Has it really been two weeks since I last updated? Damn, time flies. Of course it would, I'm packing up boxes and boxes of stuff to move house (half of it I didn't even know I owned! How bad is that?) So, anyway, moving throws off ones groove slightly... and deprives me of actual time to write. Getting this chapter done has not been easy.
Quick replies to the reviews I can't respond to:
hecatefan: I have a plan, believe it or not, that takes the episode that shall not be named into account. Seriously, I haven't rewatched that episode. Can't bring myself to. Joan was burnt at the stake so no Joan/Gabriel love, thankfully.
anon: Of course he will!
Kay: Either the next chapter, or the one after. I've got everything but a name.
Tina: Thank you, I always worry about writing about the interactions between the angels. There'll be more exploration of his family in later chapters because I really started this to flesh him out a little more. I worried about that passage between Gabriel and Hecate too, so I'm pleased you liked it.
Sandra: See above response. I like playing with the family part, and the Gabriel bit, so I'm definitely using it more in the future.
Chapter Eleven: Aftermath.
Gabriel's visit has left Hecate with a great deal to consider. Though the bond forged between them all those years ago has weakened and frayed over the decades, it still clings to existence. That bond bothers her, it should have broken as soon as Gabriel and Kali had tumbled into bed together. The only reason it could still exist is if one or other of them were still clinging to it.
She is almost certain that it is not her.
Still, there are advantages to still being bonded to Gabriel and when she feels the shudder run through it she is quick to make her excuses to Anubis and make her way to Gabriel's favoured safe house. He is not there, not yet, and the building is cold, the fire long dead and dust coating the furniture. Hecate waves a hand, cleans the room, settles into a chair and does not have to wait long for her friend to arrive.
He is wide eyed when he turns up and for a moment Hecate thinks that he has been to see Joan, that he has discovered the truth behind the French girl's voices. It takes only a moment to realise how wrong she is when he meets her eyes.
"Did you tell her?" She demands, the first thing that occurs to her, the only reason for the haunted agony in his golden eyes.
"Is that all you're concerned about?" He snaps. "Is your precious hide all that bothers you?" The words are harder than she expects and yet nothing more than she deserves.
"No, idiot, it's you I'm worried about," she hisses in response and he glares at her, arms folded over his chest. "I don't want to come here one day and find you with an angel killing blade in your chest. Hades, Gabriel, is it so terrible to think that I care about what happens to you?"
"Oh? And why would anyone?" She flinches. "My own brothers didn't care enough about me to see how much their betty bickering hurt me. Kali loved Loki, she never saw the real me! My own Father just let me up and leave with no word, no call, no attempt at consolation! If he couldn't love me enough to get over his grief and stop me, then how can anyone?"
"Self pity doesn't suit you, Gabriel," Hecate's voice is cold, her hands snapping up to grasp at muscular arms as she steadies him, then watching calmly as he wrenches himself away from her.
"I..." he stops, settles heavily into one of the chairs and puts his head in his hands. Hecate watches in silence, not moving as he struggles to put his thoughts in order. "Father," the word is a plea, the soft cry of a frightened child. "She kicked me out, Hecate. I didn't get a chance to tell her."
Now she does follow him, kneeling on the thick carpet that covers cold stone so that she can rest her hands on his thighs. He does not take his hands away from his face, she can feel him trembling beneath her fingers as he fights for control of himself. This is her fault, she realises, pushing him away when she should have invited him in. Hecate could have given him what he wanted, what she knows he needed, and instead she ignored it. She pushed him towards another she knew would hurt the archangel, one she knew would abandon him.
Gabriel wants a family, needs a family, craves the love that his Father once showed him.
"I'm sorry, Gabriel," she tells him and he slides to the floor, slipping into her embrace and she knows that she should push him away because she can feel Anubis calling on the fringes of her awareness. She does not. She holds him tight to her, feels his fingers dig painfully into her back, and runs her own through his hair as she teases it from the braid that holds it in place. He does not cry, Hecate believes that he will never gain the ability to do that, but he does seek the comfort that she offers as she holds him. It goes against her better judgement, ignoring the call of her lover in favour of her friend, but right now she is willing to cast all thought of politics aside. She owes Gabriel that much. It will not aid her reputation, and it will certainly not help her strained relationship with Anubis.
If Anubis were to leave her now, her best bet would be to turn her back on Loki entirely so that his damaged reputation does not drag her under. Hecate is loyal to those she considers a true friend, however, and she will not leave him. She stays until Gabriel stops shaking, until he pulls away from her with a shuddering breath and thanks her with a smile that does not reach his eyes. Instead he seems to burn with malice and anger. This is not going to be a good time for the prideful occupants of the world. All he will need is the slightest of excuses. She hopes that many will give them to him.
SPN
The years continue to move on, Gabriel throws himself into his work with a malice that reeks of a desperation to forget. He does not want to remember the long nights in Kali's arms, does not want to remember the love that he felt for her. It is a love that he still feels, even if it fails to burn as brightly as the years pass.
Hecate spends ever increasing amounts of time with him, her relationship with Anubis faltering until it finally fails at a midwinter party when she walks in on Freyja and the jackal in a somewhat compromising position. Such a public act of betrayal does untold damage to Hecate's position among the others, that neither of the pagans would fear her wrath shows others that she is barely worth considering. Not even Kali rallies to comfort her and Gabriel curses the politics that have hurt them all so badly.
He does not wonder for a moment if there is any other reason that Kali would turn on Hecate in such a way.
Gabriel enjoys his time with Hecate. They fight and they bicker, some years more than others, and there is still that underlying warm feeling that has simmered for centuries, but neither acts on it. Neither feels the need to. The triple goddess feeds well while Gabriel is working out his frustration, while the rage of Loki courses through him and burns away all but the smallest ghost of the archangel he once was. It almost hurts to lose himself in this way.
He almost wishes that it did not.
He returns to their safe house late one morning, having spent a night in the company of a dark haired woman who made up for her lack of experience with her enthusiasm, to find the great room empty and cold. Something pulses through him, that same dragging and nagging feeling that has bothered him all night, it is almost as though the pieces of Hecate and Loki in him itch.
The spark of power that is Hecate has always been clearer to him than the others, even than Kali ever was, and it takes a moment of thought for him to find her. She is at a crossroads, arms folded over her chest as she faces two people. One is a common woman, eyes red with tears and a track of blood dripping slowly from her lips. The other is tall, beautiful, and surrounded by darkness and hate. This is not the first demon that Gabriel has encountered in his years as Loki, it will not even be the first that he has destroyed, but this is the first time that he has seen one encroaching on Hecate's turf. He had not realised, before, just how bad it had gotten for the triple goddess.
"This is cozy," he comments as he steps out of the tree line. Hecate does not even startle and it makes him wonder if she senses him with the same ease that he does her.
"What are you doing here, Loki?" Hecate demands, voice hard though her eyes do not waver from the demon.
"Little bird told me you might be in a bit of trouble, old friend. I thought I'd lend a hand."
"I can handle a demon," she points out.
"I know, but I can do it better," he grins at his friend and she sighs, hand twitching as though she is reaching to pinch the bridge of her nose.
"You aren't a part of this, Trickster," the demon hisses, her eyes burning red for a moment as she glances away from the goddess. Hecate grins in triumph as she takes advantage of the lapse, lunging forward to drive a blade between the ribs of the woman the demon wears.
Gabriel sees the blood soaked stake before Hecate does, sees the demon shift and knows what she is going to do. He does not shout, does not think, he simply reacts; blurring from his position by the tree as he conjures the simulacrum of himself in front of Hecate and allowing it to take the blow. The sound of Hecate's scream of rage fills his ears as he slips from the crossroads, he does not need to be here and the demon does not need to see him. Hecate can handle this now and she is not going to be happy with him when she gets back to the safe house. The only thing he can do is wait for her to conclude whatever bargain she was making and let her vent her displeasure.
For a brief moment he considers just not being there when she returns. He knows that it is useless, she has always been able to locate him eventually whether he wants her to or not, and so he waits.
"What in Hades was that?" She spits when she appears an hour later. Gabriel studies her, the way that her eyes flash and her hair has worked loose of the multitude of pins and chains she has used to secure it.
"I just saved your life, Hecate, there's no need to thank me," he mutters, not bothering to get up out of his seat. She is going to rant at him, scream and probably throw things, but he is determined that he is not going to rise to it this time. The last time he did she did not speak to him for three years.
"If you hadn't interfered it wouldn't have been necessary, Gabriel!"
"I'll remember that for the next time I see a stake come your way," he replies. The tension between them is mounting and everything in him is screaming for him to snap, to confront her with the same aggression.
"Did you even think?" She hisses. "That thing could have killed you!"
"I'm not one of you, Hecate, stakes don't have the same effect," he points out and is rewarded with a fresh tirade.
He listens to her swear at him for a while, the way that she bites off curses in a dozen languages, and it makes him wonder if there is something more to her anger. It hits him rather suddenly as she rants, as she throws a simple clay plate across the room; she was scared for him. He snaps up a bowl of grapes to eat and hide his smirk behind. Hecate cares about him far more than she is willing to let on.
After all the disappointments he has suffered at the hands of his family and the goddess he dared to love, this is a spark of warmth.
"Are you quite finished?" He asks when she goes silent, tendrils of black and red magic snarling around her. "Do you want to hear my side of things now?"
"Fine," she snarls, "lets hear the excuse."
"I like having you around," he tells her after a moment. "I don't trust you," he adds, "I'm not completely stupid." The hard edges have not left her eyes as he speaks and after the briefest flash of a superior smirk his face settles into something more serious. "You're the closest thing I've got to a family now, Hecate, I'm not about to let that slip by."
Her smile is shy, almost surprised by his admission. Gabriel snaps his fingers again.
"Massage?" He asks and she laughs as he leads her to the tall, muscular, young man he has created for just such a purpose.
So my frustrations may have coloured their interactions slightly. Not really all that much of a surprise, to be honest.
Artemis
