CHAPTER 12

I stared at myself in the mirror after showering. The boy reflecting in front of me was changing so fast, I wasn't sure if I knew him anymore.

My eyes focused on the spot on my neck: red with hints of purple against my ivory skin. His mark. My fingers brushed against the bruised skin as I remembered his lips, his tongue, his teeth against my flesh.

The tightness in my chest tugged hard.

I stared into my own eyes and saw the light flickering in its gaze. I was happy. I was scared. I was changed.

I was in love. I was completely, insanely, unbelievable in love with a boy.

The week at school became a hurdle of teasing and interrogation. It wasn't painful, mean taunting the way it was with Jasper, but it was constant and aggravating. I had tried to hide the mark on my neck, wearing collar shirts and turtlenecks, but it was in vain. Mike saw it first and pointed it out. After that, the questions and guessing games started.

Everybody wanted to know which girl had finally been able to have me.

I smirked and rolled my eyes and avoided any answer, hiding my secret deep inside, but wanting to scream it loud and clear.

I glanced at Jasper more than once, wanting to connect, to have an ally in this world of secrecy, but as always, his eyes were casted away, never meeting mine.

Saturday, I hurried to the closet with only a quick hi to Ms. Pearl. He was already there, sitting against the wall, and looked at me with a big, bright smile.

It always felt so good, so right, when he looked at me with this dazzling smile. And at that moment, his words from last week were truth. I could see the evidence plain on his face. I made him happy. I was helping him.

I smiled back and sat next to him, making sure that my arm and leg touched him. I needed to feel him close. I felt him leaning closer, pressing more, so that our sides were becoming one.

I let my head fall against the wall and closed my eyes as the comforting sparks melted my insides. I allowed the blissful fire to lick my core as I felt and rejoiced at the heat coming from Jasper.

I wanted to kiss him again. I wanted to feel his mouth against my skin. I wanted my lips to travel over his body. I wanted to taste him.

I opened my eyes and turned to watch him. We were almost nose-to-nose, wrapped in the dim light of the closet. He was looking at me intently, his gaze deep and piercing. I felt his eyes penetrating through my flesh, through my bones, through my soul.

When we locked eyes, everything intensified: the drum of my heart, the irregular inhales and exhales, the warmth radiating from him.

I felt his cool fingers on my neck, caressing that spot that was still a little colored from last Saturday. His fingers lightly traced the outline of his mark and I let out a shaky breath.

He licked his lips, his eyes still ardent on mine.

"So rumor has it that you got a hickey," he rasped.

I felt my cheeks turn red. He always heard everything at school. He knew what people thought and said. I was afraid he was mad I didn't deny any of the rumors. I looked down, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry about that," he apologized in a whisper.

My eyes shot up to stare at him, hurt by his misplaced apology. I needed to see his eyes, to understand the meaning of his words. I felt a stab gnawing at my heart. I shook my head.

"Why? Don't." I accused.

I took a shaky breath in. "I like it. I like having a reminder of you when we… when we can't be together."

He studied me a long time, his eyes drowning into mine. We were getting lost in each other. His fingers unconsciously continued to caress my skin, leaving in its path flickers of delight.

Then his serious face lit up, a smirk lightening his beautiful features. He leaned in and kissed me. I yielded to him easily, letting him lead the dance, our lips seemingly made for each other.

His lips parted from mine and trailed down my jaw, my throat, until it reached that precious mark. He placed a wet kiss over it.

"So who was it Edward?" he rasped, his lips against my flesh. I shivered and let a moan escape.

"Was it that slutty Tanya?" He kissed the spot again.

"Was it that outcast Bella?" He licked it and I let out a whimper.

"Was it that mysterious, anonymous college girl?" He slowly pulled my flesh between his teeth.

He made his way back up, slowly and dotingly. He pulled my lower lip between his teeth and stared at me.

"Who was it, Edward?" he groaned into my mouth. My body erupted with goose bumps as his voice rumbled through me.

I was panting loudly into his mouth, my eyes glued into his. My hands flew to his face, capturing him close to me, as I tried to form words.

"You," I breathed. "It was you. Only you."

I saw fire flicker through his lidded eyes before he pressed his mouth against mine with fervor. I returned each of his kisses, nibbles and bites with pure passion.

I grabbed at him, pulling him closer. He pushed and pressed against me, both needing friction urgently. We grasped at each other forcefully; the need to feel our bodies melded together, to lose sense of where I started and where he ended, was stronger than anything else.

And as bliss took over my body, I wondered if my love for him could one day be unconcealed and open, free for the world to see.