Hey guys *waves awkwardly* Sorry it took me two weeks to update. Last week was like the crappiest week ever, and I was really stressed out. I figured no update was better than a 2,000 crap for a chapter update. I mean, this chapter is 4,773 without the A/N, so I would hope you all agree that it was worth the wait. ;) Anyways, I know I said that sometimes I would update every two weeks if things got hectic, well that was last week in a nutshell. Buuuuut, I got like a million hours of sleep this past weekend and I feel GREAT. Oh, and next week is fall break. Hallelujah! But I might be a little AWOL for a bit because October is like mega busy. My senior night is next week for soccer, and playoffs start the week after that, AND my senior pictures are the 20th, and I take the ACT for the last time on the 27th, and yeah, so you get the point. It might be an occasional two week or week and a half update until soccer is over. Once I'm done with soccer, I will update every Sunday or Monday. So don't kill me if I miss a week. Thanks ;P Oh, and did I mention that I love you guys. You all are such awesome supporters. I just hope you stick it out throughout all of BMP (because you know, eventually the plot is going to get wild and occasionally aggravating) So yeah, that's it for my rant. Review! I wonder if we could get close to 200 before my next update. Challenge accepted? (;
A rush she runs from my heart
The room is spinnin to red
The blood is leaving my head
You're such a chemical
It feels like fire and ice
You bring my body to life
Bouncing into the night
Just like a butterfly
- 'Never Have I Ever'
by Hot Chelle Rae
Sebastian stood up and moved towards the small fridge he and Jace shared that was at the foot of his bed. "Well, what do you want? I have orange juice, Coke, and Kool-Aid." He opened the black fridge and peered over his shoulder at me.
"No, Sebastian…" I sighed and stared back at him. "What alcohol do you have?"
"Oh! I have lots of alcohol." He shut the fridge and reached to pull the blanket away from the side of his bed, revealing an endless supply of liquor bottles.
"Absolutely not, Clary." Will deadpanned as he pulled away from me and glared at me, his eyes full of disappointment.
"What?" I asked in confusion. Jace pulled away from me, too, and he nodded at Sebastian. Sebastian pulled a bottle out and handed it to Jace. I reached for it, but Will grabbed my hand and jerked my attention back to him.
"You're not getting drunk. You've been sober for far too long to just throw it away now." Will ordered as he pushed the bottle away from the two of us.
"When did you become my dad, Will?" I snapped angrily. "If I want to drink, then I damn well have the right to. It's not a joint decision."
"I'm just looking out for you. Do you really want to disappoint your friend like this?" Will remained surprisingly calm, attempting to give me the guilt trip.
With a burning in my throat, I realized that he was accomplishing exactly what he wanted, and I looked away from his deep blue eyes. Before I could reply, Jace set the bottle down and said, "Excuse me, but I think she deserves to let go for just once."
"Yeah. What could it hurt?" Sebastian agreed with a shrug as he pulled out another bottle and popped off the top. He gulped down some of the liquid and offered it to me with a sly grin.
Glancing at Will, I hesitated. He continued to gaze at me with incredibly solemn eyes. "Well go ahead then!" he snapped as he stood up and stalked to the door. "It's not like you need my permission anyways." Then he opened the door and slammed it closed behind him in an intensely heartbreaking way.
I frowned at the door before turning back to Sebastian. He shook the bottle at me a little and smirked as I took it. "If this isn't enough, I can bring you some more later." Sebastian offered after I took the first blazing gulp of a long night.
Simon wandered the halls as he searched for Jace Herondale. Simon had just left Clary's room, and he was determined to figure out what had just caused her most recent breakdown. He figured one of the Herondales needed to stay with her during her little episode. Simon would've looked for William first, but hours earlier he saw Will storming down the hall in a furious rage; Simon didn't even want to try to mess with that.
He already tried Jace's room and the pool and asked a couple of the lower ranked untouchables. No one knew where he was, and Simon wasn't sure where to look next. His next destination was the café, but he wasn't entirely sure if he'd find him there either. Simon stepped into the café and scanned the room for Jace's blonde head.
When he saw Magnus and Alec walking together out the back door, Simon took a chance and followed the couple. The two boys took their food to the closest gazebo and joined a group of other people. Keeping a safe distance, Simon continued to trail behind them. It was the usual group of people Simon would predict to be eating together: Alec, Magnus, Sebastian, Jem, Tessa, Camille, Isabelle, and Jace.
Simon knew what he was about to do would probably get him hell later—from both Maia and the untouchables. But, Simon was seriously concerned with Clary's health, and that concern ranked a little higher than his fear of the repercussions. Catching everyone's attention, he stumbled clumsily into the gazebo. Jace and Isabelle were the first to stand up; Isabelle moved to steady him, but she thought better of it and stepped back from him.
For a moment, Simon forgot what he was doing there and couldn't help the stare that was fixated on the beautiful girl only inches away from him. She stared back at him with eyes wide and lips parted before moving backwards and sitting down. "What are you doing here rat-boy?" Jace asked with less vehemence than usual. His eyes seemed to continue to drift towards the endless grass terrain behind the institute.
"I, uh, well, I came here to talk to you." Simon muttered as he shifted his eyes back and forth from Jace to Isabelle.
"About what?" Jace's full attention landed on Simon now, and Simon realized that this was the first time that more than one untouchable gave him undivided attention other than when he was being teased.
"Clary," Simon replied softly.
Isabelle's eyes widened more, if that were possible, and she shot up again. "Is she all right?" Magnus asked as his eyebrows scrunched together in thought.
"Uh, well, I think Jace needs to stay with her tonight." Simon fumbled for words and awkwardly played with his hands.
"What's going on, Simon?" Jace, now completely serious, asked as he closed any distance between himself and Simon.
Simon couldn't help the surprise that filled him when Jace actually called him by his name. "She's just really drunk. I thought she wasn't drinking anymore, but it's pretty bad… I figured you or William could just stay with her to make sure she makes it through the night in one piece."
Jace pinched his nose. "God, I am so dumb." he groaned softly. "She's still in her room, right?" he asked Simon. His features were a mask of true anxiety.
"Yeah, she can barely hold herself up." Simon said as he tapped his foot restlessly.
"Will doesn't know that she's like this, does he?" Jace questioned, ready to bolt from the gazebo.
"No, I have no idea where he is…" Glancing away from Jace, Simon answered.
Jace nodded his head and turned away from the group of kids in the gazebo. "Thanks rat-boy. When things are a little less troublesome, we need to talk about why you were alone with her." Then Jace left, jogging through the café doors and out of sight.
Right after Jace disappeared, the attention on Simon evaporated. Simon didn't expect to keep the attention for long, but the speed of their change of attention was alarming. Uncomfortably, Simon turned to leave, but a soft hand grasped his wrist.
"If you want, you can grab some food and join us." Isabelle's graceful voice was the first thing Simon could actually discern because his brain had practically exploded from work overload.
She smiled at him with perfectly white teeth. "I don't want to intrude…" Simon garbled at the loss of words.
"Well, we could always do something. I'm bored anyways." she suggested with a wave of her hand.
Simon's heart raced eccentrically in his chest. This was the chance he had been waiting on for years. "O-okay then."
Pulling Simon away from the gazebo, Isabelle grinned and whisked the two of them away and on their own adventure.
Jace didn't bother knocking on Clary's door. He knew the combination by heart, and he highly doubted Clary could even make it to the door. When he opened the door, he was immediately hit by the foul smell of alcohol. He had never realized the amount of trouble he always caused while drunk, but now he understood why people hated him when he had downed some bottles. At first Jace didn't think Clary was in the room, but then he noticed a lump shifting underneath the covers of Clary's bed.
He joined her on the bed and waited patiently for her to come out. After minutes of silence, Jace began to hear her cry. At first it was quiet sniffles, but then it turned into sobs. "Clary, what's wrong?" Jace tried to coax her out from the sheets, but it seemed like she wasn't coming out. "I can stay here all night." he added after a few minutes of waiting for her.
She wrestled her way out of the covers and frowned at him. "What are you doing here?" she asked angrily while pushing untamed curls away from her face. Jace couldn't help himself; he smirked at her and helped brush curls away from her face. "I don't want company, Jace." she slurred as she tried unsuccessfully to bat his hands away from her face.
"Well Simon asked me to come check on you." Jace mumbled, wiping old tears away.
Clary seemed like she was about to shove him away again, but instead, she grasped his shirt and pulled him down onto the bed. They fell down together, and Clary erupted into a fit of giggles. Jace's lips quirked into a smile as he watched her shake from the laughter. She rolled over and faced him. "Can I ask you something?"
"You already did." Jace teased as she rolled her eyes.
"You know what I mean!" She slapped his arm and sat up.
"Sure, what do you want to ask me?" Jace propped himself on his elbow and stared at her.
She chewed on her lip and shook her head. "I don't remember now!"
Clary then stood up and began rummaging underneath her bed, obviously looking for something important to her. Finally, with a brilliant smile and a new bottle in her hand, she stood up and tried to open the new bottle of vodka. Instantly, the mood Jace was in was lost.
He stood up and reached for the bottle. Clary giggled and swooped the bottle away from him. "I can open it by myself." she said with a grunt of exertion as she tried to open it again, twisting it to the right instead of the left.
"I don't think you need any more to drink." Jace argued, reaching for the bottle again, and this time he actually managed to swipe it out of her hand.
"Hey!" she pouted, reaching out to take it back. Knowing all too well that Clary would never be able to reach very high, Jace held it above his head and grinned as she hopped around him in attempt to reclaim the bottle. She leapt up one last time and, in her drunken state, tripped over something Jace couldn't see and fell over. "Ow…"
Jace put the bottle on a shelf that he knew Clary couldn't reach and leaned over to help her up. "How much have you drank today?" he asked as he pulled her up. She tripped over her feet and fell into his chest.
"I don't know… a lot." Her face was in his chest, and he could barely understand what she was saying. "It'd be more if you would just give me that bottle." she snapped, reaching for his now empty hand. She looked up at him with eyes full of confusion. "W-what? Where is it?"
"I hid it because you've had enough for one day." Jace said, holding his arms out for her to balance on.
"You suck." she groaned, trying to push him away.
"Yeah, I know," Jace smirked at her. "But you need to go to bed. You're going to have a killer hangover tomorrow." He tried to lead her to the bed, but she pulled away and shook her head.
"I'm not tired, and you don't really want to go to bed." she whispered as she moved back over to Jace. Uncharacteristically, she pulled him into her and ran a finger down his cheek. Shocked and overwhelmed by a flurry of emotions, Jace couldn't move. "You're so sexy, Jace. Why aren't we dating yet?" She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek.
"B-because you're with Will all the time." Jace stuttered, feeling slightly flustered from, Clary's aberrant advances toward him.
"But why haven't you tried to change that?" She placed her hands on his shoulders and rubbed them down his chest.
"Clary," Jace's voice caught as Clary's fingers danced on the skin above his pants.
"What? I thought you liked me…"
With a low chuckle, Jace shook his head and grabbed her hands. "I do, and that's why I can't do this."
"What do you mean?" She frowned at him as she tried to maneuver her hands back to his lower stomach.
"I'd much rather have you in a more conscious state. You're smashed."
Her eyes widened and her mouth formed a small 'o'. Jace thought that she was finally realizing what was going on, but then she asked, "I'm what?" A crease appeared between her eyebrows as she seemed to be trying to work the phrase out in her head.
"You know, wasted? Plastered? Clary, you're drunk." Jace grinned at her when she nodded her head.
She giggled and sat down at the edge of the bed, pulling Jace down in front of her still holding onto his hand. "I am." Letting go of him, she fell backwards and off the bed and giggled again. "Forgive me?" she asked quietly after Jace helped her back up. Her eyes were wide and sparkling green, and Jace could feel the stuttering in his heart as she continued to stare at him.
"Of course. Let's go to bed." Jace reached over and pulled her down beside him, and they worked their way under the covers.
As Clary tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable, Jace played with a strand of her hair. Eventually, Clary stopped squirming, but she looked over at him and said, "Take off your pants." Jace's face must've said it all because then Clary flicked him on the nose and added, "Your jeans are rubbing my legs. How am I supposed to go to sleep like this?"
Jace laughed and got out of her bed, and slowly, just to get a reaction out of Clary, unbuttoned his pants and slid them off. Clary's eyes seemed to widen even more when he pulled his shirt off too. "What? I figured we might as well get completely comfortable."
With a devious smile, Clary pulled him back onto the bed and whispered in his ear, "I knew you'd do that." Then she rolled over and closed her eyes.
Jace, feeling completely played by this innocent little girl, rolled his eyes and put his arm around her waist. "Whatever, baby. Go to sleep." Clary's body shook a little with laughter, and she rolled over back over to face him.
"Goodnight, Jace." She kissed the tip of his nose and nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck. "Sweet dreams." she mumbled with a yawn.
I would say that the first thing I noticed when I woke up was the insanely intense headache racking my brain, but it wasn't. It was the screams of anger. I tried to sit up and look around the room, but the room spun around me, and I fell back down, nauseous and dizzy. Jace groaned, mumbles of obscenities not making their way out of the pillow his face was shoved into. Finally I was yanked out of my bed and over Jace's body.
Instantly I fell to the ground, and I began to dry heave. I felt like I was going to throw up, but I knew there was nothing in my stomach to get rid of other than alcohol, and my body wasn't going to let me just live this one down. Jace shot up as soon as I was pulled across him, and he glared angrily at the person standing above me. I blinked a couple of times and stared up at Kaelie. She was fully dressed and wore one of the scariest glowers I had ever seen in my life.
"What the hell is this?" she shrieked, gesturing wildly at me. I covered my head in attempt to keep the pounding down, but she continued with her rant. My head hurt so bad that I couldn't even listen to her words. "Are you even listening to me, Clary?"
Jace's concerned eyes met mine, and he held out a hand. "Kaelie, she's hungover for the first time in like a year and a half. Will you give her time to recover first?"
"Why should I do that?" she snapped, stepping towards him angrily.
"Well, she obviously isn't giving you the reaction you want. Maybe you should wait for when she can…?" he suggested as he stood up and pulled me back to the bed.
She made a loud sound in her throat that sounded more like a growl than a sigh and shoved Jace in the chest. "You listen to me Jace Herondale, and you listen to me good. If you want anything in your precious little life to seem half decent, you will meet me before dinner tonight. Go it? Jessamine asked me to help her in her little plot to figure out what Clary did that was so bad to get her here, and I have half a mind to do it now. You better watch yourself if you know what's good for you." She poked him in the chest hard and spun towards the door.
"Why do you think that would make me want to meet up with you?" Jace asked condescendingly.
"We both know that whatever she did to get in here wasn't some little thing. And, Jessamine is planning on figuring it out and telling the whole institute about it. I doubt you'd want her little feelings hurt. So back here at six? Be sure she's not here, either. Will would gladly take her off your hands anyways. He's been looking for her all morning." Kaelie's voice was sickeningly sweet, but I could barely comprehend the words coming out of her mouth. No wonder I had quit drinking—this shit sucks.
Jace looked beyond irate as she twisted the door handle, waiting on his response. "Fine, whatever, but don't think that this little ploy will keep me for long. Her past can't possibly be that bad."
Kaelie laughed maniacally. "We'll see, babe." She blew him a kiss and slammed the door behind her.
I winced at the sound and cradled my head in my hands. Jace's pained eyes landed back on me, and he went to my closet and began pulling clothes out. Scrunching my eyes together, I tried to figure out what he was doing. "Uh, Jace, those are my clothes…" I pointed out dumbly.
He glanced over his shoulder at me and smirked in an attempt to hide his frustration with Kaelie. "I know that. You need a shower and some food and lots of water, preferably lemon water. If there's any test I could ever ace, it would be one on how to recover from a hangover." Finally he walked back over to me with a pair of yoga pants and a big t-shirt. I stared at the clothes for a few minutes before finally taking them in my hands. He coughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of his neck. "I figured you'd rather pick out you're, uh, underclothes."
Despite the intense headache, I laughed. I laughed so hard that tears began to form in my eyes. "Underclothes?! The incredibly experienced Jace Herondale is embarrassed to say panties? This has got to be one of the most comical things ever. Say it. Say panties." I bit my lip with my front two teeth and stared at him expectantly.
Incredulously, Jace's cheeks became a slightly pink color. "I'm not embarrassed to say panties, Clary. I just figured it would be disrespectful to do so in front of you." He shook his head and spoke in a tone that he attempted to make come off as what I assumed he thought was appropriate.
I choked on my laughter. "Puh-lease! On one of my first days here you invited me to join a threesome. Any respect you have was out the door way before I even moved here."
Although I was obviously teasing him, he frowned and pushed up from the bed. "I regret doing that… it was so dumb of me to act the way I did."
"That was like forever ago. You apologized, and we moved on. I know you better than to judge you now from that. You did sleep in the same bed as me last night while I was ridiculously drunk, and you didn't try anything on me. You're better than what you seem to give yourself credit for."
The corners of his lips quirked up a little. "You did make it really hard to resist last night."
Now it was my turn to blush. "Oh, god, what did I do?" I asked, mortified. I hadn't been drunk in over a year and a half. From past experiences of being drunk, I knew that I acted wild—not really like a sex-crazed girl, but more so than I am when sober. I couldn't really remember much from the day before. I remembered the fight between Jace and Jonathan and my busted lip. I remembered Will storming out of Sebastian's and Jace's room when I asked for alcohol, but everything from then on was a blur.
Flashes of what I hoped to be memories passed through my head. None of them were pristine memories. Most of them seemed more impossible than not. I could remember Simon stopping by the room, but that was about it for my recollections of the night. Then one brilliantly clear memory stood out. Jace stripping down into just his underwear.
I gazed at him, fully taking him in. He seemed to be watching me with carefully guarded eyes as I continued to analyze the situation. Looking at him now, it was sort of insane to know that we had fallen asleep together and didn't do anything. His golden hair was mussed and curly, messy strands falling over his forehead, ears, and neck. The thick cords of muscle coiled and stretched with each move he made, making it almost unbearable to look away from him. Stepping towards him, I reached a hand out to graze his tan, broad chest.
He flinched back for a second, almost afraid of my touch, but he regained his composure as my fingers skimmed the sensitive skin of his abdomen. As my fingers continued to explore his warm skin, he slowly began to react. At first it was just chill bumps appearing on his arms, but then he shivered, and before I could react, he gripped my hand in his and pulled me flush to his body.
Shocked, I raised my head and felt his warm hands on my cheeks. Suddenly he pulled me closer and his warm lips connected with mine. I responded instantly, wrapping my arms around his neck and gripping his hair firmly in between my fingers. Automatically he deepened the kiss, and I tugged on his hair, eliciting an almost too delightful moan from him.
Jace picked me up and dropped us both onto the bed, breaking the kiss for a moment to resituate our bodies. His bare knees rested on the outside of my legs and his arms lay flat beside my head. He leaned back down and brushed his lips down my jaw line before kissing me again. This time, ready for his lips, I skimmed my tongue across his bottom lip. His breath quickened, and he managed to somehow squeeze our bodies even closer than they already were.
My whole body felt hot, and I couldn't help but want more. I had never felt such a strong desire to be with someone so much in my life, even before Sean. I moved my hands down the sides of his stomach, and he tensed up. I frowned as he looked down at me with wide eyes. His eyes seemed to be a cloudy amber, and my lips begged to kiss him again. He noticed my eyes flitting back and forth, and he sighed in aggravation.
He ran a hand through his now extremely mussed up hair and continued to stare down at me. I didn't know what to say, and I was too scared to prompt a rejection speech, so I waited silently. Unexpectedly, he bent down again and kissed my forehead, both of my cheeks, and my nose before kissing me gently on the lips again. "Clary, you are the most gorgeous girl I've ever seen in my life," he whispered, his cool breath fanning across my face. "I like you so much that I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up… so I don't want us to move fast. I don't even want to move halfway fast, if that makes sense. You're the first girl I've sincerely wanted to get to know better, and I don't want my hormones to get in the way of that. So, if you could do me the favor, please don't ever do that again. I can't guarantee that I won't lose control. I already feel out of control around you enough as it is."
Grinning, I leaned up and wrapped my arms around his neck. "So we can't kiss anymore then, can we?" I asked in mock disappointment.
He jerked back in surprise. "No! I didn't say that. I just mean no more doing—you know, no more touching me like… you know!" he rambled in frustration, his qualms taking over.
"I was just kidding. I'd be willing to kiss you all day." I mumbled, barely touching his lips with mine.
"We could start that now." He smirked as he deepened the kiss.
"Oh, but I need a shower and food and lots of water." I teased, pulling away from him.
Pouting, he ran another hand through his hair. "You're right. We have pretty much all the time in the world to kiss all day. Your hangover is what's really important." He raised a single eyebrow at me.
Crossing my arms in front of my chest, I huffed loudly. "You broke my brother's nose, and my brother busted my lip… Isn't that plenty of reason to drink for just one night?!"
"Lord, that's another thing!" he exclaimed, throwing his hands up in mock exasperation. "Let's just bring you to the hospital. You're practically falling apart!"
"No I'm not." I sulked before pushing him off the bed.
"Hey!" he yelped as he hit the floor. "Ow…" He rubbed his head when he stood up.
"Looks like we can share a room at the hospital, baby."
"That's it. I'm putting my clothes on, and you're showering. Anyone who insults Jace Herondale does not get to enjoy the sight of this bod. You're on punishment." He picked up his clothes from the floor and slid his jeans on.
Despite being slightly disappointed from his addition of clothes, I laughed and threw a pillow at him. "Like you could resist taking your clothes off around me anyways." I taunted with a roll of my eyes.
His eyes flashed, and then he was suddenly on top of me. "Is that a bet?" he muttered in my hair. "Cause you'd be the first one to rip off clothes, both mine and yours." Heat coursed through my body again, and my cheeks burned. Jace, obviously noticing, winked and placed a sloppy kiss on my cheek. "You go take a shower. I'll see you in the café in a bit, okay?"
He pulled his shirt on, covering his chest. I didn't want him to know, but I was slightly disappointed when he was no longer showing any skin. "You're no fun." I complained as he kissed the top of my head with a chuckle.
"Be sure to take a long shower. Just because you don't notice the headache now, won't mean you won't notice it when I'm gone. Take care of yourself for me, please?" He stared at me with deep, serious eyes.
"I swear I'll take a long shower for my health." I held up my hand for scout's honor.
"By the way, you snore." He added right before ducking out of my room.
My mouth fell open in surprise. "I don't…" I trailed off as his chuckles echoed. "Hey! I don't snore!" Although I knew he wouldn't hear it, I yelled after him. It was too bad that I was too giddy to be embarrassed at his observation. Jace's lips were the only thing I could concentrate on as I grabbed everything for my shower. What a glorious start to the day.
So I know it kinda seems like Clary is wishy-washy with Jace and Will, but she can't help it... so please don't rant on that. I mean, she was abused and raped by an ex, and now she's being hit on by two EXTREMELY gorgeous Herondale boys. I don't blame her for being a little confused —and excited to kiss them both. I just wanted to remind everyone that there will be a lot of her going back and forth. Her decision will be ridiculously tough, so she's gonna make some bad decisions and be a little back and forth. Just remember she can't help it (: Thanks for reading!
