Backfire
Chapter Twelve
Ruth and Harry followed the man down the echoing corridor. Hugh's office was situated in one of the older buildings that made up the hospital. The actual Accident & Emergency Department was a brand spanking new building all gleaming surfaces and glass but Hugh and many of the other Consultants preferred to have their offices in the quiet elegance the older buildings offered. The man stopped at a door , unlocking it before saying
"I've been instructed to leave you the key Mrs. Logan, can you please return it to the porters lodge when you leave? And can I say on behalf of the portering service how sorry we are for your loss. Hugh Logan was a gentleman and a fine doctor and we were all proud to have known him."
Ruth stood just inside the office as Harry took the key, thanked the man and confirmed the key would be returned. There were boxes ready for them to pack and stickers so they could decide which pieces of furniture and pictures Ruth wanted to keep.
"Oh Harry" she said "Where do I start? I have no idea what to keep. I need to keep it all, I can't get rid of anything but where am I going to keep it? And Hugh's father and sister might want some of it. How on earth can I make decisions for them?" and she sat down heavily on a sofa by the window putting her head in her hands.
Harry pulled a chair up close to hers, but not to close and said firmly "Don't worry about that Ruth, we, you can arrange to take it all, down to every last paper clip if you want. I thought you might be faced with something like this so I arranged to have a storage facility and transport ready in case they were needed. You can then look at things later when you feel stronger and you can arrange for family to see it as well."
Ruth looked at Harry with gratitude and picked up one box which she began to fill with items that she wanted to take home with her then and there. Hugh's hospital name badge, a photo of the two of them that had pride of place on his desk, a bronze highland cow that he'd bought while he was at medical school in Edinburgh were amongst the things that she carefully placed in the box before they left the room. Harry told her not to worry about the rest of the stuff he would sort out the clearance and transportation and that she was not to even think about the cost he would sort it. She laughed ruefully at that and said to him that she thought she could probably afford to pay after the shock news at the solicitor and asked him to pass all the bills on to her.
As Harry dropped her at her door a small voice in his head was pleading with her to invite him in for a drink but she didn't. She just thanked him, told him he was a true friend and that she'd see him in the morning.
As he drove away he told himself that it was for the best; that she needed time and space to come to terms with her new life and circumstances, that he would have to be patient. And after all patience was something that Harry Pearce had in abundance.
Walking into Thames House the next morning Ruth was overwhelmed by the ordinariness of the situation and remembering the last morning she had done this she had to swallow down a sob. The last time she had approached the security desk to show her pass as far as she was concerned Hugh had still been alive, when in fact he'd already been dead.
"Welcome back Ms. Evershed" said the guard as he gave her pass a cursory glance. "Can I say on behalf of me and the lads how sorry we are, and, and if we can do anything, anything at all for you just let us know."
Smiling the smile that she had perfected over the past few weeks whenever condolences were expressed to her Ruth thanked the man and hurried away so that he wouldn't be able to see that the smile never reached her eyes. This was going to be more difficult than she had imagined. In a split second she decided that she would take the stairs, she couldn't risk being trapped in the lift with people who felt obliged to say something to her even though they had no idea what they should be saying. She had experienced enough times like that in Exeter and then again when she'd meet Hugh's colleagues from the all she and they had thought that her place and identity in the world was fixed and secure but now her world had been tilted on it's axis and finding her new place in it would be hard.
Stepping through the pods she looked across to Harry's office and there he sat, already at his desk pouring over a pile of paperwork. She knew he'd be grumpy, he hated "bloody paperwork!" with a vengeance and took every chance he had to tell her he did. That small thought made her smile, maybe it was the normality of it, maybe it was the fact that she could do a simple thing for him that would hopefully make him feel a bit better. And with that in mind ten minutes later she pushed open his door bearing a mug of tea and a plate of biscuits. Harry looked up from his desk, saw her and a broad grin transformed his face "Ruth, you're a life saver" he said before his face crumbled and he blurted out "Yeah Gods and little fishes Ruth, I'm so sorry what a crass and insensitive thing to say, I'm sorry please forgive me. I'm a bloody fool!"
Ruth placed the mug and plate on Harry's desk and left the office returning a few moments later with her own drink. Sitting opposite him she said
"Don't be silly Harry, do you know you're the only person besides Malcolm that's not treated me like I'm made of cut glass that will shatter at any moment since, since. And that's been such help Harry, I need that semblance of normality, I really do. So there's nothing to forgive. Now let's drink our tea and you can bring me up to speed before everyone else arrives and all hell breaks loose."
And so it was that when the other members of Section D arrived for work they were greeted with the welcome and familiar sight of the section head and his senior analyst sat together deep in conversation and they were all comforted and reassured by it for they knew that by her mere presence Ruth would calm Harry.
Ruth found it surprisingly easy to slot back into her role on the Grid, the analyst who had been covering for her had proved to be thorough if a little pedestrian and the notes he'd handed over had been adequate although it didn't take Ruth long to pick up on a couple of things he'd missed. Things that were not at first obvious but that with a little imagination and original thinking were evident. Each night Harry had made a point of being on the Grid to make sure she'd left at a reasonable time. He could tell she was exhausted and on a couple of occasions it had been on the tip of his tongue to offer to take her home but common sense prevailed and he kept his thoughts to himself, even though one night he'd asked Malcolm to take her.
And before she knew it it was Friday. It had been a busy if uninspiring week but Ruth was feeling a sense of achievement. It was good to be back as part of the team and they'd not let her down. They'd given her space when she was feeling fragile, had on a couple of occasions discreetly left her alone when she'd found herself crying for no good reason at all and had protected her from curious and intrusive visitors from other sections. As everyone was packing up for the day it was Danny who came and perched himself on the edge of the desk and said
"Ruth, please say no if you want to but we're all going to The George for a well earned drink. We deserve it, if I never see another form that I have to fill in it'll be to soon! Care to come with me, us?"
Ruth had thanked him slowly but turned down his invitation and so it had gone on for the next three months, Ruth had settled back into the team and was starting to take part in the banter that was so much a part of working on the Grid. Sometimes she reflected it could be thought of as inappropriate but is was the way they dealt with awful and depressing situations which seemed to occur on an almost daily basis.
Life away from the Grid was another matter entirely, she'd contacted Hugh's father and sister and invited them to come and view Hugh's possessions, she'd felt that it was the completely wrong thing to do but she knew the longer she left it the harder it would be. The weekend before they were due to come up from Exeter she'd gone to the storage unit on her own. Harry had arranged for every last thing to be moved just as he had promised. She'd spent hours going through cupboards and drawers, examining everything, putting irrelevant things like the paper clips and blue tack that Hugh seemed to hoard in one of the boxes she'd brought with her. In the end all she took away with her was a couple medical books with annotations that Hugh had written in the margins and his old Edinburgh university scarf which had been tucked away in one of the cupboards. When she'd lifted it to her face she could smell Hugh on it and she'd taken it home and placed it on his pillow stroking it as she fell to sleep.
Hugh's father had been quiet and just walked around in a daze touching things not really commenting , Ruth could tell that the man was still in deep shock and she felt a little guilty for asking him look at his sons effects but she'd realised after she'd looked at it all that on a personal level she needed to do this so she could get back to something akin to normal. Whatever normal was now. His sister was a completely different kettle of fish. Ruth and Lucy Logan had been in the same year at school but had never been close, just the opposite in fact. She had come in with a pad and pencil asking Ruth in a cold voice
"I suppose you've taken what you wanted? So we can have the rest? Good, there's some nice pieces of furniture here. What do you say Dad?" Not waiting for her father to reply she'd carried on "We'll take it all, this is the stuff from his flat as well? Yes we'll take it all and then his familyin Exeter can see what they want. Of course it's going to cost a fortune to transport it down there..."
Ruth had quickly offered to pay the cost of transportatio and for a storage facility in Exeter for as long as it was needed. She waited for Lucy to broach the subject of Hugh's will so she was not surprised when Lucy asked point blank if the will had been read and if the family had been left anything.
Ruth had explained that Hugh had in fact left everything to her but that she would be making provision for Hughes father and intended to set up trust funds for Lucy's two children and she offered to pay off the balance on Lucy's mortgage and give them enough money so they could all take a holiday together. Lucy had attempted to be magnanimous about the offer but could not help but say
"He must have left you a bit then. Just remind me how long were you two married."
And that had been that, there had been no more news. Lucy had sent a curt e mail saying everything had arrived and that the storage was adequate and that all further communication should be through their solicitors.
She'd received the e mail late on Friday afternoon so when Adam had casually mentioned in passing that they were all going to The George she'd thought to Hell with it. Why not.?
Really struggled with this chapter. I don't want to push to hard as I can't see Ruth falling into Harry's arms at the drop of a hat and I think my evil mind has come up with another nasty twist to this tale!
