A/N: I just realized that this story has become AU due to oversight rather than planning. I completely forgot that Sam was on the Apollo, which was sent to the Pegasus Galaxy to search for Atlantis when it went missing. In this story line, it was someone else who was sent to save the day. I really intended to have this story be as true to cannon as possible, but it doesn't really change the plot so I'm not too worried. Thanks for the reviews, and enjoy!

* * * *

It was no use. Daniel had to admit it to himself – he was getting absolutely no work done.

He blamed part of it on sleep deprivation. He hadn't gotten more than a few hours sleep every night for the last three weeks, and there was no sign of this changing.

Sam's departure had left him feeling lonelier than he'd felt in a very long time. He'd tried to immerse himself in work, scouring his department for translations he could assist with or any other project he could get his hands on. He'd even considered taking some time to study the Asgard core at Area 51. He'd tried everything he could think of but found himself more frustrated than ever. It was the first time this tactic had failed him and he had no idea what to do.

His mind flashed back to the morning's breakfast.

"Damn it!" Daniel had exclaimed as the hot coffee that should be in his cup burned the skin on his hand. Sighing, he went to the sink and ran cool water over it. Not a major burn, an unpleasant experience nonetheless.

"Careful Jackson," Mitchell called out to him. "That's the third time this week I've seen you injure yourself."

Daniel ignored him and took his customary seat at the table.

"Indeed, Daniel Jackson, you have seemed most preoccupied." His two teammates were staring at him in a way that told Daniel they wanted answers. He dropped his head and sipped his drink, knowing it would only put off the inevitable.

"Come on, what gives?" Mitchell demanded.

"It's nothing. I just haven't been sleeping that well." He looked at his friends to show them he was being sincere.

It wasn't only nightmares that kept him awake. If that was all, he could handle it. He'd been plagued by nightmares all his life.

No, it was the good dreams that made him want to stay awake as long as possible. It was the thoughts of seeing Sam's smile, touching her face, kissing her... Daniel shook his head. Yes, those were the dangerous thoughts that were keeping him up at night.

He'd reassured his friends that he was fine and hastily retreated to his office. At least here he wouldn't have to worry about someone finding out what was going on with him.

If he was being completely honest with himself, though, it was more than lack of sleep. He was, in a word, depressed.

It was an usual state for Daniel to find himself in. Not that he hadn't had his fair share of difficult times. There were a thousand memories he could recall that would force any normal person to have seriously dark thoughts. He'd usually found a way to cope with them, though. He'd always bounced back.

But this time, he just couldn't seem to do it. It was as if tiny remnants of his past were weighing down on him. Individually, they were harmless enough. But all at once, the force was crushing. He carried it with him every where he went. He couldn't seem to escape the feelings of hopelessness that were eating away at him and he had no idea how to fix it.

Teal'c stood in the doorway, silently watching the emotions play across his best friend's face. When Daniel hadn't shown up for lunch, Teal'c had known something was deeply disturbing his friend. He hadn't realized the true depth of Daniel's pain until this moment.

He entered the room and closed the door.

"It is time to tell me what is on your mind, Daniel Jackson." Teal'c spoke the words calmly and gently, but his tone made it clear that he meant exactly what he'd said.

Daniel peered at Teal'c with blank eyes. Maybe this would help. But how could he begin.

"I don't know what to say," Daniel replied wearily. "I literally cannot find the words. Ironic, considering I'm a linguist." His sarcastic attempt at humor did not phase his friend.

"Then perhaps I should start for you. You are lost, my friend. I am here to help you find your way back."

The two brothers gazed at each other, letting the meaning of the words seep into them.

"I don't know if you can, Teal'c."

"Nor do I. But that will not prevent me from trying," he answered, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "When did you first begin feeling this way?"

Daniel gave a short, harsh laugh. "The moment I unburied the Stargate on Abydos."

Teal'c straightened up in his chair, understanding washing over him. Daniel was having to come to terms with a lifetime of difficult choices and painful experiences. It was something every warrior dealt with. He'd though Daniel had faced this already, but apparently that was not the case.

"You are at a turning point, my friend," Teal'c said. "You find yourself standing in a desert of pain and suffering and you feel responsible for it all. I know how you feel. Please allow me to give you some advice." He paused, waiting for Daniel to respond. At the slight nod of his friend's head, Teal'c continued.

"While pain is sharper than love, it is not stronger. The ills you have caused in your life may be great, but they will never be greater than the love you have given and earned."

"I'm sure you're right, Teal'c, but my heart says otherwise."

"Give it time, Daniel Jackson."

"Thanks, Teal'c. I will."

Despite his words, Teal'c knew he had not really reached Daniel. He would have to keep trying.

"You did not eat with us earlier," Teal'c mentioned, changing the subject.

"What?" Daniel asked, perplexed.

"We missed you during lunch," Teal'c replied.

"Lunch?" Daniel asked, still confused. He glanced at his watch and saw that it was now three o'clock in the afternoon. At that very moment, his stomach growled. "I didn't realize."

"Would you like me to accompany you to the cafeteria?" Teal'c asked.

"Ah, no, that's okay. Thank you, though." The two stood and walked to the door. Just before leaving, Teal'c placed a hand on Daniel's shoulder and looked his friend in the eyes.

"Colonel Carter will be fine, Daniel Jackson." Releasing his hold, Teal'c turned and walked from the room.

Daniel stood there for a moment, wondering how Teal'c had known. The stoic soldier had always been perceptive, and it seemed he hadn't lost his talent for picking up on Daniel's secrets. He allowed himself a small smile and made his way to the mess.

* * * *

Four hours later, Daniel's energy had not improved. He still couldn't focus on anything related to work and had just decided to head home for the night when his phone beeped.

"Hello?" He answered automatically. He hoped it wasn't anything major.

"Dr. Jackson, I was hoping you were still in."

"What can I do for you Walter?"

"Well, sir, I just wanted to let you know that there's a file waiting for you in your email. It's from Atlantis."

"What?" Daniel asked, his mind racing.

"The regular check-in was this afternoon. They usually send us a data-burst full of files and we sort through them and deliver them. This time around there was a file that appears to be intended for you. At least, we're hoping it is."

"I'm sorry, what?" he repeated.

"It was simply named 'Dear Daniel,' sir. The files are typically labeled more specifically, and as there are hundred's of Daniels, we had to guess a bit to know who to send it to. Considering Col. Carter encrypted the file, however, we're pretty sure it's meant for you."

"Ah, thanks Walter." Daniel felt dazed. Sam had written to him!

"Not a problem, Dr. Jackson. Have good evening."

"You too." He hung up the phone and went to his computer. He quickly retrieved the file and opened it. He could hardly wait.

The encryption precaution required him to type a password before allowing himself access. He paused.

He had assumed he and Sam would communicate while she was away, but they'd never discussed the logistics. He would have to try random guesses to see if they worked.

He started asking himself what Sam might have chosen. He tried everything from her birthday to the name of her cat. Nothing worked. After an hour, he took a coffee break and tried to clear his head. He must be making it too difficult. Sam wouldn't have picked something too obvious or too random. It would have to be something that only the two of them would know. That's when it hit him. He rushed back to his desk, asking himself how he could have been so stupid.

It was their favorite joke. It'd started back in the early days. After a week of late nights run ins, each of them having stayed at the base to work on something that was "urgent," Sam had jokingly suggested they start a club for workaholics. Daniel had replied that he his work load wouldn't permit any more commitments.

The bit had taken off from there. Files would randomly appear on Daniel's desk carrying a logo Sam had developed, which featured two coffee mugs and the words "Workaholics Club" inscribed above. Not to be outdone, Daniel had responded by typing up a welcome letter in fifteen languages, one of which was computer code. Over the year's they had even developed a list of rules one must follow to officially be a workaholic.

He typed in "WorkaholicsClub" and, at last, the file opened.

He read the words slowly, savoring them. God, how he missed her! He imagined her, sitting in her office and smiling as she wrote some parts, frowning during others. He was amazed at how well she knew him and could anticipate his thoughts. When he got to the part about his parents, he felt tears welling in his eyes. He felt so close to her in that moment.

He printed out the letters to take home with him. Maybe tonight wouldn't be such a bad night after all.