… It's like a habit or something.
(They all do the ninja jump thing to the site.)
Summer: (looking at the corpses) Wow! Their faces are really distorted.
Mike: Look at the ugly sons of bitches.
Summer: They're all covered in blood but no signs of entry or puncture wounds.
Mike: (examines them) They have no bruising either. All of them looked really frightened though.
Summer: (looks at their nails and found some dead skin) Looks like they fought back even when they ran out of weapons and chakra. At least we found some DNA. I must go to the lab to find out whose skin this is even though I am a field investigator not a lab investigator. (walks out of the area)
(All of a sudden, the Chinese guy from the Hot Pocket commercials pops out of nowhere.)
Hot Pocket guy: You no hungry for the truth. (everybody looks at him in a retarded way) You hungry for hot pockets! (shows Hot Pockets logo) Hot Pockets!
Summer: Who the (beep)en hell are you? You must be related to the crime scene. I will arrest you although I don't have the power to legally do that then I will interrogate you which is another thing I don't have the power to do. (takes out a kunai and put it to his throat) Who did this you son of a bitch?
HPG: Ah… it was a guy with pale skin and long black hair.
Summer: Orochimaru?
HPG: No you hungry idiot! It's Michael Jackson.
Summer: Of course! That explains the nose and wang things. I must go! (she runs into the forest)
Mike: (to other ninjas) Should we pick up the corpses?
Random ninja: I guess so.
Mike: Corpse collector… that's a dirty job. (to ninjas) Is there a proper corpse picking technique?
Random ninja: Not really.
Mike: Sounds simple. (to camera) Picking up more corpses, cleaning up the mess, and cleaning the corpses…next time on dirty jobs!
Random ninja: Like they'll show that on the Discovery Channel.
Mike: Hey they had shown a crazy man who makes artwork out of road kill.
Random ninja: No they didn't. It's on YouTube as "Too Gross for Discovery" because of just that.
(back to Chris, Meg, and Kevin.)
Chris: Are we there yet?
Meg: No.
Chris: Are we there yet?
Meg: Did you heard me the last time?
Chris: You were talking.
Meg: Shut up!
(Hidden in the leaves, Michael Jackson disguised as a ninja from the Hidden Crap Village watches Meg, Chris, and Kevin.)
MJ: Oh! 3 little boys just standing there waiting for me to get them. Oh! It's like a dream!
(back to the 3)
Chris: Oh crap need to take a wiz.
MJ: (in the background) Oh joy!
Chris: Who said that?
MJ: It's just a tree here talking to other trees.
Chris: Make sense. So anyway, I'll use the um… bushes. (walks towards the bushes)
Meg: Thank God he's gone!
Kevin: Amen to that.
(back to Chris)
Chris: (while whizzing on an ant hill) Die! Ants! Die!
Ant: (looking at Chris's wang) Dude what's that? (the wee landed on her and her friends)
Ants: (while running around) DAHHH!
Chris: All done! (walks away slowly)
(While Chris was walking slowly, Michael Jackson sneaked up behind him and tied him up.)
MJ: Oh joy! I caught a naught little boy. 2 more to go!
Chris: Ah… you mean one more.
MJ: Ah I did see 2 other boys walking with you.
Chris: Ah no, that's Kevin and my sister.
MJ: Ew! A girl! Nasty! Well, I will just kill her and take the boy. (to Chris) I will see you later.
(MJ leaves Chris for the 2 of them.)
Kevin: Wow! He's taking a long time!
Meg: Must have drunk a lot of liquids before we left.
Kevin: Maybe he has… (All of a sudden, MJ attacked from behind them.)
MJ: Crap shuriken! (throws crap at them and it misses)
Meg: (turns around) Damn it! Another Hidden Crap Village ninja! You guys come out endlessly like diarrhea.
Kevin: Here! I'll fight her!
Meg: Oh you're my knight in shining armor, Kevy!
Kevin: Shut up! (to MJ) Let's do this.
MJ: Ok! Be nice to me. Crap shuriken! (throws more crap)
Kevin: Grand Fireball Jutsu! (He does hand signs uber fast and then throws fire at the crap shuriken. The place starts to smell bad.) Damn it! I shouldn't have done that! (While Kevin was choking, MJ stole a sausage scroll from Kevin's backpack.)
MJ: Ohhh… a sausage scroll! Something I really like.
Meg: Ew... Now what are you going to do with that?
MJ: This! (shoves the scroll up his ass) Want it now!
Kevin: Ok! You can have it.
MJ: I taught so. (to Kevin) Oh! To fight like that at your age! Oh! I wish I could still do that. (MJ ran towards Kevin who is still stunned and grabbed his nuts which paralyzes him. Then MJ bit Kevin in the neck giving him the curse mark thing.) Now you will want me.
Kevin: Oh shit! My dragon balls!
(chapter ended)
Kevin: To be continued!
Chris: I hope I live!
Kevin: Shut up!
Narrator: Next time on "When the World Turned Upside Down"… part 2 of the 2nd chuunin exams. Will MJ kill Meg and rape Chris and Kevin? Will Kevin lose his curse mark? Will Chris lose his virginity? Will Meg shut the (beep) up? Tune in next time!
(ending theme crap)
Summer: Well this is the end of this chappy. Sorry for the long update… IT'S NOT MY FAULT! BLAME MY BROTHER!! Well some of it was my fault. Me being the lazy ass I am and I was working on my new story. Oh yeah! Do any of you guys like Prince of Tennis? Because that's my new story! It's called "The Other Side". Plz read!! Oh and another thing is my dad's birthday is coming up! He's going to be um… oh crap what was it… 50 or something. Oh wait that's my mom, my dad is going to be 62! Yeah! I know he's old! On July 15!
Bro: The party will roll heads!
Summer: That's a retarded pun! But to make you feel better, I'll humor you. Hahahahahaha! You're so funny!! Haha…
Bro: You idiot! I'm quoting something from "The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya." It's cracktastic!
Summer: Don't call me an idiot! I haven't even watched that anime! BAKA!
Bro: Dummkopf!(idiot in germen) I sent it to you on YouTube and you didn't see it yet.
Summer: I'll see it later! Come on, let's end this and let the readers review!
Bro: Remember folks! Only you can prevent a forest fire!
Summer: WTF! Stop getting off topic! (to readers) Ok plz review before this diote(idiot in french) says more random and stupid stuff.
Bro: You're just as stupid and random as me. (hits her in the head with a mallet and knocks her unconscious) (looks at his watch) Looks like I have a lot of time on my hands. (hits himself with mallet thus knocking himself unconscious)
