I apologize I know chapter eleven was not my best.
Chapter Twelve
Lucas' POV:
On Monday Maya left school half way through the day. I was worried about her. Riley had been texting me off and on through the weekend giving me updates on how Maya's body was responding to the treatment. It did not sound pretty. Riley told me that on Saturday night Maya had gotten pretty sick and had only recovered a bit Sunday afternoon, insisting that she go to school for at least half the day on Monday.
"Hey." I greeted her when she sat down in science.
"I don't feel good." She mumbled. I was startled. Maya never told me how she was doing. She would crack a joke or ignore me. But then I remembered that I was one of the only people at school that she could talk to about this. It was still a secret. I took in the dark rings under her eyes and the paleness of her skin. She still looked gorgeous, her blonde curls still there and her blue eyes still deep.
"I know." I replied gently.
"I wanna go home." She had said. And after that class she had left. After school I gathered Farkle and Riley and we all went home with Riley to see Maya.
"Knock knock." Farkle called as Riley opened the door and let us in. But Maya wasn't in the living room. "Where is she?"
"She's probably asleep." Riley led us through the house and to her bedroom. And sure enough Maya was asleep in Riley's bed, covered in mountains of blankets.
"Awww." The word slipped out before I could stop it. Both Riley and Farkle gave me a weird look.
"When's her next chemo appointment?" Farkle asked quietly as we all made our way to the bay window.
"A week and a half." Riley sighed. "And it's already making her feel awful."
"Should Farkle and I go?" I asked and looked over at the sleeping Maya.
"No," Riley shook her head, "Maya would kill me if I didn't wake her up to see you guys." Riley walked over and tapped Maya's shoulder. "Maya." Riley gently hummed. "Maya, Lucas and Farkle are here."
"Great." Was Maya's grumbled reply. Her head was still buried beneath the blankets.
"Come on get up." Riley coaxed. "You might feel better if you get something to drink."
"Nothing stays down." Maya replied. "And plus I'm not wearing clothes." When I heard that something inside me jumped. I don't know why it's just….no! Stop! Riley turned around and gave me a look.
"We'll wait in the hall." I nodded and Farkle and I exited while Riley got Maya up. When Riley called us back in, this time Maya was sitting up in bed, a baggy zebra print shirt hanging off of one shoulder and her hair up in a messy bun.
"What's up losers?" she rasped.
"Found clothes?" I teased.
"Don't act so happy." She was joking. She had to be. She couldn't have really thought I was upset that she was dressed….even though I was. I came and sat on the end of the bed.
"Brought you water." Farkle handed Maya a glass. Her hand shook as she accepted the water.
"Thanks but I can't stomach anything right now."
"Try." Riley instructed "Or you'll dehydrate."
"So what?" Maya sighed and sipped a bit of the water. "Gots to be better than this." She used her poor English phrase and then set the glass on the table, and leaned back against the headboard.
"We miss you in school." Farkle piped up.
"I want to play a board game." Maya acknowledged Farkle's comment but didn't add onto it.
"What do you wanna play?" Riley asked and went to the check her game cabinet.
"Let's play Life again!" Farkle cried in excitement.
"Sure let's do that." Maya nodded and Riley brought the board back over to the bed and began to set it up.
"I call the green car!" Farkle shouted before Riley could even open the box. Maya chose the blue car to match her eyes. Her gorgeous sea blue eyes that were so beyond her time. Seen things no one else had. Noticed things most people wouldn't. Read souls that no one would or should. Passed over the other simple pairs of eyes, not knowing that her pair were something so special. Which is why I loved her eyes. Her looks. Because she didn't know what she had. And how many people wanted what she had.
"I get a son!" Riley shouts excitedly. Riley always got so excited about kids.
"I get twin daughters." Maya announces weakly and shakily adds two pink pegs to her car. I grimaced. This kind of Maya scared me. But I felt a sense of protectiveness when I was around her now. I didn't know what to think of it. Maya played it off like she didn't care about the kids. But I could tell she liked it.
"You gonna get some kids in real life?" the words slipped out of my mouth before I could think. She looked up, startled. After some stammering, she found her words.
"I think kids might be nice." She murmured. "If I don't screw things up for them."
"What?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Maya Hart would be a wonderful mother! But before she could respond, a horrible look appeared on her face. Suddenly she was throwing back the cover and racing to Riley's bathroom.
"Maya!" Riley cried, grabbed a bottle off the bedside table, a blanket, and her phone. Farkle and I jumped up but didn't move towards the bathroom as we watched Riley dash in behind Maya and heard the sounds of Maya losing the water Farkle had given her. Farkle and I exchanged worried looks. In a few minutes the sounds died down. "Guys?" Riley called.
"Yeah?" Farkle called back. Riley appeared in the doorway.
"Could you go warm up the cinnamon heat pillow?" Riley asked Farkle. "It's in the guest bathroom cabinet."
"On it." Farkle jogged out of her room and down the hall. Riley turned to me.
"I need to go call my mom. Could you please go sit with her?" Riley's eyes pleaded with me. "Try to make her take her nausea pills."
"Riley, I don't know what to-"
"Talk to her. Make her laugh. And if worst come to worst, hold her hair back." Riley nodded then ran to go call her mom. I took a deep breath and peeked into the bathroom. Maya was wrapped in the fuzzy blanket that Riley had brought in. She was leaning back up against the opposite wall of the toilet. Her hair had fallen down from its bun and her eyes were closed. But somehow she knew it was me.
"Cowboy." She whispered.
"Hey." I slid down next to her.
"I want to die." Her words stung. She couldn't say that. She couldn't possibly mean it.
"No you don't." I reached onto the counter and grabbed the bottle of nausea pills. "You're just tired of all of this."
"If death is inevitable, why even fight?" she sighed.
"Stop sounding so defeated." I ordered. "You're Maya Hart. You never let anything get the best of you."
"This is the worst of me."
"We all like you just the same." I reminded.
"If only-"
"Now don't start blaming yourself." I stopped her.
"I wasn't going to."
"It's no one's fault that you're hear like this. Sometimes these things happen." I really didn't know how to justify this.
"Yeah you keep believing that." She replied.
"What do you mean?" I sat up straighter.
"Some people just have this happen. And others are the victims of some peoples' mistakes."
"What are you saying?" I was getting scared.
"I didn't tell you, didn't let Cory tell you why this happened." She was taking short, raspy breaths. "The doctor said when we first started testing that the seriousness of this was enhanced by my father's smoking. As a child it made my lungs weak. The doctor said that if I hadn't caught that second hand smoke, my body could've fought it away." She let out a breath and lapsed into silence. I couldn't breathe. Because of her father, she was here on the bathroom floor dying of cancer.
"Why….why didn't you-" but suddenly her face was over the toilet. I jumped forward and held her hair back. I rubbed her back as well, just instinct I guess. She was dry heaving. Poor girl. She probably hadn't eaten in days. Or kept it down in days. I started to wrap my arms around her to carry her back to bed or set her back against the wall but her arm whipped out and stopped me. Her reflexes were still there.
"Not yet." She shook her head. "When I'm scrawny and weak and have one of those oxygen tanks, you can carry me."
