So there was the day that Stiles lost his phone. Given that he has had to buy new one already this year and can't afford a new one, he desperately hopes that someone has turned it in. Borrowing Scott's cell he dials his own phone. Lucky him, it turns out it was found and turned in to the school office. Even luckier, that means speaking to the principal.

"What do you have set as your screen saver?" The principal asks him. Stiles has to think through it as he has several pictures he uses on a rotating basis as his background photo. Yeah, he'd had a bootie call last night so that means...

"Uhhh, it's a photo of my boyfriend's ass?" He manages to say without squeaking. Or at least he hopes he has. He tries to play it cool, but he knows his ear tips must be turning red because he can feel them burning.

"Describe it for me. We need to make sure it's yours" The principal says.

"Well, round very nicely shaped. Not really an apple or a heart really. Very toned and tight. And I think he's wearing his Calvins? The boxer short cause they allow for some flow, but are also totally flattering?" Stiles knows that his voice is going higher as he goes further into the explanation because he has watched the Principal's face go from confusion to horror and realizes that this might not be what the principal had been asking him to describe, but once started he couldn't stop.

To make matters worse the phone started ringing and the tune Color Me Bad's "I Want To Sex You Up."

(I wanna love you down)
I wanna sex you up,
All nite, (you make me feel good)
I want (to rub you down)
I wanna sex you up,

Let me take off all your clothes.
Disconnect the phone so nobody knows.
Let me light a candle,
So that we can make it better.
Makin' love until we drown.

blasted out and the image of Derek's ass in his black Calvin's switched to one of Derek's naked abs.

"I take it that this is the boyfriend calling and that he can confirm it is your phone?" The principal says drily. Stiles just nods his head and crosses his fingers that Derek won't be pissed.

"Hello, who might you be? I take it you have some name other than 'hot bod 4 hire'?" The principal asks. "The reason I am asking is I am the principal at Beacon Hills High and this phone has been turned in has lost and we are trying to locate the owner." Stiles could hear and angry sounding rumble of words coming through the phone. "So it is Mr. Stalinski's phone?" He confirms before saying thank you and hanging up the phone. "I will of course have to speak to your father about this." The principal adds before ushering Stiles out of his office.

As he heads to his locker to get his homework and to dump off his books, Stiles gets a text from Derek.

Derek:

Stiles, seriously?! For hire? I'm outside.

Stiles is just happy that Derek doesn't even know the half of it. He just wished the principal would forget about it all before he had a chance to speak with the Sheriff.

Derek is standing at the front desk of the police station and it is entirely voluntary. He sighs under his breath because he just knows that Stiles is never going to let him live down the fact that he left his phone either at the bank or the grocery store (he's not sure which) and that both have a policy of turning lost phones into the police station. The officer at the front desk must have recognised him, because she had told him to wait a minute and hightailed it back to the Sheriff's office. He sighs again. He's not sure f she recognised him from the wanted poster days or from the dinner the other week. He thinks she was there at the breakfast. Either way, he was now going to have to be dealing with the Sheriff. He reigns in his nerves as the Sheriff walks up to the counter. "Son, what can I do for you? Nothing is wrong with Stiles is there?" The Sheriff asks a worried look on his face.

"No, he fine. I just picked him up from practice. He's out in the car trying to break my radio." He clicks the lock button on his choop choop locking his doors remotely and then unlocking them warning Stiles that he can hear what he's doing. "I left my phone at the back or the grocery store earlier today and they both said if it had been found it would be here."

"Yeah, most business don't want their employees stealing the phones or the responsibility of finding the owners so they bring them here." The Sheriff explains as he pulls a shoebox of phones out from under the counter. "What kind of phone is it?"

"Black Iphone." Derek answers. "No identifying marks. "

"Well I got 2 that fit that description. Password? And what's on the phone?"

Derek sighs again and rubs the bridge of his nose. "Password: Stiles. The photo should be of Stiles and me." While the Sheriff fiddles with the phones, Derek tries not to get flustered. Nothing like telling your boyfriend's Dad that his son's name is your phones password and that you have a dorky couple photo as your background. Lame. Never mind that Stiles had set up his phone in the first place, but he's not going to admit that to the Sheriff either.

"You boys doing anything interesting tonight?" The Sheriff asks as he tries the second phone obviously feeling the need to fill in the awkward silence.

"Just picked up some movies. Going to watch them at my house. I won't keep him out too late." God Derek really hates talking to parent's.

"Ahhh, good. Football game on tomorrow, you boys might want to stay in and watch it. Stiles could make grilled cheese and I have cold beer." Just as Derek is going to answer back thathe would talk to Stiles the Sheriff says "Ahhh haaa" in triumph and in the next instant Derek's now unlocked phone begins to ring.

To Derek's ever living shame and horror the ringtone is not a song, but instead is the clip of that but call that Stiles made to his Dad that one time. The clip that was never ever ever suppose to resurface again. The one that the Sheriff believed he had deleted from his phone never knowing a copy had been made. Her rubs his face with his palm trying to figure out how to get out of this awkward situation. He looks at the Sheriff mouth open to explain what her not quite sure and notices that the Sheriff is holding the phone screen facing him so that he can see the profile photo that popped up. Derek is seriously going to kill the kid.

"Want to explain to me why my son is wearing a deputy's uniform while bound and gagged to a chair?"

"I swear to god that photo was not the one that was there last night. Nor was that my ringtone." Derek goes for earnest, but feels like all he pulls off is pissed."

"The infamous Stiles strikes again." The Sheriff says with a bit of a smile. "He does the same thing to my phone sometimes." Derek grins a little and he and the Sheriff have a moment of shared frustration and fondness for Stiles. The Sheriff shakes his head at Stiles' mischief, but then his smile fades a little as if he is suddenly connecting the dots. "So, if you had a different ringtone and profile photo of my son on here last night and Stiles was asleep at home and I dropped him off at school, then when exactly did he have time to access your phone?"

Later Derek admits it wasn't the smartest thing to do, but he just grabs his phone from the Sheriff and books it. Jumps in the car and drives off.

Stiles, of course, gets a call from his Dad who tells him that he and Derek are expected for football tomorrow no excuses. That there will be talks and rules and no further sex while his Dad is in the house. When Stiles hangs up his phone, he looks at Derek and asks "The fuck dude?"

Derek just give him that look, the one that says it's all your fault Stiles and adds "Did you change your ringtone on my phone and your profile pic by any chance Stiles?" And watches the dawning horror on Stiles' face as he realizes what must have happened.