Disclaimer: I do not own any of the private series(sigh), the amazing Kate Brian does.

I made this chapter in Josh's point of view so that you will know how he felt when he saw Reed with Upton!! Please tell me what you think

about it.

Please review after you read!!

Here is the 12th chapter of My Own Version of Suspicion:


Josh's Point of View

I used my chance to escape from my own torture chamber as soon as Noelle and Reed were out of sight. As soon as I inhaled fresh air, I was able

to think straight again. I almost told Reed what I truly feel about her, but then, with my luck, I was interrupted by the last person I wanted to see.

I felt like those few minutes were the longest and the hardest of all my life. I would even choose to die than witness that again. The restaurant

from where I was sitting before suddenly became claustrophobic as soon as that guy came into view.

As I was walking my way back to Easton, I felt my knees buckle below me. I can't forget how that guy kissed my Reed. He kissed her with so much

passion that I felt my stomach lurch inside me. I remembered his lips explore hers and I suddenly felt the need to sit.

I sat at the nearest bench I could see, but of course, I made sure that I was in a safe distance from my own torture chamber in the form of the

restaurant where Reed is right now. I pinched my nose to let my self calm down. Breath, Josh, breath. One..two…three….inhale…exhale.

It calmed me down a bit but as soon as those mental pictures crossed my mind again, I suddenly knew that I can never be fine again. I even felt

worse now than when I witnessed it personally because this time I'm able to think it through. When that guy's lips explored the lips that was once

only for me, I felt everything around me crumble. It didn't even help when I thought about how Reed was once mine. And how I would do

everything just to go back to the times when everything was normal, when it was just me and Reed.

It was even a thousand times worse than with what happened with Dash. Reed didn't mean to do that. But now she even enjoyed it with that guy.

It makes such a big difference because now I can never do anything about it anymore. I don't even have a right to be mad and have this feeling I

can't even put a name to.

Does Reed really love that guy? But with her seductive stares I can confidently say that she does. I don't even know how I feel about that idea.

Mad? Jealous? Sad? But most of all, hate for myself.

This should have never happened in the first place if I accepted Reed when she first apologized. This should have never happened if I called her

last winter break. And most of all, this shouldn't have happened if I had admitted to myself a long, long time ago that I am still irrevocably in love

with Reed. It hurts so much now to think that this is all my fault. And its hurts much more to think of what the results of my actions were.

Since Reed came back to Easton I barely even talked to her. How could I expect that she would still want me back like how she wanted me before?

And there is also the issue with Ivy. If I hadn't been selfish enough to distract myself by replacing her in my life, which obviously didn't work, then I

wouldn't be suffering the effect of Reed's actions which were the same as mine. But, again, there is a big difference, since we have different

intentions. I am only with Ivy to forget about Reed. But Reed's with that guy because she, as much as I hate to admit it, loves him.

As soon as that thought touched the inner workings of my mind it went right down to my heart and I felt my eyes well up with tears. I don't even

care if I am in the middle of a crowded place. I don't even care if many people are staring at me right now. I don't even care if I look like a love-sick,

crying puppy dog here, because I really am. All I can think about is that Reed can never be mine again. Nothing can ever be the same again.

Only two words kept ringing in my head as I made my way back to Easton. It's over. It's over. It's over. And even if I think about it over and over

again, I can't will myself to believe it.


There it is!! Please review!! Sorry if this chapter is a bit shorter. What did you guys think about it? As you can see both Reed and Josh has no

idea that they still love each other!! I think it will make things much more exciting!! And I'm still gonna ask you about the stalker, who do

you think is it? I might put some SawyerReed romance in the future since many people want that to happen. And do you really want

the ReedJosh romance to end? Review!!

~ftlouie24hollis~